Needing some help!

[Arpeggio]

Okay, I have a stepsister whom I've been rather estranged from. I only ever see her at Christmas when I bring presents for her children. She has two children, both girls, with two different fathers. I got a call on Wednesday last week saying that the girls had been taken into protective custody because my stepsister took the oldest child to the emergency room and was so strung out that she couldn't give the nurse any information. Right now, the girls are staying with a foster family, but they rather place the child with family, so I went down to the court and filed a petition for emergency temporary custody. I had a house study done and a background/drug test which both passed, and the preliminary for court was set up for this coming Monday. All looked positive.

 

But then I get a call from their case worker saying that the father of the youngest child had stepped forward to take custody of her. She said that they couldn't release both of the girls to him because my stepsister is adamant that she wants nothing to do with him, so the girls might possibly be separated. I called the guy and talked to him a little bit, turns out he has never even seen his daughter physically and she doesn't know him at all. All in all, the caseworker told me that his rights superseded my rights, which I understand, but this guy is a piece of work. He has a felony in his background, probably for drug use, and he can't support the girls like I can.

 

I'm wondering if there is any chance that I can get both of the girls. I've looked up the laws but I keep getting different answers. I really need some guidance before Monday. They told me the only red flag that I have is that I failed to protect the girls because I knew my father and stepmother (who my stepsister and the girls lived with) had a history of drug abuse. In my defense, I didn't know where my stepsister was staying at, and every time I saw her, she was sober, so I just assumed she escaped like I did, but I don't know if my story will mean much. I know that the girl's fathers both failed to protect as well. 

 

Any thoughts?

Edited April 4, 2015 by Arpeggio

[DynoReads]

Unfortunately parental rights usually supersede the children's rights.

 

My best advice would be to talk to the biological father, let him know that you want to work with him. Try to get him to let you have custody in exchange for generous visitation with the youngest. This is a traumatic time for the girls and they need to be together. Going with someone who is essentially a stranger, even though he is her father, would be bad for the youngest. 

[JamesSavik]

Each states laws are a little different. You probably need an attorney.

 

And I mean it too because I hate attorneys and would never recommend using one  unless it were necessary.

 

Talk to some of your friends who may have had custody issues and see if they can recommend one that's not 100% shyster.

Edited April 4, 2015 by jamessavik

[Kitt]

never mind - bad advice

 

Sounded better in my head.

Edited April 5, 2015 by Kitt

[Graeme]

James has given you the best answer. I know in Australia (or at least Victoria) you'd have a decent chance because the courts here will look at the big picture and try to work out what's best for the child. In this case, keeping the siblings together would hopefully be enough to outweigh his parent rights, especially as he's never had anything to do with the child before now while you have.

[jor]

Where I live the court can appoint someone called a Gaurdian-ad-libim (I know I misspelled it), who is an adult that is to look out for the best interest of the child.  It sounds like you getting custody would be in the best interest of the child, so the Guardian would support your case.  And since the Guardian is an independent 3rd party, the court often pays attention to what they say.

[Dabeagle]

There is a wrinkle you may be able to take advantage of in the US, which I recently ran into. If the girls have been raised together, they will usually want someone to take them both and keep them together. Having a felony in your background doesn't preclude you from having custody of your kids, depending on what it was - for instance as a sex offender.

 

At worst you may be bale to provide a home to the older girl, to start. The county/state also has a vested interest in seeing the child with the parent for financial reasons. What you are doing is called kinship care, whose standards are lower than standard foster care, but you'd still receive some financial assistance from the state/county for doing so.

 

That natural parent has the legal upper hand, unless the child can be shown to be in imminent danger. Try to cultivate some kind of dialogue with him to allow the girls as much visitation as you can. If he has no other kids, he may very well decide it's a big pain to have one around full time and be amenable to giving you a guardianship.

 

Good luck, it's a good thing you're doing.

[mattie]

I don't have any advice for you, because i know nothing about this kind of stuff...i just wanted to say good luck, i hope everything works out for the girls, i don't think it's right for them to get split up

[Carlos Hazday]

Where I live the court can appoint someone called a Gaurdian-ad-libim (I know I misspelled it), who is an adult that is to look out for the best interest of the child.  It sounds like you getting custody would be in the best interest of the child, so the Guardian would support your case.  And since the Guardian is an independent 3rd party, the court often pays attention to what they say.

Guardian ad litem  we have them in Florida. I think they're usually an attorney who works to represent the best interest of the person they're assigned to

 

you need legal advice specific to your state. If you can't afford an attorney call a legal aid society, they may be able to help or guide you to an attorney willing to do pro bono work.

 

BEST OF LUCK!

Edited April 5, 2015 by Carlos Hazday

[JamesSavik]

Kentucky Legal Aid

[Ashi]

I wish you all the luck, Lacey.

[clochette]

I can't give you any advices for your situation here but I wish you the best Lacey *hugs*

[Arpeggio]

Thanks, I'll give an update after court today. 

[MrM]

Thanks, I'll give an update after court today. 

 

Thank you Lacey. We're all pulling for you, Sweetie.

[Lisa]

Hope it all went well today, Lacey.

[Arpeggio]

Well they placed another court hearing on May 11 so I don't get the girls today.

[Headstall]

Hang in there... you're doing a great thing by trying...

[Robert Rex]

Actually, the new court date is a good thing for you--gives you time to build a solid case on why you should get them!  And, gives you time to, if necessary, negotiate with the biological father.

Hang in there, get the help you need--and know we're all pulling for you.  You're making the best of a bad situation, and your care for nieces will make a difference.

You rock!

[MrM]

Well they placed another court hearing on May 11 so I don't get the girls today.

 

Stay strong, Darlin'. If it is meant to be then it will be.

[Celethiel]

my thoughts are... you need a hug....

[Kitt]

What Rex said!  And Cele is right too!