Cards on the Table - 14. Chapter 14 Some Games are Team Games

Chapter 14

Kendall had spent a couple of hours on the computer doing work related tasks, the biggest one being the new schedule. He had a knack for this kind of work… managing and organizing came easy to him. It was a strength of his and he enjoyed it... just one more of the things his tunnel-visioned father had never understood about him. Kendall was destined to be a cop like his father and grandfather before him, and no other option was to be considered or tolerated. Being able to fill out a police report was all that was required. Paperwork was for sissies, his father would say. He would say a lot of things. Kendall didn’t pick the right college. Kendall didn’t pick the right city. Cops didn’t need to learn management skills, and his son had no business doing any kind of security work. That was imitation cop crap. When Kendall couldn't get on the police force in Toronto or the surrounding area, he was ordered to get his ass back out west where his iron-willed father would get him on the force with him. That was the last thing Kendall wanted, so he rebelled. Of course he didn’t tell his father he couldn’t leave his best friend.

When Kendall took the management position with his security company, Carson Dooley went ballistic, and all but disowned him. He told his son he washed his hands of him until he came to his senses. Kendall's making a lot more money than his father meant nothing to the elder Dooley. It was about family tradition and honor. In his mind, Kendall was an ungrateful son, even though he had paid his own way since he was fourteen, and that included college. That’s what it was to be a man, according to his dad. He was a hard man to love, but Kendall did. He just didn’t like him very much.

Looking at the computer screen, his thoughts went to his mother. He loved his mom. She was a decent woman, and might have been a good mother if it hadn’t been for his dad. There would be no coddling his son… Dooley men were meant to be tough, even when they were twelve. She tried, but only when his father wasn’t around. She would always tell him his dad meant well. She would also always ask her son to go along with him to keep the peace, and Kendall did, until he couldn’t anymore. Agnes Dooley never went against her husband, even when he took his belt to his young son. To be fair he only did it twice, but in Kendall’s mind it was two times too many. He never forgave him for that, because he never did what he was accused of, either time. He wasn’t going to waste his time arguing with his father about it though. That wasn’t allowed. Reading the email from his Aunt Tess one more time, he sighed and closed it. He would think about it later.

Double-checking the finished schedule, and finding it complete and correct, he printed off a couple of copies before sending it to Jeremy’s work email. All done with his work for the day, he sat for a few minutes looking out the bedroom window. The soft drone of the television in the living room slowly seeped into his contemplation as a mental picture of Michael superimposed itself over old memories, and he found himself smiling at the thought of him. Other things, other decisions, could wait.

“Hey, Sunshine, you’re awake.”

“What do you mean? I’ve been awake the whole time.”

“Liar.”

“No really.”

“Michael, you were sawing logs when I came out to check on you half-an-hour ago. It sounded like a lumber mill in here.” Kendall leaned over and kissed Michael.

“Yuck. There’s even drool on your face.”

“Shit, I must have dozed off. Well, it couldn’t have been long then.”

“Long enough for me to make a cup of tea.” Kendall smirked, daring him to argue. Leaning back over, he licked the corner of Michael’s mouth. “There, that’s the last of it, lumberjack.”

“Thanks, Babe, although it’s a little gross that you licked drool off my face.”

“I was just returning the favor. Don’t you remember what you licked off of mine last night?”

Michael’s handsome face lit up at the memory. “Oh yeah, I guess you did owe me.”

“Yup, and I always pay my debts.”

“Come to think of it, I'm in debt to you now, and I always pay my debts.”

“We can discuss what you owe me later.” Kendall wiggled his eyebrows.

“You’re giving me a woody.”

“Everything gives you a woody.”

“Hey! That’s not true. Only you give me a woody now, or thinking about you.”

“Fair enough, big guy, I stand corrected.”

“I’m glad Chet changed his mind. How much longer till he gets here? I’m hungry.”

“Any time now. It depends on how busy the Deli is. I’m getting hungry too.”

“It’s too bad we couldn’t have gone out somewhere. I can’t wait till I’m more mobile. This is getting a little frustrating."

“I know, but you’re doing amazing. We’re really lucky it’s turning out so well. We just have to be patient.” Michael was touched with how Kendall phrased that. They were in this together. He was also pleased Chet had called earlier to say he would bring over lunch and have a visit. Michael knew it meant a lot to Kendall.

Right on cue, there was a knock on the outside door, announcing Chet’s arrival. Kendall let him in and took the bag of food from him, while Chet, nodding at Michael, took off his boots and jacket. Once again, Michael was reminded of how good-looking the man was. Standing up, he was greeted with a hug from Kendall which he returned in a manly, back-slapping way. Michael wondered if that was for his benefit. Making their way over to him, Chet held out his hand. “Nice to actually meet you, Michael.”

“Nice to actually meet you, Chet. I remember you from the Spectrum.” Michael’s face was open and friendly. Kendall was watching the exchange with interest as the two big men interacted for the first time.

“Yeah, I used to watch you and Kendall tear through the weights… very impressive.” Chet was returning a relaxed friendly smile.

“You were no slouch either. I spotted for you a few times, didn’t I?”

“Yup. You egged me on to one of my best sets on bench at the time. It was brutal.” They both laughed and an easy camaraderie settled in. “So let’s eat, guys. I’m starving. I brought Rueben sandwiches, coleslaw, potato salad and pickles.”

More small talk ensued as Chet helped Kendall dish out the food onto plates before they all settled in to eat. Kendall sat down on Michael’s bed as he handed him his plate.

“Thanks, Babe.”

“You’re welcome, Sunshine.”

Realizing what they had said, they both looked at Chet at the same time. Sitting on the stool facing them, he was grinning from ear to ear.

“That’s freaking adorable, you guys. Pet names already.” He started laughing and was soon joined by Michael and Kendall. “I really am happy for you two. I could tell the first time I saw the pair of you there was something special there.”

“Really? The first time?” Michael was surprised by that.

“Really. The way you guys looked at each other did not look like only friendship. And every time I saw you after that first time, it was the same. I tried to tell that to Kendall but he wasn’t in the mood to listen. He was convinced you were straight.”

Kendall did what Michael expected, and just listened and kept eating as Chet and Michael found their common ground.

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t straight, I was stupid. I think I owe you a few thank-yous, Chet. Kendall told me you convinced him to call me, and before that, you tried to get him to talk to me. Thank you for that, man. I owe you big time. I thought I’d blown it, and it was killing me.”

“Don’t mention it. Nobody should stand in the way of a love like you two have. You’re very lucky.” A wistful look came over Chet’s face before he looked down at his food, but it had not gone unnoticed, by Michael, nor his observing partner.

“This is delicious, Chet. Thanks for doing this. Next time we’ll take you out… when my knee is a little more flexible.”

“That sounds good. I don’t really have many friends in this area. I enjoyed going to the gym and hanging out with Kendall. Everyone I know lives downtown, and I’ve kind of lost touch since I moved up here.”

“Well, you can still spend time with Kendall, and when I’m up to it, I’ll join you. How come you lost touch, if you don’t mind me asking? Downtown is only a half-hour from here.”

“I guess you could say I started a new life. A bad break-up contributed. I joined a small architectural firm up here specializing in residences, which is what I wanted to be doing. Living downtown is all about partying and hooking up and I couldn't handle that anymore. It’s hard to know what’s real when you’re in that scene. You think you know someone and you find out you don’t. Sorry, I usually don’t go on about this shit.” Chet looked a little sheepish about what he had divulged and Michael could see him tighten up.

Kendall spoke up. “Dude, Michael and I are your friends. We want to know about you. We want you to talk to us, and I mean anytime, about anything. We’re good people; you can trust us.”

Michael nodded in agreement as he watched Chet closely, noticing his shoulders relax as his composure came back. “What Kendall said. I’ve known you for like twenty minutes, and I can tell you’re a stand-up guy. You were a great friend to Kendall when he really needed one, and you didn’t put any pressure on him, man.” Michael’s direct look sent him a message. “That means a lot, to both of us.”

“I won’t lie to you, Michael. I thought Kendall was pretty special, and he is, but I knew what I was seeing when I saw you two at the gym. Besides, he made it pretty clear where his heart belonged, and that he only wanted friendship. I want you to know I completely accepted that, and Kendall’s been every bit as good a friend to me. I hope we can all be friends.”

“It’s already a done deal. Count on it. I can tell Kendall was right about you.” Michael sensed how pleased Kendall was with how things were turning out. He mostly let the two new friends interact as he watched contentedly. They continued the chatting and getting comfortable with one another until it was time to head for Michael’s therapy appointment. At one point, Kendall revealed that Michael referred to him as Moondoggie, and when he found out why, Chet thought it was hilarious, while Michael laid there blushing through his grin. Michael was never going to live that one down. It was hugs all round before Chet headed out to his Jeep. Kendall was all smiles as he leaned over Michael. The kiss was sweet and hungry at the same time, and left them both a little breathless.

“Thank you, big guy. I knew you’d like him.”

“You were right. He's cool. Could I maybe have another one of those kisses?”

Kendall’s answer took the rest of Michael’s breath away.

They received more good news at the medical center, where the therapist declared Michael’s knee fit enough to do some gentle rehab. There was no swelling from yesterday’s exercises, so he was put through them again while they were carefully explained. They were told about warning signs to look for that would indicate when to back off, and Michael was given permission to rest his weight lightly on his foot with his knee bent, for short periods of time. After the new sleeve was fitted, the happy patient was given an updated medical report for his work, and a new appointment for the following week.

On the way back to the truck, Kendall found himself cautioning Michael again, as his excitement showed in his quicker gait . “I know you’re happy… I am too, but we can’t afford any setbacks. Please slow down on those crutches. One wrong move and we could be back to square one. I don’t want to sound like Mom, but I worry, you know?”

“I know. I love that you worry about me and that you say ‘we’ when you talk about my knee. I promise you I’ll be careful, and if I get out of line, you can spank me.”

Kendall just rolled his eyes as he helped Michael into the truck. Heading out of the parking lot, Kendall turned towards Michael’s work. “Do you want me to just run the medical report in for you, or do you want to take it in?”

“How about we both go in? I should give them my new address and get my file updated.”

Kendall was curious about that. “What needs updating?”

“Ah, you.”

“Me? What do you mean, me?”

“Kendall, you’re my partner now and we’re in a common-law relationship, so I need to get that updated. You know, for my benefits and pension. And we have to put you down as my next of kin for emergencies so they contact you if something happens to me.”

“You’re coming out to your bosses? The Police Force? Is that going to be good for your career?”

“Deuce, what’s the problem here? Do you not want me to do this? You’re sounding a little freaked. We’re in this together, remember, and I’m not going to hide for, or from anyone.” Michael, surprised at Kendall’s reaction, chewed on his lip while he waited for Kendall to respond.

“Sorry, but we never talked about this. You caught me off guard, is all. It’s a big step to take with your career.”

“What’s to talk about? Do you want me to keep quiet about us? Are you not ready for this… for being open about who we are to each other?”

Kendall could hear a hint of disappointment in the softness of Michael’s voice, and it tugged at his heartstrings. Pulling into the parking lot of a small plaza, Kendall parked Beauty and got out.

Michael felt unsettled as he watched Kendall come around to the back door and open it.

“Scoot down a little. You were too far away from me.” He got in behind Michael’s spread out form, and wrapped his arms around him from behind. “Michael, trust me in this. I’m ready for anything with you. Am I worried about your career? I guess my initial reaction was yes, but that was just instinct. We both know there are a number of gay cops on the force. It’s funny when you think about it, because, if I had said I was gay, I probably would have been hired on at the time.”

“You still could, if you wanted. That might make your dad happy.” Michael was enjoying Kendall’s closeness, and those strong arms wrapped around him.

“Nah, I really like what I do. I’m happy with my career choice and at least for now, I don’t want to change it. Making my father happy is not a priority, but you are. I love you, and I support whatever you do. I want us to be open to everybody, too. I didn’t mean to sound like I didn’t. I’m happy you want to take this next step and I’ll take it with you. You know me… I just needed to digest it for a bit. Are we okay?”

Michael shivered at the tickle of that deep whisper into his ear. “Yeah, we’re good, except now I have a woody.”

Kendall laughed as he reached down to give it a teasing squeeze. “We have matching ones now,” and he pushed his hips forward to present the evidence.

“You’re a horn-dog, Deuce. We’re in a public place and we could get arrested for indecent erections. Now that would hurt my career.” They ended up a giggling mess as the previous bit of tension was no longer there. They were back on the same page.

Squeezing his big frame over into the front seat to avoid indecent exposure charges, Kendall resumed the drive to the police station, smiling at the warm feeling that filled him. Michael’s commitment to them was inspiring, and the love he exuded was constant affirmation that Kendall was the luckiest guy in the world. He arrived at the station with a new outlook, eager to stand openly at Michael’s side as his partner. Entering the building, Michael was greeted by a welcoming committee of policemen, all wanting to know how he was doing and when he was coming back. It was a reception for a man everyone liked, and thought highly of. Kendall hoped that wouldn’t change with the disclosure to come, but if his partner could handle it, then so could he.

Human resources was just one office, with a secretary out front and a gruff but friendly Mr. Parson beckoning them to take a seat.

“I can’t actually sit in a chair yet, Mr. Parson,” Michael explained while standing on his crutches and smirking at Kendall.

“Oh, right, sorry about that. Would you be able to sit on the corner of the desk? We really do need a couch in here.” Mr. Parson looked a little flustered as he cleared away a corner of the expansive old oak desk.

“Yeah, this works fine,” Michael conceded. It wasn’t ideal but he could rest his foot lightly on the floor. “Maybe you could come around this side so I can see you, though?”

“Right, Michael. I am going to bring up your file first.” Coming around the desk, he held out his hand and addressed Kendall. “And you are…?”

“I’m Kendall Dooley, sir.”

“Nice to meet you, Kendall. I assume you are Michael’s caregiver for the moment.”

“No, Mr. Parson, Kendall’s not my caregiver, he’s my partner—my common-law partner, and we would like him entered as my spouse and emergency contact, if it’s possible to do that today.”

Looking momentarily startled, the man quickly regained his composure. “Of course we can do that now. It’ll take no time at all.”

And it didn’t. A few forms later and they were done. They had decided to leave their benefits separate for the time being, but Kendall was added as the beneficiary to Michael’s pension. Mr. Parson reminded Michael that he had to have his address changed on his driver’s license as soon as possible. He also agreed to take Michael’s latest medical form upstairs to Occupational Health in order to save Michael the trip. Thanking him for his help they got ready to take their leave. Giving them a straightforward look, he wished them both good luck in their relationship, and as an aside, said “we’re everywhere, you know,” and winked at them.

Exiting the station, chuckling at Mr. Parson’s revelation, they ran into Arron, Michael’s cop buddy who had assisted them over the Lanny incident.

“Hey, Michael, Kendall… any more trouble from that dumb-ass goon?”

“Not a peep, Arron. I hear I have you to thank for Lanny deciding to leave well enough alone.”

“Well, I think his teammates were the ones who showed him the light. They were pretty pissed off at what he did. The whole bunch of them told him he deserved what he got. His obvious gunning for you cost them any chance at the tournament. So what are you guys doing here anyway? You can’t be coming back to work soon, from the look of those crutches. Are they going to stick you at a desk somewhere?”

“No, nothing like that. Kendall and I had some forms to fill out.”

“Why would you have forms to fill out, Kendall? Have you decided to join us finally?”

“He’s not joining us, but he has joined me.”

Michael's statement confused Arron, and he watched a look pass between the two. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Kendall and I are a couple now, and we just filled out forms to update my status to common-law, and put Kendall down as my emergency contact.” They both watched Arron’s face with great interest.

“Jesus Christ, you’re kidding me? You guys are gay? Holy fuck! I don’t believe it!”

“Believe it, because it’s true. Are you telling me you have a problem with it?” Michael’s voice was edged with steel, and Kendall was concerned this was the wrong place to have such a conversation. He was ready to step in if need be, but there was no need, as Arron asked if they could move over to parking lot and away from the doors.

“Look, Michael, don’t misunderstand me. You just shocked the hell out of me, is all. I wouldn’t have expected someone to say that so nonchalantly and my mouth acted before my brain caught up. I’m sorry you took it wrong. What I should have said was congratulations to the two hottest guys I know.” Arron grinned at the reactions from Michael and Kendall.

“You think we’re hot?”

“Smoking hot. It looks like we have something in common we didn’t know about, Michael.”

Michael and Kendall both laughed at that, but Kendall’s was more one of relief for his partner. He didn’t want there to be any trouble for him at fifty-one division and now it looked like he had an ally in Arron.

“So, you’re not out to anyone at work, Arron?”

“Only you now. There’s been no reason to be out. Look, could we three get together for coffee or a drink sometime? I’d like to talk to you guys. It’s hard being a gay cop in the closet and I would like to bend your ears about it, if you two wouldn’t mind?”

“Babe, are you good with that?”

Kendall nodded agreement, as Arron smiled at the endearment.

“Okay, so call us. You have my number, so call whenever you want. We aren’t doing anything most of the time because of my knee… chances are we’ll be free to get together. Our place isn’t far from here. Do you still live in the Orton Park area?”

“I’m northwest of there now, at Steeles and Kennedy.”

“Okay, that’s pretty close. We’ll do it soon, okay?”

“Thanks guys. Seeing you two together has made my day. Take care of him, Kendall. I’ll call soon.”

As Arron rushed back into work, Michael chuckled at Kendall.

“What?” Kendall asked.

“It looks like Mr. Parson was right. We are everywhere. It’s like they’re coming out of the woodwork.” The wry look on Michael's face put Kendall into hysterics, as he realized Michael had just met three gay men in one short afternoon.

“So what now? You already had your exercises for today, and since you rested some weight on your left foot, maybe we should get you settled for a while? What do you think?”

“I’m fine back here. My knee feels good and I’m comfortable. All I need is you beside me, but you being my chauffeur works too.”

Kendall could see him stick his tongue out in the rear-view mirror and asked him if that meant he wanted Kendall to suck on it.

“Babe, don’t be getting me horned up again. It’s not fair to tease your partner like that.” Michael’s whine was cute.

“Sorry, but you bring out the evil in me, and it’s so much fun. I love you, big guy.”

“I love you too, Babe, so fucking much.”

“I wonder if Arron is single?”

“Should I be worried?”

“Never, ever, ever. I was just thinking.”

“I know what you were thinking. You’re thinking about matchmaking, aren’t you?”

Kendall laughed at that. “Well, Chet is lonely, and Arron is pretty hot, don’t you think?”

“I think they would look good together, yeah, but we aren’t matchmakers. I don’t think we should get involved in that way. What if it ends up backfiring and things get awkward?”

“Aww, you’re no fun.”

“Take me home and I’ll make you eat those words… or something, anyway.”

“Now who’s the tease?”

“I ain’t teasing, Babe, and you should know that.”

“So, you want to head home?”

“Actually, I wouldn’t mind going to my old apartment to get some clothes and stuff. Maybe you could run up and grab some things for me?”

“Aha! So you were teasing me after all.”

“Nope. I was just postponing it to build the anticipation, so it would be better for you.”

“Uh huh, sure you were. That sounds like a good idea though. What are you going to do about the apartment? Your lease is up at the end of January, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it is. I have to give three a month notice of lease non-renewal so I’m a few weeks short. I may have to pay an extra month penalty, but it’s worth it to snuggle up to you every night.”

“You romancing me again, big guy?”

“Yes, I am.”

While Kendall was upstairs deciding what Michael might need for the foreseeable future, Michael saw his landlady getting out of her car in the parking lot. Opening up his door he called over to her. She made her way over to him, being mindful of the snowy patches. She was a very motherly woman who adored Michael, so she made quite a fuss when she saw his crutches. Michael had to work at placating her concerns before he could get to the point he wanted to make.

“Mrs. Beasley, I’m sorry but I’m going to be moving out. I know it’s short notice but I won’t be renewing my lease, so I expect I’ll have to pay a penalty.”

“Oh, Michael, that’s too bad. We all loved having such a handsome policeman in the building. You made us feel so safe. Why are you moving, might I ask?” Mrs. Beasley couldn’t ever control her nosiness but it never bothered Michael any.

“I’m moving in with Kendall, ma’am. In fact I’m already living there. I couldn’t get up the stairs here.”

“Oh, dear, that’s right, you couldn’t. You’re lucky to have such a good friend. Kendall is such a lovely man.”

“He’s more than my friend, now, Mrs. B, he’s my partner.” Surprisingly, Mrs. B didn’t bat an eyelash at the news.

“Congratulations! I’ve always said you should take love where you find it, and I thought there were a lot of feelings between you two.” Her giggle sounded just like his mom’s as he wondered again at how so many saw what he didn’t. “Michael, I have an idea. You know Karen, in 201?” Michael nodded. “Well, her brother from the east coast is staying with her, and that boy just got himself a good paying job nearby and he was asking me about any vacancies just this morning. I can’t return your last month’s rent to you but we could use that for December, if you could be out by December thirty-first. That would save you a month’s rent and the penalty, if Karen’s brother wants to sign a lease for January first. Do you mind if I show him the apartment, if he’s home?”

“Not at all, Mrs. B, that would work out perfectly. You can tell him he can move in December first, if he buys the furniture for a thousand dollars so I don’t have to move it. I just want the towels and bedding and a few things out of the kitchen, mostly the coffeemaker.”

“That’s a great deal for him, and he is such a sweet boy. Can you wait a bit while I go talk to him?”

“Sure thing, Mrs. B. Kendall is upstairs now, getting some of my clothes, so if you show the apartment, don’t be surprised that he’s there.”

“Okay, thanks for the warning. I’ll be back to let you know what he said.”

Twenty-five minutes later, Lorne was beside the truck, shaking hands with Michael, ecstatic with the deal Michael had given him. It was agreed he would pay Michael for the furniture at the end of January. After getting Michael’s new address and phone number, he shook his hand once again and was off, a very happy young man. Kendall looked on in amusement.

“He loved the apartment and the furniture. He was like a kid in a candy store. He signed the lease right away… his sister co-signed for him. It was really sweet how excited they were that they would be living so close together. You did give him a good deal. Now there’s no changing your mind about us living together.” There was a twinkle in Kendall's eye as he said that. “So do you want to tell me who ate some of my cereal?”

With an embarrassed look on his face, Michael said, “Shit, you weren’t supposed to see that!” Kendall raised a quizzical eyebrow and waited. “I was missing you, okay, and I ate that crap because it was yours, and it made me feel closer to you. And if you must know, I slept with your hoodie, too.” Michael’s eyes watered at the memory of how alone he felt.

“I know... I saw the hoodie on your pillow. It made me so sad and so happy at the same time. It’s amazing to know you love me that much. You know I feel the same way, right?”

“Yeah, I do. You let me know it with all the things you say and do.” Michael was relieved Kendall hadn’t asked him if he liked the cereal.

Halfway home, Kendall caught Michael's eye in the rear-view mirror. “So, did you like the cereal?”

“Shit.”

Kendall smirked. He knew Michael so well.

Supper was a simple meal of grilled ham, baked potato, and a tomato, cucumber salad, followed by black cherry frozen yogurt for dessert. “You make a good wife, Babe.”

“If you ever want sex again, you might want to take that back.”

“Fuck me, you play hardball. I take it back. Seriously, I take it back.”

“You are so easy, big guy.” Kendall laughed at the panic Michael had shown. “Like I could ever cut you off.”

“I am pretty irresistible, aren’t I?”

“Yes you are... you definitely are irresistible.”

Later, all showered and ready for bed, Kendall insisted on putting Michael’s clothes away while Michael watched television. Michael kept his eye on Kendall the whole time, as he went from suitcases to the dressers to the closet, reorganizing and arranging things to his satisfaction. He was so beautiful to look at that Michael was mesmerized. He was wearing brilliant blue boxer briefs and nothing else and the strength showed in every movement he made. At that moment, lying in their bed, in their apartment, and watching his guy, Michael truly felt like the luckiest person in the world.

“Come to bed now, Babe. I’m missing you over here.” Michael’s pouting face worked as Kendall settled in beside him with a sigh.

“I love you. Having your clothes right beside mine gives me an incredible feeling… like a sense of peace. It makes it all seem so much more real. Every day we become more solid. Do you know what I mean?

“I do know what you mean. Giving up my apartment today was like that too. It felt right doing it because that was my old life. Being here with you is my new life… and it’s perfect, isn’t it?”

“It is perfect, Sunshine. I just wish…”

“You just wish what? Is something wrong? Kendall?”

“I didn’t want to wreck our perfect moment.”

“It isn’t perfect if something’s bothering you. Talk to me, please?”

Kendall could feel Michael’s distress. “It’s not about us, big guy. We’re great. Better than great. It’s something else. Tessa sent me an email this morning.”

“Your aunt Tess?”

“Yeah. She said my dad’s sick. He has cancer. Bowel cancer.”

“I’m so sorry, Babe. How bad is it?”

“They don’t know yet. He wouldn’t let my mom contact me. He doesn’t want me to come and see him.”

“Maybe he doesn’t want to worry you? Maybe he wants to wait and see how it is first?”

“Maybe.” Kendall didn’t believe that, though.

“What do you want us to do?”

“I don’t know yet.”

“Is there anything I can do for you now?”

“Can you just hold me?”

Michael was thankful he could finally lie on his side, with a pillow between his knees. He wrapped Kendall in his arms from behind and pulled him in as close as he could, being the big spoon for his guy. “I can hold you forever, Babe.”

Kendall smiled at that as his eyes leaked tears for his father.