' Live-Poets Society ' – A Corner For Poetry

[Aditus]

Thank you, Parker, Tim, dughlas, Def, Val, Emi and AC! I feel confident now to submit the poem to the Love is Love Poetry anthology.

[Aditus]

Help me, my dear fine Live Poets...

 

I wrote this a couple years ago; it may be suitable for the Love is Love anthology, but I am very uncertain. It seems a bit personal to me, so any feedback you have about its suitability for submission will be highly appreciated. Thx <3 <3 <3   

 

 

Why do we have a brain, if not to think –

Why a heart, if not to have it broken,

And so common wisdom would have us sink

To the state that nothing can be spoken.

Frustrated and sad that they can't let us be;

That a boy-loving boy is no big deal,

And there's no point in denying what they see,

That people join because of what they feel.

So if I ask you to take my hand now –

So if for your love I ask forever,

Will you sanctify blessings to avow

That love is love, despite all endeavor? 

Heart and mind, the universe in us beats,

And in measure all enmity defeats.

Yes it's personal, but why should that be bad? You even mention the anthology title. Perfectly suitable IMO.

[dughlas]

Help me, my dear fine Live Poets...

 

I wrote this a couple years ago; it may be suitable for the Love is Love anthology, but I am very uncertain. It seems a bit personal to me, so any feedback you have about its suitability for submission will be highly appreciated. Thx <3 <3 <3   

 

 

Why do we have a brain, if not to think –

Why a heart, if not to have it broken,

And so common wisdom would have us sink

To the state that nothing can be spoken.

Frustrated and sad that they can't let us be;

That a boy-loving boy is no big deal,

And there's no point in denying what they see,

That people join because of what they feel.

So if I ask you to take my hand now –

So if for your love I ask forever,

Will you sanctify blessings to avow

That love is love, despite all endeavor? 

Heart and mind, the universe in us beats,

And in measure all enmity defeats.

 

AC, I think you should submit it. Yes, it is personal but that's what people need to see that the only difference is in who we love ... and the one we love is different for each. 

[Defiance19]

Help me, my dear fine Live Poets...

 

I wrote this a couple years ago; it may be suitable for the Love is Love anthology, but I am very uncertain. It seems a bit personal to me, so any feedback you have about its suitability for submission will be highly appreciated. Thx <3 <3 <3   

 

 

Why do we have a brain, if not to think –

Why a heart, if not to have it broken,

And so common wisdom would have us sink

To the state that nothing can be spoken.

Frustrated and sad that they can't let us be;

That a boy-loving boy is no big deal,

And there's no point in denying what they see,

That people join because of what they feel.

So if I ask you to take my hand now –

So if for your love I ask forever,

Will you sanctify blessings to avow

That love is love, despite all endeavor? 

Heart and mind, the universe in us beats,

And in measure all enmity defeats.

This is perfect for submission.. Perfect.. 

[Mikiesboy]

Help me, my dear fine Live Poets...

 

I wrote this a couple years ago; it may be suitable for the Love is Love anthology, but I am very uncertain. It seems a bit personal to me, so any feedback you have about its suitability for submission will be highly appreciated. Thx <3 <3 <3   

 

 

Why do we have a brain, if not to think –

Why a heart, if not to have it broken,

And so common wisdom would have us sink

To the state that nothing can be spoken.

Frustrated and sad that they can't let us be;

That a boy-loving boy is no big deal,

And there's no point in denying what they see,

That people join because of what they feel.

So if I ask you to take my hand now –

So if for your love I ask forever,

Will you sanctify blessings to avow

That love is love, despite all endeavor? 

Heart and mind, the universe in us beats,

And in measure all enmity defeats.

AC this is perfect for the Anthology .. please submit it.... please!! 

[Emi GS]

Help me, my dear fine Live Poets...

 

I wrote this a couple years ago; it may be suitable for the Love is Love anthology, but I am very uncertain. It seems a bit personal to me, so any feedback you have about its suitability for submission will be highly appreciated. Thx <3 <3 <3

 

 

Why do we have a brain, if not to think –

Why a heart, if not to have it broken,

And so common wisdom would have us sink

To the state that nothing can be spoken.

Frustrated and sad that they can't let us be;

That a boy-loving boy is no big deal,

And there's no point in denying what they see,

That people join because of what they feel.

So if I ask you to take my hand now –

So if for your love I ask forever,

Will you sanctify blessings to avow

That love is love, despite all endeavor?

 

 

Heart and mind, the universe in us beats,

And in measure all enmity defeats.

That definitely gonna suit for the submission. I liked it. And I am no brains to suggest on poetic form or words formation and all. Please submit it... Edited June 18, 2016 by The Eminent MGK

[Parker Owens]

Help me, my dear fine Live Poets...

 

I wrote this a couple years ago; it may be suitable for the Love is Love anthology, but I am very uncertain. It seems a bit personal to me, so any feedback you have about its suitability for submission will be highly appreciated. Thx <3 <3 <3   

 

 

Why do we have a brain, if not to think –

Why a heart, if not to have it broken,

And so common wisdom would have us sink

To the state that nothing can be spoken.

Frustrated and sad that they can't let us be;

That a boy-loving boy is no big deal,

And there's no point in denying what they see,

That people join because of what they feel.

So if I ask you to take my hand now –

So if for your love I ask forever,

Will you sanctify blessings to avow

That love is love, despite all endeavor? 

Heart and mind, the universe in us beats,

And in measure all enmity defeats.

 

This is immense. Please submit it for the anthology. 

[northie]

 

I was reading this thread yesterday not quite understanding what was being discussed, then I read Cazpedroso's blog post this morning and it became so much clearer.

 

I would buy this compilation from a strong sense of obligation but to have it contain contributions from some of the authors I admire here only adds to the reasons to buy.    The proposed contributions from AC and Adi take my breath away. 

 

This is as good a place as any to say the following: I look on in wonderment at your creativity (poetry, prose, whatever) and your hard work. My primary reason for joining GA was so I could respond to what I was reading and have conversations  - both things I'm really enjoying.   

 

[exits through side door ...]

Edited June 18, 2016 by northie

[Parker Owens]

 

 

I was reading this thread yesterday not quite understanding what was being discussed, then I read Cazpedroso's blog post this morning and it became so much clearer.

 

I would buy this compilation from a strong sense of obligation but to have it contain contributions from some of the authors I admire here only adds to the reasons to buy.    The proposed contributions from AC and Adi take my breath away. 

 

This is as good a place as any to say the following: I look on in wonderment at your creativity (poetry, prose, whatever) and your hard work. My primary reason for joining GA was so I could respond to what I was reading and have conversations  - both things I'm really enjoying.   

 

[exits through side door ...]

 

 

I add my sincere amen to your comments....

[northie]

I add my sincere amen to your comments....

 

My last paragraph included you as much as anyone else, Parker. 

[AC Benus]

By the way, for all who read and offered comments on my Love is Love poem, I have submitted it, and it's been accepted for the anthology.

 

Thanks for all your support and feedback. I love this Live-Poets community. Kisses for all! 

<3 <3 <3

[AC Benus]

 

 

I was reading this thread yesterday not quite understanding what was being discussed, then I read Cazpedroso's blog post this morning and it became so much clearer.

 

I would buy this compilation from a strong sense of obligation but to have it contain contributions from some of the authors I admire here only adds to the reasons to buy.    The proposed contributions from AC and Adi take my breath away. 

 

This is as good a place as any to say the following: I look on in wonderment at your creativity (poetry, prose, whatever) and your hard work. My primary reason for joining GA was so I could respond to what I was reading and have conversations  - both things I'm really enjoying.   

 

[exits through side door ...]

 

Northie - you better be coming back to Live-Poets on a regular basis Post a poem you love, we'd all love to see it

[Mikiesboy]

By the way, for all who read and offered comments on my Love is Love poem, I have submitted it, and it's been accepted for the anthology.

 

Thanks for all your support and feedback. I love this Live-Poets community. Kisses for all! 

<3 <3 <3

Oh kisses...yay! Congratulations on your poem being selected ... never doubted it!

[dughlas]

By the way, for all who read and offered comments on my Love is Love poem, I have submitted it, and it's been accepted for the anthology.

 

Thanks for all your support and feedback. I love this Live-Poets community. Kisses for all! 

<3 <3 <3

I'm not surprised, it's beautiful. Congrats!

[Emi GS]

By the way, for all who read and offered comments on my Love is Love poem, I have submitted it, and it's been accepted for the anthology.

Thanks for all your support and feedback. I love this Live-Poets community. Kisses for all!

<3 <3 <3

Oh!!! Kisses, Finally. :kiss: :kiss: :kiss: .... and so on. I won't stop until the counts reach to the count of kisses to My Fairy Tail. *whispering* Which are infinite anyway... *whispering*

 

[Valkyrie]

I'm hoping to come up with something for the poetry anthology, but haven't been able to 'go there' in my head yet.  Congrats to all who have successfully contributed so far.

[Parker Owens]

By the way, for all who read and offered comments on my Love is Love poem, I have submitted it, and it's been accepted for the anthology.

 

Thanks for all your support and feedback. I love this Live-Poets community. Kisses for all! 

<3 <3 <3

Felicitations...it will be a great addition to the anthology!

[Emi GS]

I'm hoping to come up with something for the poetry anthology, but haven't been able to 'go there' in my head yet.  Congrats to all who have successfully contributed so far.

Don't worry Val, you are not the only one was without anything for so long. I just got my idea yesterday and still haven't submitted.

[Valkyrie]

I've got a poem I'd like opinions on.  Please don't hesitate to give constructive criticism.  I can take it.  Do Haiku typically have titles?  If so I would title it "Pulse".  

 

Evil infiltrates

Terrified hearts fall silent

A rainbow appears

[AC Benus]

I've got a poem I'd like opinions on.  Please don't hesitate to give constructive criticism.  I can take it.  Do Haiku typically have titles?  If so I would title it "Pulse".  

 

Evil infiltrates

Terrified hearts fall silent

A rainbow appears

Oh... i know the image...just saw it a couple days ago - a beautiful rainbow appeared over the club as the investigation continues...

[dughlas]

I've got a poem I'd like opinions on.  Please don't hesitate to give constructive criticism.  I can take it.  Do Haiku typically have titles?  If so I would title it "Pulse".  

 

Evil infiltrates

Terrified hearts fall silent

A rainbow appears

I like it. I was wondering about the rainbow. AC's comment clarified it for me.

[Emi GS]

I've got a poem I'd like opinions on. Please don't hesitate to give constructive criticism. I can take it. Do Haiku typically have titles? If so I would title it "Pulse".

Evil infiltrates

Terrified hearts fall silent

A rainbow appears

Ok, because of the heartfelt feeling, your poem looks such great. Personally I liked it. And its really touched my heart.

 

But coming to form you selected, it might not correct(only according to the form). A Haiku is exact description of a situation. A constructive image. We tell what we see. Not that what we feel. We can't see emotions. We can only see the result of emotion. I will give you an example. If you see an old man tired, how can we tell that!!! Dripping sweat, dull face... and like that. I hope you understand.

Me too getting about it recently. And its difficult to tell what you see, without feeling about it. Please Correct me if I am wrong. Me too learning it.

Edited June 21, 2016 by The Eminent MGK

[Valkyrie]

Ok, because of the heartfelt feeling, your poem looks such great. Personally I liked it. And its really touched my heart.

 

But coming to form you selected, it might not correct(only according to the form). A Haiku is exact description of a situation. A constructive image. We tell what we see. Not that what we feel. We can't see emotions. We can only see the result of emotion. I will give you an example. If you see an old man tired, how can we tell that!!! Dripping sweat, dull face... and like that. I hope you understand.

Me too getting about it recently. And its difficult to tell what you see, without feeling about it. Please Correct me if I am wrong. Me too learning it.

I saw a definition of Haiku that described it as "short poems that use sensory language to capture a feeling or image", which is why I went for a more modern take using feelings vs. imagery.  I can rework it if it doesn't work as is. 

[Emi GS]

Evil infiltrates

Terrified hearts fall silent

A rainbow appears

 

I can see your point of you. But hear you recalling about a place all occurred and infused it with the rainbow you are presently seeing. Which not fulfil the form.

 

Evilness suffused

where afraid souls fall silent

A rainbow appears

 

Don't mind me with hijacking your poem( ), but here you are telling about a place where all those things had happened.

 

Get it!!!???

[dughlas]

Unless others suggest differently I would leave it as first written. Poetry in all its forms is a tool of expression. The thing that most kept me from poetry was an insistence on knowing and following esoteric rules. Does what you've written express what you intended ... if so it is not wrong. As AC has reminded us before western poets do not write haiku in the "correct" more fluid form of Japanese poets because our langauge structure is different so borrowing the structure of the form should be accepted. I am enamored of the cinquain ever since I found it and shared it with this group. Parker wrote one a bit ago that at first reading seemed off to my perception of the form. Please note it was "my" preconceived idea that was at fault. Parker explained why he wrote the way he did and suddenly the light shifted and I saw what he had done ... it was wonderful. So all that said ... do what feels right for your soul.