Jump to content

  • Join Gay Authors

    Join us for free and follow your favorite authors and stories.

    Aditus
  • Aditus
  • Author
  • 10/07/2015
  • 170 Words
  • 1,560 Views
  • 13 Comments
Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Aditus' prompts and circumstances - 25. Poetry Prompt 14 - Ballade: Five Sibyls

The prompt: write one Ballade based on images from the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. You decide how many syllables to use per line, and whether you wish each stanza to be about a different panel from the ceiling, or flow as an overall impression of the artwork. Include an Envoi and address it to whomever you like.

Five Sibyls

 

Homer unmasked, the lying bard.

And Troy destroyed, it was too late.

Alex the Great’s heroics starred.

And who will be this saviour mate?

She didn’t say, we have to wait.

Now, want to risk it, want some more?

Go on, and step up to the plate

Remember they predicted war.

 

Before you ask, think long and hard,

Enunciate, rephrase, restate.

To question her, be on your guard.

Her answers prophesize your fate

You wouldn’t need something you hate,

Unwanted truth you do abhor,

So, when you stand before her gate,

Remember they predicted war.

 

On scattered leaves, her words were marred.

She didn’t care at any rate.

What once made sense completely jarred,

And you are in a sorry state,

Wish a decision never made,

Heeded the warning from before.

Not ever risen to her bait.

Remember they predicted war.

 

And home you go with stagg’ring gait,

Lips whispering: You lying whore.

Succumbing to the knowledge’s weight.

Remember they predicted war.

Part of the poem already addresses someone, and the Envoi is  more of a conclusion than an address, but this is all the ballade I can do. smile.png Thank you, AC for this challenging prompt. Whew!
©Copyright 2013 Aditus; All Rights Reserved.
  • Like 9
Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
You are not currently following this author. Be sure to follow to keep up to date with new stories they post.

Recommended Comments

Chapter Comments

Aditus
On 10/08/2015 06:45 AM, J.HunterDunn said:

I'm very impressed. I like you singled out the Sybils and focussed on them. This ballade shows the difference between a poet and a rhymer, you being the former. Applause.

:blush: Thank you, Peter! I'm not exactly the religious type, although I admire Michelangelo's work, which made me choose the sibyls. Before I wrote the poem, I did a little research and found them fascinating. *bows*

AC Benus

This is a frickin brilliant poem! I don't know if you'll believe me or not, but when I discovered the wiki page with the full ceiling shown and mapped out, I thought, yeah – the oracles…they are interesting.

 

And here you have picked up on the same topic, and executed a really fine poem.

 

In terms of the Ballade form, I think you've done really well. Your refrain is powerful and integrated effortlessly (or so it seems ;) ) to end each stanza in a natural way. I also note how regular and wonderful your metre is, and how you flawlessly maintain the 8-syllable rhythm throughout! Bravo.

 

As far the slight blip with 'smart' and 'apart' not matching 'bard' etc., I bet you could eventually tweak that and make it perfect. Think about for a few days, and maybe a solution will reveal itself.

 

Thanks for taking the poetry prompt challenge, and for posting a stunner!

Aditus
On 10/09/2015 01:46 AM, AC Benus said:

This is a frickin brilliant poem! I don't know if you'll believe me or not, but when I discovered the wiki page with the full ceiling shown and mapped out, I thought, yeah – the oracles…they are interesting.

 

And here you have picked up on the same topic, and executed a really fine poem.

 

In terms of the Ballade form, I think you've done really well. Your refrain is powerful and integrated effortlessly (or so it seems ;) ) to end each stanza in a natural way. I also note how regular and wonderful your metre is, and how you flawlessly maintain the 8-syllable rhythm throughout! Bravo.

 

As far the slight blip with 'smart' and 'apart' not matching 'bard' etc., I bet you could eventually tweak that and make it perfect. Think about for a few days, and maybe a solution will reveal itself.

 

Thanks for taking the poetry prompt challenge, and for posting a stunner!

Thank you, AC!!! Ha, you would find the blips. LOL One blip less now. Still fighting with apart, because I really like everything else in this line apart from apart.

Anyway, I could have never done this without your explanations and the fine example poems. This was a great challenge and I had fun...well not the whole time, there might have been some cursing too. :hug:

View Guidelines

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Newsletter

    Sign Up and get an occasional Newsletter.  Fill out your profile with favorite genres and say yes to genre news to get the monthly update for your favorite genres.

    Sign Up
×
×
  • Create New...