The Best Year - 16. Chapter 16

I knew Ally wouldn’t say anything in front of Mom, so I offered them both a small smile as I stepped onto the porch. Ally wasn’t paying much attention to me as it was, but Mom nearly attacked me when I stepped into her reach. Wrapping me into a hug, I felt my face flush and I glanced over her shoulder to see the glare Ally still had for Luke, who stood beside me close enough for me to feel his arm slide across my side.

“I’m sorry,” Mom whispered, breaking the hug to grab my face. She quickly kissed my cheek, tears streaming down her face. This was the most unkempt Mom looked that I could remember. Mascara ran down her cheeks and her eyes were puffy. Her hair had fallen or she had taken it down and she didn’t seem to care that she was standing out here barefoot.

“Mom,” I groaned, breaking from the embrace. I didn’t want her all over me in front of Ally or Luke, no matter how upset I was earlier. Seeing her only reminded me that I had lost everything I had worked so hard for and that it happened so easily.

“Luke, Ally,” Mom said, seeming to finally notice that we were all still standing outside on the front porch. The sun was starting to set, sending everything into a twilight haze of yellows, blues, and golds. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to seem like I’m shoving you two out the door or anything, but I’d really like to talk to Jackson alone.”

“It’s fine Mom,” I countered turning to face her. “Really, I don’t care.”

“Okay,” she said, “if you’re sure.”

“I’m fine,” I repeated hoping my voice didn’t crack. I couldn’t have Mom running Ally away when I already decided Luke was going to be there. I wasn’t that damn brave and Ally was already shooting daggers through Luke and me.

“I brought home some burgers,” Mom offered as we followed her back inside. “You all are welcome to join us and eat.”

“I’m not hungry, but thank you Mrs. Forrest,” Ally said, giving Mom a short smile before turning to look at me.

“Mom would be insulted if I don’t eat her dinner, Grace,” Luke added and I grimaced after I realized that Mom never corrected Ally and told her to call her Grace. I wanted to smack Luke in the back of the head and when I shot him a glare he tried not to smile.

Sitting on the couch wasn’t any better. I thought about quickly taking Dad’s chair across from the couch, but Mom took that spot away wanting to sit in my line of sight. Ally sat as close to me as she could, wrapping her arm with mine and resting her hand on my leg too close to my thigh for my liking with Mom in the room. Luke made sure that his knee was pressed against mine, but he kept his hands in his lap. I couldn’t help feel the tension in both of them though, it almost made hearing more bad news completely unbearable. Mom running them off to talk to me alone felt like a better plan now.

“Jackson,” Mom started and I watched her fumble for something in her purse. She ended up dumping most of it out, but when she finally presented a small business card she quickly raked everything back inside her purse not caring how unorganized it had to be now. Knowing her, I knew she would be frazzled all day tomorrow not having it completely in order, she had always kept everything in their proper places and hated clutter.

“Yeah?” I said and I saw that Mom held the card out to me, but her eyes had fallen on Ally’s hand on my thigh. When I spoke she blinked and offered the card to me.

“After we received word that you were losing your scholarship Rick and I started weighing some options,” Mom said as I took the small card in my hand. “Rick pulled some strings and we think we have a solution.”

“What is it?” I asked, my heart racing as I flipped over the business card and saw a pair of names in black bold print.

“We found you another coach,” Mom answered leaning forward, she placed her hands in her lap offering me a careful smile. “Him and his wife coach a competitive club.”

“I have a coach,” I countered. “It didn’t matter much.”

“Rick thinks he has taken you as far as he can,” Mom said, “honey, I’m sorry things didn’t work out with your scholarship, but…”

“If I’m not good enough, what is a new coach gonna do?” I asked looking down at the business card wanting to crumple it up in my fist. Luke nudged against my knee hard enough to mush my leg. I didn’t dare turn my head to look at him though, knowing I wouldn’t be able to hide it from Ally who I could feel staring me down on my other side.

“When Rick and I found out about the college cutting your scholarship,” Mom pressed, blinking a few times when I turned my attention back to her. “He sent Coach Garrison videos of your better meets last season. He has a spot on his team for the upcoming season.”

“Really?” I asked, my heart hammering in my chest. “A real aquatic center club?”

“A real club,” she repeated smiling. “You will have to try out, but the Garrisons are very interested in taking you on.”

“When are tryouts?” I asked and when Mom looked down at her hands and clenched them to her knees I braced myself for bad news.

“Tomorrow after school,” she answered, “we just got the call back today, that is why we sort of ambushed you this evening.”

“What if I don’t want to try out?” I asked and this time Luke and Ally both sighed next to me.

“Why wouldn’t you want to try out?” Ally asked and I jumped when her grip tightened on my leg.

“No, really,” I countered, “what if I’m not good enough and this is as far as I can go?”

“You owe it to yourself to try honey,” Mom said and I could see her wanting to stand up and come around the coffee table to hug me. She nearly stood, but leaned back in the chair with tears in her eyes.

“You haven’t really cared about my swimming,” I argued, shaking my head.

“I know,” she sighed, blinking away her tears. “I know, but I do remember when you got the scholarship, how happy you were.”

“Mom,” I groaned shifting around in my seat.

“Don’t let this setback get to you, life is full of them believe me,” She added glancing between the three of us sitting on the couch. “I didn’t make it to any national spelling bees.”

“Focus, Mom,” I said, shaking my head.

“Are we going to a tryout tomorrow?” Mom asked and when I heard her including herself I fought back a smile and only managed a nod fearing my voice would crack.

“Well now that’s settled,” Ally said leaning into me close enough that I could smell her lingering perfume that she probably sprayed on herself this morning before school. My face flushed when I noticed Mom studying us.

“If you do make the swim team,” Mom said, peeling her eyes away from Ally clinging herself to me. “You will need a sponsor.”

“How much will that cost?” I asked gently, nudging away from Ally when Mom’s eyes fell back on the two of us. I could tell she still wasn’t too fond of the idea of me dating the principal’s daughter. I wondered how she would react if she knew that Luke and I had kissed. I couldn’t imagine her taking it well and when I felt Luke’s knee leave mine I smiled hoping I didn’t give myself away.

“Don’t you worry about that,” Mom answered, “Your father and I have decided to sponsor you.”

“If you want, I could tell Dad to ask the school board to pay for it,” Ally said and I glanced over to see her smiling at Mom. “I mean he’s the best athlete to come out of our school since forever and we don’t even support him.”

“We have the extra money, but thank you Alison,” Mom said waving her hand gently. “We just might not get to vacation next summer.”

“Mom,” I started, but then swallowed. The confrontation about opening my mail and not telling me dying on my lips. I knew it was her own way of protecting me, even if I didn’t really appreciate her keeping things like this from me. “Thank you.”

“Well,” Mom said as she smiled and stood. “Now that we’re all settled, do you guys want anything to drink?”

“No, I need to get going,” Ally answered then she turned to me, the smile she offered Mom faltering. “Walk me out, Jackson?”

“Yeah,” I mumbled, not meeting Luke’s eyes as we stood and I led Ally to the front door.

“I need to be getting home too,” Luke said when I held the front door open for Ally. I watched as he stood and I frowned when Mom gave him a quick hug before letting him walk around the couch to where we stood. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow at school.”

“Yes,” Ally said, “I guess you will.”

“Talk to you later, Jackson,” he added, not waiting for me to reply. It was enough to cause Ally’s grip on my hand to tighten and I hoped that Luke was proud of himself.

“The food is getting cold, so don’t be too long,” Mom said and I grimaced as Ally nearly bolted from the living room pulling me along with her. I barely had time to close the door behind us and instead of walking to her car she led me down the stairs and around the corner to the side of the house, away from large front windows where Mom could see.

“Jackson, we need to talk,” She said as she let go of my hand.

“About what?” I asked flexing my fingers to ease some of the stiffness from her death grip on it.

“You didn’t call me,” she said and I wondered if I had accidentally forgotten to call her after promising to, but nothing came to me.

“Sorry?” I offered forcing a smile. “I’m sorry if I forgot to.”

“Forgot to!” She yelled, throwing her hands into the air. “You didn’t forget to, Derek called me and told me that I better go find you.”

“Why?” I asked, crossing my arms.

“Because you were upset!” She answered shaking her head. “And you didn’t call me, your girlfriend.”

“So?” I asked frowning when she glared at me. I wasn’t used to confrontations with Ally, so far we hadn’t really fought or argued much. It had been as easy as breathing with her.

“Then I see you roll up to the house with Luke Clarke,” she hissed stepping closer to me. “Like nothing happened, do you know what it is like to sit in a living room with your mother?”

“I do,” I answered, “we sort of do that a lot since we live together.”

“That’s not what I meant,” she countered and I knew my jokes wouldn’t work. “After five minutes she ran out of bullshit to ask me.”

“I’m sorry you ran over here,” I said, taking a step forward.

“Do you even like me?” She asked, pushing against my chest with her hand. It stopped me from wrapping her into a hug to try and calm her down.

“Yeah, I do,” I answered, wanting to step away now that she had her hand resting on my chest. I could feel my heart racing and I knew she could feel it too. The answer felt like a lie, but I knew that before Luke I really did like Ally. I felt good when I was around her and I hated not seeing the smile that I liked and that I was hurting her. That I would keep hurting her if I didn’t end things right here, until I got my head sorted out.

“I like you too,” she said letting her hand drop to her side. Her voice cracked and I heard her sniffle. She let me wrap her into a hug and I could feel her when she began to cry. Looking out across the yard I sighed when I saw Luke standing by the treeline on the trail that led to where he took me the second time we kissed.

“Ally,” I said breaking the hug. My shirt was wet where her tears collected and my stomach turned when I saw her reach up and wipe away her own tears. If I was any sort of boyfriend I would have wiped them away for her. If I was any sort of boyfriend I wouldn’t have made her cry to begin with. “I think we need a break.”

“What?” She asked, shrugging out of my grasp.

“I’m not the best boyfriend right now,” I said, my voice falling to a whisper not wanting Luke to overhear what I was telling her.

“A break,” she repeated looking at me. “What do you mean a break?”

“Until I get my head right,” I said, shaking my head. “I’ve…”

“Don’t you dare!” She yelled crossing her arms. “What is wrong with you?”

“I was about to tell you!” I yelled, taking a step back. “You’re fine, it’s me I’m fucking everything up.”

“At least we can agree on that,” she said shouldering past me. “If you need a break, fine, we’re on a break.”

“Ally,” I groaned, turning to follow her.

“No, Jackson,” she said, “You’re acting so weird, first with Luke Clarke, I mean you don’t even save a seat for Connor, but you do a church loser.”

“Please,” I said, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. “Luke isn’t that bad.”

“I don’t want to hear it,” she said holding up her hand. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” I said as she whirled and ran from the yard. I stood and waited until I heard her car start and back out of the driveway before I turned and walked to the treeline where I saw Luke.

“I didn’t mean to be here to see that,” he said stepping out from behind the bushes. “I heard yelling and thought you might want to talk after she left.”

“I don’t want to talk,” I said, glancing over my shoulder half expecting to hear Mom calling out to me. I doubted the space Ally wanted really helped keep Mom from overhearing most of the fight.

“Alright,” he said as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“Alright?” I asked, my voice rising. “What do you mean, alright, it is never just alright and nothing with you.”

“I like to change things up,” he answered shrugging. “You keep being stubborn about not talking, so I decided to just let you.”

“Fuck you,” I said feeling my face flush. “Maybe it would be best if we stopped talking, I mean my whole life has decided to fuck me over lately.”

“And I’m to blame for that?” He asked and I wanted to shove him back into the treeline so I didn’t have to see him smirking at me.

“Well you certainly aren’t helping,” I answered, “calling Mom by her name in front of Ally, and all that.”

“Your mom told me to call her Grace,” he countered biting his bottom lip to keep from smiling.

“You know damn well what you’re doing,” I said reaching up and grabbing him. “You’re driving me crazy.”

“Do you want me to stop?” He asked, his smile fading as he studied me. “Do you want us to stop this?”

“No,” I answered, “do you?”

“Yes,” he said, frowning. “I want to stop, I’ve wanted to stop since the time I first kissed you and you held my hand the whole way home.”

“Then why haven’t you?” I asked, taking a half step forward ready to grab him if he tried to turn and leave me standing in my own yard alone.

“I can’t,” he said as he placed his hands on my sides just above my hips. “I just don’t want to like you, but I do.”

“I am a likeable fucker,” I offered and smiled when he laughed.

“I wouldn’t go that far,” he countered, still holding me.

When his grip tightened on my sides, he let out a slow sigh and wrapped me into a hug. It was difficult to rein in all of the thoughts knocking around inside my head. I just broke up with a girl. A girl that I already saw myself going to prom with. A girl that I didn’t look past to see what else was out there and wanting me. Then to top all of that off, I was okay with that. Mostly because Luke seemed to eclipse everything that I thought I liked in Ally. That I would like in Ally if he wasn’t here in my yard hugging me against him. I was just now starting to realize how strange all of this should be for me.

“What are you thinking?” I asked, inhaling deeply attempting to calm myself.

“That Mom will be in a fit if I don’t get home soon,” he answered, stepping out of the hug.

“That it?” I asked, trying not to laugh. “Momma’s boy?”

“Shut up,” he said quickly kissing me on the lips as he reached down and grabbed my hand. “I better go, we have school tomorrow.”

“Don’t remind me,” I groaned letting his hand slip from mine.

“See you tomorrow,” he said rolling his eyes. “You’ll do alright, I don’t think Ally is angry enough to kill you.”

“Yeah, you don’t know girls,” I argued and he laughed as he turned and stepped into the darkness of the forest.

I listened to the frogs and the crickets, watching the lightning bugs for a couple of minutes. I knew that waiting inside the house was cold fast food and a mother fussing around the house wanting to talk to me. Finally giving in to the inevitable I walked around the corner of our house and up the steps to the front door. When I opened it, Mom looked over her shoulder at me, dropping the paper she was reading onto the coffee table.

“I warmed up your food,” she said, offering me a small smile. “Alison didn’t sound too happy out there, are you okay?”

“We broke up,” I answered as she slid her reading glasses off her nose. She closed them and slid them onto the coffee table as well.

“I’m sorry,” she offered, patting me on the arm as I walked around the back of the couch and into the kitchen. For a moment I thought I was getting off easy, but as I pulled a chair out to sit at my plate of food I heard her stand up and begin walking my way.

“I’m fine,” I said after taking a huge bite out of my burger. The middle of it was still scalding hot and I had to bounce it around the inside of my mouth until it cooled enough to chew. Laughing, she took the seat next to me shaking her head.

“I just got finished warming it up,” she added, wrinkling her nose. “I’m sorry your last year of high school has started out so rocky.”

“It’s not your fault,” I countered before taking a drink of the chilled lemonade she had put beside my plate.

“Maybe if I didn’t make you do the park thing,” she said crossing her arms on the table. “You could have focused on your swimming the last few weeks, Rick said you’ve been tired and distracted.”

“It still wouldn’t have helped anything,” I said, taking a careful second bite of my burger.

“I know,” she said rolling her eyes. “That college, you’ll show them one day how good you are.”

“If I’m even good enough for whatever their names are,” I said shoving a limp fry into my mouth.

“Well I believe in you,” she said. “I am prepared to take you as far as you want to go, so no matter what happens tomorrow, try to remember that.”

“Why the sudden interest in my swimming?” I asked, popping another fry into my mouth.

“I think I’m starting to feel the empty nest already,” she answered looking around the dimly lit kitchen. “By this time next year you’ll be in college.”

“Mom,” I groaned, taking a drink of my lemonade. “Don’t get mushy on me I can barely get down these limp fries.”

“Well fine,” she said smiling. “Are you okay, about Alison though? I mean really, we’ve never talked girls before.”

“And I don’t want to start talking to you about girls,” I added leaning back in my chair. “You’re a girl you’d just take their side.”

“Not when it comes to my son,” she argued, reaching over and slapping me on the shoulder. “None of them are good enough anyway.”

“Are you really going to come with me tomorrow for my tryouts?” I asked thankful that she gave up on talking about Ally so easily and all I had to suffer through was blushing at Mom’s sudden interest in my life. I knew she didn’t really like any of the girls I dated, except maybe for Lily, but Lily and I didn’t date long enough to really count.

“Yes, unless that will make you nervous,” she said and I could already tell that she would be disappointed if I told her that it would. Mom and Dad were both good at coming to the important meets, like the regional qualifying, then championships. Stuff like those, but they were both too busy to be bench parents. It bothered me when I was younger, but Rick, Derek, and Toby distracted me from being too disappointed.

“No, I want you to come,” I answered smiling as I took my last bite of my burger.

“Okay then,” she said smiling as she took my empty plate and glass.

“Oh,” I said, swallowing quickly before she could stand up and walk over to the dishwasher. “Luke won’t ask, but he wants to tag along tomorrow.”

“I don’t know about that, Jackson,” Mom said leaning back into her chair, seeming to study me. I felt my face flush all over again and I knew it was stupid of me to ask Mom about Luke. To even bring him up and show her that I was remotely interested in wanting him to really tag along. She probably expected me to ask if Derek and Toby to come, Luke probably threw her off enough to not say no to me immediately. “I don’t know if that would annoy the Garrisons tomorrow.”

“If that annoys them, I’d hate to see how they put up with me,” I countered, smirking when she laughed and shook her head.

“Good point, but I’ll let you decide,” she said as she stood from the kitchen table. “If you want him to come tell him to be at the house no later than four.”

“Okay,” I said, “I need to go write an English paper before it gets too late.”

“Goodnight honey,” she said as she walked to the kitchen sink.

“Goodnight,” I said and I walked around the corner and bounded up the stairs finally feeling free enough to relax. I ignored the English paper, hoping I could get the stupid thing done before Friday. Instead I took a quick shower, trying not to think about Alison Welker, the Garrisons, or the possibility that tomorrow I would either be a swimmer or just the boy playing pretend at his local YMCA.