Cards on the Table - 15. Chapter 15 Full House

Chapter 15

Michael was diligently doing his knee exercises as Kendall covertly observed his progress, struggling to appear nonchalant. It wasn’t working. Fortunately, he wasn’t able to see his partner’s secret little smile, that broad back towards Kendall as Michael sat on the edge of the bed. Kendall fiddled around, reorganizing the already organized dresser drawer that was open, pretending he wasn’t there to make sure Michael didn’t overdo it. Reading the rehab instruction papers numerous times that morning had made the itch to get right in there and oversee Michael’s progress, very strong.

There wasn’t the occasional twinge of pain warned about by the therapist, and that made Michael feel very confident in the fact that, like with every other injury he had in the past, this one would heal quickly too. He was being very careful though, partly out of fear of Kendall’s reaction if he screwed up. Michael grinned at the thought that maybe he was already whipped. It was time to take pity on his partner though, and ask for his assistance with the last stationary exercise.

“Babe, could you help me with this one?” In the blink of an eye, Kendall was at the bedside, ready to lend a hand.

“Sure thing. Do you want me to support your heel while you pull your knee upwards?”

“Are you reciting the instructions? How did you know what exercise I was doing? I thought you were busy over there doing your own thing,” he said innocently.

“Smartass. You know I was watching you. I’m trying but it’s hard not to worry about you. I do love you, you know.”

“I know you love me, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. You know what to do better than I do, so let’s get this one done.”

Supporting Michael’s left heel lightly as he pulled slowly upward, Kendall ensured the stability of motion the entire way up and down. Ten times they did this, and both were relieved there were no warning signs to stop.

“That’s it, Babe. I think that went really well.”

“It seems to have. So you didn’t get any twinges at all?”

“Not a one. It was clear sailing the whole time with each exercise, as I’m sure you saw for yourself.”

Kendall ignored Michael’s smug look. “Well, in two hours we have to start checking for any swelling or tenderness, and that will let us know for sure if your knee is handling the exercises the way it should.”

“Yes, Doctor Dooley,” Michael snickered. “That’s got a nice ring to it. Maybe you could dress up as a doctor sometime and I could be your patient… one with a big swelling in his nether regions, like the one that’s happening as we speak.”

“Not again, man? You’re a walking hard-on.”

“Actually, I’m a sitting hard-on, but what do you expect when your hand is still on my leg. It’s your fault. You were touching me and you know what happens when you touch me.”

“I was helping with your exercises, and being a good Doctor Dooley.”

“Tell that to my dick. Oh… are we playing doctor and swollen patient, now?”

“I guess we are, Mr. Aceto. Now, if you will come with me, I am prescribing you a shower and a blowjob. That should relieve the swelling, at least temporarily.” And it did, as Dr. Dooley went above and beyond the call of duty. The patient was so appreciative, he returned the favor, and booked a follow-up appointment.

Completely sated, they found their way back to the bed for a little respite, holding hands and resting their foreheads against one another, eyes closed, perfectly content with each other’s company. Michael knew though, that Kendall was holding something in.

“Do you want to talk about it now?”

Pulling his forehead off of Michael’s, Kendall was able to look into the depths of those now open blue eyes, eyes that made him feel safe. “He's always driven me crazy, and he’s still doing it. I’ve never been this kind of happy in my whole life, and with his typical timing he’s trying to ruin it for me.”

“Babe, there’s nothing he can do that will ruin us… we won’t let him. I know you’re upset, but he’s not doing this on purpose. Don’t let him get to you. Whatever you have to deal with, with him or anything else, you’re not alone anymore. We’re a team, and he is just a sick old man. He can’t hurt you, and he can’t hurt us. You know that, right? He doesn’t control any part of your life, and he hasn’t for a very long time. Only we control us.”

A small smile escaped Kendall’s frowning face. “How do you always know the right thing to say? I was feeling like that powerless little boy again, and you knew that, didn’t you?”

Michael could feel Kendall’s whispered breath on his face, as he looked into those troubled turquoise eyes. “I’ve seen him do it to you before, but I also saw you fight him and win. You stood up to him, and went toe to toe. I watched what it did to you, and that was hard, but you forged ahead and you haven’t looked back. You’re stronger now... maybe the strongest person I know. I’ve watched everything you’ve done since we finished our education. I saw you get rejected because of a stupid numbers game, yet you didn’t let it get you down. You put your strengths to work, against all that pressure from your father. You didn’t cave once, and now you have this amazing career going. I am so proud of you, and the fact that your father says otherwise doesn’t mean shit. You get that, right?”

“I do now. I knew it, but I guess I needed to hear it from you. I love you so much, and you’re right, he can’t hurt us. Somewhere, down deep, I guess I still want his approval even though I know I won’t get it… but I don’t need it. I certainly don’t need it for us.”

“Kendall, no matter what happens with his cancer, he doesn’t need to know about us. Why put yourself through that, especially now.”

Kendall stared into Michael’s eyes seeing the total devotion and commitment there. “What was it you said yesterday? Before we went to the police station to update your file?”

“I don’t recall. I probably said a lot of things.”

“Well, I do. You said we were in this together, and you weren’t going to hide for or from anyone.”

“Do you remember all my pearls of wisdom?”

“There’s only been a couple of them, so it’s easy.”

They both smiled at that as Michael said, “Jerk.”

“Why would you expect less of me… for me to feel differently about us?”

“It’s not that. I know how you feel, but I don’t want to see you go through coming out to a man who probably can’t accept it anyway.”

“I love you for saying that, I really do, but I’m not going to do this for my dad. I’m doing it for us because we have nothing to be ashamed of. We don’t need anyone’s approval or acceptance for how we feel about each other or the commitment we have. It’s the right thing to do for us.”

Michael had to work to keep his emotions in check, at Kendall’s declaration. “So does this mean you’ve decided what you, what we are doing?

“I guess I have. I want to go see my father, and I want you at my side.”

“I’m already there, Babe.”

The next few days were a whirlwind as Kendall arranged their trip to Alberta. Their final destination was a bedroom community just east of Calgary, a twenty minute drive from the airport depending on traffic. Of major concern was Michael’s knee. He insisted he would be fine for the plane ride, but Kendall needed verification from the physical therapist. They managed to obtain an appointment on Friday to discuss the possibility, and the general consensus was that Michael was handling the rehab extremely well. His mobility had increased to the point where a plane ride was not considered a problem, and a conversation with the airline insured Michael would be given a seat at the rear of the plane which would allow for extension of his left leg. Satisfied there would be no real hardship to the knee, Kendall went ahead and booked their flight for Monday, allowing for two more days of rehab and healing time.

Informing his employers at the head office of the situation brought sympathy and understanding. They wouldn’t allow him to use vacation time for his trip, instead classifying it as a family emergency, covered by a separate benefit, and ordered him not to worry about anything involving his work. They would have someone to assist Jeremy if necessary. Deciding the time was right to inform them of his new domestic situation, he was pleasantly surprised to be met with congratulations. They agreed to update his personal information immediately, and Michael could sign the necessary forms when they returned from Calgary. They were treating their golden boy right.

The flight to Calgary was quick and uneventful. Michael was completely comfortable, able to rest a lot more weight on his foot. “Are you nervous?” They were disembarking at the time, and Kendall had been unusually quiet during the flight.

“Yeah, about you falling on your ass. Slow down, would you?” Kendall looked distracted.

Michael wasn’t fooled. “Are you going to talk to me, or are you going to deflect?”

“What do you want from me, Ace? I have a lot on my mind right now.”

“I understand that, and I want to help you, to be there for you. You’re shutting down, and if you need to, then that’s okay. I don’t want to push you, but you didn’t say much yesterday, and you haven’t said much this morning. You worry about me falling on my ass. I worry about the pressure you’re putting yourself under.”

“I’m sorry… you’re right. Let’s just get our bags and pick up our rental car, and I promise I will stop shutting you out.”

Michael’s response was a warm, loving smile that lent Kendall some much needed strength.

The rental was a big SUV that could handle the snow and provide Michael with lots of leg room. They headed out towards the Trans-Canada Highway after Kendall had run their bags up to their room at the Airport Days Inn.

“I am nervous, Michael, but I guess you knew that already?”

“Well, it’s kind of understandable. This is a big deal to you and to me. I get that we’re probably headed into hostile territory, but we’re in this together. Please don’t think you have to hide anything from me. I know you and I know you think you should protect me, but don’t, okay? I don’t want you to worry about me. We’ll protect each other if we need to.”

“You don’t know what he’s like. He can be a venomous prick and I don’t want that spilling over on to you. I’m starting to think this is a very bad idea. He is going to be hateful, and when I tell him about us, there’s no telling what he’ll do or say.”

“Just fucking breathe, man. I don’t give a rat’s ass what he does or says! He can’t hurt us if we don’t let him. He is just a man.” Michael softened his voice. “Listen to me; this is for you, not him. You are being the better man here. You’re being a good son coming to visit his sick father. It’s on him what he does. If he wants to be a prick, let him. You’re making an attempt where a lot of sons wouldn’t, and I'm proud of you for doing it. I imagine this will mean a lot to your mom, so just think of that. You have no relationship with your dad now, so how can it get any worse?”

“When did you get so smart?” Kendall looked much calmer now.

“I have my moments. See, I’m in love with this amazing man who brings out the best in me every day… he’s the smart one… and he’s hot as fuck.”

Kendall burst out laughing, forgetting what awaited him for the time being. “I can always count on you, horn-dog. Thank you.” He glanced over for a second. “You’re hot as fuck, too.”

“You’re welcome, and I know,” he said with pretended arrogance. That earned another laugh from Kendall. Mission accomplished.

They were quiet for a few minutes as the big vehicle ate up some of the highway, but it was a different kind of quiet. That sense of almost panic was gone. Michael could tell a more rational Kendall was thinking. The little boy had been replaced by the man. Michael waited patiently for him to speak.

“I received another email from Aunt Tess last night. Dad is going to need a colostomy bag after surgery and he's pretty devastated by it. He isn’t talking to anyone. He knows we’re coming but he won’t say anything. Tess says he goes back in the hospital on Wednesday and gets operated on Thursday morning. The cancer is in the wall of his bowel so they'll have to remove a big section, and they won’t be able to reconnect it to the rectum. They’re going to remove healthy tissue as well to give him a better chance. All the lymph nodes near it could be affected so they’re taking them too. It sounds bad.”

“Yeah, it does, but he has a chance. All you can do is hold onto that.”

“You know it’s funny. There were times I wouldn’t have cared if he died. Part of me might have even wished it when things got really bad, you know? He could be so cold and hard. I’ve always wondered why he was like that. But now, as much as I don’t like the man, I want him to live. I may not want to be around him, but I don’t want him gone for good. I think a part of me always hoped he would change, and become a real dad. You would make a great dad.”

Michael responded to the tears trickling down Kendall’s cheeks with a few of his own. “You would be an amazing dad, Babe. Maybe we’ll get a chance to be dads one day.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I think I would like that.” Kendall was smiling again.

“Me too.”

The town of Chestermere was picturesque, even in the deep freeze of winter. The lake was its centerpiece, and in the summer, the yacht club flourished. While Michael was somewhat entranced with the town of some fourteen-thousand people, Kendall was too intent on his destination to absorb the familiarity of the town proper. The neighborhood of Lakepointe was his goal, and the sigh he released when they pulled into the charming Dooley residence was explosive.

“I’m with you, Babe.”

“I know. I couldn’t do this without you. I’d still be back in Ontario.” The front door opened as he said that, initiating a deep calming breath. “I love you.”

“Ditto. Rock and roll.”

Agnes Dooley was a stunning woman, blonde hair lightly streaked with gray, and the same turquoise eyes as her son. The slight Scottish lilt to her voice was charming as she welcomed the newly introduced Michael into her home, beaming at the presence of her long lost son. Once inside, she reached up to hold on to him, her shoulders shaking with emotion and her eyes letting out tears. “I’ve missed you so much, my sweet, sweet child. Thank you for coming to see us. I know you’re a busy man, with a career. Please don’t mind your father, Kendall… he’s not himself.”

“I’ve missed you too. I wanted to come... for you. You don’t have to make excuses for Dad. I know he doesn’t want me here.”

Michael watched this exchange with great interest, and could tell that Kendall’s mom was already anticipating trouble.

“Och, your father doesn’t know what he wants. He’s a very sick man, so just put up with his foolishness, okay? He’s sleeping right now. He’s doing a lot of that lately.”

“Always the peacemaker, Mom. Don’t worry, I know how the game is played. Now, how are you doing? Are you handling everything by yourself?”

“It’s not easy, but I’m managing. Tessa helps me a lot, and there’s a neighborhood group that pitches in if I need anything. Your father’s in for a rough time and he’s not dealing with it so well.”

“Mom, Michael needs to get off his feet because of his knee. Can we get him settled and then we can talk?”

“Oh yes, certainly, dear. Let’s go in the living room and he can stretch out on the couch. Sorry, Michael, to keep you standing like this.”

“It’s fine, Mrs. Dooley. Kendall just worries too much,” he smiled warmly at this woman who reminded him so much of his partner.

“Yes, he’s always been that way. He was such a lovely, sweet-natured boy. Follow me and we’ll put his mind at ease.”

Michael’s smirk got him an eye roll from an amused Kendall. Michael was already charming his mother.

Michael looked around the bright cheery room, as Kendall and his mom chattered away. It had a good feel to it, with pictures of Kendall everywhere. He wasn’t sure why that surprised him, but it did. He expected a coldness that just wasn’t there. This room was almost a shrine to Kendall, although grown-up pictures of Kendall seemed to be missing. He clued back into the conversation when he heard the rise in Kendall’s mother’s voice.

“Kendall Dooley, you are not staying in a hotel! This is your home and this is where you belong. There is plenty of room here for you and your friend. You have your old room and the guest room is set up for Michael, already.”

“Mom, there’s something I have to tell you.”

“Kendall, can I talk to you… maybe you can show me your old room?”

“Maybe later. Right now I…”

“No, now, please.”

Agnes watched this exchange with interest as she knew something was going on. Her son looked determined, and his friend looked upset about something. “Kendall, what’s going on? What did you want to tell me? Is there something wrong?”

“I have something I want to tell you and Dad, but there is nothing wrong. You might think there is and Dad definitely will, but I am not going to agree to stay here until you know what it is.” He walked over and sat beside Michael, reaching for his hand. He looked at Michael searchingly. Michael nodded as he took Kendall’s in a warm, comforting grip.

“I need to do this now, without Dad here.” Holding tight to the comforting hand, Kendall continued. “Michael isn’t just my friend, Mom. He’s my partner… my life partner. We love each other, and we’re committed to each other, so if you have a problem with us, let me know now, and we’ll be on our way.” He looked directly into his mother’s eyes, waiting for her reaction. Having Michael beside him gave him all the strength he needed. He watched her absorb the news as her eyes watered, looking from him to Michael and back again, finally coming to rest on their clasped hands.

“Did you think I wouldn’t accept you, Kendall? Have I been that bad of a mother to you, my beautiful son, that you would doubt I love you no matter what? I’m sorry that I didn’t fight more for you than I did. I live with that every day. I should have stood up for you, but I couldn’t have loved my wee lad more than I do. You were such a wonderful child and you deserved better. I know that now, and I see the mistakes I’ve made. If you’ve found happiness with Michael, then I’m happy for you. I don’t expect your father will take it well though, but that’s not what’s important. Thank you for giving me the chance to tell you that. I’ve wondered a long time whether you’d ever let us back in your life again. All I want is to be part of your life… yours and Michael’s now. Can you let go of that handsome man of yours and come over here and hug me? I don’t trust my legs right now.”

Michael felt such happiness at seeing Kendall going over and lifting his mother up into his arms, the love and acceptance visible. It was unexpected, and it was a beautiful thing to watch. He felt the joy radiating from the pair of them, and it infused him too, until he looked over to the entrance of the kitchen and saw the man who was obviously Kendall’s father, staring straight at him.