Jump to content

[DomLuka] DD 35 (Pre-release discussion)

glomph

Recommended Posts

glomph Initiate Scribe

glomph

Posted
Posted

I can't believe how the four months have gone since I flew back home with Grandma Alice, and now we're getting ready for the wedding. Tomorrow I'll head to the airport to pick up Luke and Jase and Da-, er, Eddy. I couldn't talk Seth out of the Monopoly marathon and get him out here. He'll make it up to me when I see him in a few days. Luke has been driving everyone nuts. Jase is concerned that he started packing for the trip at the end of September.

 

Mom didn't meet me when I got back. My brain knew she wouldn't, but I had to come back and see. It was good to see my old friends a time or two and see how our different directions in life have taken us. All of them are planning to head to California or back East for college. Grandma's new family seem nice enough, but I don't think I can ever let them know about my being gay, not that I'll be around enough for it to matter.

 

Eventually I'll ask Seth why he believes that Aaron has really changed just because he quit drinking. I wouldn't ever let Seth put Aaron on to talk when I called him. And what's with Dave? Luke says he seems more disappointed than relieved that Angela told him it was a false alarm.

 

We're flying home right after the wedding. When I'm not with Seth, I'll go back through the things I put under the bed until time to start at my new school.

Link to comment
glomph Initiate Scribe

glomph

Posted
  • Author
Posted
That's the price of fame. Dom has slash/fan fictions of his stories. =^^=

 

I guess it's that. I thought of it more as a proof of concept, how easy it would be to wrap things up after Chapter 34 with just a few paragraphs. Obviously Dom would do it a lot better, and we'd all cry. I didn't work at sounding like Rory, but in retrospect I think he should sound different after four months of coming to terms with things and growing up. And as I reread it, I think the bit about Aaron was a nice touch.

 

I started to write this as a reply to the Chapter 34 discussion, but decided that it would be more fun for people to see the topic in the list. I don't think I've ever started a new topic here before anyway.

 

I am NOT however advocating that the story end now or in this way. :thumbdown:

 

But since Dom has pulled so much together and his attention seems to have shifted to another story, I wouldn't be surprised if he wraps it up soon.

Link to comment
glomph Initiate Scribe

glomph

Posted
  • Author
Posted
I mostly wrote that to let glomph know I appreciated what he wrote.

 

Thanks. That was sweet of you.

 

Dom's version is more likely to be "It seemed like these four months back in Nevada would never end." It can seem quick for the reader, but for a guy that age who has put his new life on hold for four months, separated from father(s), friends, and boyfriend(s), it would seem interminable. And what is Aaron doing over at Seth's? Given the nature of psychological time, though, it is possible that the days would seem interminable, and the weeks would be interminable (he's in school), but the four months are over before he knows it.

Link to comment
DavyReader Initiate Scribe

DavyReader

Posted
Posted
Mom didn't meet me when I got back. My brain knew she wouldn't, but I had to come back and see...

 

When I'm not with Seth, I'll go back through the things I put under the bed until time to start at my new school.

I am not sure that the future will prove you right here. As I see it, Rory's finally realizing the spell his dead mother has held over him could be the climax Buddha has been waiting for so long. Clearly, this would throw him into an emotional crisis, the beginning of which we might have seen in chapter 34. What with the desert heat and Seth's blandness, Dom did a fine job making us readers (and Rory?) drowsy and content (except for the LRITEs), figuratively spoken, but then all of a sudden he rushes things by letting GA blow the horn. It may be an unusual method, but it's certainly an interesting alternative to constant tension building, like in TOU.

Link to comment
glomph Initiate Scribe

glomph

Posted
  • Author
Posted
As I see it, Rory's finally realizing the spell his dead mother has held over him could be the climax Buddha has been waiting for so long. Clearly, this would throw him into an emotional crisis, the beginning of which we might have seen in chapter 34.

 

That crisis and learning to deal with the new family and the old friends back in Nevada could easily fill another ten chapters.

 

Alternatively, the crisis could take up the week and he decides not to go back at all except for a visit for the wedding. Then that's sort of worked out, and Dom suggests the ways in which everything else progresses and wraps it all up in a couple of chapters.

 

I guess I made Rory entirely too rational.

Link to comment
buttershots Initiate Scribe

buttershots

Posted
Posted
Dude, where have yo been?? you havent read it yet??

 

NICK!!! :P lol I had just checked out the "Hosted Authors" website and I KNEW there wasn't a ch. 35...but I read that and second guessed myself! That is, until I read Kitty's response. :lol: So shame on you for teasing! :P

 

I have to say that was a good one though! ;)

 

- Kaiten

Link to comment
Anoni Initiate Scribe

Anoni

Posted
Posted
Dude, where have yo been?? you havent read it yet??

 

 

I recently checked to see if there was another chapter up. I just about had a heart attack when you said 35 was up and i hadn't read it yet.

Link to comment
glomph Initiate Scribe

glomph

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Guys, come on. It's ARIZONA, not Nevada.

 

Sheesh, it takes an Aussie to say it... ;)

 

Very good writing, btw, glomph, even if your geography is a bit off :D

 

Thanks. I would try to write a story myself, but I don't guess I'd get away with starting with Chapter 35 and ending the story in a few paragraphs.

 

As for geography, doesn't Grandma Alice live in Nevada, and Eddie, et. al., live in Arizona? So in my version, he flies back with GA to Nevada at the end of the week after Chapter 34 and spends about 4 months until the wedding, and then is to head back with Eddie to Arizona.

 

I'll never become an author if I can't remember where my characters live.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Our Privacy Policy can be found here: Privacy Policy. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue..