Please don't hate me... I promise TJ will be on a better path soon.
I opened my eyes and saw it was Beau.
I smiled and closed my eyes. He was always the sensitive one.
While I loved to sing and dance, Beau was the family Brainiac. He excelled in Math and Science and rumor has it that MIT and a few other universities are already courting him and he’s a junior.
Ever since Beau and Grayson were little one or both of them would sneak into my room at night. I always enjoyed their company. I expected it to end as they got older but they kept coming.
I woke to see Beau staring at me.
“We need to talk.” He said
“Sure bud what’s on your mind?”
“I need you to promise not to be angry with me.”
“This is some serious stuff then. Go ahead I love you Beau.”
“I am dating Lucas.”
“Calm down TEEJ”
“CALM DOWN! HOW ARE YOU DATING MY BEST FRIEND AND I DON’T KNOW ABOUT IT?”
“It kind of just happened”
“Just happened? Like HELL it just happened. You both are straight.”
“You dated what’s her name… the girl with the big boobs and he had that one girl Julie.”
“You mean Grace. Yeah we dated but I realized sooner than later that I liked boys. They haven’t dated in a long time”
“I don’t believe you. When, how, why?”
“For over a year. We had to sneak around. Lucas and I were sure you wouldn’t be happy.”
“Well he was right about that.”
“How could you forgive him for that threesome with Sebastian?”
“Well unlike you, I had a civil conversation with him and eventually I forgave him.”
“You forgave him? No wonder Sebastian wanted me back. He assumed I would cave like you. You’re cheap and easy.”
“Cave like me? Cheap and easy? That’s not fair”
“I can’t even imagine what Lucas sees in a GEEK like you, He’s athletic and a jock and you well you aren’t”
“Hey that’s not nice you fucker”
At that moment I punched him in the nose and he ran out of the room crying.
Mom was at the door immediately with wet hair.
“Why are you two arguing and why does your brother have a bloody nose?” mom asked
“That fucker deserved it”
“Tristan James that is your brother.”
“He was until I found out he’s been dating Lucas.”
“Oh so he finally worked up the courage to tell you.”
“WHAT! You knew?”
“Of course I knew. You father and I caught them together.”
“CAUGHT THEM? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN”
“Lower your voice, you don’t yell at me like that.”
“Oh I will when people stop keeping secrets from me.”
“Beau knew you wouldn’t handle it well that’s why he didn’t tell you and it wasn’t my place to tell you.”
“What’s going on? What’s with the yelling” A sleepy Grayson said coming out of his room
“Beau was dating Lucas.””
“I think you mean is” Grayson replied
“Fuck you knew too? Am I the only one who didn’t know?”
“Calm down and get dressed and then apologize to your brother.”
“That’s not happening.”
I slammed the door in her face. Fuck all of this. I put some clothes and my boots on and grabbed my coat. I can’t believe my family hid this from me. I stormed out of my room and flew down the steps to find my Grandpa Tony helping Beau with his nose.
“You’re lucky it’s not broken” Grandpa Tony said
“Yeah well I can make that happen” I challenged.
“What has gotten into you?” Mom stated.
“Everyone here keeps secrets and fucks up my life. I’m done with you all.”
I ran out into the garage. I either could take Dad’s truck which I haven’t driven in a while or the SUV that I share with Beau. I jump in the SUV hit the button to open the door and backed out super-fast. I pull off without even closing the door. I sped down the street trying to decide where to go in this forsaken town with all this snow there is no-where to go and hide. I decide to head to the mall over the river in Kentucky.
The mall was packed and it was hard to find a parking space. I decided to forgo going into the stores and went into the Newport Aquarium. After paying admission I spent time just wandering around looking at all the animals. I was looking at my phone and felt a tap on my shoulder.
“TJ, honey” Mom said
“I don’t want to talk to you”
“Come and sit we need to talk.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Well you can’t leave as Grandpa Joe took the SUV and left. So you are stuck with me.”
She grabbed my arm and led me over to a bench. We sat in silence for a while.
“You know I always wanted to come check this place out. How did you find it?” Mom said breaking the silence.
“Heard kids at school talking about it”
“Ah… let’s walk then.”
We walked around the Aquarium for a while. Mom just kept looking at me like she was expecting me to say something. How could I when it was my family that deceived me. After a while Mom knew I wasn’t going to talk so she said we should leave. I followed her out and got into the car.
“How did you find me? Some tracker you installed?”
“Mother’s intuition, now we are not going home until we talk.”
She backed out and started heading towards home.
“I understand why you are upset but that was no reason to punch your brother. You are losing car privileges for two weeks.”
“That’s unfair. It’s his fault.”
“Care to explain how you punching him in the nose is his fault?”
“He’s dating my best friend and neither one of them told me.”
“After you ran off Beau called Lucas and explained how you went off. Apparently Lucas tried to tell you several times but he was so scared and same with Beau.”
“What? I am an approachable person.”
Mom laughed. “Says the boy who punched his brother”
I wasn’t going to admit anything. I am standing my ground.
“What did you mean that you caught them? Were they having sex?”
“No. One Friday night your brother left the house all dressed up saying he had a date. I of course thought it was with Grace. Your father wanted to go out somewhere special so he had me come over to the Pentagon to meet him. We went to this Italian restaurant called Sfoglina in Rosslyn. Imagine our surprise when we saw Beau and Lucas sitting in a booth holding hands. They didn’t see us at first. Your father just smiled. We asked not to be seated near them to give them privacy. After being seat they both noticed us and blushed and slid down in their seats. Your Father went over and talked with them. They were celebrating their one year anniversary. He asked them to join us when they were done. They paid their bill and sheepishly came over. We both assured them it was fine and we ordered some Champagne for all of us. We asked them to join us for a ride home. On the way home it was awkward to say the least. We kept telling Beau we loved him, like we did with you. We talked and Lucas said he kind of had a crush on Beau for a while. One night he came over and all of us except for Beau were out. He had come over looking for you but you were out with Sebastian. He joined your brother for a movie and it went on from there. They were both so scared to tell you and today you proved why.”
Wow… boy did I fuck things up. I guess I am not as observant as I thought.
“Mom, I am SUPER SORRY. I know I need to apologize to Beau but I need to think about how to do so.”
“I suggest you start with talking”
I sat in thought as to why if Grayson knew about Beau and Lucas, why did he say what he did with the package. SHIT… I threw that out. Maybe Lucas was telling me in a letter that was in the box. Well, I will never find out since I put it in the trash. Mom pulled into a church along the way home.
“Are you ready to go home and apologize?”
I exhaled loudly. “Not really but I don’t have a choice”
“TJ this attitude has to stop.”
“Then stop keeping secrets.” I retorted
If looks could kill I would be dead right now. The hurt I saw in her face said all I needed to know.
“Let’s get this over with.” I said.
“Please talk calmly with your brother and don’t punch him. If you don’t start having some common sense and work out this anger I am going to put you in therapy. Violence is never the answer.”
I could tell she means business. It is time like this that dad would have put me in the truck and talked some sense into me. I think I know what I need to do.
“Mom I think I need therapy.”
“Ok sweetheart. After the New Year I will seek someone out. I am glad you are realizing you need help.”
I closed my eyes “Good job mini… I am proud of you taking this small step and realizing you needed help.”
I always heard dad’s voice when I need him. We had such a bond that it feels like part of me is missing. As mom navigated the streets slowly since it was snowing lightly I looked at my email and saw a message that caught my eye but I couldn’t open it.
Julliard Admission Decision: Tristan J. Michaels Jr
As mom parked I didn’t mention the email. I had been the cause of so much trouble lately that I think my family would ship me off to college if they knew I got in. Well time to face the music.