Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
Walls - 14. August 2015
“CJ! Ozzie!” Ajax wrapped his arms around each of the guys, hugging them while holding the door open with a foot for them to enter the building. “It’s so good to have my favorite tenants back in town.”
Liz and Ritchie looked at each other and started giggling. “Does this happen everywhere you go, big brother?” the girl asked. “Do people always shout both your names out when they see you?”
“Hush, Liz. It’s CJ who gets recognized all the time. Ajax happens to be a friend so I got included today. Mate, this is my sister, Liz, and the young stud’s CJ’s brother, Ritchie. Guys, Ajax’s our favorite doorman here.”
“Welcome to our building, Liz, Ritchie.” Ajax tipped his cap in the direction of the new arrivals, and shook hands with them. “I hear it’s the first time in New York City for both of you. Is that right?”
Liz looked at the handsome, dark-haired young man and smiled. “It’s my first time in the United States. I’ve been in country for a month and this is the last stop of my trip.”
“You’re headed back to Australia after this weekend?”
“Unfortunately! I fly out on Sunday.” The girl was definitely flirting with the Greek stud and CJ had to stop himself from chuckling.
“It’s my brother’s first time here too, Ajax. You’ll be seeing more of him in the future since he’s now living with me and the dads in Washington. Are we on for dinner tomorrow night? Is your girlfriend joining us?” CJ noticed a look of disappointment on Liz’s face when he mentioned the girlfriend.
“Yes and yes. Chipper texted me to let me know he and his sister are arriving later this afternoon. He’s coming straight here from the airport while Cristina heads to her place. I already told him we’re on for tomorrow night. Marina will be here after she gets out of work and I’ll bring clothes to change into when I’m done. I’m hoping I can shower at your place.”
“Too easy, mate. You know you’re always welcome up there when we’re in town.” Owen hitched his overnight bag up on a shoulder, took one of his sister’s suitcases, and started walking towards the elevator while CJ grabbed Liz’s other bag. “Come on, guys. Let’s go drop off this stuff and then we’ll go for a walk around Central Park. We’ll save the major sightseeing for tomorrow and Saturday. But I think you need to start the visit with a ride around the park in a horse-drawn carriage.”
Ritchie’s eyes darted everywhere, looking at the details of the building’s lobby. “Are Chipper and Cristina staying here also?”
“Chipper is. We’re giving Liz the room Chipper and I use when we’re here with the dads. You get to share the big one with him. And you better not molest him, can’t have my brother and my friend fooling around.”
“Yuck! Not interested, CJ. Now, if it was Cristina I was sharing a room with…”
“Asshole!”
• • •
The city's ambient noises always seemed to disappear whenever CJ was in Central Park. The blaring horns of cars, the shouts of children playing, and all the other sounds which made up what he always thought of as New York City’s serenade were eclipsed by the clippity-clop of horse hooves on the pavement. The hansom cab ride was one of his favorite things to do and he’d come to recognize a couple of the drivers by sight over the past two years.
“That’s where the dinosaur displays are.” CJ pointed at the American Museum of Natural History as they rode past it. “If we have time we’ll stop by. But I think there’s a lot of stuff you find in New York and nowhere else I’d like you guys to see first.”
Ritchie stopped swiveling his head from side to side for a moment. “What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?”
“I don’t know, bro. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?” CJ was by now used to playing the straight man for his brother. All through their road trip and afterwards in Washington, Ritchie had spouted off silly jokes and bad puns.
“A thesaurus!”
This one earned him groans from his brother and Owen, and giggles from Liz. Their complaining was interrupted by CJ’s phone chiming. He retrieved it from his pocket, looked at the screen and smiled. “Chipper and Cristina just landed. He’s taking a cab to the apartment and she’s headed to her place in the Village. I’m warning you, he acting the same way he did last summer after his time in Argentina. His entire message’s in Spanish.”
“Great! I’m the only one who won’t understand anything!” Liz complained.
“Don’t worry about it, Liz. Your brother and I will have him speaking normal in no time at all.”
• • •
“Che!” CJ’s greeting died after the first word when they walked in the apartment and he saw Chipper. “Dude! What the fuck? Ooops, sorry, Liz. What the heck, Chipper? Last year it was bleached hair and a man bun, and this year you show up with a mohawk?”
“You like?” Chipper bent his head and rubbed the short strip of hair running down the middle of his scalp. “I was gonna leave it long and spike it but decided it was too much work. Hi, Liz! I’m Chipper.”
“Hi… I like your haircut.”
“Hey, Chipper, I like it too. Maybe I’ll get one when my hair grows back.” Ritchie ran a hand over the stubble on his head while giggling.
“Yeah, like, what the hell’s up with all of you? I thought I’d have the shortest do this year but I see I was wrong.”
Liz beamed when the lack of hair on her three traveling companions came up. “Don’t they look great? Since I lost mine thanks to chemo, the three of them decided to match me. You should have seen my surprise when CJ and Ozzie showed up at the airport in Miami with no hair.”
While CJ went to the kitchen to get everyone something to drink, Liz sat on the couch next to Chipper. She asked questions about Argentina and about Cristina and then requested he play something for them. With the group settled, sodas and water bottles in hand, Chipper picked up the guitar he’d placed on the floor when he’d stood to greet his friends. He strummed a few cords and started humming a tune CJ didn’t recognize. “What’s the song?”
“It’s ‘The Best is Yet to Come.’ Remember how last year I spent the summer playing at a coffee shop? Well, I went back there when I first got to Buenos Aires and some guy asked me if I was interested in making some money playing at a jazz club.”
“Did you?”
“Did I ever!” Chipper’s enthusiasm had him slapping the guitar with his open palm a couple of times. “I had to learn a bunch of new stuff, most of it old songs like the one I was just playing. I mean ancient stuff, guys. That song has been recorded a bunch of times but the most famous version’s by Frank Sinatra in the early 1960s!”
“I like it.” Liz smiled and sat on an armchair across from Chipper. “Can you sing it?”
“Yeah, sure, but I gotta warn you my voice’s not as good as our friend Thiago’s. And it would sound better with a keyboard. I need to look into getting one of those. Betcha Doc would rather have me banging away at piano keys instead of my drums!”
“What are we doing tonight, CJ?” Ritchie had sat quietly while Chipper performed a handful of songs, earning enthusiastic applause from his friends during the impromptu concert.
“Ummm, haven’t thought about it. Anything you want to do?”
“Can we get into the Empire State Building at night?”
“That’s a great idea, bro! Ozzie and I have never been there after dark. I need a shower before we go out again. You guys think we can get out of here in about an hour? We’ll do plenty of walking tomorrow. We’ll cab it tonight. Lots of restaurants in the midtown area. We’ll eat dinner while we’re out.”
• • •
The following morning CJ was up early, and after throwing on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, walked a couple of blocks to pick up juice, milk, fresh bagels, and cream cheese. He didn’t feel like cooking and thought Liz and his brother would prefer a quick breakfast and more time sightseeing.
“Where are we going first?” Ritchie was showered and dressed by the time CJ returned and the kid was now pushing to get out of the apartment. “Can we ride the subway? Is it like the one in DC? Or are the stories about it being dangerous down there true?”
Chipper winked at CJ and spoke with a serious tone. “It’s safe except for the giant alligators…”
“WHAT?”
Chipper’s comment elicited groans from CJ and Owen, and bewildered looks from Liz and Ritchie. “Yeah, you know, people used to buy baby gators as pets and when they started getting big they flushed them down the toilet. The gators settled in the sewers but every now and then they make their way to the subway stations. I think it’s when they get hungry and―”
“Shut up, Chipper. Don’t believe a word he says, guys. He’s full of crap.” CJ emphasized his comment by punching his friend.
“Nope. The gators are the ones full of crap. They do live in the sewers after all…”
They rode the subway to Bowling Green Station, crossed Battery Park, and boarded the ferry to the Statue of Liberty. CJ and Owen spent much of the time exchanging glances and smiles, delighted in the way their siblings interacted and marveled at the sight of the giant lady in the harbor.
After their visit to the National Monument, they walked to the 9/11 Memorial and as he’d done during his previous two visits, CJ had to step aside and take time to wipe away tears and compose himself. They bought hot dogs from a street vendor near the entrance to the Brooklyn Bridge and then spent time with Cristina in the Village, all of them returning to the apartment together to shower and change before heading out to dinner.
“G’day. Abelló, reservations for eight?” Owen stood by the hostess stand as the woman behind it stared him up and down.
“Yes, sir. We’ll have your table ready in a minute, Mr. Abelló.”
“Yeah, see, I’m not Mr. Abelló.” A smirking Owen pointed at CJ. “That’s Mr. Abelló. He’s my boyfriend and likes to hear his name called out so we always use it when we make reservations.”
“Hey! Stop that, Ozzie. Don’t listen to him, ma’am. He’s full of it.”
“Ajax was right, you guys are a blast.” Marina followed the hostess, sidling up next to CJ, while Ajax and Chipper whispered to each other while walking ahead of them. “Ever since he spent the night at your place I’ve been hearing about you guys and wanting to meet you. I was sooo jealous when he told me what a great time he had with you and your friends.”
CJ was uncertain how much the woman had been told. “Ummm, he told you about that night?”
“Oh, yeah. He told me everything!”
CJ looked at the beautiful girl, wondering what Ajax had told his girlfriend. “Everything?”
“Yup.” She allowed CJ to pull back a chair for her to sit on, winked at him, and patted the one next to hers for him to sit. “Sounded like you boys had a hot time. I was so jealous I wasn’t involved. But I’m hoping to make up for it this weekend. I know you and Ozzie are off limits, but we’re going to steal Chipper away from you guys tomorrow so he can spend the day with us.”
The next morning, Chipper begged off from sightseeing, claiming he had made plans with friends but would meet the DC crowd later in the day. CJ and Owen led their siblings towards Central Park, turning south on Fifth Avenue. After stopping for breakfast, the four strolled towards St. Patrick’s Cathedral where Liz asked for a little time alone so she could pray in the Lady Chapel at the back of the church.
Once she’d come outside, they stood on the steps of the church, watching the crowds jostling their way along Fifth Avenue. CJ had taken to wearing the Rolex his dads had gifted him and now glanced at it every few minutes.
“CJ!” Sean’s shout made the four Washington visitors turn towards him.
“Here we go again!” Owen groused while rolling his eyes. He hugged Ethan and Sean before stepping aside to allow his boyfriend to repeat the greeting. “We bloody told you guys to meet us here, not to announce who we are to everybody.”
“Quit complaining, Aussie. You love the attention your boyfriend gets.” Sean glanced at Liz and Ritchie waiting on the side and extended his hand to shake. “Hi guys, I’m Sean and that’s Ethan. We’ve heard a lot about you two. It’s good to have you in New York.”
“Nice to meet you, Liz.” Ethan shook hands with the girl before turning his attention to CJ’s brother and smirking. “Good to see you again, Ritchie. You still wanting to beat me up?”
“Nah, we’re cool. CJ told me you were alright. But you better don’t mess with my brothers.”
“I promise, I promise.” With his arm around the boy, Ethan steered the group towards the corner and waited for the traffic light to change. “So, Sean and I want to buy you guys lunch. How about the ice rink? Does that work?”
“Is the Ice Rink a restaurant?” Liz asked.
“You’ve seen it on TV, Liz. It’s the ice skating place in front of the giant Christmas tree they show every year. In summer it’s a restaurant.” Owen strolled next to his sister towards Rockefeller Plaza while CJ, Ritchie, and Sean walked behind them.
“Is Ethan paying you to have sex with him?” Ritchie’s whisper to Sean made the redhead and CJ stop and stare at the boy.
“What the fuck, bro? What type of question’s that?” CJ outrage was met with chuckles from Sean and downcast eyes from Ritchie.
“No he’s not, Ritchie. What made you ask me that?”
“Sorry… I just wanted to know. Patrick told me that’s what you did for work.”
Sean winked at CJ and placed a hand on Ritchie’s shoulder, holding him back somewhat so the three of them wouldn’t be overheard by their companions. “I used to, buddy. But I don’t anymore. I have two jobs now. One as a bartender and the other one as a personal trainer. Ethan and I are friends and since he’s been working at his dad’s law firm this summer, we’ve been spending time together. But it’s because we get along, not because he’s paying me.”
“Oh… okay… sorry…”
CJ insisted his brother sit next to him when they were shown to their table and while Sean and Ethan peppered Liz with questions about life in Australia, her medical issues, and her time in the United States, he spoke in hushed tones to Ritchie. “Bro, you can’t just ask questions like that when you first meet people.”
“Sorry… It’s just… I never met a prostitute before. I was curious.”
“Yeah well, that’s a word we might not want to shout. Sean’s a good guy. He’s never hidden what he used to do for a living. And I’m sure he’ll talk about it with you all you want. One of the things I loved about him from the day I met him was his honesty. But sometimes it’s not what you say but when, where, and how.”
“I’m sorry…” Ritchie appeared ready to cry when he mumbled the words. “Are you upset with me?”
“Nope. Not upset at all.” CJ gave his brother a gentle sideways hug. “Asking questions about things you don’t know or understand is the best way to learn. Never stop. But you’re going to meet a lot of different guys living with us. You already know most of my friends are straight but there’s going to be plenty of gay people around also.”
“I know that! I don’t care.”
“Of course you don’t. But not everyone’s as smart or accepting as you. There are some things better not discussed in public. Sean never hurt anyone when he was working as an escort―that’s what they’re called, by the way―but some people look down on guys like him anyway. So it’s better to talk about those things in private.”
Lunch over, Sean and Ethan stuck with their friends from Washington when they walked over to Times Square. They took pictures in front of the giant electronic billboards, gawked at the theatre marquees, and stopped at a couple of touristy stores so Liz could buy souvenirs.
“Is this the one you have at your house?” Liz held a glass miniature of the Chrysler Building in front of CJ, who’d stuck by her side when they entered the store.
“Yeah, I love the Art Deco design, it’s my favorite building in New York.”
“You really like this city, don’t you? My brother’s always raving about your trips here and to Miami when he e-mails me.”
“I do, Liz. I do like New York. I mean, I love Miami and Washington too but there’s something special about this place. People can be rude and the city can be dirty at times, but there’s a special energy to the place that gets me going.”
The girl looked at him and smiled. “Ozzie’s changed a lot in the time he’s been over here. He used to dislike the crowds and pace of Sydney when he was at uni. He’d escape back to the Hunter whenever he could. But not anymore. Instead of being the farm boy who left Australia, he’s turned into a city boy. You’ve had a lot to do with that, you know?”
“Ummm, is that a good thing or a bad one?”
“Neither, silly, it’s just a fact. But maybe, in the long run, I think it’s good for him. He may be studying environmental law because he was never going to be like Spencer. That one wants to get back to the vineyards as soon as possible and spend his life making wine. You’ve shown my big brother another world. One he likes and I can see he fits in. Thank you.”
“Ozzie may be a farm boy as you call him, but he’s settled in well. At first he was a pain, like when we went to that banquet last year. He was nervous about meeting famous people. But he’s relaxed a lot. And I’m real glad he’s told you he’s enjoying himself. I love the country but I’m an urban kid at heart. Give me a big city and I’ll make it my playground.
“I’m not sure I’ve done much, though. My dads are just as responsible. They’ve insisted on including Owen in most of our trips. And you saw how much my grandparents like him too.”
“That makes it easier for him. Not everyone gets along with their in-laws.”
“He ain’t my husband, Liz. You gotta stop that.” CJ’s tone was gentle. He disliked people marrying him and Owen off, but it’d become such a common thing his replies lacked a lot of conviction. “No in-laws, okay?”
“Yeah, sure, whatever. I have a feeling if I live long enough, I’m going to be seeing a lot of you in the future.”
Liz wasn’t too keen on attending a baseball game when they’d planned the trip to New York so CJ promised Ritchie they would catch the Yankees or Mets the next time they came up. Instead, that Saturday evening they returned to Times Square and saw the performance of The Book of Mormon at the Eugene O’Neill Theatre.
After the play, Chipper insisted the girl’s New York experience wouldn’t be complete without an after-theatre late supper at the Carnegie Deli. Located on Seventh Avenue across from Carnegie Hall, the restaurant was famous for its pastrami and the multitude of pictures of Broadway stars hanging on the walls. “The sandwiches are gargantuan―”
“Nice quarter word, Chipper!”
“Screw you, CJ. Anyway, they’re really, really, big. I suggest we order three Woody Allens. That’s half pastrami and half corned beef. We can share and that way you get both tastes.”
“I don’t know any of these people!” Ritchie’s complaint while studying the framed images was echoed by Liz.
“Yeah, you do.” Chipper stared at the wall by their table and then shook his head. “Okay, maybe not in this section. But there’s plenty of TV and movie stars who’ve appeared on Broadway and have their pics up on the wall. I’m sure you’d recognize some.”
“Don’t worry about it, Chipper. I don’t care if I don’t know any of them, this is still a great place to end my trip.” Liz smiled while rubbing the guy’s upper arm. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet you before this weekend. Maybe you’ll come to Australia next time CJ and Ozzie visit? And you,” she added, pointing at Ritchie, “you definitely have to come with them.”
“I will! But it’s up to the two of them and Mr. A and the Captain. It’s expensive to fly to Australia, isn’t it?”
“Don’t worry about that, bro. If the dads are okay with it, I’ll take you with me next time I go.” CJ turned to Liz after reassuring his brother. “But I’m not sure when that’ll be, Liz.”
“Why don’t you come spend your birthday and Christmas with us again? I mean, my brother will be coming home―”
“Actually, about that. I haven’t told our parents yet but I won’t be going home over the holidays.” Ozzie grimaced at the same time his sister looked surprised.
“What do you mean you’re not coming home? What are you going to do over Christmas?”
“I don’t know yet. CJ says it’s still a secret and won’t tell me.”
“Can you tell me, CJ? Am I included?” Ritchie stared at his brother, a worried look on his face.
“What about me?” Chipper asked. “Should I not make plans to visit my father this year? Please tell me I don’t have to go to Tampa.”
“Ozzie, you have a big damn mouth! I told you I needed to talk to the dads before making actual plans. Ritchie, if we do anything, you’re definitely included. You too, Chipper. See, Liz, I turn eighteen this year and want to do something a little different. I’m just trying to figure out if I can afford it and if the dads will give me their permission. I’m asking them when we get back to Washington. If they say no, Australia will be my next choice.”
The conversation stopped when Owen’s phone chimed indicating a text message. His face showed surprise and then he chuckled when he opened it. “It’s from Spence, Liz.”
“And what does our brother have to say? He’s still picking me up at the airport, right?”
“Doesn’t say anything about that. Here, take a look. He sent a picture of him with his new workout buddy at the gym.”
“Ohhh, cute, very cute. Why does he look familiar?”
Owen passed the phone around so everyone could see his brother Spencer, wearing a tank top and shorts next to a very good looking young guy dressed the same way. “Our dear brother says that’s Tyson Hill’s brother, Scott. He works at Casa Nostra!”
“Isn’t that the restaurant we went to for your farewell meal in Sydney?” CJ asked.
“It is, mate. I can’t believe Tyson Hill’s brother works there. Oh, follow up message. Spencer says he went to try and convince the restaurant owners to carry Liston wines and met Scott then. He’ll introduce us next time we’re in Sydney.”
The next morning, the guys all rode to the airport with Liz before catching the train back home to Washington. Tears and laughter mingled amongst promises of renewed social media contact and an in-person reunion as soon as possible. Ritchie and Liz had become close over the past month and their goodbye hug left CJ and Owen beaming. They’d talked about it the previous night after going to bed: their siblings had bonded and both were thrilled.
On the way to DC, Owen was quiet and looked sad until CJ placed his head on the Aussie’s shoulder. “She’s doing great, Ozzie. And I’m pretty sure this trip did a lot of good. She looked happy even if at the same time she was sad to leave. We’ll see her soon, babe.”
• • •
A little over a week after returning from New York, CJ and Ritchie had appointments with Dr. Matt Calhoun. The dads wanted the younger boy to get the same type of comprehensive annual physical CJ had been subjected to since his move to the nation’s capital.
“Hi, Helen, you’re looking beautiful, as usual.” CJ smiled at Chatri’s wife, who worked as the head nurse in the office. “Brought you guys a new victim. This is my brother, Ritchie.”
“Hi, Ritchie! I’ll ignore your brother’s victim comment. It’s good to finally meet you, I’ve heard a lot about you.” The woman turned to CJ with her hands on her hips and sneered at him. “And for the record, Mr. Abelló, I’m not stupid. Of course he’s your brother! I can read an appointment schedule and figure out which patients are coming in.”
CJ chuckled and looked at his brother. “Helen used to be a real sweet girl, Ritchie. Then she married Chatri and his awful sarcasm’s rubbing off on her.”
“I’m telling him you said that! And stop picking on an expectant mother. Aggravation’s not good for the baby.”
“WHAT?”
Ritchie giggled as he was shown into one of the examination rooms. “I think she means she’s pregnant, CJ.”
“Oh, wow! That’s great news. Congratulations! How did this happen?”
“Really, CJ? You want me to explain how I got pregnant? In you go, Ritchie. I’ll be back in a minute. We’re shorthanded today so our office manager’s putting his nursing skills to work. I’ll take care of you while Levi deals with your brother. And, CJ, you better call my husband. He’s complaining about not seeing you again. Maybe you and your boyfriend can come over for dinner one night?”
Levi Olken had risen from being a registered nurse working for Dr. Prescott Harding to his current position as office manager for Harding & Calhoun. CJ had heard the story about how the man had served in his native country’s army and become disillusioned with the lack of improvement in Israeli-Palestinian relations. He’d chosen to reclaim his US citizenship―his parents were both Americans―and moved to Washington.
“Hey, CJ, long time, buddy. How’s life treating you?”
“Pretty good. Go introduce yourself to my brother when you get done with me. Helen stuck him in another room.”
“I will, I will. Uncross your legs while I take your blood pressure. Matt mentioned your brother had just moved up here permanently. How’s that going?”
“Great so far, but it’s only been a few weeks. Ozzie’s sister flew to Miami to visit the US for a month so we all drove up together and did the tourist thing at Disney World and a few other places.”
“Blood pressure and pulse are excellent. So, no traveling to Australia this year? How are you and your boyfriend doing? Temperature’s normal too.”
“Of course it’s all normal, I ain’t even had a cold since my last physical. Ozzie’s great. He’s been a little down since his sister left. But once school starts he’ll be too busy to mope around. What about you, got a boyfriend yet? You’re too hot to be single.” CJ thought Levi had stereotypical Middle Eastern good looks. Dark hair and eyes, olive complexion, and a furry chest. Even his prominent nose looked good on him.
“Stop flirting. You’re taken. Shouldn’t distract me when I have a needle in my hand and I’m about to stick you.” Levi wiped the spot he’d selected to prick with an alcohol swab and wiped it dry with a gauze square. “Anyway, still single. But I spent time in Israel this summer and found out the Palestinian kid I grew up with is gay. Always had a crush on him but I thought he was straight so never thought of him as anything but a friend.”
“So is this someone you could get serious with?”
“Maybe… Sit still. But don’t hold your breath, he’s almost 6,000 miles away. I’m Jewish and he’s Christian, and his family doesn’t know he likes men. Not like we can start dating or anything.”
“Yeah? Ozzie was 10,000 miles away when I met him and look what happened. Is he coming to visit you?”
“We’re talking about it.” He handed CJ a small plastic jar and pointed at the door. “We need a urine sample. Go to the bathroom and pee in that. We’ll see what happens but he may come visit around the end of the year.”
“You’ll have to let me know if he does. I’d like to meet this guy. Maybe Ozzie and I can go out with you guys while he’s in town. What’s his name, anyway?”
“Ezra. When you get back, take off your clothes. You can keep your underwear on. Pres and Matt both want to see ya.”
“Perverts!” CJ was still laughing when Levi walked out shaking his head.
• • •
“I’m so glad there are no females in this house or next door. Could you imagine a woman having to sit through dinner with us and listening to the conversation?” Brett’s chuckle made César smile.
“Which one, Jarhead? The part about the nuts or the straps?”
CJ, with Ritchie as his assistant, had cooked dinner to celebrate his dads and uncles’ second wedding anniversary. Tom and JP returned home when César and Brett headed to their bedroom while the younger crowd remained behind in the game room.
“Both! I thought I was going to lose it when Ritchie started talking about how Doc manhandled his balls during his physical. I’ve got a feeling the boy’s going to enjoy feeling for bumps on a regular basis. Who’d thunk checking yourself for testicular cancer could bring a smile to a kid’s face?”
“Like you don’t smile when I play with your balls. I do give CJ points for originality. He gives us Nasty Pig jockstraps for our cotton anniversary and kept a straight face while we opened the packages.”
“I bet you the little fucker was laughing his ass off when he bought them and when he gave them to us. Hey, at least he and Ritchie both got a clean bill of health from Matt.”
“Yeah, in the long run that’s all that matters. As long as our kids are healthy, I’m happy.”
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