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Cards on the Table - 11. Chapter 11 Playing For Real
Chapter 11
Kendall puttered around in the kitchen as Michael pushed number two on his phone. It didn’t take long before his face lit up.
“Mom, how are you?”
“Oh, bonnie boy, I’ve been so worried about you… you and Kendall. Is everything all right? Kendall told me you have a concussion, and about your knee. Do you need help with anything?”
“Mom, Mom, take it easy! Don’t be worried about a thing, okay? Kendall is taking very good care of me... trust me.” At that, he blew the man a silent kiss and then winked. Kendall stuck his tongue out, turned around, and pulled his shorts quickly down and up over his ass. Michael stifled the laugh in his throat, and tried to concentrate on what his mother was saying.
“I do trust you and I trust Kendall is doing everything he can, but this is your second concussion, and that scares your dad and me.”
“I know, and I understand, but since the first headache went away I haven’t had another one, and I haven’t had any nausea this time either. This isn’t the worst knock my head has taken, and the swelling in my knee has gone down already. The pain is less too, so I don’t think it will turn out too bad. I have to go see the same doctor who examined me at the hospital, tomorrow sometime. We're going to call in the morning for the appointment time, and then I’ll have a better idea of what to expect. I might need therapy but I don’t think I’ll need surgery.”
“Do you want us to come down and take you to your appointment? You know we don’t mind at all.”
“Thanks for the offer, and I know you wouldn’t mind, but Kendall’s already arranged a few days off work. He’s going to take me, so you don’t have to worry. I promise you I’m doing well, and you know how I bounce back from stuff like this.”
“Don’t get cocky, Michael. You’re not Superman. You take this seriously, okay?”
“No worries. Kendall takes this seriously enough for the both of us. He’s fussing over me like a mother hen, and if he asks me one more time how I am, I’m gonna drop him. Okay, maybe not drop him cause the bastard’s too freaking big.” It was Michael’s turn to stick his tongue out. Kendall just lifted his arm and flexed his very large, very sexy bicep.
Dammit. He'd lost his train of thought. “Sorry, what was that? Yeah he’s good… he seems to like putting up with me although all he feeds me is Chinese food because he doesn’t know how to cook.”
Kendall leaned against the counter, crossed those golden haired arms, and stared at Michael with a look that said he was pushing it.
“You two never stop, do you? I bet he is glaring at you right now, or showing you one of his fingers.” Her giggle made her son laugh.
“Don’t give him any ideas... he’s bad enough already.” That got him the predicted finger and a little smile as Kendall came around the corner to sit on his stool, distracting Michael with his turquoise gaze and the tongue licking his upper lip. Michael knew exactly what he was trying to do, and loved seeing him like this.
“I don’t want to stick my nose into anything, but did you and Kendall get to have your talk? You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to, or if it’s awkward.”
“No, it’s not awkward at all.” He gave Kendall a beseeching look, and Kendall smiled, nodding his encouragement. “We’re talking a lot and figuring things out, and I think everything is going to turn out just fine. We’re both taking your advice, Mom." The whole time he stared into Kendall’s eyes, feeding on the love and approval there.
“That’s so good to hear. You can’t go wrong when you communicate. I want my two beautiful boys to be happy, so whatever happens, me and your dad are behind you both.”
Michael’s eyes misted, and looking into Kendall's, he saw the same thing happening to him. His mind went to their spoken commitment earlier, as well as the most profoundly enjoyable and important hug of his life. Exploring the depth of his feelings for the blond man was something he planned on doing forever.
“We know we can always count on you and Dad. You know you’re the greatest, right? The best mom in the whole wide world. The same goes for Dad, too. We love you both.” Kendall let out an exuberant cheer to affirm what Michael said. He leaned over and gave Michael a fleeting, hit and run kiss.
“Tell Kendall I heard that. We love you boys too. Give him our love, and call us after you see the doctor, okay?”
“Will do, but it won’t be till late afternoon, and we’ll come up and see you guys once I get medical clearance. Bye, Mom.”
“Bye, bonnie boy.”
A couple of hours later, they were cuddled in bed, watching, of all things, one of those beach movies. Funnily enough, it was Michael’s suggestion, insisting he knew how much Kendall liked them. Kendall wasn’t buying it, but he chose not to tease Michael.
“There’s no Moondoggie in this one. We have to watch one of the Gidget movies to see him.”
“Do you want to switch movies?”
“No, 'Beach Blanket Bingo' is one of my favorites,” Kendall said as he stroked Michael’s arm. They settled down comfortably to watch the movie.
It wasn't long before he started getting a vibe from Michael that something was bothering him. There was a slight stiffness in his body to go with the occasional little catches in his breath that sounded suspiciously like sighs. “Are you okay? You seem pretty quiet.”
“Yeah, I’m good. Just thinking, is all.”
“Are you going to tell me what you’re thinking about? Does it have anything to do with us, or your call to Coleen? You seem like you’re worried about something.”
“No, nothing like that. Okay, maybe it does have to do with us… but I’m feeling kind of weird about something and I know I shouldn’t be, so I’m kind of embarrassed... and ashamed of myself, you know?”
“No, I don’t know. What the heck are you talking about? If it has to do with us then we have to talk about it, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, but it’s gonna make me look like a jerk.”
Kendall could see the man was reluctant to reveal whatever was on his mind, and he didn’t want to push, even though he was both curious and concerned. Instead, he waited. “We can talk whenever you’re ready.” Kendall snuggled down against him again, his head resting on a strong arm and shoulder, breathing in the comforting scent that was Michael.
“Moondoggie.”
Kendall was startled by the one word. “What about Moondoggie, Ace? What are you talking about?”
“I want to talk about Moondoggie.”
Now Kendall got it. “You want to talk about Chet? Is that who you mean when you say Moondoggie?”
“Yeah, I don’t want to, but I think we should because I don’t want to start off not being upfront with you… about how I’m feeling. I know that’s the wrong way to do things and I don’t want to fuck anything up. I don’t want talking about him to fuck things up either, though.” He turned his head and looked at Kendall, trying to come up with the right way to let his feelings out. He didn’t need to.
“You’re jealous of my friendship with Chet still?”
“I’m sorry, but yeah, and I know it doesn’t matter because it’s you and me now, but the thought of him kissing you and touching you, and stuff like that… it’s driving me crazy. I’m not proud of it but I hate him, and I hate myself for taking so long to….”
“Hold on there, Ace!” Kendall was horrified. “Kissing and touching and stuff! That’s what you think? Oh shit… this is my fault. Fuck me!”
“Okay.”
“Smart ass. Listen, there has been no kissing or touching between Chet and me, and certainly no stuff!”
Michael’s face morphed into a smile as big as all outdoors before he turned serious again. “Really… but I thought you two had gotten very close? Sandy said you guys were so good together, and you said you were moving on, and I wouldn’t blame you for wanting to be with him. He’s a lot better looking than I am, and he’s built like a tank.” Looking perplexed and relieved both, he stared at Kendall.
“First of all, Sandy knows shit. Yes, we do get along well. He’s a great guy, and he kind of reminds me of you in some ways. He has that same noble quality you have.”
“I have a noble quality? Really? I don’t feel very noble right now. I feel like an ass.”
“Stop. You were just a little insecure because I didn’t do my job as your partner. I should have figured out you might think something like this. Sometimes I’m pretty dense. Do you remember when you showed up outside my work last Monday?”
Michael nodded, looking contrite.
“I’m going to be completely honest here. I’d been holding off on moving forward with Chet because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t make any progress getting over you. I know I was cruel that day.” Michael started to object, but Kendall wouldn’t let him. “Please wait. I had made up my mind earlier that day I was going to try harder to move on… with Chet, and when you showed up, I took one look at you and knew I wouldn’t be able to do it. I acted pissed off at you, but I was really pissed off at myself. My stupid plan wasn’t working; all it did was hurt you and make myself feel like shit."
“You should have been pissed off at me, man. I jumped the gun, and I didn’t give you any warning. I felt terrible about what I did.”
“That’s the thing, though. You ended up doing exactly the right thing by showing up. It may not have seemed like it at the time, for either of us, but afterwards I took Chet to dinner to thank him for chauffeuring me around... that's when Beauty was in the shop, and we had a good talk. It was a talk about where we stood. He saw the way I reacted to your sudden appearance and could tell I was far from over you. He’s a really smart guy, and he understood completely when I told him I only wanted friendship. He agreed with me that it wouldn’t be the right thing to do, to get involved, and he hasn’t put any pressure on me at all. He's just been a good friend when I really needed one. We played cards the night I left you the voicemail. He listened to me while I talked... about you, and when I told him how bad I was feeling and how screwed up the whole thing was, he encouraged me to call you.” Michael looked astonished at that. “You don’t have to like him, Ace, but I think you would if you got to know him.”
“So nobody’s kissed you but me? I’m your one and only, Babe?”
“Well, nobody since Amanda, and that was a couple of years ago. You are my one and only, and you’re always going to be my one and only… and what the hell do you mean Chet is better looking than you? Sunshine, nobody on earth is better looking than you. No one is even close.” Leaning in, he nipped Michael’s ear.
“Ouch. What was that for?” Michael tried to rub the sting out of his ear.
“For thinking someone was better looking than you for starters… and for worrying about telling me what was on your mind for another. You did the right thing in talking to me, and I’m sorry I was so insensitive I didn’t pick up on it. You deserve better from your partner.”
Michael smiled when he said the word 'partner.' “Okay, but you’re wrong about one thing.”
“Oh, yeah? Do tell.”
“There is someone better looking than me.” Dark blue eyes stared into his. “Babe, looking at you takes my breath away. I know it sounds corny, but sometimes when I look at you, I have trouble breathing, and I can barely think. Do you realize you have two shades of blond in those thick eyelashes of yours, and you are the only person I’ve ever met who has eyes that color? You’re beautiful Kendall, and if you weren’t so rugged looking, I would say you were pretty. I love your blond hair and your five o’clock shadow, your dimples and those lips that make me want to kiss you every time I see them.
"Ever since I broke down at Mom and Dad’s last weekend, I see you differently. Everything about you is sexy, and I still can’t believe I was able to hold all that I feel now, inside me. You totally rock my world. I’m in heaven lying here beside you, being able to touch you and kiss you whenever I want. This is the way it always should have been. Thanks for not minding my stupid jealousy. I’ve never really felt jealous before. I never got that way over women. I guess that should have told me something too.” Michael was looking bummed-out about the past again, and Kendall didn’t want him feeling that way anymore.
“Since you’ve been honest with me, I’ll be honest with you. I can’t think badly of your jealousy when I’ve been jealous of those women you dated, a hundred times over. I used to get physically sick sometimes when I saw you with someone new, wondering if she might be ‘the one'. It was really difficult to hide how it affected me, so don’t beat yourself up for feeling that way about Chet, okay?”
“Fair enough. I don’t think I'm jealous anymore, now that I know you waited for me to get a clue. I wouldn’t have blamed you if you hadn’t, but I’m really glad you did. Now my imagination isn’t running wild.” He gave Kendall a sheepish grin as he leaned over and gave him one of those gentle soul-touching kisses. Pulling back till they were mere inches apart, Michael’s face showed intense emotion as he apologized once again. “I'm sorry you went through that… watching me go from woman to woman. I never meant to hurt you, but I did and I can’t change it. What I can do is promise, from the bottom of my heart, I will never put you through that again. I feel so lucky that you love me."
“I know you won’t, because I’ll cut your nuts off with a rusty old saw and smash them with a sledgehammer if you do. Make me jealous at your own peril.” Kendall laughed when Michael’s hand went defensively to cup his nuts, his face looking a little disconcerted. “Thanks for saying what you did. Your promise helps put it all in the past for me. I know you would never have hurt me on purpose… I always knew that. You need to stop being hard on yourself for taking time to figure yourself and us out. I understand it all now, and I don’t fault you for anything. Let it go, okay?”
“Okay… I will.” Michael's expression told Kendall it was something he'd needed to hear.
“I never would have left you wondering about Chet either, if I had stopped to consider what you might have been thinking. So I’ll make you the same promise. I won’t give your imagination any reason to run wild again, okay?”
“Yeah, that sounds good to me… thanks, Babe.”
The movie long forgotten, he grabbed the remote and turned the television off. Kissing Michael deeply, and slowly turning it into gentle little kisses, Kendall felt like they had somehow gotten closer and more solid in their new relationship, and how they were now relating to one another. He felt content. “Let’s take a little nap now. You need some rest and I’m getting a little sleepy... sound good?”
“Yeah, great idea. I feel really good about us… like we’re moving forward or something. It’s all so different, but a good different, and I think we’re doing okay at figuring stuff out. Do you know what I mean?”
“I know exactly what you mean. I was just thinking the same thing. Colleen is right about communicating, and I think we always have to keep that in mind. I just realized something.”
“What’s that?” Michael was sounding sleepy now.
“Well, if you think about it, this is the first real relationship for both of us.”
“I don’t know about you, but I was waiting for the perfect guy to come along… and he did.”
“My perfect guy came along too. Sleep tight, Sunshine. I love you.” Kendall pulled a light blanket over them so he could snuggle into his man for the real warmth.
“I love you too, Babe,” Michael muttered as he drifted off to sleep.
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