Aria Graice - 27. Chapter 27

It was hard for Drew to leave Amara. He looked so small and vulnerable. He’d been exhausted, and despite the pain it hadn’t taken him long to fall asleep. Drew had held him until his head grew heavy and his body slack, then carefully settled him back on the pillows. Even then he’d lingered, unable to tear himself away from the beautiful boy, wondering what the hell he’d done. It had felt so good to hold Amara, to finally be able to stroke his soft hair and rest his cheek on it, and beyond good to kiss him. It was easy to tell Amara wasn’t inexperienced, but that didn’t matter. It only made Drew feel better, underlining the fact that Amara was no virginal child. In fact, in those few minutes when Amara buried his fingers in Drew’s hair and took complete control of the kiss, the six years between them disappeared and it was Drew who felt like needy, immature one.

Finally, Drew slipped out of the room and headed downstairs. He was surprised to find Jay and his mother in animated conversation about fashion, while Aria slept on the sofa with a blanket tucked around him.

“I didn’t know you knew so much about fashion, Mam.”

She nodded to the corner of the room. “See that thing over there? The black thing. It’s called a television and it’s surprising what you can find on there when you’re bored.”

“Haha.”

Drew sank onto the floor next to the sofa, as Jay and his mother were taking the only two chairs.

“Besides,” she said, tossing her head, “who better to talk to about vintage fashion than a vintage woman.”

Jay snorted and Drew shook his head, grinning.

“How’s Amara?” Jay asked.

Drew sobered immediately. “Sleeping. He’s in a lot of pain. He really should go back.”

Jay huffed. “Not after I burst a gut to get them here. It’s not Amara you should be worried about. They’d have sent him home yesterday if he hadn’t refused to leave without Aria. It’s Aria they wouldn’t discharge. They wanted to send him to a private clinic, and with Julianna refusing to engage, and Henley running away from the pressure, it looked as though they were going to push Amara aside and take the decision out of his hands.”

“Shit. I wish I hadn’t left.”

Jay glanced away, staring at the fireplace. The old black-lead grate was still there, but it was filled with flowers these days. His mother had resisted central heating for a long time, but convenience and comfort won over nostalgia more than ten years ago, and the house was centrally heated now.

“The thing is, Drew,” they said softly. “I’m not sure that wouldn’t be the right thing to do. I don’t know how to help him, Amara’s in no state to make decisions and he thinks all he needs do is keep Aria with him and everything will be alright, but I’m not sure they will be. None of us are experts.”

“No, that’s true, but Amara has a point. Aria’s had a hell of a shock and he needs to know he’s safe. Surely, he’s going to be more settled with the people he loves around him, not strangers.”

“But isn’t that for the doctors to decide.” Jay cleared their throat. “I’ve been there—to a psychiatric hospital. I wasn’t rich then, couldn’t afford a clinic. It wasn’t that bad. I saw people like Aria, usually after a major shock. They got better, but it took work, and they weren’t allowed to even see their family for a while, until they were kind of back with us.”

“That sounds barbaric. Cruel.” Drew shuddered to think of Aria in a scenario like that, locked away and alone, surrounded by strangers and cut off from those who loved him.”

“Maybe, but it wasn’t. It worked.”

Drew frowned, and a strained silence fell over the room. Hardly aware of what he was doing, Drew sought out Aria’s hand and laced their fingers together. Aria’s fingers twitched and he murmured softly in his sleep, but he didn’t wake

“If you’re wondering,” Jay said at last, “I had a breakdown when my parents threw me out and I was living on the street. It was only for three months, but it was the worse three months of my life. The things I saw…” They shuddered, their eyes glittering as their thoughts turned inward. “I couldn’t handle living like that, and I couldn’t see any way out.” They glanced up at both Drew and his mother. “I didn’t try to kill myself. I was never suicidal. I love life too much to ever leave it voluntarily. I’m going kicking and screaming all the way.” They flashed a small smile. “In fact, I was kicking and screaming all the way. That’s why they committed me. Someone tried to…” Jay bit their lip and took a breath before going on. “A group of boys started pushing me around and with every taunt, every push, pressure was building in me. Then one of them pinned me down and another stood there grinning at me and unzipped his trousers.” Jay glanced at Mrs. Chance. She smiled encouragingly. If Jay was worried about her hearing the hard facts of life, they needn’t have bothered. She’d seen enough of that herself. “I-I lost it. I don’t know where I found the strength and I can’t honestly say I remember what happened, but apparently I almost castrated him and put one of them in the hospital with a broken jaw. It was nuthouse or jail. Fortunately, the doctors pronounced me barking mad, and when the facts came out neither of the boys wanted to press charges so that was that.”

Jay seemed taken aback when Drew’s mother burst out laughing. Drew wasn’t surprised. “I bet they didn’t. Way to go you. And you such a little thing too. Not that I’m happy you had a breakdown, cariad, but I’m so glad those…those…monsters got what they deserved. I despise bullies and abusers. And even if you were barking mad, you were still brave.”

Jay quirked an eyebrow, then grinned. “I like you,” they said. “Drew,” they said in a commanding tone, “you’re lucky to have such a great mother. Be nice to her.”

“See,” she said, “I’ve been telling you that for years.” She gave Jay one of her special smiles. “I like you too, cariad.”

“What’s that word?” Jay asked, tilting their head with a little frown between their brows. “Curry-add?”

“Cariad,” Drew corrected, finding the round Welsh vowels and rolling “r” falling naturally back into place. He’d noticed his accent had been fading for a while, but it always came back when he was home. “It doesn’t have a direct translation, not with all the nuances. I suppose the closest is darling. It can be used in a romantic context but it’s mostly casual these days, and it’s a bit old fashioned. You usually find middle aged mother figures using it.”

“Oy you.” His mother threw a coaster at him. He caught it and flicked it back. She caught it just as easily but set it down. “Alright, who’s for sandwiches? I don’t know about the rest of you, but all this drama makes me hungry.”

“I was wondering how long it would take you to feed them,” Drew said with a laugh. “Frankly, I thought you’d have brought the welshcakes out sooner.”

“She did try,” Jay said, “but I diverted her with lace and tight bodices.”

Drew’s mother laughed, a gay, free laugh Drew hadn’t heard for a while. She’d been so…tight lately.

“Go on with you, bach. I’ll get something together. Can’t solve problems on an empty stomach.” She bustled out leaving them in silence.

“Did um… How did things…er…go, with Amara?”

Drew stifled a smile. He’d wondered how long it would be before Jay asked. To be fair, they’d made it longer than Drew thought they would.

“We talked.”

“And?”

“We’re working it out.”

“Goddamit, Drew, that isn’t telling me anything.”

“It’s telling you we’re working it out…together.”

Jay sat up straighter, leaning forward slightly with shining eyes. “Together, together?”

Drew hesitated then failed to suppress a grin. “I think so. We’ll have to see.”

Jay bounced on their seat, then stilled, looking thoughtful. “What about Aria?”

Drew sighed and glanced at Aria who at least seemed to be sleeping peacefully. “I honestly don’t know where we go with him. One way or another we’re going have to get him some proper help. It’s not fair on him.”

“That’s not what I meant,” Jay said softly their gaze intense.

For a moment, Drew was puzzled, then comprehension washed over him like a bucket of cold water. “I don’t know. Are you sure…”

“Oh yeah, I’m sure.

“But he’s….”

“He doesn’t like sex,” Jay snapped, “but that doesn’t mean he can’t love or that he doesn’t deserve to be loved.”

Drew was completely taken aback. “I would never have thought that in a million years. If it was only him…” He though back to the early days, when it was only him and Aria - the ridiculous cat ears, the heels, the dresses, the sweet smile, the shy glances - and his dick twitched. “Oh God, why does this have to be so complicated?”

“It’s not. Not really.”

“I can’t have them both, but if—”

“Why not?”

“Huh?”

“Why can’t you have them both?”

Drew huffed out a laugh. “Be serious, Jay. I mean they’re brothers. I know they’re close, but—”

“Look, let’s get one thing straight. Aria and Amara are not into incest, never have been, never will be and this is not about their relationship. They’re very clear about that. I can assure you there are no complications there. What we’re talking about is their relationship with you, not each other.”

“What? You’re seriously suggesting that I have a relationship with both of them, separately.”

“Yes, I am. Okay, it’ll take some work, some figuring out, trial and error. It won’t be easy, but aren’t they worth it?”

“Well yes, but…. I can’t….”

“Yes, you can. You overthink everything. I’ve noticed that. It’s really not that complicated.”

“Not for you, maybe.”

Drew was distracted from the discussion when Aria whimpered. Still clearly asleep, he mewled, his face twisting in distress. Incoherent words began to bubble from his lips and he turned onto his side, curling up tightly. Drew soothed him, stroking his hair and back, talking softly.

“It’s alright. You’re having a dream. You’re safe now. You’re safe with us.”

“Mara,” Aria moaned and Drew stroked damp hair from his cheek.

“He’s asleep. He’s exhausted. But I’m here. You’re safe with me, Aria. You’ll always be safe with me.” As he spoke the words Drew knew absolutely that they were true. The realisation broke over him like golden sunshine after rain. “I love you, Aria. I always will. I’ll never let anyone take you from me again.”

Aria continued to whimper and rock for a few moments, then he gradually stilled. Tears ran from his closed eyes and his body shook with the occasional sob, but he seemed to be calming. Drew continued to soothe him. Oblivious to anyone else in the room, he continued to tell Aria how much he loved him and promise he’d take care of him.

Finally, the storm passed and Aria was peaceful again, although when Drew tried to pull away, Aria held on to his arm with a surprisingly strong grip.

“It’s alright. I’m not going anywhere. I just need to straighten my back.”

Drew sat back on the sofa and was shocked when Aria immediately scrambled onto his lap, with his eyes still tightly closed. He accepted him readily into his arms and cradled him gently, rocking as one might with a child.

He glanced up, surprised when his mother tucked the blanket around Aria. He smiled gratitude and she stroked Aria’s hair before returning to her task.

When there was no further movement, Drew assumed Aria had fallen asleep again and relaxed.

“I told you,” Jay said, sounding smug. “When it comes right down to it, it isn’t very complicated at all.”

Drew wasn’t convinced, and his mind kept rolling over and over the whole ludicrous situation. How could anyone think it would be alright to have a romantic relationship with both twins at the same time? Especially when they weren’t…. But Aria was asexual so there wouldn’t be any sex involved with him, that would be all Amara. Then, Amara was away a lot touring, so Drew would be there for Aria. But how would it work? Would they sleep in the same bed? What would Aria do when he and Amara were—”

“You’re overthinking again.” Jay cut into his thoughts and he jumped.

“What?”

“I can see it on your face. You’re thinking of all the reasons it couldn’t work. I’m sure there are plenty of them, but you’re missing the point.”

“Which is?”

“You love them both, and they love you. Alright—” they held their hand up, stalling his retort. “Maybe it isn’t love, not yet, but good as.”

“Not exactly but I see what you mean.”

“Do you? Do you really? Because that is the whole of the point here, Drew. If you care for them and they care for you, the rest is dressing. It’s talking and working together to iron out the details. It’s figuring out what works for you and to hell with anyone else.”

“It’s not—”

“If you say It’s not that easy, I’m going to punch you, and I can because you’ve got your hands full and can’t defend yourself.”

Drew chuckled, not that he doubted Jay meant what they said or that they would be incapable of carrying it through.

“It isn’t though,” he said. “It isn’t that easy. There are other people to think about. What will it do to Amara’s career? What about their family, their friends. No, scratch that, I don’t think I’d have to worry about their friends.”

“And do you really care about their family? Do you care about Julianna?”

Drew snorted. “Only in so far as I’d like to drop kick her over the bars at the Rugby Club.”

“I have no idea what that means, but I figure we’re on the same page. And as for Henley, I think he’s been a complete dick the whole of their lives, and the minute he walked out of that hospital yesterday, he left behind every right he had to be involved from now on. I know these two and they won’t cut him off. They might not even cut Julianna off completely, but neither of them has a hold over the twins anymore. And they certainly don’t have a hold over you, although Julianna’s not going to make it easy. From that perspective I suppose it’s not as easy as that, but I really don’t think you care about her.”

“No, I don’t. As far as I’m concerned, she can do her worse. I don’t care. I’ve ridden out worse. And I’m not afraid of Henley. It’s more… I don’t want the boys to be hurt, and I know what gossips can be like. I’ve read the stories in the tabloids, the way reputations can be ruined. I wouldn’t want to do that to them.”

“Trust me, that isn’t going to be a problem.”

“How do you know?”

Jay laughed aloud. “I’m really going to have to sit you down and make you watch some videos. You can read some fan fiction too, although it might turn your hair white. It’s already out there. You’ve no idea what their fans are like. They don’t just listen to music and watch videos, they get involved. They talk in forums, comment on videos…and they write fan fiction. There are as many fan fics shipping you with one of the twins as there are shipping them together, and a fair few include all three. Although I have to admit they kind of assume that Aria will change into… Well there are various things they have him changing into—principally kittens, I have to say—but they can get pretty raunchy.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Drew was genuinely confused, having understood less than half of what they were saying.

“Fan fiction. Fans write stories, sometimes even novels, about the lives of their favourite characters, animes, and celebrities. Shipping means putting the into a romantic relationship.”

“So,” Drew said slowly, “there are stories out there, that anyone can read, about me and…either or both? And…”

“Twincest is a big thing at the moment. They’re popular in fan fic—reading and writing.”

“No, just no. I am not going to look for those stories.”

“Why not? The twins and I love them.”

“Oh god,” Drew groaned. “What have I got myself involved with?”

“The future, darling.”

“Way to go to make me feel old.”

“Don’t worry, once Aria gives you a makeover and Amara blows the cobwebs away we’ll soon knock the old out of you.”

“Yeah right, I’m— Wait. What do you mean, makeover?”

“How do you feel about wearing a dress?” Jay asked, their gaze shrewd and tone serious.

Drew snorted. “Now I know you’re insane.”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Jay eyed him thoughtfully. “You’re a bit broad on the shoulders but I’ll bet you’ve got the legs for it. I could find you an outfit that you’d really rock.”

“Yeah, no. Not happening. Not ever happening.”

“Stockings and suspenders? High heels? Hot pants?”

“No, no and definitely not. I’m not that kind of guy. They take me as I am or not at all.”

Jay nodded, a smirk on their lips.

“I think you’d look lovely in a nice, black court. Maybe a bit of lace here and here. You don’t have the deportment to carry off a dress. Maybe they can work on you a bit.”

“Mam!” Drew was horrified. His mother grinned unashamedly then nibbled delicately on a welshcake. Jay snorted crumbs.

Drew was distracted when Aria started to shake in his arms. It took him a moment to realize he was laughing.