Tales of the Underground: Blinded - 15. The Swing of Things

I gritted my teeth and pretended to listen to Nancy as she drove the short ride from school to home. I couldn’t even tell you what she was talking about, all I could think about was how scared Curtis was, but how fearless Cam was. Is this how it’s gonna be? Does he have no problem just throwing my business out there? I guess he was trying to help, but I’m not in the Southside anymore…I’m not looking to be in the Southside anymore.

“Everything okay dear?” Nancy asked reaching over to snap me out of my thoughts.

I looked over and nodded “Fine, I’m jus tired.”

“Okay, well make sure to shower and finish your homework before you crash.” She lectured as we pulled into the driveway “and just has a t at the end.”

I glanced over and shook my head “I talk how I talk.”

“We’ll work on it.” She dismissed with a nod of her head. I rolled my eyes but I knew she would hound me about it until it changed. It’s just how she is…when she gets something in her head, well she doesn’t let up. Then again that’s probably why she drives a Bentley and lives in a mansion.

The next morning I was on a mission, I scanned the lockers and hallways until I finally found Cam “Yo” I called out, greeting him with the same handshake we left on yesterday.

“What’s good?” He asked taking a long look at me.

“Nothin, jus think we need to talk bout last night.” I nodded growing serious

He nodded his head to my words “Yeah you played good yesterday. We could be a filthy team if you keep it up.”

“Nah, I don mean the game.” Our eyes locked as I spoke “After the game, when we was speakin to Carter, jus don’t throw my business out there like that.”

He made a face and looked at me as though I was speaking another language “What?”

“Tellin him shit about my past, it’s not how I want to be known around here.” I shrugged, being completely honest with him.

“That wasn’t your past. That was like a month ago.” He clicked dismissing me.

“Yeah that’s the past. I’m not like that anymore.” I dismissed, keeping my eyes focused on his “This is a new start for all of us. We don’t need where we’re from ruinin it.”

He shook his head in disbelief as he heard what I was saying “Look man, you want to keep all that shit on the down low, that’s fine.” He began “but where your from isn’t what’s ruining it for you, it’s who you were.” This time it was my turn to click my teeth and shake my head “You don’t believe me? Well you see me or Curtis having to deal with the same shit? Didn’t think so.”

“Man cut the better than me attitude.” I hissed, starting to get fed up at how long this was taking.

He laughed me off and shrugged his shoulders “I’m not trying to be better than you, but you gotta look at this realistically. You’re the one who rolls with a gang tattoo on your arm. Don’t blame the Southside for choices you made.”

“Choices I made?” I repeated taking a step forward “You don know me like that.”

“See man, this is the type of shit I’m talking about. ” He pointed out leaning back slightly. “You can hide where you’re from, but you can’t hide who you are.” He saw the anger in my eyes and shook his head. He was acting calm, but I could tell there was some degree of fear going on inside of him. “What you gonna fight me or something?”

“Nah, I’m fine, jus expected you to understand this.” I exhaled taking a step back “We’re from the same hood, we should be lookin out for one another, but if you act like you know me…we gonna have problems.”

“Look man, I’ve heard stories about you since we were kids. I may not know you, but I sure as hell know where you’ve been.” He dismissed “I’m not trying to pick a fight here, just trying to help you see what could ruin it for you.”

I reached out and shook his hand the same as when I had walked up “Don let those stories fog your mind, I aint who they say I am.” I nodded “You’ll see.”

“Hope so” he supported, as I began to walk away.

“Hey!” Noah called out as I walked by his locker “What was that about?”

“Basketball” I lied trying to keep my pace

“Really? I totally thought you guys were going to fight.” He laughed following along.

“Nah we cool.” I shrugged “Just had to get in one another’s face about some shit, guess that’s how it has to be sometimes.”

“Oh good!” he decided as we reached my locker “You get scary when you’re like that.”

“Shut up Noah” I clicked packing my bag for all my morning classes.

He made a face and leaned against the locker next to mine “You don’t like me very much do you?”

“Why you sayin that?” I groaned not in the mood for the drama.

“You always tell me to shut up.” He shrugged keeping his eyes on me.

“Cause you’re always sayin stupid shit.” I sighed with the shake of my head “It doesn mean I don’t like you, I’m jus honest.”

“So we’re friends then?” he led fueled by another motive.

I peered at him through the corner of my eyes and grew serious “What do you want?”

He let out a nervous giggle and cautiously moved back “Why do you think I want something?”

“Noah” I hissed shutting the locker and turning towards him.

“Okay fine, go on a double date with me, Ashley and Nicole.” He smiled as his plan finally unfolded.

“Shut up Noah.” I dismissed heading towards the gym.

“Come on!” he pleaded “If you’re my friend you’ll do this for me.”

“If you’re my friend you’ll stop.” I shot back done with how the morning had been going.

“Fine.” He grumbled walking past me and heading into the locker room.

“Oooo someone upset Noah.” Carter giggled as he got a firsthand look at the conversation “So what happened?”

“He wanted me to go on a double date with him, Ashley and Nicole.” I exhaled

Carter shrugged his shoulders and started slowly walking with me “Go for it.” I shot him a stunned look and shook my head “It’s okay, you’re doing it for him, I get it.”

“I don’t want to.” I mumbled with my head down.

“Alright, then don’t.” he supported “but that means you have to go on a date with me.”

I looked up and shot him a nasty look “I ain’t goin on a date with you.”

“Okay, then we’ll call it something different.” He smiled “Look, it’s me or Noah. You’re not going to sit home all weekend.”

“I wont be, we got a scrimmage Friday.” I exhaled feeling Carter take all the leverage.

“And Saturday you’ll be going out to dinner with me.” He ordered in a serious tone. I let out a long sigh as he ran his shoulders into mine “Or you’ll be single.” He teased breaking the serious tone in his voice.

“Fine.” I muttered “But you can’t tell no one.”

“Okay, I’ll tell everyone.” He giggled taking advantage of my poor speech.

“I hate you.” I exhaled shaking my head.

I’d be lying if I said that the idea of a date with Carter didn’t make me nervous…I guess it shouldn’t, especially after everything I’ve done…yet I can’t stop thinking about it. What am I going to wear? What do I talk about? How do I act? I mean I’ve seen it done with girls a million times before…if this was a date with a girl, well I’d make it to 3^rd base within the first hour…but this is Carter…how the hell do I handle this?

“Would you stop?” Aaron frustratedly yelped as I waved my foot back and forth causing the bedframe to squeak “You’re driving me insane!”

“Oh my bad.” I exhaled, sitting up and turning towards him. No surprise another night, another 3 hours Aaron spent studying. “Hey I got a question.”

“Yes, I’m studying.” He sighed “and no I don’t need you to make fun of me for it right now. I have so many tests this week.”

“Alright” I softly laughed “but it ain’t about that…how bad would it be for me to talk to Carter bout where I’ve been?”

“We’ve had this conversation already.” He dismissed throwing himself right back into the book he was reading.

I threw back my head and let out a long grown “Why is it such a bad thing?”

“Why do you have to tell him? I get it, you two are close, but would it really be all that bad if you kept something from him?” he looked over, finally putting the book down.

“That’s the thing though, I don know if I can keep it from him.” I let out as our eyes connected “The Southside guys on the team almost blew it, and there’s no way Coach doesn’t know! He’s from that area too…and the way he talks to me…well it’s jus a matter of time.”

“Hold on.” Aaron paused with the tilt of his head “How many people know about your record?”

I shrugged my shoulders and leaned back “I was a high rankin gang member…not to mention people used to talk about me when I was jus stealin to survive. Guess people used the idea of a kid jumping from rooftops to create our own kind of legend.”

“Oh that’s not so bad.” Aaron nodded “He already knows you were a gang member, and he knows you’re really good at climbing. So what if he hears…”

“That’s not all they talk bout.” I grumbled looking at my arm “They talk bout how I used to have store owners terrorized, bring up my old nicknames…the bad ones.”

“The bad ones?” Aaron repeated with an eye raise.

“Yeah the bad ones.” I admitted in defeat.

I saw concern fill his eyes as he processed it “Just how notorious were you?” he let out “Like if someone went to the Southside, how easy would it be for them hear about this?”

“Why?” I sat up, seeing through his question.

“Nothing, I’m just wondering if one of us…”

“Why would Carter be in the Southside?” I interrupted.

“I never said him, I’m just saying if one of us…”

“Aaron, don’t lie bout it.” I growled trying to use intimidation “Where does Carter go?”

“Nowhere.” He breathed looking down at the book in front of him “Sorry I tried to help.”

“Really man?” I clicked “That’s how you’re gonna play this?”

“What do you want me to say?” he argued looking back “It’s not my place to tell you about Carter. If he trusts you then he’ll tell you.”

“So then he doesn trust me?” I let out thinking it over.

“I never said that.” He shook “Look Carter’s tricky like that. He acts like all his cards are on the table…but he’s learned how to hide the dark parts of his life, and I really don’t blame him.”

I felt a scowl grow on my face as it all hit me “Why you know bout it?”

“Because I’ve known him since we were in prek.” Aaron informed turning away “He’s my best friend, there’s nothing I don’t know about him.”

“Does he like me as much as he pretends too…or is it just…”

“Don’t even finish that question!” Aaron interrupted with some force in his voice “In fact I’m not even going to answer that! After how much time you two have spent together, well if you doubt his intentions, then you two will never be close.”

“Alright shit.” I finished turning away “Didn’t have to yell at me for it.”

“Yes I did.” Aaron provoked with a sigh “You’re being so annoying tonight.”

“You’re the one who wanted a younger brother.” I pointed out not bothering to turn over.

“I know” he breathed trying to get some quiet. A minute or two passed by before I heard him stand up from the chair and walk around the room. Suddenly I felt a force land down on my arm “Just don’t forget who the older brother is.”

I popped up as he quickly made his way out of the room “Get back here!” I shouted “You such a pussy!”

“Riley!” Nancy shouted from down the hallway “Watch your language!”

“Yeah watch your language!” Aaron repeated in satisfied tone.

“Aaron stop provoking your brother.” Walter dismissed in a tired voice “If he takes a swing at you I’m not breaking it up.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at the exchange…man I never imagine I’d be living a life like this…yet here I am. Fighting with my brother…getting in trouble from parents…it feels good. I moved my glasses from the mattress to the edge of Aaron’s nearby desk, and closed my eyes as I felt fatigue take over my body. I feel good…I feel safe.

The rest of the week flowed by in the blink of an eye…yet I couldn’t help but look at Carter carefully. Every gym period…every lunch period…during practice, and even on the ride home…why would he be in the Southside? What would he do there? I just…I don’t get it! I’ll piece it together, I know I will.

“Stop thinking so much.” Carter interrupted as I stood in the warm up line before the scrimmage “You’ve missed your last 2 layups.”

“Sorry.” I shook “Jus distracted.”

“Well cut it out!” he shouted giving me a friendly shove “Loosen up. You have to earn that starting spot.”

“It’d be easier to loosen up if they played music…man with all this money this school has they can’t get an ipod or something?”

“They’ll play music when the season actually starts.” Carter explained “You’ll see. It’s a completely different atmosphere.”

“Probably play some rich white shit.” I groaned “They better bump some yeezy, or Jay or somethin!”

“Better be some yeezy.” Curtis supported from behind us“Maybe some Chance.”

“Man you know Chance ain’t basketball music.” I clicked looking back at him “Now drake, he could work.”

“This man knows his music.” Cam supported overhearing the conversation as he ran past us.

Carter shot me a confused look as he shook his head “Who is yeezy?”

I let out a long groan before catching a basketball and pulling up for a shot “Kanye.” I informed nodding my head as the ball swished through the hoop.

“West?” Carter asked repeating the motion I had just taken.

“Man how many Kanyes you know?” I dismissed getting back on line.

“Alright geez!” he defended “Sorry I asked! If you three want that type of music you need to go tell the score keeper, he runs the music around here.”

“I’ll get him a playlist.” Curtis added getting on line behind us.

“Many you lost that right when you said Chance was basketball music.” I shook looking at Cam on the line across from us.

“I’ll make it” he nodded taking the responsibility from the rest of us

Finally Coach blew the whistle and waved us into the huddle “Who the hell is Chance?” Carter questioned as we left him alone in line.

Just like in the first game Coach sat me for the first half, but as the halfway point in the 3^rd buzzed he waved me over “Alright down by 15, think you could take the lead if I let you play the rest of the game?”

“Flow the ball through me and I can make it close.” I confidently responded watching the pay breaking down.

Coach nodded his head and pointed at the point guard “Sub in at the next stoppage.”

I followed the directions and finally got my first chance to actually play with Carter. Even with all these practices and try outs I haven’t been able to actually run plays with him…to see where our chemistry is at. I slowly nodded my head as I made my way up the court, Carter just a few strides ahead of me. As he looked back I quickly waved him to the left and broke to the right. As we crossed our defenders collided and I quickly unloaded a 3.

“Jus watch me baby!” I shouted at my teammates “I got this!”

“Cy!” Coach reprimanded from the sidelines “Watch yourself.”

I laughed to myself before finally getting serious. Tonight I was in the zone, I finally had more than just 10 minutes, and I was showing what I could do when I heated up. Last game was nothing compared to tonight. I was overflowing with confidence as every shot I took dropped, as every pass reached its mark.

Although me and Carter’s chemistry…well it needed work. “Man don jus watch the ball!” I reprimanded at our failed attempt to connect, especially after such a great cross over and kick out…what did he do? Just stand there watching the move, not even considering I would pass!

“Alright, relax” he dismissed “It could’ve been more on target.”

I shook my head and zoned him out as I got back on defense. Even with me and Carter not clicking…well we both found our way to make a big impact. As the 4^th reached the halfway mark Coach threw in the rest of the bench to support me. For a second I swear he considered resting me, but I guess his curiosity to see how long I could sustain such a high level prevailed. Little did he know I don’t let up….in the Southside you only get to keep on a court so long as you win. There are so many other pick up teams waiting to play…such long lines…well you need to keep winning if you want to keep playing…you get tired, you slip up even once, you ran the risk of not playing for the rest of the day! That thinking, that style…it translated even here. I need to win to keep playing…win to prove myself…win to show I aint just some other white boy.

I couldn’t help but to excitedly slam my hand against my head as the last second ticked away. Curtis stood up and grabbed me by the jersey catching onto the excitement “Man! You vicious!” he yelped shoving me away “We gonna have fun this year!”

“You pulled through with your promise” Coach nodded pointing at the scoreboard “pulled us ahead by 10 and sealed the win.”

I shrugged and nodded my head “The more minutes I get, well the better I’ll play.”

“Keep earning them then.” He supported “Nothing is going to be handed to you.”

“I don expect it to be.” I replied with a strong voice. He nodded in approval before going to talk to some of the other played.

“Woh” Aaron gasped climbing to the bottom of the bleachers “That was crazy! I’m sorry I missed the other game!”

“You should be!” Carter teased giving me a playful push.

“Please don’t feed his ego.” Walter exhaled walking past us as he headed to the door “It’ll be bad enough once Nancy hears about it.”

“I can’t wait to tell her!” Aaron let out following his dad “I got some good videos too.” His voice drifted as it got further.

“We would’ve won by more if someone didn’t have butter fingers.” I provoked looking over at Carter.

He shook his head as our eyes connected “You know those passes were off!”

“Keep tellin yourself that.” I smiled grabbing my bag off the floor. He giggled to himself as he carefully watched me. “What?” I muttered shooting him a worried look.

“Nothing” he laughed “You better bring better chemistry tomorrow night.”

“Wasn’t my chemistry!” I defended beginning to walk away.

“I’m more than willing to put that to the test!” he teased knowing the right buttons to press.

“Nasty ass!” I remarked picking up the pace “You’re lucky I’m still goin!”

I heard his laugh ring through the gym as I finally reached the door “See you tomorrow” he let out in a playful tone.

I shook my head again and let the doors slam behind me. Tomorrow…its going to be something new…something different….just like every other time I’m forced into a situation I’m not comfortable in…but at least I want to be in this one, at least it’s with him. I yanked my glasses out of my bag and looked back through the window at the slim teen carefully packing his bag. His brown hair reaching a blonde point at the top of his head…yeah…I do what to be in this one.