I hate it when the tow-truck driver makes me wait...

It’s dark but the tent is up! You’re hungry and I forgot the can opener—that’s a little over-kill isn’t it?

What do you mean it's not for the can?

I'm sure there's another way we can iron out that little misunderstanding.  I really didn't mean to run you off the road!

I have an offer, that you just can't refuse.

You asked me to open that jammed door in the basement.

Let's get this done and over with.

“No... tire... irons. What’s a tire iron doing in the trunk when I told you: no tire irons ever. Why, Christina? Why?”

Now, ‘Mr. President’, it is time to discuss the location of your Rebel Base.

"Donnie, put that away. He's scared enough as it is, and you know they taste better when they aren't so panicked. It's those damned endorphins or something... they're bitter, especially in the heart. And take off that mask before he comes to, you moron... dead men can't talk." 

Ooops... as has been pointed out to me, I missed the part about the thirty word limit... just ignore the last sentence, and I'll go have another coffee.  

I told you that I'd find you before dawn. Game over.

If you couldn't kill me with the truck, why should that help? I warn you, I'm hungry. 

"Coming this October to the Kern Theatre, it's Jason, the Musical! Get your tickets now." 

Morgan turned to face his stalker; the bright light blinding him as the shadow approached.  The weight of the tire iron reassured him, though his mouth was parched with fear.

BREAKING....From West Kill, New York: 

“Reports of alarming, suspicious activity, at this year’s ‘Meet Iron Man’ community event. News crews are arriving on scene. Stay tuned.”

It was a crowbar.  Who’d left that in the road?  But as the headlights of his truck switched to the brights, he realized that he’d fallen for the trap.

Really, Sheriff, I locked myself out of the house and was just using this to get inside. 

"I don't care what you do to me...I won't tell you where my butter finger is"

Play Clue, the Haunted Version.  Dibs on Jason in the road with a crowbar.

And I suppose that toilet paper and shaving cream were to go in your bathroom at home, right? Sure it was.