Black Star Cross - 14. Repeat Violations

Black Star Cross

Chapter: 14: Repeat Violations

Dammit. Where does the time go? Tomorrow, I have to go back to school. How did two weeks go by so fast? They didn’t seem so fast when I was actually living them! Now they’re gone. Now I have to go back to a place where I don’t exist and Anthony and I are mortal enemies again. I’m guessing that’s how it’s going to lay out. I don’t think that he told any of his friends that he saw over the holidays that I was living with his aunt and, basically, with him for the past two weeks. He never invited any of them over. I think it was for that very reason. He doesn’t want a confrontation between me and his friends. After all, I am just a nobody, a loser in that school. Why would Mr. Popularity want to hang with me?

I think it’s also because he knows that I have plenty to tell his friends, if we ever met. Like the fact that, ever since that night that he slept in my bed, Anthony has repeatedly done it again. In the mornings, I’ve come to expect feeling him there next to me. He claims that he doesn’t know how he gets there. He falls asleep, one time he tried sleeping on the couch downstairs, and wakes up next to me. He refuses to believe in my theory that he “needs” me there in the same room with him in order for him to become relaxed enough to fall asleep. I highly doubt that he’s been sleepwalking all this time and “magically” winds up in my bed.

It’s not that it matters anyways. Today is the last day that Anthony is staying with us. Due to bad weather, his mom had to stay at wherever she was at and so was a few days late getting home. But now, she’ll be home tomorrow and Anthony will go back to his place. I guess that I’ll miss him, a little bit. I mean, it’s not like I’ll never see him again. It’s just that, now I’ll have no one to talk to when I come home from school. I can’t really connect well with the kids, and Emmy is usually busy doing something or another to talk. And it’s not like Anthony and I will talk in school. I know that, especially with the things that have gone on in my room during the break, he’ll be extremely distant with me, if not downright hostile. I can’t blame him though. We DID almost have sex, so it’s natural that he’ll be a little paranoid, thinking that if he gets too close to me, that everyone will somehow be able to tell that we got intimate with each other.

“Hey, dude.”

I spun around, seeing Anthony at the doorway. It was already mid-afternoon.

“Hey. What’s up?”

“Nothing much, dude. I just have to pack a couple more things and then I’ll be ready to go tomorrow.” he said, rather quietly.

“Yeah,” I said, sadness present in my voice. “Won’t be as interesting around here.”

“Why’s that?” he said, a puzzled look on his face.

“You’ll be gone,” I said, matter-of-factly. “I won’t be able to associate with anybody here. Won’t be able to really talk to anybody.”

“Dude. We’ll still see each other in school. It’s not like I’m moving to another state.”

“Anthony, I know that you won’t talk to me once we’re in school. That’s how it’s always been. You don’t have to lie to me to make me feel better for a little bit longer.”

“Hey now. I’ll still talk to you, dude. I won’t be like ‘that’ to you anymore. Okay?”

I looked up at him, once more trying to see into his eyes for deceit or empty words.

“Look all you want, dude. I’m being serious.” he said, surprising me. How did he know what I was doing? Again, he read my mind. “I’ve known you long enough to know what you’re doing. It’s a good ability. One I don’t have, but wish I did. But anyways, I’m being serious, and sincere. I won’t make fun of you anymore. You’re too cool for that.”

I smiled inwardly. It was the first time I’ve ever been called “cool,” let alone “too cool.” I knew that that was, at least, a lie. But here’s another question.

“What about your ‘role’? Will you still incorporate that into our conversations that we have? Will you only see me in my ‘role’?”

Now his face became more troubled, more worrisome. I didn’t like that face.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so but...I don’t know.”

I didn’t say anything back. It’s not like there was anything really to say. I hoped that he would still talk to me in a friendly manner. But, I especially knew how hard high school life can be. You can say that none of the high school drama affects you, but in actuality, it does, in ways that you can’t recognize. So in reality, I knew that Anthony will probably not talk to me in school, or, if he does, it will be to torment me like he used to. But that still doesn’t stop me from hoping.

“Well, I guess I should finish getting my things together, dude.”

“Yeah.”

Neither of us moved. Neither of us said anything. Neither of us even looked away from each other. This went on for a couple of minutes. Eventually, I couldn’t take anymore and simply got up and left the room. From what I could tell, he didn’t move at all the entire time.

I think it’s easy to say that I didn’t want him to leave. But, what could I do? Ask him NOT to go home to his mom? What kind of retarded asshole would I look like then? He has to go home. It’s the only way. I couldn’t separate Anthony from his mom. That would just be cruel.

~~~

After we all had dinner that night, I didn’t feel like doing anything else, especially if it involved Anthony. I went directly to my room. I don’t know whether or not I really expected Anthony to come in right after me, but I was surprised that he did nonetheless. Nothing was said between us. He just walked over and lay down on my bed. Not SAT down, LAID down. What was going on here?

“Hey, dude,” he said, as if nothing was out of the ordinary.

“Um, hey,” I replied, rather nervously. Okay, let’s just get it out of the way. “Why are you in my bed?”

“Simple. I can’t sleep in my bed. I always end up in your bed anyways, dude. So I might as well sleep in your bed to begin with.”

“Are you aware that I’ll be in the bed as well?”

“Yeah. Why do you ask?”

“Um, why are you like this? What’s wrong? Why the sudden change in attitude?” I was genuinely confused. Why was Anthony acting like this?

“What do you mean? I just want to get to sleep faster, dude.”

“Yeah but, it’s not like you to want to willingly sleep with me.”

He sighed.

“Look. I’m willing to sleep in your bed, and, I guess, with you, as long as we don’t do anything, like, kissing or anything. It’s just so I can get a good night’s sleep. That’s all.”

I simply shrugged off his lame reasons. I knew that it wasn’t because he wanted a “good night’s sleep.” Every morning, when I woke up, his face looked so content, and he never woke up groggy or anything. No, it wasn’t because of sleep.

We both stayed in bed together, occupying ourselves with something else, him with one of his presents and me with a book. I eventually left to take a shower. I made sure that I undressed only AFTER I was in the bathroom. No way was I letting Anthony have a free show. Though I can’t say that I didn’t want one myself.

After I was done, I dried off and brushed my teeth. It was only then that I realized that I had no clean pair of clothes to change into. Crap. No matter. I’ll just put my used set of clothes on and change into a clean pair when Anthony takes his shower. I walked back to my room and immediately, Anthony had to question me.

“Dude, didn’t you just wear that? Don’t you have any clean clothes left?”

“Well yeah, but I forgot to bring them with me to the shower. I’ll just change after you leave.”

“Okay man. I’ll just leave now.”

Anthony got up, grabbed a clean pair of boxers, and left for the bathroom, closing the bedroom door on the way out. As soon as the door shut, I was off the bed, stripping my dirty briefs off, and grabbing a clean pair. No sooner than I was completely naked did I hear the door open. I quickly grabbed whatever I could to cover myself. The door opened and I found, of course, Anthony standing there.

“Dude, I accidentally grabbed one of your boxer briefs and...Whoa!”

He saw me standing there, butt-naked, and I was apparently clutching one of his dirty boxers next to my crotch. We both stood frozen in place, and I could feel Anthony’s eyes scanning me all over. This all only lasted for about a second or two. It just seemed like it lasted longer.

“Anthony! Get out!”

He turned his head away, but not before I noticed that his face was completely red.

“Dude, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to barge in like that. I should’ve knocked. Um, here’s your underwear.”

With that, he threw the undergarment in my general direction, for he still was looking away. He had a hard time trying to find his way around the room without looking at it. When he finally got his own boxers, he wasted no time in getting out the room as fast as possible. After he sped out of the room, I quickly ran to the door and locked it. Then, and only then, did I finally change into my clean pair of briefs.

Oh my God. I cannot believe that that just happened. What the hell was he thinking? Did he ever stop to think about knocking first? I mean, I did say that I would be changing after he left for the shower. And why did he look at me like that? For Pete’s sake, I thought that he was about to jump me, with the way that he was analyzing me. This just reinforced all of my suspicions of him liking me more than just a friend.

I eventually unlocked the door AFTER I had changed. When Anthony inevitably came back in, I was back to reading my book and trying to forget the entire incident. This, however, was not to be, for Anthony was clad only in a towel, and he did not have any clean clothes with him. He saw me eyeballing him mercilessly, not like I was doing it discreetly.

“Dude, don’t look at me like that. I totally soaked my boxers while getting out of the shower so I need a dry pair.”

Then he did something that I NEVER would’ve expected him to do. He went over to his dresser and dropped his towel to the floor! He bent over to open the dresser drawer and get out a fresh pair of boxers. In doing so, he totally exposed his hairy asshole to me, and I nearly started drooling right then and there. I couldn’t stop staring at it, it was so hot! Why do I think it’s so hot?! It doesn’t make sense! I wanted to be so close to it, to put my face into it, to lick it, to fuck it, to do so many things to it. Thinking about all of this gave me an instant woody, and I thought that I was about ready to explode in my briefs without touching myself. Before Anthony turned around, I hid my face back into my book. Dammit! I never got to see his package! I was too busy staring at his delicious ass!

I thought that I had gotten through the worst of it, but I had forgotten what Anthony had said earlier. After he’d put his boxers on, he came striding over to my bed and pulled the covers down, climbing into bed with me. I swear, at that moment, it was like the lamb had waltz into the lion’s den with fresh gazelle meat strapped to its sides. And the lion was famished. I didn’t know how I was going to get through the night without raping Anthony in some form or another. I thought about going to the bathroom to relieve my “problem,” but something was making me stay there in bed with Anthony.

I rolled over to my side and tried to fall asleep as soon as possible. A few minutes later, I heard Anthony put down whatever he was reading and reach for the light switch. With the lights out, he settled comfortably in the bed. For some reason, this included draping his arm over my shoulder and landing it on my chest. This did not go unnoticed by me, for I immediately sat up straight in bed, which removed his arm from me.

“Anthony! What the hell are you doing?!”

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” he said, in a strangely calm voice.

“Well, yeah but...”

“Then what’s wrong, dude?”

“It’s just that...this isn’t like you. At all. The entire day, you’ve been acting really weird. What’s wrong?”

“Look. I know that it’s my last day here. I know that we’ll both be lonely when I leave. I really like you, but only as a friend! So, I figured that I’d make you happy on the last day we have together. I may not like it, but if you do, then that’s all that matters.”

Did this guy hear himself talk?!? How much more contradictory can one person get?! He only likes me as a friend, but he’s okay with sleeping, and spooning, with me? Next thing you know, he’ll give the okay for us to make out and sleep naked with each other!

Okay. That image suddenly reminded me of my “problem” that I had not too long ago. Now it was back, in full force. When I came back to reality, I also noticed that Anthony was rubbing my leg with his hand. By now, my eyes had adjusted to the dark, so I could see his face clearly. It was still looking at me. With me being in total heat at the moment, and Anthony offering to make me happy for tonight, it was no surprise that the next move I made was to lock lips with his and go for an all-out attack on his esophagus. As I had expected, Anthony didn’t put up much of a fight, if any. I knew what I wanted, I knew how to get it, and this time, there was less clothes to get in the way and no possibility of having anybody else interrupt us.

Again there was grinding of crotches, moaning of pleasure, grabbing of anything we could get our hands on, arms and legs intertwined with each other, and all that good stuff. My brain had long ago shut itself off, leaving me with just instincts and urges to go by. Since Anthony was practically mirroring me, I supposed that it was the same way with him as well. This time, it was I who started kissing downwards on Anthony’s body. It was I who started sucking on his erect nipples, it was I who had him bucking in my hands uncontrollably, it was I who had him moaning my name louder and louder. I was the one who was kissing down to his bellybutton this time. I was the one who was driving him wild. I was the one who boldly grabbed at his boxers and squeezed his cock. I was the one who made him gasp and writhe in ecstasy as a result of my advances.

Despite me trying to invade a space no one has ever ventured to before, I still looked up at his face, waiting to see an approving smile, or a glazed look, or something! Well, I finally got him to look down at my face, and I saw that he was confused about whether he wanted this to continue or not. He was clearly thinking about this, despite my techniques at making him just relax into the moment. Despite my better judgment, I wanted to do this when he was truly ready, so I waited for his response. I also tried putting on my best puppy dog eyes, just for good measure. He seemed to have reached a conclusion.

“If I say ‘stop’...” he began.

I caught on to what he was going to say instantly.

“...then I’ll stop,” I finished.

He didn’t reply back, but he did a slight nod, so I took that as his “okay” and began to go lower. Like he did before, I pushed my face next to his crotch, inhaling his masculine scent. I swear he could’ve put that into a bottle and sold it as cologne and would’ve made millions from it. He sure has at least one happy customer here- has me hooked for life! While I was basking in his male-like aura, my hands decided to take a field trip around his body. One landed at his balls and started caressing them, while the other went to his ass and started groping the soft mounds of flesh for everything they’re worth. What came out of this? A nice, healthy moan coming from deep within Anthony’s throat. That was all I needed to get me motivated enough to start tugging at his boxers, slowly peeling them downwards.

“Wait! Stop! Shawn...no!” cried out Anthony.

It took a couple of seconds for his voice to register in my head, for at the time, I was getting a peak at his pubic hairs. I guess they didn’t register quick enough, because Anthony then shoved my head away from him while also kicking me back as well. A little stunned by this sudden reaction, I looked up at him, practically demanding an explanation with my eyes.

“Dude, I can’t,” came his plea. “I thought I could, but I can’t. It’s just too gay for me. I can’t do it. Even if it’s just me getting the blowjob. I’m sorry.”

I was still fucking horny as hell, so I was pissed at him for ruining what could’ve been the best fucking night of our lives. And I was going to let him know it!

“Anthony, you fucking bastard! Stop trying to make excuses for yourself! You say that you can’t do it, yet here you are, just moments away from it! And you were enjoying yourself the entire fucking time! Don’t tell me that you can’t do it when you don’t even believe it yourself! And I’ve had it with this fucking gay shit! You’re gay, Anthony! Get the fuck over it! It’s not the end of the world! I’m fucking sick and tired of always hearing about your ‘pity me, I don’t know who I am’ speech. You’ve known ‘who you are’ for quite a damn while now, so stop with all the bullshit.”

I paused to catch my breath while Anthony just sat there in horror and disbelief from my little rant that I just had. And unfortunately for him, I still had plenty of steam left. Before he even had a chance to open his mouth again, I opened mine first.

“No. Shove it. You know what? I’m tired of hearing this from you all the time. It’s really gotten on my nerves. I don’t want to see you or even be near you anymore. That includes now. Get out. I want you out of this room RIGHT NOW! This is, first and foremost, MY room, and you no longer have the right to be here! Sleep in the halls, sleep on the couch, sleep outside, I DON’T FUCKING CARE! I want you out of my room now!”

I made sure to lace the last word with as much venom as possible. I made sure that Anthony got the point. He was still too shocked to do anything, so I grabbed his book and started to throw it at him. He got the message and leaped out of bed and ran to the door. I still managed to throw the book at him before he got out. I hoped that it gave him a paper cut. After he left, I went to the door and locked it. Going back to my bed, I lay down, sighed heavily, and tried my best not to think about anything while trying to get to sleep.