CRYSTALLINE - 42. EPILOGUE

In a bath house on Oxford street, a new employee was being shown the ropes.

“When they pay their admission fee, you give them one of these wrist bands, a towel and ask them to read the house rules on the wall there. Got that?”

“Seems pretty simple”

“Ok then, you’re on duty as of now. I’ll be in the back doing paperwork, yell out if any problems”

“Yes, I will and thank you for the opportunity”

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About an hour later the owner came out and asked the new starter “Everything ok”

“Sure, no problems, but can I ask you something?”

“Sure, what is it?”

“When I’m not on official duty, is it all right if I offer my services freelance, to the customers?”

“You mean for sex?”

“Yes, this is listed as a licensed, sex on premises venue”

“That means the customers are permitted to have sex with each other, not pay for it. If I allow that then I would be running a brothel and that is not included in my licence. I could be put out of business if the licensing police find out”

“Ok, sorry, I just misunderstood the meaning of, sex on premises”

“You’ll learn, I’m glad you asked first”

“I’m going out for coffee, can I bring something back for you?”

“Thanks, a long black would be great”

***

When the owner returned with the coffee he overheard “Sorry I’m not allowed to, house rules. But I can give you my number and we can arrange something later”

He waited until the customer left, then asked “Was that what I think it was?”

“If you mean was I arranging to meet a client later, then yes. Is that within the house rules?”

“Sure, off these premises you make the rules”

“Do you do this often?”

“I haven’t for many months, while I was working at my last job, but here seems a good place to find clients. If you don’t mind”

“Ok with me. You seem to be a man of varied talents”

“Thank you and there is something else I do that may be suitable here to entertain the clients”

“By entertain, you mean what?”

“Oh not sex, I’ve been working up an act for some time and have become quite good at it”

“I’d like to hear about that, so when Frank comes in to relieve you, come back to my office and you can show me your act. It doesn’t involve animals or anything dangerous does it”

“No just me and a few props”

“Super, I’m looking forward to the performance”

***

The owner was impressed with the act and said he could try it the following night and if the customers liked it he would pay a performance fee on top of the hourly rate for attendant.

***

He started his act fully clothed and in an effort to convince his audience it was true magic and he was not hiding any trick props in his clothes he slowly removed his clothing.

When he ripped away his shirt, his audience gasped, not at a magic trick, but at his sculptured body. “And what’s in my shirt, you’re now wondering”

“A great set of pecs” was the reply.

Then he produced a pack of cards, did a few card tricks and said “Now I’m almost naked have I convinced you, this is really magic?”

“You could be hiding your tricks in your pants”

“You want me to remove my pants?”

“Yes” the whole audience called.

“Did you not hear my introduction? I am a magician, not a stripper”

“Go on, take em off”

“And what do you think you will discover, I’m really not hiding anything”

“Prove it”

“Ok, just for you” then he ripped off his pants in true stripper style. As he stood there in just, a well packed G string, he waved his arms around and produced a pack of condoms, which he threw into the audience and said. “Happy now, you’ve seen true magic”

“We’re beginning to enjoy the strip as much as the magic”

“Truly, I’ve nothing left to reveal” he replied as he pointed to his crotch.

Then holding his hands at chest height, he cupped them together, blew on his hands then out popped a condom and fell on the floor.

“Oops where did that come from, I was planning to use that one later tonight” The audience laughed. “Oh well let’s see if I can find another one”

Then another popped out and another and soon a steady stream of condoms was popping out of his cupped hands, until the floor was littered with about twenty condoms. He picked up one, pushed it into his G string and said “Now there’s enough for all”

He then bowed to his audience and said “Thank you, good night, you’ve been a wonderful audience”

But his audience did not applaud, instead they started a slow clap, so he turned his back to them, whipped off the G string, and threw a few plastic cock rings over his shoulder, into the audience.

Then he turned, covering his genitals with his hands. He then said to the audience “I need a volunteer” and almost everyone put up their hand. “Isn’t it amazing, when most magicians ask for volunteers nobody volunteers as they are in fear of losing an expensive watch, a ring or even a finger or two, depending on the trick to be performed. Yet with a naked man standing before you, at a sex club, I have everyone to choose from” He then scanned the audience and said “How about you with the red hair, what’s your name?”

“Blue they call me”

“I’ve not met anyone named Blue before”

“It’s what Aussies call people with red hair”

The magician looked puzzled, but said “Ok Blue I need your help”

Blue eagerly stood up and stepped forward.

“No you can stay there, I just need you to tell me your favourite colour”

“Red of course”

“Ok, red’s your favourite colour, so I’ll find something red for you” He fondled his genitals one hand at a time, using the other hand to make magic gestures. Then with both hands on his genitals, a blue billiard ball dropped from his hands. “Oh, my wizard must have misunderstood and thought you said blue. Let’s try again” A few more hand movements and a green ball dropped from his hands. “Damn, got it wrong again, but I only have two balls” the audience laughed.

“One more try” he said as he turned around, bent forward, reached behind, parted his butt cheeks and squeezed out a red ball.

The audience applauded and whistled loudly, as he turned to face them and took a bow.

*****