C James Posted January 30, 2007 Author Share Posted January 30, 2007 I think that those who were turned off may come back as the story develops and the buzz gets back to them to try the story again. I can't count the number of first-time or 'I dont usually read this but' posts in DK's forum. Word-of-mouth via post, pm or email about a good story will draw in readers every time! :king: That's sure true! I've lately been receiving emails from people who aren't even registered at GA (they had heard about it at some other site, and I'm trying to find out where so I can thank whomever did that.). Much to my amazement, it seems the story is getting a little "buzz" even off-GA. Emoe, thanks for getting me back into writing, and for all that you do. 100% agree. I know I lost readers with the first chapter of my first story because it just wasn't interesting enough (okay -- it was boring). When other people encouraged them to go back and keep reading they realised it picked up and improved from that point. I'm a very picky reader, but I had no problems at all with the first chapter of "Falls Creek Lessons". I loved it. However, the story was already largely compete when I found it, so I was able to just keep reading. BTW, I have a meeting tomorrow (Tuesday) morning, so Ch 12 is unlikely to be posted until the afternoon. THANKS!!!!!!! CJ Link to comment
Site Administrator Graeme Posted January 30, 2007 Site Administrator Share Posted January 30, 2007 That's sure true! I've lately been receiving emails from people who aren't even registered at GA (they had heard about it at some other site, and I'm trying to find out where so I can thank whomever did that.). Much to my amazement, it seems the story is getting a little "buzz" even off-GA. Emoe, thanks for getting me back into writing, and for all that you do. I'm a very picky reader, but I had no problems at all with the first chapter of "Falls Creek Lessons". I loved it. However, the story was already largely compete when I found it, so I was able to just keep reading. BTW, I have a meeting tomorrow (Tuesday) morning, so Ch 12 is unlikely to be posted until the afternoon. THANKS!!!!!!! CJ Falls Creek Lessons was my second novel (though it was the first one I completed). New Brother was my first.... Link to comment
C James Posted January 30, 2007 Author Share Posted January 30, 2007 Falls Creek Lessons was my second novel (though it was the first one I completed). New Brother was my first.... Ahhh! Ooops. I think I've made that same mistake (confusing the two) before, too. Link to comment
C James Posted January 30, 2007 Author Share Posted January 30, 2007 Chapter 12, Ambush!, is up! OK, it's a few hours early, but it is Tuesday here, so, here it is. Link to comment
Site Administrator Graeme Posted January 30, 2007 Site Administrator Share Posted January 30, 2007 A good chapter We're beginning to see some of our suspicions confirmed, and some of the previous oddities explained. Given that the genre seems confirmed as action/adventure, this chapter fits well. If I have to give a negative I think it is because the characters are TOO quick to come up with answers to what is happening. If those answers are correct, then that's a little unbelievable. I'm hoping there are some things they have misunderstood, because it'll make the story that much better when the truth is revealed. Well done! Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted January 30, 2007 Share Posted January 30, 2007 I think it is because the characters are TOO quick to come up with answers to what is happening. If those answers are correct, then that's a little unbelievable. I'm hoping there are some things they have misunderstood, because it'll make the story that much better when the truth is revealed. I tend to disagree with you on this one. I just finished this Michael Connelly, The Narrows, and I got the opposite impression. A seasoned detective, a bunch of FBI profilers find clues that, to any average reader of such fiction, or even the average CSI watcher, scream to high heavens of what they mean, and here are the characters, all puzzled and clueless. So when Steve and Chris, who have been mulling this situation over and over for the last few weeks find more evidence, and learn more about the infamous Piedmont sheriff shenanigans (like having a minor at his house without telling the parents, what does that say about his morality?), the pieces fall into place. And as you point out, maybe they're being mislead (and so are we, poor readers in the hands of the ruthless CJames...) The deer false alarm is fun. I'm starting to regret not to have a paperback copy of the whole thing. Link to comment
EMoe57 Posted January 30, 2007 Share Posted January 30, 2007 The deer false alarm is fun. I, too, enjoyed the 'deer'. On my first pass, I was reading intently, hunched over the keyboard and then sat back and had a belly-laugh when the truth was revealed. Well done, CJ! Link to comment
C James Posted January 30, 2007 Author Share Posted January 30, 2007 A good chapter We're beginning to see some of our suspicions confirmed, and some of the previous oddities explained. Given that the genre seems confirmed as action/adventure, this chapter fits well. If I have to give a negative I think it is because the characters are TOO quick to come up with answers to what is happening. If those answers are correct, then that's a little unbelievable. I'm hoping there are some things they have misunderstood, because it'll make the story that much better when the truth is revealed. Well done! Thanks Graeme!!! Some of the things were rather obvious; the Sheriff's behavior was surely a clue the guys would have picked up on. On some other things, they are merely speculating. I tend to disagree with you on this one. I just finished this Michael Connelly, The Narrows, and I got the opposite impression. A seasoned detective, a bunch of FBI profilers find clues that, to any average reader of such fiction, or even the average CSI watcher, scream to high heavens of what they mean, and here are the characters, all puzzled and clueless. So when Steve and Chris, who have been mulling this situation over and over for the last few weeks find more evidence, and learn more about the infamous Piedmont sheriff shenanigans (like having a minor at his house without telling the parents, what does that say about his morality?), the pieces fall into place. And as you point out, maybe they're being mislead (and so are we, poor readers in the hands of the ruthless CJames...) The deer false alarm is fun. I'm starting to regret not to have a paperback copy of the whole thing. THANKS!!!!!!!! We are getting very close to being able to judge the contest you proposed a while back. I'll comb through the thread and post the predictions in one post, and see how we do. Obviously, we don't know what is on the data stick yet so I may have to wait on some of it. I will confirm that they guys are right that the Sheriff is up to no good, and also that the Sheriff beleives they have the data stick. Further, the Sheriff wants the data stick. Also, I'll confirm that the charges being mysteriously dropped against Eric were not merely a coincidence. On some of the minor details, we, just like in real life, may never know for certain, and have only a reasonable supposition based upon a preponderance of available evidence. As for the speculation, well, all I'll say is that when people speculate, sometimes they get it right, sometimes they get it wrong, and sometimes it is a mix of the two. I will also, at the risk of becoming a pincushion <looks around nervously for the Echidna..> confirm that the Deer are NOT members of the conspiracy. I, too, enjoyed the 'deer'. On my first pass, I was reading intently, hunched over the keyboard and then sat back and had a belly-laugh when the truth was revealed. Well done, CJ! Thanks Emoe!!! I had fun writing that scene. Link to comment
captainrick Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 With a quick tug, Steve undid the top button of my jeans, and I arched up and twisted to get access to his. I tugged the buttons free, and ran my hand inside his jeans, only to be startled by the irritating chirp of the cell phone in his pocket. We broke the kiss, and I eased off Steve to give him room to retrieve the ringing cell phone. He pulled it out, flipped it open, glanced at the screen, and answered the call, "Hi, Dad." FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAN, HAVE A HEART! I'm gettin' close to wantin' to kill Daddy! Oh, and I think it would have been better if the deer had been a herd of wild goat, but I don't know if AZ has wild goats, still though . . . I think it's reasonable that the kids are figuring this thing out. I have to disagree with the Echidna on that point. Chris was shot at for God's sake and almost killed! They know that this is serious and there has to be something major on that stick thingy. Eric must be in the middle of it for the charges to be dropped! Question is, how far does the conspiracy go? The sheriff must be in on it, maybe the DA? CJ dropped a hint about the right Reverand Emoe. Hmmm. Can't wait for more! Rick Link to comment
Jack Frost Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 Normally, if I were the dad...I would sue the hell out of that sheriff for keeping my own underage son in his house without my permission. I hope the count DA or State Attorney cook that idiot sheriff's ass. Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 As for the speculation, well, all I'll say is that when people speculate, sometimes they get it right, sometimes they get it wrong, and sometimes it is a mix of the two. That was really helpful, thank you! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAN, HAVE A HEART! I'm gettin' close to wantin' to kill Daddy! Though this character is suspected of being the evil mastermind by some, he keeps a nice level of morality to this fiction, preventing excesses or overly graphic descriptions. Not like OTHER SHERIFFS of ill repute around these parts... Link to comment
C James Posted January 31, 2007 Author Share Posted January 31, 2007 FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAN, HAVE A HEART! I'm gettin' close to wantin' to kill Daddy! ROFL!! But Rick... It's only Ch 12, and they have already had sex once in the story... Oh, and I think it would have been better if the deer had been a herd of wild goat, but I don't know if AZ has wild goats, still though . . . But is it appropriate for the author to write himself in as a cameo in his own story? Hmmmm, though, our Editor does have a cameo... There are wild goats here, up in the high country, but not in the low desert where Chris and Steve are. Thanks!!!!! Normally, if I were the dad...I would sue the hell out of that sheriff for keeping my own underage son in his house without my permission. I hope the count DA or State Attorney cook that idiot sheriff's ass. Yep, Dad is non too pleased about that, and it is, to say the least, WAY outside of normal or acceptable behavior for a Sherrif. That was really helpful, thank you! But I was merely narrowing down the list of possibilities to... everything. Though this character is suspected of being the evil mastermind by some, he keeps a nice level of morality to this fiction, preventing excesses or overly graphic descriptions. Not like OTHER SHERIFFS of ill repute around these parts... Hehehe... Well, i heard that sexual tension is a good thing to have in a story, so surely sexual frustration is good, too? Link to comment
Conner Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAN, HAVE A HEART! I'm gettin' close to wantin' to kill Daddy! Oh, and I think it would have been better if the deer had been a herd of wild goat, but I don't know if AZ has wild goats, still though . . . .... Rick YES! YES! YES! I'm totally with you on both counts, Rick! Frankly, I haven't been able to get my mind off that note Chris found in Steve's room ever since CJ introduced it. I need closure (or maybe fruition) around that note. "What year is my car?" Now, that a fabulous line! It's now mine, CJ! Don't use it again. Yes, goats would have been so much better!!! Well, at least deer have hooves! Great job on this chapter, CJ!!! Conner Link to comment
EMoe57 Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 ROFL!! But Rick... It's only Ch 12, and they have already had sex once in the story... Ummm, haven't we had the 'fade to sex' situation occur a coupla times already? But is it appropriate for the author to write himself in as a cameo in his own story? Hmmmm, though, our Editor does have a cameo... Now, see - that makes it sound like I wrote myself into the story... nothing could be further from the truth and I want it on record that I asked you to change the name and you deferred so I caved because I was weak from my first reading of DK Link to comment
C James Posted January 31, 2007 Author Share Posted January 31, 2007 YES! YES! YES!I'm totally with you on both counts, Rick! Frankly, I haven't been able to get my mind off that note Chris found in Steve's room ever since CJ introduced it. I need closure (or maybe fruition) around that note. "What year is my car?" Now, that a fabulous line! It's now mine, CJ! Don't use it again. Yes, goats would have been so much better!!! Well, at least deer have hooves! Great job on this chapter, CJ!!! Conner There were several reasons why I picked a '69 Charger for Steve's car. That line was one of 'em. Sorry, though, I'm not done with it yet... Now, see - that makes it sound like I wrote myself into the story... nothing could be further from the truth and I want it on record that I asked you to change the name and you deferred so I caved because I was weak from my first reading of DK Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 Just hope there will be cameos for the zeta-readers as well... A hint for the author: For the Love Chapter 49 (...) Steve and I closed the gates of the large warehouse in which Thaddeus had lured us. Little did the evil fundamentalist know who had been helping us since chapter 15. And who once again had gotten us out from his claws. As we approached the table on which the preacher was spreadeagled, BW, this mysterious and sexy adventurer addressed the ex man of the cloth in his husky voice, to which a hint of an accent added to the man's appeal: "So, Thaddeus, you thought you could ruin these fine young men's lives with your evil ploys? You got them shot at, you had their car bombed, you almost got them burned at the stake, not even mentioning the fact you've got their pics all over the Internet, you dastardly rascal!" The good-looking Frenchman approached Thaddeus' helpless writhing form, eliciting a scared grunt from the wretch. "And you're no Houdini, are you?" He turned to Steve. "My man, a clove hitch this poorly knotted would get any cub scout to blush!" Steve was a bit pissed, but he had got the knot-tying out of the way quickly for he had not been able to kiss me since chapter 18. "Yeah, sure, BW, but he can't move, can he?" BW smiled at us. "OK guys, get out of the way before Steve's dad comes and asks you to go rescue Veronica from some newly-found peril... I'll take it from here." I couldn't help but feel special as I felt Steve's hand on my shoulder. We had a long night ahead... Link to comment
shadowgod Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 Oh, BTW, shhhhhh... Me adding Beta reader to the disclaimer was purely coincidental. If shdowgod (our anonymous beta reader) sees that he might think I am up to something sneaky. It's a good thing he isn't reading this.... So don't tell him! Link to comment
Jack Frost Posted February 1, 2007 Share Posted February 1, 2007 Moi, je pense que C James est qu'un crisse de tabarnak de fifine sale pour me faire toujours attendre les prochaines chapitres. Bondwriter should have a hint what I'm trying to say here. Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted February 1, 2007 Share Posted February 1, 2007 Moi, je pense que C James est qu'un crisse de tabarnak de fifine sale pour me faire toujours attendre les prochains chapitres. Translation: I too want to become part of your great narrative, CJames, with chapters such nicely spaced in time. You rock, wonderful goat. Link to comment
C James Posted February 1, 2007 Author Share Posted February 1, 2007 Just hope there will be cameos for the zeta-readers as well...A hint for the author: For the Love Chapter 49 (...) Steve and I closed the gates of the large warehouse in which Thaddeus had lured us. Little did the evil fundamentalist know who had been helping us since chapter 15. And who once again had gotten us out from his claws. As we approached the table on which the preacher was spreadeagled, BW, this mysterious and sexy adventurer addressed the ex man of the cloth in his husky voice, to which a hint of an accent added to the man's appeal: "So, Thaddeus, you thought you could ruin these fine young men's lives with your evil ploys? You got them shot at, you had their car bombed, you almost got them burned at the stake, not even mentioning the fact you've got their pics all over the Internet, you dastardly rascal!" The good-looking Frenchman approached Thaddeus' helpless writhing form, eliciting a scared grunt from the wretch. "And you're no Houdini, are you?" He turned to Steve. "My man, a clove hitch this poorly knotted would get any cub scout to blush!" Steve was a bit pissed, but he had got the knot-tying out of the way quickly for he had not been able to kiss me since chapter 18. "Yeah, sure, BW, but he can't move, can he?" BW smiled at us. "OK guys, get out of the way before Steve's dad comes and asks you to go rescue Veronica from some newly-found peril... I'll take it from here." I couldn't help but feel special as I felt Steve's hand on my shoulder. We had a long night ahead... OMG! My very first fanfic! Ummm, Chapter 49 and the guys haven't even been bale to kiss since Ch 18?!?!!? OK, WHO LEAKED THE PLOT! BTW, Bondwriter is indeed the Zeta-reader! He reads the chapter right after I put it online, and points out any remaining goofs that I have made. I then go in and fix the posted chapter. THANK YOU Bondwriter!!! (BTW, any errors usually occur when I make changes AFTER Emoe sends me back the edited version.) Oh, BTW, shhhhhh... Me adding Beta reader to the disclaimer was purely coincidental. If shdowgod (our anonymous beta reader) sees that he might think I am up to something sneaky. It's a good thing he isn't reading this.... So don't tell him! Don't worry, its all just a coincidence... really... Moi, je pense que C James est qu'un crisse de tabarnak de fifine sale pour me faire toujours attendre les prochaines chapitres. Bondwriter should have a hint what I'm trying to say here. Translation: I too want to become part of your great narrative, CJames, with chapters such nicely spaced in time. You rock, wonderful goat. Hmmm, now that is an interesting translation, Bondwriter! Jack, Jack, Jack... I make you wait a week between chapters becuase I need to write them! However, speaking of long delays between chapters, there is a certain story called "Moving on" where the author keeps us waiting and waiting and waiting... Link to comment
Jack Frost Posted February 2, 2007 Share Posted February 2, 2007 Translation: I too want to become part of your great narrative, CJames, with chapters such nicely spaced in time. You rock, wonderful goat. I hate you. Hmmm, ch Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted February 2, 2007 Share Posted February 2, 2007 I hate you. Hmmm, ch Link to comment
EMoe57 Posted February 2, 2007 Share Posted February 2, 2007 And goats are indeed symbols of evil. Do you like the way goats look at you? Don't they make you utterly uncomfortable? A goat putting shades on avoids creating this feeling of unease, I guess. Or masks his true intent Link to comment
C James Posted February 3, 2007 Author Share Posted February 3, 2007 I hate you. Hmmm, ch Link to comment
shadowgod Posted February 3, 2007 Share Posted February 3, 2007 Hey!!! Nothing wrong with being a Goat... Not true! Just have a look at the pic below... Nothing evil about me! Emoe! I have no idea what you could possibly mean! I look perfectly normal when I misplace my sunglasses. See? OK, time for me to leak the title of the next chapter! As y'all know, I like to name chapters. Always, the chapter name is relavant to the chapter, just not in the way one might expect. Chapter names: Chapter 1: Falling To Pieces Chapter 2: The Fog Begins to Lift Chapter 3. Get The Rope... Chapter 4: Necktie Party Chapter 5: Interruptus. Chapter 6: Endgame. Chapter 7: Something Borrowed, Something Blue. Chapter 8: Pool Party. Chapter 9: Full Circle Chapter 10: Race with the Devil Chapter 11: Bullet Riddled Body Chapter 12: Ambush As you can see, the titles refer to one or more things within a chapter. Sometimes, like "Race with the Devil" (the high-speed chase and shooting), they are fairly straightforward. Others, like bullet-riddled-body, are slightly misleading, even thought there was, indeed, a bullet riddled body in that chapter (the body of the Jeep). "Ambush" was a reference to the guys fleeing from the Ambush sprung by those sneaky Mule Deer. If anyone has any questions on the chapter titles, please ask away. However, I can't give you anything beyond Ch 13, as I don't have them yet. Oh, Ch 13 is called "The Sermon and the Mount". Leave the Mounties alone! That title is a bit of a stretch... no one will believe there are any RCMP's in Arizona... unless they are on holiday or something. Then how does a Mountie figure into it? Was Emoe involved in less then steller dealings in Canada?? Link to comment
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