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    Mikiesboy
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Only Prompts - 5. Coward, Anal and Time - Prompt 500

Prompt 500 -Creative
Tag - First Line
“What took you so long?”

 

 

Coward, Anal and Time

 

What took you so long?

Why do I say that? So many possibilities aren’t there? So many permutations, it’s like asking, what is life?

Okay, so maybe it isn’t exactly like asking that, because there obviously can be reasons something took so long, or why you had taken so long. For example, the bus was late or the cake decorator had to mix up another batch of that special red you had to have. But still you have to admit there could be a myriad of reasons.

Good, well I’m glad we finally agree on something.

But there is time, isn’t there? Especially now, the way things are, there is time.

Funny how we mention time or talk about it so much—we waste time, run out of time, have lots of time and of course there is no time like the present. We would like to slow or stop time, there are no time limits (ha, but there are on us) but I digress, time heals all wounds and Einstein said, Time is an illusion. And while maybe time is all of those things, and likely it is endless, but for you and me it’s most definitely finite.

So we come back to my original question—what took you so long?

My, there’s no need to get upset, why would I accuse you of wasting what we have so much of? Look, really—don’t laugh. You sound a little hysterical. You did your best didn’t you?

Right, sorry doing—you are doing your best. Not your fault, your timing was off. Really now, you need to stop laughing. It isn’t remotely amusing to be honest.

That’s another thing, honesty.

Most people don’t know the meaning of the word—honest or honesty. It is a noble word to my mind and a noble deed if anyone ever is honest—humans aren’t very good at being it. And even if we are honest to each other, we certainly aren’t with ourselves. Geez, if you lied to me the way I do to myself I’d never speak to you again!

Have I told you my favourite quote about honesty? No? Noel Coward said it. Oh, well it’s this; “It's discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.”

Ha, that’s the basis for every Hollywood blockbuster don’t you think?

It’s why I prefer books. No, I’m not saying all books tell the truth. But why does Hollywood want to take the truth out of stories? Truth is stranger than fiction. That’s some honesty right there!

Okay, yes I know I’m babbling. Sorry, what did you say? Oh, okay, 34mm you say.

Ah, found it. Here you go.

Time remaining? Umm, about 43 minutes.

Well you can try and finish it or we could just go to bed. Well, yes I am more than aware you’re not gay, but do you see any women here? Have you for the past—how long have we been here?

Right, that long. A little anal never hurt anyone, I’m telling you. If you haven’t tried it, you should. Did I say that I would be top? No, I didn’t. Well you know what they say about assuming, don’t you? Okay, jesus don’t be so, so—anal! Since time is precious and honesty, is like so important, well I thought I’d try it with you. So to be perfectly honest, I’d like someone to hold me and I’d like to do the same as time runs out because you are taking-so-fucking-long.

Okay. Yes. Yes I’m sorry. I’m sure my constant chatter isn’t helping you fix that whatever it is. I can’t help it though. I didn’t think there’d just be the two of us left.

Me? Well, I’m the ship’s cook. Haha, yes the second cook. Oh for pity’s sake, more honesty? The cook’s mate, his boy, slave whatever you want to call it. So I was not too important unless dishes needed washing or the cook’s dick needed—.

Don’t want to picture that for eternity? No, neither did I, but it seems it was an unwritten thing, came under other duties as assigned. The real reason? Well after a while I was lonely I guess. The only out guy on a ship of how many? And hearing him tell me what I did was perfect, or felt good was helpful, ya know? It was something. I was still lonely though.

I’m sure there were others, but no one is gonna admit they like men, on a ship full of men and a few women. Why did I? I suppose because I wanted someone to hold too. But no one came forward to admit it, not in public nor was it whispered into my shell like.

Which one? The red laser thingy…okay… here you are. I’ll put it back, don’t worry. Shit—speaking of anal! There all put back in its 34mm space. It’ll be there the next time—oh fuck.

Oh. Oh, geez, 38 minutes.

 

No! No I am not. I don’t fucking cry. Who told you I do? Damnit I may be gay but I’m no … you have? I tried to muffle them into my pillow. Shit, I guess it doesn’t matter anymore does it? Sometimes I just feel so scared. I guess I feel us navy types … it’s funny isn’t it? That they still call us navy even though we are nowhere near water.

What now? The what? Wait I’ll see if I can find it. It won’t take long. I’m looking in the case, hold on. There it is. Here it is.

Look, I’m not tryin’ to rush you but the clock says, 17 minutes.

Fuck. That isn’t much time. I’m only thirty-four. And what have I done with my sad life? Nothing that’s what. No husband, no kids, no bestseller, no nothing. Who’s gonna remember me?

Is that supposed to make me feel better? And that’s the cruelest irony isn’t it? My name will be on a plaque with everyone on the ship’s manifest. They died in service to their planet. Just glad my name isn’t Gilligan. What kind of crazy person would name an interstellar ship that?

Time? Yes, it’s four minutes now. Are you gonna stop?

Please stop. Please just hold me. Please.

Thank you. I’m not so sca….

~ ~ ~

Thanks for reading. All mistakes are mine and I'm good at em, too!

Copyright © 2017 Mikiesboy; All Rights Reserved.
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On 05/22/2016 01:41 AM, Reader1810 said:

Hey tim

 

:huh::unsure::):gikkle::lol::P:lol::):):lol::) ....

 

:D:thumbup::thumbup: ... :worship:

Okay.. does this mean I took you through a whole bunch of different feelings and in the end you liked it? Or I left you speechless and it sucked so bad you didn't have the heart to tell me? Hmmm, I'll pick the first.

 

Thanks, Reader (i think)

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Hey tim
took me a while to work out what was going on. I think I managed in the end, and I liked the unspoken SciFi with the basic human fear of dying alone.

Edited by Timothy M.
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I loved it.Tim. The one-sided conversation was a little bit of brilliant, and your special wit shone through... the one we see in 'Farris and James'...
As amusing as it was, it struck a serious note. Isn't that what we all want... all need, when the lights go out... permanently or otherwise... to be held... and loved. Great job, buddy... cheers... Gary....

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I was a bit confused at first, but you slowly introduced elements of what was happening and painted a vivid picture. Not easily done with a monologue. Good job :)

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Well that was a twisted bit of fun. As with others it took a bit for me to catch on to what was truly happening. That brought a whole other of feelings to the tale. Very nicely done.

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Honestly, this is a difficult review to do. This is an art piece, and thus intended to be left open to interpretation, and possibly different takes over the course of follow-up readings.

 

I do think you have done the one-point conversation quite well, and you had me loving this moment:

 

"Most people don’t know the meaning of the word—honest or honesty. It is a noble word to my mind and a noble deed if anyone ever is honest—humans aren’t very good at being it. And even if we are honest to each other, we certainly aren’t with ourselves. Geez, if you lied to me the way I do to myself I’d never speak to you again!"

 

This is a fascinating exploration, and I'd like to see you do more prompt responses, if this is the high quality level we'll get :)

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On 05/22/2016 02:23 AM, Timothy M. said:

Hey Tim

took me a while to work out what was going on. I think I managed in the end, and I liked the unspoken SciFi with the basic human fear of dying alone.

Hi Tim. Glad it worked for you. I didnt want to spell it all out, i wanted you to hear the speaker. Feel him. You enter in the middle, i wanted it to dawn on you.. and i wanted it to end by the time you realized...

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On 05/22/2016 02:23 AM, Headstall said:

I loved it.Tim. The one-sided conversation was a little bit of brilliant, and your special wit shone through... the one we see in 'Farris and James'...

As amusing as it was, it struck a serious note. Isn't that what we all want... all need, when the lights go out... permanently or otherwise... to be held... and loved. Great job, buddy... cheers... Gary....

Thanks Gary. I'm glad it worked for you. I was a little worried about it but I liked it and it worked in my mind. And yeah, really thats all we really want in this world.

 

Thank gary xoxoox

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On 05/22/2016 02:42 AM, Valkyrie said:

I was a bit confused at first, but you slowly introduced elements of what was happening and painted a vivid picture. Not easily done with a monologue. Good job :)

It was fun, yet kinda sad to write. But i'm pleased it worked. I wanted it to hit you slowly.. why this guy is ranting on and then he gives up bits to you until the end.Thanks for reading Val!!

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On 05/22/2016 04:53 AM, dughlas said:

Well that was a twisted bit of fun. As with others it took a bit for me to catch on to what was truly happening. That brought a whole other of feelings to the tale. Very nicely done.

Thanks dugh.. I'm pleased it worked. I didnt want it to be clear.. i wanted it do come slowly. Thanks for your support dugh!

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On 05/22/2016 05:54 AM, AC Benus said:

Honestly, this is a difficult review to do. This is an art piece, and thus intended to be left open to interpretation, and possibly different takes over the course of follow-up readings.

 

I do think you have done the one-point conversation quite well, and you had me loving this moment:

 

"Most people don’t know the meaning of the word—honest or honesty. It is a noble word to my mind and a noble deed if anyone ever is honest—humans aren’t very good at being it. And even if we are honest to each other, we certainly aren’t with ourselves. Geez, if you lied to me the way I do to myself I’d never speak to you again!"

 

This is a fascinating exploration, and I'd like to see you do more prompt responses, if this is the high quality level we'll get :)

Gosh AC, thank you. I was a little worried about posting it, one cuz you hadn't seen it, and two while it worked for me, i wasnt so sure about others. But it seems it did. About future prompts.. I'll see what i can do.. lol.

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On 05/22/2016 06:15 AM, Emi GS said:

I'd just say:

 

"It's relates to me a lot."

 

Great work...

 

~Emi.

Oh Emi, I'm glad you could relate to this. I do hope that you are never in an interstellar star ship that's about to explode!

 

Thanks again, Emi, I appreciate your support.

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This was genius tim.. I'm not going to lie at first I went, wha? then hmm, then ohh. When I got it, I had to reread it, but I still read through the reviews to make sure I wasn't lost. Then I went genius.. I am sold on the monologue to get the point or feelings across. You did this very very well.

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On 05/22/2016 11:39 AM, Defiance19 said:

This was genius tim.. I'm not going to lie at first I went, wha? then hmm, then ohh. When I got it, I had to reread it, but I still read through the reviews to make sure I wasn't lost. Then I went genius.. I am sold on the monologue to get the point or feelings across. You did this very very well.

Thanks Def. I knew people would say, what is he doing now and I was quite nervous people would give up and say, no thanks. And then i hoped I'd done it right enough for people to feel this guy and realize everything at the end. So pleased that it worked. Thanks Def!!! As always, I appreciate it.

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Tim - this piece is fantastic. The single voiced conversation, the many blank, empty places left for the mind to fill in...this is brilliant. So much is left for me to consider and paint in my own mind, and yet I can relate to the tone and feeling of the speaker. You have outdone yourself, my friend.

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On 05/22/2016 12:09 PM, Parker Owens said:

Tim - this piece is fantastic. The single voiced conversation, the many blank, empty places left for the mind to fill in...this is brilliant. So much is left for me to consider and paint in my own mind, and yet I can relate to the tone and feeling of the speaker. You have outdone yourself, my friend.

Gosh thank you Parker. I so pleased it worked - I was so scared it wouldn't. But what the heck.. if it didn't, then it didn't. We gotta try... get your brave one and swim through the shark tank.. okay maybe lets not go that far. LOL.

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That was intense and even though I like the ending, it still made me sad. What a horrible fate to watch the clock ticking down and time running out. The story left me curious about why they were alone and what had happened. I like the unspoken and unexplained. Let's my own imagination run wild.

 

I'm glad he got a hug at the end.

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On 05/23/2016 02:17 AM, Puppilull said:

That was intense and even though I like the ending, it still made me sad. What a horrible fate to watch the clock ticking down and time running out. The story left me curious about why they were alone and what had happened. I like the unspoken and unexplained. Let's my own imagination run wild.

 

I'm glad he got a hug at the end.

Hi Pup! Thanks for reading this piece I appreciate it. It was sad and as much as I like HEA, life just aint like that, right? And your imagination.. after your prompt response.. man that was good. I really liked it. Thanks again, Pup!!

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I had to read this several times – not because it was difficult or obscure, but the more to appreciate and savour the writing and to try to imagine the other half of the conversation.

 

Just how punning and multi-layered the title is didn't become apparent to me until more than one reading (or maybe I'm not quick on the uptake :rolleyes: ). How those three words (with their shifting meanings) are woven into this monolgue is funny, sweet, moving and sad. The pathos of the ending got me every time.

 

This is something I will come back to and I expect it will have just as strong an impact.

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On 07/08/2016 11:56 PM, northie said:

I had to read this several times – not because it was difficult or obscure, but the more to appreciate and savour the writing and to try to imagine the other half of the conversation.

 

Just how punning and multi-layered the title is didn't become apparent to me until more than one reading (or maybe I'm not quick on the uptake :rolleyes: ). How those three words (with their shifting meanings) are woven into this monolgue is funny, sweet, moving and sad. The pathos of the ending got me every time.

 

This is something I will come back to and I expect it will have just as strong an impact.

Sorry, I waited until I was somewhat better. ..thank you for the review. I'm rather proud of this piece. I had no idea when I wtote the first few lines where this would go. I wanted it to be different and I think it all came together really well.

 

Thanks very much for your support and friendship!

 

tim

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That was almost poetic in how it evoke emotions and reactions. I liked how bitterness came through with the resignation. I felt like the reader was being instructed as a student of life and yet there wasn't a sense the other felt better than the reader. Impressive!

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On 07/16/2016 02:16 AM, Cole Matthews said:

That was almost poetic in how it evoke emotions and reactions. I liked how bitterness came through with the resignation. I felt like the reader was being instructed as a student of life and yet there wasn't a sense the other felt better than the reader. Impressive!

Gosh thank you, Cole. I'm rather proud of this piece. I'm so glad it worked for you.

 

I appreciate you stopping by to read it.

 

tim

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This was fantastic. You could feel the loneliness of the Cook's Mate, and nervousness that comes from being so close to death. That feeling of wanting to be held. (Which I've been experiencing a lot lately.) Perfect in my opinion Tim. Great job.

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