Corrupt A Wish

[Valkyrie]

Granted.  The story posts, but the writing is subpar. 

 

I wish my cats would sleep through the night instead of waking me up at 3:00 am.  

[drpaladin]

Granted. Now they sleep whenever you are home.

 

I wish I had waited about eating that sandwich.

[Valkyrie]

Granted.  You waited to eat the sandwich and now it's too late.  Someone else ate it.  And it was delicious.

 

I wish my foot hadn't fallen asleep.  

[drpaladin]

Granted. Now it's tapping out an annoying ditty over and over.

 

I wish I could find this photo to settle an argument.

[Wesley8890]

Granted you find it but its torn to pieces.

 

I wish the Toronto Blue Jays didn't have such homophobic players

[Valkyrie]

Granted.  You find the photo, but it proves the other person's point. 

 

I wish someone would buy the vacant house next door. 

[AK79]

8 hours ago, Wesley8890 said:

Granted you find it but its torn to pieces.

 

I wish the Toronto Blue Jays didn't have such homophobic players

 

Granted.  Now they don't have ANY players.  (seriously doesn't know who the Toronto Blue Jays are--is that some sort of sportsball team?)

 

8 hours ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You find the photo, but it proves the other person's point. 

 

I wish someone would buy the vacant house next door. 

 

Granted.  Someone does buy the house next door.  They are the neighbors from hell.

 

I wish I didn't hear about my lack of pulling down Virginia Creeper off the house once a week.

[Valkyrie]

Granted.  You now hear nothing at all.  

 

I wish all my paperwork was done.  (yeah, I know I wish for this a lot, but I have a lot of paperwork)  

[Slytherin]

Granted, boss did paperwork, but now your boss moved into the vacant house next door

 

I wish I had a cat

[Valkyrie]

14 minutes ago, Slytherin said:

Granted, boss did paperwork, but now your boss moved into the vacant house next door

 

I wish I had a cat

Oh that would be just cruel!  lol

 

Granted.  You have a cat from hell.  It scratches and bites you and the furniture and howls all night.  

 

I wish I had bought two cookies instead of only one. 

[Slytherin]

Granted, but the other cookie has Surströmming in it  

 

I wish I had a bigger car

[Valkyrie]

Granted.  You now own a Hummer that takes up two lanes, gets one mile per gallon, and requires you to pay for two parking spots at your apartment complex. 

 

I wish it was a four day weekend. 

[Wesley8890]

21 minutes ago, Slytherin said:

Granted, but the other cookie has Surströmming in it  

 

I wish I had a bigger car

Thats just evil!

 

13 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You now own a Hummer that takes up two lanes, gets one mile per gallon, and requires you to pay for two parking spots at your apartment complex. 

 

I wish it was a four day weekend. 

Granted but its the last day of it

 

I wish I had a muse

[Valkyrie]

Granted.  You have lots of muses. None of them are very good, though.  

 

I wish surstromming tasted good.  

[drpaladin]

9 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You have lots of muses. None of them are very good, though.  

 

I wish surstromming tasted good.  

 

Granted. You develop an affinity for it, but now a cloud like odor of herring follows wherever you go.

 

I wish my popularity as an oracle would diminish, at least for a day.

 

 

[Valkyrie]

Granted.  Your popularity is now nil and no one takes you seriously ever again. 

 

I wish I had a personal chef. 

[drpaladin]

6 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  Your popularity is now nil and no one takes you seriously ever again. 

 

I wish I had a personal chef. 

 

Granted. Not a good one though.   read that one wrong.

 

I wish I could pause time.

Edited May 19, 2017 by drpaladin

[Valkyrie]

1 minute ago, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. Your pet appreciates your effort by licking your face.  

 

I wish I could pause time.

 

 

Granted.  You can now pause time.  But you can't unpause it and are doomed to spend eternity looking at frozen people. 

 

I wish I could afford to take several months off and tour Europe. 

[drpaladin]

LOL  apparently that one did pause time.

[drpaladin]

2 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

 

 

Granted.  You can now pause time.  But you can't unpause it and are doomed to spend eternity looking at frozen people. 

 

I wish I could afford to take several months off and tour Europe. 

 

Granted. But you will absolutely hate what you have to do while touring.

 

I wish I had more energy.

[Valkyrie]

1 minute ago, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. But you will absolutely hate what you have to do while touring.

 

I wish I had more energy.

Granted.  You transcend your physical form to become a being of pure energy.  

 

I wish I could take a nap and still get a good night's sleep.  

[drpaladin]

3 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You transcend your physical form to become a being of pure energy.  

 

I wish I could take a nap and still get a good night's sleep.  

 

Granted. Narcolepsy doesn't affect your night's sleep, but ruins everything else.

 

I wish I knew what I want to eat.

[Valkyrie]

Granted. You know what you want to eat, but can't have it. 

 

I wish I had a pet owl.  

[drpaladin]

1 minute ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted. You know what you want to eat, but can't have it. 

 

I wish I had a pet owl.  

Granted. But it doesn't know Who  Who  whose pet it is.

 

I wish this ripe plum smell would go away.

[Valkyrie]

13 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

Granted. But it doesn't know Who  Who  whose pet it is.

 

I wish this ripe plum smell would go away.

Granted.  It's been replaced by cologne from the Bog of Eternal Stench.  

 

I wish I had the motivation to go for a walk.