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  • Renee Stevens

    Author Guess Who - #1

    By Renee Stevens

    I wanted to do something new for 2019, and what better than to start the new year off with a brand new feature. This one could be interesting as Authors were sent interview questions and had to answer them. The author's name has been omitted, and you'll have until the 26th to guess the author. The weekly wrap up on the 27th will reveal who our mystery author is. Each member gets three guesses, after that, guesses won't count. Happy guessing!         What is one thing that most GA members might not know about you?   I have never been hang gliding.   What prompted you to write your first story?   My grade 5 teacher. I’d always made up stories but she pushed me to write one.   What genre of books do you enjoy reading and have you written for that genre?   Many types are including comedy, drama, historical, horror, and science fiction. I’ve written a number of them.   Is there a genre that you haven’t written for that you would consider trying later on?   Perhaps one day historical or horror. Both would be a challenge.   What do like most about publishing on GA?   That would have to be the interaction with readers.   Do you have any unique writing habits or rituals to help you get into a writing mood?   No, nothing in particular. I do like to have a cup of coffee, however.   How has your writing style evolved over time?   Yes, it most definitely has evolved. Practice makes perfect as they say. Most people know I need a lot more practice.   Do you have a significant other?   Yes, I do.   Do you have any pets?   No, I do not have any pets. Do pet rocks count?   Do you post multi-chapter stories as you write? Do you wait until you’ve finished writing the entire story? Or is it something in between?   I prefer to write the entire story. Doing so ensures that you do not write yourself into a corner. So much less embarrassment that way.   What is your favorite television show?   Well, that’s a hard one. After much thought, I would have to say, Fortitude.   What is your favorite movie?   The Legend of Hell House   Do you write poetry? Prose? Or both?   I enjoy writing both. Each of them brings a different sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.   If you could meet one person, living or dead, who would it be?   I would enjoy meeting John Steinbeck. He is an author I much admire.   What would you say is your greatest accomplishment?   Beyond my writing, I would have to say my marriage. It means a great deal to me.  
    • 10 comments
    • 65 views
  • Renee Stevens

    Reviews Revisited (2014-2018)

    By Renee Stevens

    Reviews Revisited   To start the new year off, the review team thought that we'd take a look at all the reviews posted since 2014. There were a lot of wonderful reviews submitted by readers and by the review team. Reviews for stories that were part of the CSR or are no longer found on site have been omitted.  If you're curious about the review and would like to read it, simply click on the date and the link will take you to the review. Don't see your favorite story on the list? Consider writing your own review and submitting it. If you are interested in doing a review for the blog, contact @Timothy M..   A huge thank you to Timothy for taking the time to compile the list. 2018 January 8th: Classic Author Special Review - The Review Team January 22nd: Confide/ant by Sasha Distan - Lisa February 12th: Shifter by Skinnydragon - Puppilull March 12th: Predator/Prey by Parker Owens - Spikey582  April 9th: Travelling Home by podga - Timothy M. April 23rd: Boy story: The road taken by Rip Skor - Puppilull May 14th: Button by Cole Matthews - BlindAmbition June 11th: The Lilydale Leopards by Graeme - Timothy M. July 9th: How the Light Gets In by Duncan Ryder - Parker Owens July 23rd: Blood of the Neko by Craftingmom - LitLover August 13th: Losing Kevin by Ronyx - BlindAmbition September 10th: Pour Me Another by K.C. - Spikey582  October 8th: The Web by MrM - Puppilull October 22nd: Never Too Late by northie - Timothy M. November 12th: Twelve Gays of Christmas by Iomax61 - Puppilull December 10th: The Hollow Hills by Valkyrie - Cole Matthews December 24th: Favorite Christmas Story Special Review - The Review Team   2017 January 9th: Circle of Hell Stories by Sasha Distan - Puppilull January 23rd: Joined by Blood by Renee Stevens - Aditus February 13th: Secret Admirer Special Review - The Review Team April 10th: Hypnotic by Cia - Litlover May 8th: The Navigator by Cynus - Timothy M. May 22nd: Unforgivable by LitLover - Spikey582 June 12th: A Healing Heart by Lilansui - Puppillul July 10th: Rule #3 by CassieQ - William King July 24th: Premium Stories Special Review - The Review Team August 14th: Alex and Zach by Greg_A - Aditus September 11th: 9/11 by Mark Arbour - Timothy M. October 9th:  Morningstar : The Malaise by Headstall - Wicked Witch October 23rd: Miss Silver Pretty-Pink Toes by mikiesboy - AC Benus November 13th: Personal Banking by Refugium - Puppilull December 11th: Famous Barr series by AC Benus - Timothy M.   2016 January 18th: Toy Soldiers by Dabeagle - Valkyrie February 15th: Trouble Plus Trouble by Palantir - Timothy M. April 18th: MetaBattles by JohnAR - Defiance19 May 9th: Red Running Shoes by Aditus - Timothy M.  May 23rd: Song and Dance by Headstall - Litlover June 20th: Thaw by Puppilull - Timothy M. July 11th: A to Z by Parker Owens - Aditus August 8th: The Alliance by VVesley - Puppilull August 22nd: About Carl by Diogenes - Timothy M. September 12th: NaPoWriMo by Mikiesboy - Aditus October 10th: Shapeshifter by metajinx - Puppilull October 24th: MetaDeaths by JohnAR - PKCrichton November 14th: Nature Wrath Anthology Special Review - The Review Team   2015 January 19th: The English Year by Jwolf - Timothy M. February 16th: Dangerous Impulses by Greg_A - Cia March 16th: Leaving Club Leo by C James - Renee Stevens March 23rd: Meta by JohnAR - Timothy M. April 20th: Savory, Bitter and Sweet by Percy - Timothy M. May 18th: Gaymer by Dabeagle - Renee Stevens June 20th: Denn's Mobile Circus by Twisted_Dreemz - AC Benus July 20th: Bound and Bound: The Curse and the Captives by AC Benus - Valkyrie August 17th: MetaOrigins by JohnAR - Puppilull August 24th: Future Imperfect by Bill W - Atruefan September 21st: Prophylaxis by Rambling Robin - Timothy M. November 16th: Confounded by Andr0gene - Timothy M. November 23rd: MetaShadowlands by JohnAR - Litlover December 21st: Kissing the Dragon by lomax - Timothy M.   2014 January 20th: No Room In The Lodge by Joann414 - LJH (Louis Harris) February 17th: Burden of Secrets by Cia - Comicfan March 17th: Roommates by Krista - LJH (Louis Harris) March 24th: The Lake by Dolores Esteban - Joann414 May 19th: Geeks by CassieQ - Cole Matthews June 16th: Memoirs Of A Child Of The Past Century by Old Bob - Percy June 23rd: The Matchmaker is Grounded by Dark - Renee Stevens August 18th: The Game by Nephylim - Joann414 September 15th: Empath's Kiss by Andrew Todd - Renee Stevens September 22nd: Judas Tree by AC Benus - Timothy M. October 13th: Joined by Blood by Renee Stevens - Cia November 17th: Imprint by Hermit in the Cave - faxity December 8th: Misunderstandings by BigAKHorton - Timothy M. December 22nd: Gay Whales by Graeme - Renee Stevens
    • 1 comment
    • 134 views

Our community blogs

  1. Myr
    Latest Entry

    By Myr,

    As mentioned in previous announcements, we are undergoing clean up and consolidation. 

    As part of this, some of the temporary links that were on the forums have been removed and placed in the newly streamlined "Help" menu.

    image.png

     

    • Help -FAQ = a list of common questions with links to the answers.
    • Help Topics = a database of common questions and answers
    • Step-by-Step Guide to Authors = How to become an Author on the site.
    • Support = Open a support ticket if you need help related to your account or other private site related issue
    • Staff = list of staff on the site with contact information
    • Guidelines = site rules
    • Writing Resources = a page full of links to handy writing tools, guides, and articles
    • About Gay Authors = a bit of history of the site.

     

    A reminder that we encourage you to have your account set to receive news email from the site:

    https://gayauthors.org/notifications/options/

    image.png

  2. Renee Stevens
    Latest Entry

    By Renee Stevens,

    I wanted to do something new for 2019, and what better than to start the new year off with a brand new feature. This one could be interesting as Authors were sent interview questions and had to answer them. The author's name has been omitted, and you'll have until the 26th to guess the author. The weekly wrap up on the 27th will reveal who our mystery author is. Each member gets three guesses, after that, guesses won't count. Happy guessing!

     

     


     

     

    What is one thing that most GA members might not know about you?

     

    I have never been hang gliding.

     

    What prompted you to write your first story?

     

    My grade 5 teacher. I’d always made up stories but she pushed me to write one.

     

    What genre of books do you enjoy reading and have you written for that genre?

     

    Many types are including comedy, drama, historical, horror, and science fiction. I’ve written a number of them.

     

    Is there a genre that you haven’t written for that you would consider trying later on?

     

    Perhaps one day historical or horror. Both would be a challenge.

     

    What do like most about publishing on GA?

     

    That would have to be the interaction with readers.

     

    Do you have any unique writing habits or rituals to help you get into a writing mood?

     

    No, nothing in particular. I do like to have a cup of coffee, however.

     

    How has your writing style evolved over time?

     

    Yes, it most definitely has evolved. Practice makes perfect as they say. Most people know I need a lot more practice.

     

    Do you have a significant other?

     

    Yes, I do.

     

    Do you have any pets?

     

    No, I do not have any pets. Do pet rocks count?

     

    Do you post multi-chapter stories as you write? Do you wait until you’ve finished writing the entire story? Or is it something in between?

     

    I prefer to write the entire story. Doing so ensures that you do not write yourself into a corner. So much less embarrassment that way.

     

    What is your favorite television show?

     

    Well, that’s a hard one. After much thought, I would have to say, Fortitude.

     

    What is your favorite movie?

     

    The Legend of Hell House

     

    Do you write poetry? Prose? Or both?

     

    I enjoy writing both. Each of them brings a different sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.

     

    If you could meet one person, living or dead, who would it be?

     

    I would enjoy meeting John Steinbeck. He is an author I much admire.

     

    What would you say is your greatest accomplishment?

     

    Beyond my writing, I would have to say my marriage. It means a great deal to me.

     

    large.990126429_WhoAmI.jpg

  3. comicfan
    Latest Entry

    New year - same me but trying new ways.

     

    After a horrendous year last year I needed help and have been talking. Hard admitting one is only human. It also helps to hear or be reminded that there are two or more sides to any story, and while your choices are your own, sometimes the things leading up to it,and the choices others make after it you aren't responsible for.

     

    In other news I'm working on three projects. A story for the anthology using Seeon and the Waza family. A new chapter in my seer story. (I know I said it was done but sometimes your characters just don't want to be forgotten.) Finally I'm hoping to complete a 5 or 6 chapter story I'm calling Next Chapter. It is about a man forced to start over after being kept on the edges of everything.

     

    That's all for now.

  4. Hi all

    I have been full of work, so of course to escape that i decided to make a new suggestion. I will finally suggest a single book, and although to be honest the author did wrote a "kind of a series" around the same subject, Alexander The Great rise and rule, it can be a stand alone read. The Persian Boy by Mary Renault, tell as the story of a young boy that captured, made an eunuch and sold as a slave to the King of Persia. After Alexander conquering of the Persian Empire, he becomes Alexander servant and lover. I know many in the gay community might already know this book, but I decided to make it my suggestion because this was a book that always stayed in my mind. My parents have a considerable book selection and I read this book when I was a teenager in high school. I am not sure of the details anymore, I think at that time I already new I was gay, but before I found online fiction or GA, it was actually the first book I read that can be considered a gay story, and it was important for me at the time.

    Hope you guys enjoy it.

     

    image.png.05100dcfd446a6c1445927380aac3d4f.png

     

    PS: these entries don't have to be my suggestions only, you can leave another book suggestion of the featured category in the comments. :*)

     

  5. Renee Stevens
    Latest Entry

    By Renee Stevens,

    Reviews Revisited

     

    To start the new year off, the review team thought that we'd take a look at all the reviews posted since 2014. There were a lot of wonderful reviews submitted by readers and by the review team. Reviews for stories that were part of the CSR or are no longer found on site have been omitted.  If you're curious about the review and would like to read it, simply click on the date and the link will take you to the review. Don't see your favorite story on the list? Consider writing your own review and submitting it. If you are interested in doing a review for the blog, contact @Timothy M..   A huge thank you to Timothy for taking the time to compile the list.

    2018

    January 8th: Classic Author Special Review - The Review Team

    January 22nd: Confide/ant by Sasha Distan - Lisa

    February 12th: Shifter by Skinnydragon - Puppilull

    March 12th: Predator/Prey by Parker Owens - Spikey582 

    April 9th: Travelling Home by podga - Timothy M.

    April 23rd: Boy story: The road taken by Rip Skor - Puppilull

    May 14th: Button by Cole Matthews - BlindAmbition

    June 11th: The Lilydale Leopards by Graeme - Timothy M.

    July 9th: How the Light Gets In by Duncan Ryder - Parker Owens

    July 23rd: Blood of the Neko by Craftingmom - LitLover

    August 13th: Losing Kevin by Ronyx - BlindAmbition

    September 10th: Pour Me Another by K.C. - Spikey582 

    October 8th: The Web by MrM - Puppilull

    October 22nd: Never Too Late by northie - Timothy M.

    November 12th: Twelve Gays of Christmas by Iomax61 - Puppilull

    December 10th: The Hollow Hills by Valkyrie - Cole Matthews

    December 24th: Favorite Christmas Story Special Review - The Review Team

     

    2017

    January 9th: Circle of Hell Stories by Sasha Distan - Puppilull

    January 23rd: Joined by Blood by Renee Stevens - Aditus

    February 13th: Secret Admirer Special Review - The Review Team

    April 10th: Hypnotic by Cia - Litlover

    May 8th: The Navigator by Cynus - Timothy M.

    May 22nd: Unforgivable by LitLover - Spikey582

    June 12th: A Healing Heart by LilansuiPuppillul

    July 10th: Rule #3 by CassieQ - William King

    July 24th: Premium Stories Special Review - The Review Team

    August 14th: Alex and Zach by Greg_A - Aditus

    September 11th: 9/11 by Mark Arbour - Timothy M.

    October 9th:  Morningstar : The Malaise by Headstall - Wicked Witch

    October 23rd: Miss Silver Pretty-Pink Toes by mikiesboy - AC Benus

    November 13th: Personal Banking by Refugium - Puppilull

    December 11th: Famous Barr series by AC Benus - Timothy M.

     

    2016

    January 18th: Toy Soldiers by Dabeagle - Valkyrie

    February 15th: Trouble Plus Trouble by Palantir - Timothy M.

    April 18th: MetaBattles by JohnAR - Defiance19

    May 9th: Red Running Shoes by Aditus - Timothy M. 

    May 23rd: Song and Dance by Headstall - Litlover

    June 20th: Thaw by Puppilull - Timothy M.

    July 11th: A to Z by Parker Owens - Aditus

    August 8th: The Alliance by VVesley - Puppilull

    August 22nd: About Carl by Diogenes - Timothy M.

    September 12th: NaPoWriMo by Mikiesboy - Aditus

    October 10th: Shapeshifter by metajinx - Puppilull

    October 24th: MetaDeaths by JohnAR - PKCrichton

    November 14th: Nature Wrath Anthology Special Review - The Review Team

     

    2015

    January 19th: The English Year by Jwolf - Timothy M.

    February 16th: Dangerous Impulses by Greg_A - Cia

    March 16th: Leaving Club Leo by C James - Renee Stevens

    March 23rd: Meta by JohnAR - Timothy M.

    April 20th: Savory, Bitter and Sweet by Percy - Timothy M.

    May 18th: Gaymer by Dabeagle - Renee Stevens

    June 20th: Denn's Mobile Circus by Twisted_Dreemz - AC Benus

    July 20th: Bound and Bound: The Curse and the Captives by AC Benus - Valkyrie

    August 17th: MetaOrigins by JohnAR - Puppilull

    August 24th: Future Imperfect by Bill W - Atruefan

    September 21st: Prophylaxis by Rambling Robin - Timothy M.

    November 16th: Confounded by Andr0gene - Timothy M.

    November 23rd: MetaShadowlands by JohnAR - Litlover

    December 21st: Kissing the Dragon by lomax - Timothy M.

     

    2014

    January 20th: No Room In The Lodge by Joann414 - LJH (Louis Harris)

    February 17th: Burden of Secrets by Cia - Comicfan

    March 17th: Roommates by Krista - LJH (Louis Harris)

    March 24th: The Lake by Dolores Esteban - Joann414

    May 19th: Geeks by CassieQ - Cole Matthews

    June 16th: Memoirs Of A Child Of The Past Century by Old Bob - Percy

    June 23rd: The Matchmaker is Grounded by Dark - Renee Stevens

    August 18th: The Game by Nephylim - Joann414

    September 15th: Empath's Kiss by Andrew Todd - Renee Stevens

    September 22nd: Judas Tree by AC Benus - Timothy M.

    October 13th: Joined by Blood by Renee Stevens - Cia

    November 17th: Imprint by Hermit in the Cave - faxity

    December 8th: Misunderstandings by BigAKHorton - Timothy M.

    December 22nd: Gay Whales by Graeme - Renee Stevens

  6. wildone
    Latest Entry

    By wildone,

    Oops, sorry for the lateness, I totally forgot what day it was yesterday 0:) I think it is time to take me out to the back 40 :unsure:

     

    Monday, Cia brought us the January CSR feature. Did you go :o when you read the title too? :gikkle:

     

    Wednesday, Renee shared the third installment of the new blog feature, Q&A Session. 10 different contributors!!

     

    Thursday, Renee brought us some timely information on the Spring Anthology,

     

    Friday was back to our normal broadcasting schedule with a new set of prompts from comicfan:

     

    Comsie joined us in the weekly blog with another edition of GA Articles on Saturday:

     

    Anthologies

    • 2019 Spring Anthology: In the Stars - Due May 15th
    • 2019 Spring Anthology: Snapped  - Due May 15th

     

    Blog Opportunities

     

    • Ask An Author: Send your questions for your favorite authors to @Carlos Hazday (no questions = no Ask An Author)

    • Story Recommendations:  Open to all GA authors & readers. PM your recommendation and why you recommend it to a Site Admin.

    • Guess the Author: Open to all GA authors. PM @Renee Stevens to participate.

    • 3 Story Promo: Open to all GA Authors. PM @Renee Stevens to participate.

    • Author Interview: Open to all GA Authors. PM @Renee Stevens to participate.

    • Favorite Self-Written Story: Open to all GA authors. PM @Renee Stevens to participate.

    • Story Recommendations:  Open to all GA authors & readers. PM @Renee Stevens to participate.

    • Questions & Answers: Open to all GA authors, readers, and editors. Visit the thread and PM @Renee Stevens to participate.

     

    Premium Updates:

     

    Harbinger by Cia *Premium*

     

    Classic Updates:

     

    Afterglow by Dabeagle

     

    It's Not Easy Being a Tree by Ronyx

     

    Signature Updates:

     

    Adrift by Mann Ramblings

     

    Aria Graice by Nephylim

     

    Denied by Cia

     

    So Weeps the Willow by Cole Matthews

     

    Translation Trashbin by AC Benus; Book 7 of Verse

     

    Promising Updates:

     

    Changes, Again by Mikiesboy

     

    Georgetown: Goodnight, My Angel by Carlos Hazday

     

    My journey through pain by albertnothlit

     

    The Cockney Canuck by Dodger

     

    The Golden City by Aceinthehole

     

    tim's Bits and Pieces by Mikiesboy

     

    ***Check out this GA Classic***

    In Due Time

    by J_Ross

     

    Jake Taylor is definitely not gay...

    ...Except, he might be.

     

    Don't forget.... Read, Write, and REVIEW!!!

     

  7. Razor
    Latest Entry

    I went to the gas station and like an idiot left my wallet, I just wanted to buy cigarettes (before you say it, yes, I know I'll get the cancer, I'm fully realizing that, I'm okay with it, I'm just gonna jump off a building when it happens, but for right now it keeps me sane, I like to borrow against my future, probably not healthy but we cope in our own ways).  I went to the counter and he said "6.67".  I reached for my wallet and SURPRISE, that shit is not there, because I've been so distracted today I forgot my whole life at home.  I ran to my car and came up with 6.62.  He just said "I have some pennies, it's cool" and reached for his own pocket.

     

    So I went to my house and got a five dollar bill and brought it to him because today I had a compliment call from work, which means a $10 gift card or so, and I figured I should pay that forward for him being so nice to me (it was an army vet, he was so kind, so nice... I mean I kinda wanted to put his gun in my mouth, if ya know what i mean, but hey man, he does him and I do me, and I feel like he's not all about teh gey, so I was just like man, you are an awesome person).  Just waltzed in and said "Thanks for not being a dick, my man."  He said "No problem, thanks!" and we moved on from that moment, both smiling, because at that moment in time, we were both struggling, my limping ass going in there, him standing there probably considering how he's gonna burn that place to the ground, but we got to a point where we could both be happy.  

     

    Moral of the story: Don't be a cunt.  You never know when someone will give you a %5000 return on your investment.  I'm bad at percentages, though, so check my math there.  It's either 500 or 5000 percent, fuck me, I'm not good with numbers, %500 percent, right?  I mean you just move the decimals... goddamnit, math.  I'm more a language guy.  And I'm literally too lazy to google.  POINT IS HE PAID A NICKEL AND NOW HE MIGHT SMILE FOR A FEW MINUTES.

     

    Another side note, all of you here have been so... damnably nice.  Jesus.  Like for real, it makes me wanna cry, because I cannot believe that even a few people have said something kind.  Keep on doing you, you guys.  I wish you all the best. I've learned lately that:

     

    If you never say anything, nobody can help.  You might feel like you're causing drama, or anxiety, but unless you yell as loud as you can no one will pay attention.  

  8. Fae Briona
    Latest Entry

    Had my second counseling session yesterday. Honestly not sure how effective they are. Things are, ever so very slowly, getting better. Getting easier to think of the good times and the memories without hyperventilating or collapsing into a pile of tears. Doesn't look that professional when it happens at work.  :(

     

    Biggest hurdles for me are still the guilt of not having told him that I loved him -- even though I know he knew I did, and I know he felt the same way about me; and letting go of the idealized version of our next date, which would have been so very soon, when we had so many firsts planned.  The feeling of having waited too long for those things -- even though I know that if I had pushed him too fast he would have bolted and ran. He was so afraid of being hurt again. A special place in hells for someone who hurts someone else that badly.

     

    Still odd random things that will trigger a wave of pain and grief.

     

    I love you my baby - you will always be your daddy's boy. 💗

  9. Gay Authors Articles

    Comicality
    Latest Entry

    By Comicality,

    This week, I'd like to talk about something that I face from time to time, and it often takes a few days for me to power through it, but it can be done with a little bit of patience to balance out the frustration of not being able to sit down and write when you really want to.

     

    I'm talking about writer burn out.

     

    Don't panic, hehehe! It's not a permanent condition. But it does happen from time to time, and it's never a good feeling. But there are ways to get those rusty wheels turning again, fire up the engines, and get your muse back in working order. You just have to ride it out every now and then.

     

    Now, when I talk about writer burn out...I'm not talking about 'writer's block'. That's an entirely different animal altogether. With a block, there are no ideas coming to you, no direction, no real inspiration to get you motivated to keep writing. That happens from time to time as well. But burn out is when you already have your thoughts together, you know where the story is going, you know exactly what you want to say...but there's this strange 'fatigue' that settles into your very bones, and you suddenly don't know whether or not you really feel like typing it out. It's like you just feel worn out and you're almost intimidated to write in your current mood, because you won't 'feel' it the same way that you would when you're all hyped up and ready to cover your screen with a 1500 word outburst in one sitting before even taking a break. Have you guys ever experienced that? Or is it just me?

     

    There are times when my brain is racing and I have all of my notes sitting right here beside me, and I feel like I should be ready to go...but my emotional gas tank is empty. It's hard to explain, but I just don't have that magic spark that I need to write anything good at that particular moment. I don't know where it goes. I don't know where it hides. I only know that it's missing when I need the added juice to get started, and I hate having to feel like a slacker until it shows back up again. But what else can I do?

     

    It happens. Sometimes you've been sitting at a keyboard, and your fingers are sore, and your wrists hurt, and your butt is getting flat, and your shoulders are slumped over, and your eyes are red and worn out from strain, and...you just don't feel like writing anything at all. You WANT to write, but you don't feel like writing. Weird. Sometimes writing can be a physically taxing as well as emotionally draining experience. But, if (or more like when) this happens...don't stress yourself out about it. It'll come back to you. And often, the result will be better than ever before.

     

    My first piece of advice to you guys is to simply let it happen. Don't push yourself or force the words to leap out on the screen if you're not feeling it at that moment. Writing should always be a passion, not a chore. If you don't feel like your mojo is working...take a break. It's as simple as that. Sit back for a moment, catch your breath, get some sleep...pour a glass of something 'wicked' to drink. Hehehe! Give your creativity a breather every now and then. I treat my brain and my emotions the same way that I would treat any other muscle in my body. This blank screen that I sit in front of is my intangible version of going to the gym for a healthy workout. Don't make yourself sore and miserable by pushing yourself too hard. Give your 'dream factory' time to gather new material for you to write about. Give your battery some time to recharge. You'd be surprised how often it helps more than it hurts. And I know that it's sometimes difficult to stand back and break whatever writer 'momentum' you had going initially, but I've found that when I push myself to the brink of exhaustion on any one project, I end up finishing it and not wanting to write much of anything for weeks afterward. I'd rather give myself a 48 hour break and get right back to work than frustrate myself into burning out for weeks at a time.

     

    It sounds weird, but I start to resent a story that keeps nagging me to write it. Hehehe! Sad, but true. Sometimes, I'll just be mentally fatigued and I want to come back a bit later when I can give my writing all of the heart and energy it deserves. I've learned that I have to listen to my muse 90% of the time so I can get these stories to look and feel the way that I want them to. But that other 10% of the time? My muse needs to listen to me for a change. Slow down. I've done all I can do. Back off for a little while so we can get back in sync again. Hehehe!

     

    My personal muse is a huge brat, and hates to hear the word no...but he'll get over it. :P

     

    Allow yourself some time to breathe. I can't tell you how many times I just figured, "I'll sit down at that keyboard on my day off, and just handcuff myself to this machine for 12 hours straight and get it all done in a day!" Hehehe, yeah...life almost never works like that. Anything can tip my current mood in a counterproductive way. I could get a nasty email, I could wake up with a sore throat and a cough, it could be a rainy and gloomy day outside, I could get a rather hefty bill in the mail, I could have slept wrong and have a sore shoulder...hehehe, it could be anything. And, suddenly, I can't generate the right amount of sparkles that I need to do what I do online. But getting angry about it only makes things worse. Frustration is the undertow that's certain to pull me further and further away from the shore. In order to beat it, I need to relax.

     

    And sometimes, I need to unplug completely.

     

    There are certain activities that I can jump into in order to deal with writer burnout when it happens. It often helps me get my thoughts together, and I can get back on track rather quickly. My top three are as follows...

     

    1. Youtube! Hehehe, yes...I believe that Youtube is probably one of the greatest distractions, and yet greatest stress relievers, in human history. Sometimes, when I need to step away from my 'Comsie work' and give my brain a chance to cool down...I head over to Youtube with the click of a button and I get a chance to zone out for a bit and SMILE for a little bit. I want to laugh a little bit. Maybe check out something creepy, or watch a few movie trailers, whatever. Sometimes I get into a 'Youtube Loop' where clicking on one video causes the system to suggest something else. Then I click on that, and it suggests something ELSE. It can be endless. But it gives me something to concentrate on other than the aggravation of not being able to write. Who knows? You might even find yourself getting the inspiration you need to get back in the mood you were looking for. You never know. Either way, if that gets my brain to release a little dose of Dopamine into my system from the entertainment, I'll be that much closer to slaving away on the next story or chapter. The sooner, the better.
    2. Chats and email! Despite my need for a touch of isolation for a few hours a day, I really do pride myself on being a rather social person. I really do enjoy talking to people when I get the chance, and I don't get to do it as often as I used to. So there are times when I break away from the intense focus of writing to just...say hello to people on the Shack and engage in some casual chit chat from time to time. I might start answering emails from people who wrote to me, or I make a surprise visit to the chatroom on my site to share a few giggles with my online friends. This always puts me in a good mood, and it re-energizes me to be in touch with the people who have given the site so much support so I can see what's going on in their lives and how they're doing. Again, having a spontaneous interaction with other people will keep you from pulling your hair out over something that you really can't control. Let the writing obligation go for a few hours and just unwind for a bit. It's fun. I promise. :)
    3. Reading! I've said it a bunch of times before, but I can't say it enough. Even though I LOVE to write stories and entertain others...sometimes I like to be entertained too! There is sooooo much talent out there. So many writers with unique perspectives and a variety of writing styles that I love getting into when I need to break away from the grind of it all. Get on GayAuthors, get on Nifty, get on The Shack Library...find stories and give some other authors a try. See what they're doing with their characters, what techniques they're using, how they make you feel. Not only do you get a chance to lay back and enjoy someone else's hard work for a change, but you could almost think of it as doing your homework as an author. Reading always makes for better writing. Always. So see what's out there. And if you like what you read, send the author a quick note to tell them so. Who knows? You might get a colleague and a new friend out of it all.

     

    All in all...the key is to detach yourself from the desperation that you may be feeling to create some sort of masterpiece against your will. Break away from it. Take a day for yourself, and come back when you truly feel inspired to move forward with the story that you wanted to write. Maybe it'll be today, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week...who knows? But I can honestly tell you guys that I have been deeply dissatisfied with every chapter or story that I felt 'forced' to write by a deadline. And these days...I won't even release something unless I know, for certain, that it represents my very best effort. I can tell when I was pushing myself too hard. I worry that my readers can too. I didn't come this far to screw it all up now. Hehehe! I want my beginner's luck to keep carrying me for as long as humanly possible before it gives out on me. :P

     

    Anyway, I hope this helps! Writer burnout...have you guys ever been trapped in that frame of mind? Let us know!

    Seezya soon!

     

  10. Renee Stevens
    Latest Entry

    By Renee Stevens,

    Happy Friday, y'all!  Sorry for the delayed prompts today, but here you go!  Hopefully these inspire you to write something, whether you're a seasoned author or someone writing for the first time. Enjoy!

     


     

    Prompt 724 – Creative

    Tag – New Year, New You

    On New Year’s Eve like so many others you made a promise that in the new year you would change and do much better. Having had a bit too much to drink and no one special to share the night with you went home and collapsed into bed just before midnight. When you wake, you have a hell of a hangover and stumble to the bathroom to take care of business. As you catch sight of yourself in the mirror you scream. You aren’t you anymore, but that’s just the start of a new year and new you. What do you do?

     

    Prompt 725 – Creative

    Tag – Midnight Kiss

    Your grandmother has always told the story of everyone in the family finding their true love by being kissed by their soulmate at midnight on their eighteenth new year. You were alone and didn’t get kissed. She begged you to out and celebrate on your twenty-first, saying it was the last chance. You finally do, only to be grabbed by a stranger seconds before midnight and given a soul searing kiss. What happens?

     


     

    Did you write a prompt response last week? Share a link in the comments!

  11. Warning: Just in case you haven't read my blog before, I swear. Deal with it. Also, this rant is a mess. Deal with that, too. :P 

     

    A little while ago I came across a post on Facebook in which some Gen Y kid or another was saying how great it was to be under 21, because people older than that don't understand memes. (There was other stuff, too, but that was my takeaway.) And, I just, what? Who do these kids think they are?

     

    First of all, the word meme was coined by Richard Dawkins in the fucking 70s, so don't come here and say that older people don't know what memes are. Secondly, my generation invented that white text over a picture meme format that you are all using. Dude, I was making memes before you knew how to use a computer. Ceiling Cat was watching me masturbate while some of you were still in nappies.

     

    Ceiling_Cat_by_SleepySnitter.jpg?1318992

     

    You think you know memes? You weren't there when the Internet invented lolcats. You think you're an Internet aficionado? b37 y00 c4n'7 r34d 1337 5p34k. We had shit that went viral before social media even existed. We didn't have Facebook. We lived on forums, in irc chatrooms, livejournal. Man, livejournal... We didn't even call them blogs yet. We had podcasts before they were called podcasts. We had crappy flash animated web series, like Neurotically Yours (I think they still make it, but I remember it when it was truly shit and oh so wonderful). We didn't even have YouTube, all we had was flash player. You want viral video? I'll give you viral video:

     

     

    Bet you've never even heard of Albino Black Sheep, have you? 2003 that video was made. Don't know if it was the first video to go viral, but it must have been damn close. Go back further to Homestar Runner, Strong Bad e-mails, and Trogdor the Burninator.

     

     

    And I'm sure there's a fucktonne of stuff that I'm too young to remember, but I remember 4chan when it was just a bunch of 13-year-olds with a bad sense of humour telling rape jokes, instead of the toxic cesspool of web-terrorists it's become. And you're gonna come here and tell me that folks of my generation don't understand the Internet? That we don't understand memes? You don't know Jack Schitt. Piss off! Go home to your mum! You've never played a point and click flash game where you beat the shit out of the Teletubbies.

     

    TL;DR: Get off my fucking lawn!

     

     

  12. The themes of the 2019 Spring Anthology are: In the Stars and/or Snapped

     

    Feel free to interpret these themes in any way you want. The anthologies are not exclusive, but inclusive, so don't worry if you think your entry has only a tangential link to the theme. If you are inspired, then write a short story, poem or play, and submit it.

     

    Please read these submission guidelines carefully.

     

    You may address these themes in any style or genre you choose. Be as creative as you want to be with the themes. However, please note that this anthology is an anthology of short stories. By definition, a short story must stand alone and not require reading a prior story. It therefore cannot be a chapter in a serial.

     

    Who may participate

     

    Everyone is welcome and encouraged to participate. However, submission to GA Stories requires that you be a member here at GA so you can be assigned as the author. If you have author status (which is free and you can get after five posts in the GA forums), you can submit stories.


    Submission Guidelines

     

    Submission Date: May 15th, 2019

     

    Please Note: Submission date is for submission to the Anthology Proof Team. Proofreads should take no more than 72 hours once you have been paired with a proofreader, if you have not received your story back within 72 hours, please contact Renee Stevens via PM. If you send your stories in within the last 48 hours of the deadline, you have 48 hours after receiving it back to upload it in order for it to be included in the Anthology.

     

    Non-Poetry

    • No Story Limit: Each story submitted must meet quality and editing guidelines and only one story can be under 1,000 words.
    • Each story posted as its own submission
    • Minimum Word Count Per Story: 1,000
    • Maximum Word Count Per Story: 25,000


    Poetry

    • Up to five poems
    • Posted as a single submission (a collection)
    • Each poem posted as its own chapter


    Submission Procedure *Please read carefully*

     

    Once your story is complete and has gone through your beta and editing team, please complete the following steps:

    • Contact @Valkyrie via PM. Include in the PM the following information: Title, original editor, genre, synopsis, word count, and excerpt in the body of the PM. Attach your story file. You will be paired with an editor from the Anthology Proof Team who will perform a final proof for the anthology and return the file to you. *Please Note: The Anthology Proof Team is not meant to take the place of an author’s normal editing team so all entries MUST be edited prior to contacting  Valkyrie*
    • Once you receive your proofed file, complete your edits and submit your story into GA Stories, for help, please read How do I upload my anthology entry into GA Stories?
      • Make sure the story is unpublished by clicking BOTH the publish sliders, one for the chapter and one for the story itself
      • Select “Fiction” as the category. It will be moved to the correct category by the anthology team.
      • Mark your story as COMPLETE. Only completed stories are allowed in the anthologies
      • Please note that once you submit a story it will NOT show up in your list of stories until the anthology has gone live.
      • Copy the URL for your story and provide Renee Stevens with the URL via the announcement thread so that your submission may be checked to ensure it has been submitted correctly and meets submission guidelines. This also ensures that it will get moved to the anthology category. Please give the URL to the STORY page, not the chapter page.
      • *NEW* Each theme will have it's own category. When providing the URL for your story in the announcement thread, please state which theme your story best represents.

      [*]Please do a visual check of your story once it has been uploaded to ensure that it uploaded correctly


    Extensions

     

    Occasionally things happen that prevent an author from meeting the deadline. If you should find yourself in such a predicament, PM Renee Stevens, before the deadline (not the day of or after), and something may be able to be worked out. Please contact Renee only if you need an extension; requests will only be considered when requested by the author personally. However, if the same author is consistently asking for extra time, extensions may no longer be granted for that particular author. Deadlines exist for a reason. The Anthology Team needs time to prep the anthology to go live and extensions, while occasionally warranted due to unforeseeable circumstances, add to the already hectic workload. If you have NOT made arrangements with Renee prior to the deadline, your Anthology will not be included. Please do not send a message the day an anthology is due requesting an extension, these will not be granted. You are welcome to post your story on your own and include a story note stating that it was originally meant to be part of the anthology.

     

    Story Titles

     

    Please do not use the anthology themes or your GA Username as a title. Be as original as you can. In case of duplicate titles within the anthology, we will request that titles be changed.

     

    Unacceptable entries & Content Warnings

     

    Entries that are obviously unedited (containing many errors), are overly graphic, or which are deemed to have unacceptable content will be either declined outright, or changes may be requested as a condition of entry. For information on what is considered to be unacceptable, please see the Story Content Rules FAQ. If you still have questions, ask.

     

    Please include a Content Warning in the story notes if your story contains sensitive content. Examples of sensitive content: abuse, especially graphic/extreme abuse or child abuse, in-scene graphic violence, suicide attempts/themes, allowable incest, etc... if you're unsure that your story falls within this type of content please alert Valkyrie when you send the PM requesting the final proof.

     

    Previously posted stories (whether at GA or elsewhere) are not eligible for inclusion into the GA anthologies.

     

    Editing

     

    All entries MUST be edited prior to being sent to the Anthology Proof Team. If you need an editor, please visit the Writing Support Requests forum to request one. There are editors who prefer to edit only one shots, such as anthologies. Please make sure to state that your story is for the upcoming anthology. Also, please make sure to follow the guidelines when requesting an editor.

     

    Copyright

     

    As with all content in GA Stories, the rights remain with the individual authors. Your story will post with a simple 2019 copyright notice, using your GA user display name. If you have another preference (for example, a different name, or a Creative Commons license, or specific copyright wording you'd like to use), please include that with your submission.

     

    However, with this anthology, by submitting your story, you are giving GayAuthors.org first worldwide rights with 14 days exclusivity. What that means is you are giving GayAuthors.org permission to archive your story on its website, distribute it via RSS, kindle, iphone, ipad, eyeball…. And you agree not to publish it anywhere else for 2 weeks.

     

    If you later decide to post your story at another site, please mention at the beginning or end of the story that it was first published as part of the 2019 Gay Authors Spring Anthology: In the Stars and/or Snapped, and include a link back to GA if possible.

     

    If you have any questions, please contact Renee Stevens via PM or via the Anthology Blog or Forum.

  13. I got that call that you don't want today.

     

    I've been dreading it. I hoped it would take longer.

     

    My brothers battle with cancer is over. He's going home for hospice care. 

     

    We don't know how long he'll last but it's not expected to be long. 

     

    This is why I've been away a lot. Silly cat pictures is about all I can manage at the moment. 

     

    I'll be back. 

     

     

  14. I am pleased to announce that I have began writing a new story, with the continuing adventures of Sebastian, his twin brothers, cousin Xander and Baron Sir Lewis Shaw.

    Regards Q

  15. So as someone who listened to lots of noise from county, folk songs, to modern day stuff, through the seventies and eighties, I believe I have a solid understanding what it sounds like when you got somethin that cripples the peaceful surface of your soul and you love it. Yep that`s heavy metal, from Black Sabbath, Dio, DC, `Tallica, Maiden, Megadeth, Motorhead, Death, Sepultura, Rage against the machine, Soundgarden, Tyrant, Violent force, Overkill, Arch enemy, The scorpions, Slayer, even Marilyn Manson...ring a bell? Hahaha yeah The ultimate noise makers, I like a lot of a lot of genres, but what made the stereotype that all of em are satanists? Is it the lyrics? Or the harsh and beast like sounds? Or was it people like "I wish I could play like that..." ? Not saying that metal is all there is, but I`m kind of interested how it all became evil?

  16. It's been a hard Christmas for me in many ways, It's been the the first without my dad who was my best friend. But I was determined that even after all the tough times I've been through these past few months that I would honour the commitments that I made for the Christmas period, it's meant hard work but I have thoroughly enjoyed it and spent time with a lot of fantastic and interesting people.

     

    It's a simple question, tell us about the best Christmas present that you ever received and why it means so much to you. I'll start the ball rolling.

     

    I've had many 'best' Christmas presents, but one of them I got this year. Daft as it may sound to many it was a half a glass of wine and it means more to me that all of the expensive presents that I received. The reason is soppy but simple really.

     

    Ten of us worked hard, but we enjoyed it, we cooked six medium sized turkeys and four ham joints, prepared and cooked approximately fifty pounds of potatoes, twenty ponds each of broccoli, cauliflower, carrots and sprouts and a gallon of gravy. To follow that ten large Christmas puddings and a gallon of custard. We also made up nearly eighty small hampers each containing a few sandwiches, a couple of mince pies, a slice of Christmas cake and a few other little goodies. We fed as many people as we could yesterday, nothing was left over, some where homeless, some were lonely and some are on very low incomes. Those that could afford to left a small donation, all showed their appreciation by saying thank you, that in itself means a lot and all that we hoped for. But one small group of homeless people had chipped in and bought a bottle of wine to present to us, between ten of us we got about a half a glass each. We were all moved by this small but meaningful gesture from people that have so little. It means a lot to us as it was a gift from the heart, this made even more enjoyable.

     

    Please share with us what your best present was and why.

  17. Warning guys - female reproductive issues

     

    This past Tuesday I had a total hysterectomy after 10 years of dealing with endometrial hyperplasia. After the surgery, the gyn examined a suspicious ovarian cyst and determined it is cancer. Good news, the cyst was intact and he believes he got it all, but sent everything off to a lab to be sure. Waiting on the results is wearing me down. Hormone induced mood swings probably aren’t helping. And no, I’m not a candidate for hormone replacement due to a high blood clot risk.

  18.  

    I know I’ve said this before; I always wanted a marriage like my parents have. Of course, I knew it wouldn’t be traditional, given the fact I am Gay, but I wanted it all the same.

     

    As I hung with friends, played baseball and hockey, went through school, I came to realize I was often assuming a dominant position, and often asked to lead. It was sort of a natural thing.  I ended up in school taking criminology and socio-legal studies, and received my degree. I went on to become a police officer and eventually a detective.

     

    While I was still a uniformed officer, I accepted who I was: a Dominant Sadist. I read and spoke to people and dipped my toes into the world of BDSM, and D/s. I met John, a friend and mentor who was also a cop at the time.

     

    I learned more and dated. Submissive men were attracted and attractive to me. Yet it was an unsettled life. The boys came and went. I still wanted to find, him—the one.

     

    I’ve written about that before, meeting tim.

     

    We have been together now for ten years, married for nine of them. We have had ups and downs. We have made mistakes, yet we remain together.

     

    Recently, when our anniversary was upon us, we talked about why and what our relationship is, and means.

     

    We both feel we are as strong as we are because of our chosen lifestyle: D/s. It is a journey. The relationship between us a living thing. Love needs tending. It needs thought and touch. It needs the everyday small things.  There are few arguments in our house, because we both accept our roles within our relationship. When you accept that, there is little to fight about.

     

    In our case our life needs discipline, strictness, pain, honesty and above all else, it needs trust. tim’s trust and belief in me is at its strongest now, I think. It is a fine line, this place of Dom/boy/husbands. Yet, it can work. You both must want it and you must both be headed in the same direction. Our destination is the horizon.

     

    After ten years you’d think things and feelings would wane.

     

    Last night tim, was tired. I put him to bed with his natural calm and some reading. He fell asleep and when I returned, I settled him down. I lay with him, holding him to me. He pushed back and moved in my arms, telling me of his desire. Wiggling … still after all these years. Those feelings still strong between us.

     

    I whispered, “you need to sleep, boy.”

     

    There was a small sigh … Doms hate sighs!

     

    But I couldn’t help but smile as he snuggled back and replied, “Yes, Sir.”

     

    All is right in my world.

     

    I hope it is in yours. I wish you all a wonderful Christmas/Holiday Season and a joyous New Year.

  19.  

     

    The Things They Carried is a wonderful book. 

     

    It is a book about the Vietnam war, especially about a group of American soldiers. I've read a few books about the war, and I've always been fascinated about the treatment of those returning. No ticker tape parades for them. Bad things happened in that police action, I know.

     

    This book was written by Tim O'Brien. He himself is written into the story because he was there, yet it is fiction. And I cannot be positive, but I'm sure much of it is true, though it is fiction. It's an intense book of short stories which are masterfully melded together. Tom O'Brien is a talented writer. This book was nominated for the Pulitzer Prize.  His style is clear and the language used is simple. Yet, it is emotional, you cannot, not continue, it is just that powerful. 

     

    It is about men. Soldiers. The ugliness of war and their reaction to it was hard to read. So much so, there were times i had to  put the book aside for a day.

     

    There are stories, for example, about Tim climbing a tree to pick up the parts of his friend, Curt Lemon that he could retrieve, and dropping them to the ground. Curt had been laughing one minute and then stepped on a mine. Rat Kiley's reaction after Curt's death, when they came across a lone baby water buffalo is difficult to read and imagine. I put the book down for a day at that point.

     

    But i think if you're a man you should read this. If you want to understand what men are capable of in good and bad times, you should read this. I think if you want to see beautiful writing you should read this.

     

    There is one interesting chapter called Good Form:

     

    It's time to be blunt.

     

    I'm forty-three years old, true, and I'm a writer now, and a long time ago I walked through Quang Ngai Province as a foot soldier.

    Almost everything else is invented.

     

    But it's not a game. It's a form. Right here, now, as I invent myself, I'm thinking of all I want to tell you about why this book is written as it is. For instance, I want to tell you this: twenty years ago I watched a man die on a trail near the village of My Khe. I did not kill him. But I was present, you see, and my presence was guilt enough. I remember his face, which was not a pretty face, because his jaw was in this throat, and I remember feeling the burden of responsibility and grief. I blamed myself. And rightly so, because I was present.

     

    But listen. Even that story is made up.

     

    I want you to feel what I felt. I want you to know why story-truth is truer sometimes than happening-truth.

     

    Here is the happening-truth. I was once a soldier. There were many bodies, real bodies with real faces, but I was young then and I was afraid to look. And now, twenty years later, I'm left with faceless responsibility and faceless grief.

     

    Here is story-truth. He was a slim, dead, almost dainty young man of about twenty. He lay in the center of a red clay trail near the village of My Khe. His jaw was in his throat. His one eye was shut, the other eye was a star-shaped hole. I killed him

     

    What stories can do, I guess is make things present.

     

    I can look at things i never looked at. I can attach faces to grief and love and pity and God. I can be brave. I can make myself feel again.

     

    "Daddy, tell the truth." Kathleen can say, "did you ever kill anybody?" And I can say, honestly, "Of course not."

     

    Or I can say, honestly, "Yes."

     

    I wrote the above chapter out because to me it is very telling, and i understand it. It is back and forth, yin and yang, it is much like war and Vietnam itself.

     

    The Things They Carried is a beautiful book. It is a book about human grace, horror, humanity, love, guilt and sorrow.

     

    I dare you to read it.

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    Recent Entries

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    Music

     

     

     

     

    Track List

    1. Video Killed The Radio Star (Ben Folds Five Cover Of The Buggles) - General Theme
    2. Images Of Heaven (Peter Godwin) - Dream Out Of Reach
    3. Billboard (If I’m Honest) (Jacob Whitesides) - Taken For Granted
    4. Show You (Shawn Mendes) - Not Settling For Second Place
    5. He Likes Boys (Simone Battle) - Lori’s Deal
    6. All Eyes On You (St. Lucia) - Chance Encounters
    7. Shooting Stars (Bag Raiders) - Bridging The Gap
    8. Two Weeks (Grizzly Bear) - Return To Distance
    9. Dazed And Confused (Ruel) - He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not
    10. Take On Me (A-ha) - Risk and Reward
    11. Beautiful Soul (Jesse McCartney) - In Love With Your No. 1 Fan
    12. Midnight City (M83) - Dreaming While Awake
    13. Boys Just Want To Have Fun (Team Heartbreak) - Giggles and Gumdrops
    14. Tongue Tied (Geographer) - More Than A Memory
    15. Kiss The Boy (Keiynan Lonsdale) - Momentum
    16. Obvious (CHPTRS) - Something Better, Something Real (Jesse 101 Love Theme)
    17. Touch (Troye Sivan)  - Eight and A Half Minutes
    18. Who We Are (Tristan Prettyman) - The Madness and the Ache
    19. Internet Killed The Video Star (The Limousines) - Counter-Theme
    20. Obvious (Alternate Version) (CHPTRS) - Love Theme Reprise

    ————————————

     

    Video Killed The Radio Star (Ben Folds Five Cover Of The Buggles) - General Theme

     

    I heard you on the wireless back in fifty two

    Lying awake intent at tuning in on you

    If I was young it didn't stop you coming through

    Oh a oh

     

    They took the credit for your second symphony

    Rewritten by machine on new technology

    And now I understand the problems you can see

    Oh a oh

     

    I met your children

    Oh a oh

     

    What did you tell them?

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

     

    Pictures came and broke your heart

    Oh, a, a, a, oh

     

    And now we meet in an abandoned studio

    We hear the playback and it seems so long ago

    And you remember the jingles used to go

    Oh-a oh

     

    You were the first one

    Oh-a oh

     

    You were the last one

     

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

    In my mind and in my car, we can't rewind we've gone to far

    Oh-a-aho oh

    Oh-a-aho oh

     

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

    In my mind and in my car, we can't rewind we've gone too far

    Pictures came and broke your heart

    Put down the blame on VCR

     

    Oh, you are a radio star

    You are a radio star

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

     

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

    Video killed the radio star

     

    Images Of Heaven (Peter Godwin) - Dream Out Of Reach

     

    Nothing is sacred

    So, give me your soul

    Nothing is wasted

    On someone like you

     

    Somebody killed me

    And tore out my heart, my love

    Somebody killed me

    Because of you

     

    And there's nothing I can do

    The media made you

    There's nothing I can do

    'cause you don't exist

    you don't exist

     

    Just images of heaven

    that take me to hell

    Images of heaven

    Of something to sell

    Images of heaven

    Images of heaven

     

    Something possessed me

    An image of you, my love

     

    Video visions

    That play on my mind

     

    Nobody blessed me

    With power to reach, my love

     

    When you're an illusion

    You can still be divine

     

    And nobody believes

    In this new religion

    Yeah nobody believes

    'cause nobody sees

    nobody sees

     

    Images of heaven

    Take me to hell

    Images of heaven

    of something to sell

    Images of heaven

    Images of heaven

     

    Images of heaven

    Images of heaven

     

    And there's nothing I can do

    The camera made you

    There's nothing I can do

    'Cause you don't exist

    You don't exist

     

    Just images of heaven

    that take me to hell

    Images of heaven

    Of something to sell

    Images of heaven

    Images of heaven

     

    Billboard (If I’m Honest) (Jacob Whitesides) - Taken For Granted

     

    Hello

    Where have you been?

    You're about to miss it all

    I would give anything to hear you call

    If I'm honest

     

    Sometimes

    It's all that I can do to keep my head up high

    I'm like a book with empty pages inside

    Cold wind blowing through the window shade

    I'm calling, what else can I say?

     

    I'm like a billboard in the sky

    How many times you passed me by-y-y

    You passed me by

    You're like a blinking neon light

    How many times I bought your lies

    Sometimes I wonder why

    If I'm honest

     

    My life

    It's not as easy as I make you think

    I close my eyes and I try not to blink

    If I'm honest

    Cold wind blowing through the window shade

    I'm falling faster each and every day

     

    I'm like a billboard in the sky

    How many times you passed me by-y-y

    You passed me by

    You're like a blinking neon light

    How many times I bought your lies

    Sometimes I wonder why

     

    Come back, come back

    Please don't leave me all alone

    Come back, come back

    I'm right here

    Come back, come back

    I'm willing if you are

     

    I'm like a billboard in the sky

    How many times you passed me by

    You passed me by

    You're like a blinking neon light

    How many times I bought your lies

    Sometimes I wonder why

     

    I'm like a billboard in the sky

    How many times you passed me by

    Passed me by

    You're like a blinking neon light

    How many times I bought your lies

    Sometimes I wonder why

    If I'm honest

     

    Show You (Shawn Mendes) - Not Settling For Second Place

     

    You can’t walk the streets at night

    You're way too short to get on this ride

    No I'm not, no I'm not, they're tryna tell me that I

    I gotta be home when the street lights glow?

    You can’t watch your TV show

    I will watch what I wanna watch

    No, won’t listen to you, do what I wanna do

     

    And I will walk this road ahead

    One hundred miles on my hands

    Do I need to show you?

    Guess I gotta show you

    And if you don't believe me now

    I'll flip the whole world upside down

    Do I need to show you?

    Guess I gotta show you

     

    Watch me swim across this lake

    Fly through the sky in my Superman cape

    Watch me walk across this wire

    Tip-toe through the coals of a blazing fire

    Watch me fly this kite in the rain

    I’ll jump rope with my ball and chain

    Come by and knock on my house of cards

    If it falls I'll rebuild it from the start

    I won’t listen to you, do what I wanna do

     

    And I will walk this road ahead

    One hundred miles on my hands

    Do I need to show you?

    Guess I gotta show you

    And if you don't believe me now

    I'll flip the whole world upside down

    Do I need to show you?

    Guess I gotta show you

     

    Do I really gotta show you now? Really, really, really, gotta show you now?

    Do I really gotta spell it out? I-T, I spelled it out

    If you really wanna see me now? Watch me walk across the clouds

    I don’t know what you heard about, listen to me yell it loud

    Do I really gotta show you now? Really, really, really, gotta show you now?

    Do I really gotta spell it out? I-T, I spelled it out

    If you really wanna see me now? Watch me walk across the clouds

    I don’t know what you heard about, see that door I'll knock it down

     

    And I will walk this road ahead

    One hundred miles on my hands

    Do I need to show you?

    Guess I gotta show you

    And if you don't believe me now

    I'll flip the whole world upside down

    Do I need to show you?

    Guess I gotta show you

     

    Do I really gotta show you now? Really, really, really, gotta show you now?

    Do I really gotta spell it out? I-T, I spelled it out

    If you really wanna see me now? Watch me walk across the clouds

    Do I need to show you? Guess I gotta show you

     

    He Likes Boys (Simone Battle) - Lori’s Deal

     

    Sexy hair, gorgeous smile

    He's the most perfect guy

    I've come across

    In a while

    Sensitive, real sweet

    He even watches Desperate Housewives

    With me

     

    My heart's beating like a mini drum

    I told my best friends he's the one

    I said I think that I'm in love this time

    They told me something that could change my mind

     

    He likes boys

    Finally now it's all making sense

    He likes boys

    I like this guy but he's on the fence

    He likes boys

    Can't believe this happened again

    He likes boys

    oh oh boys oh oh

     

    Manicured, finger tips

    He dresses like an American Apparel mannequin

    Guess it is kind of odd

    That he's a such a big fan of Lady Gaga

     

    My heart's beating like a mini drum

    I don't believe he will lead me on

    But now I'm startin' to see all the signs

    Is it true? Have I lost my mind?

     

    He likes boys

    Finally now it's all making sense

    He likes boys

    I like this guy but he's on the fence

    He likes boys

    Can't believe it's happened again

    He likes boys

    oh oh boys oh oh

     

    He likes boys

    Finally now it's all making sense

    He likes boys

    I like this guy but he's on the fence

    He likes boys

    Can't believe it's happened again

    He likes boys

    oh oh boys oh oh

     

    I don't think I could take

    This kind of rejection

    I guess it's time to take it in

    My gaydar needs some inspection

    I thought him an me

    Were the perfect we

    I guess I'll move on to plan B

    We both like vintage shopping

    and we both like

     

    Boys

    Finally now it's all making sense

    We like boys

    It's a love story with a twist

    We like boys

    I find a new gay best friend

    He likes boys

    oh oh boys oh oh boys

    We like boys

    Finally now it's all making sense

    We like boys

    It's a love story with a twist

    He likes boys

     

    All Eyes On You (St. Lucia) - Chance Encounters

     

    I will never take back

    The words that I said then

    I will always come back to you

     

    Even in the meantime

    I will always stand by

    A mirror on the shelf

     

    Call you in the nighttime

    Call you in the daytime

    Can't fess up to you

     

    'Cause I hope

    We will never have to take back

    What we said in the night

    I hope that I will always have

    All eyes on you

    Know that I will take what I can

    When you are there standing by

    Soft, spoken in the dead of night

    All eyes on you

     

    I will never take back

    The words that I said then

    I always knew I'd come back to you

     

    Even in the meantime

    I will always stand by

    A mirror on the shelf

     

    'Cause I hope

    We will never have to take back

    What we said in the night

    I hope that I will always have

    All eyes on you

    Know that I will take what I can

    When you are there standing by

    Soft, spoken in the dead of night

    All eyes on you

     

    I hope

    We will never have to take back

    What we said in the night

    I hope that I will always have

    All eyes on you

    Know that I will take what I can

    When you are there standing by

    Soft, spoken in the dead of night

    All eyes on you

    [x3]

     

    All eyes on you

    All eyes on you

     

    Shooting Stars (Bag Raiders) - Bridging The Gap

     

    It's late and I'm awake

    Staring at the wall

    Open up my window

    Head floats out the door

     

    No one else around

    The shimmer takes my eye

    I lift my head

    Blinded by the sky

     

    Feel my weight in front

    Following the sound

    Moves away so fast

    Fall down to the ground

     

    I know there's more to come

    Jump back to my feet

    Now I only see ahead of me

    Chasing down the street

     

    Gave my love to a Shooting Star

    But he moves so fast

    That I can't keep up

    I'm chasing

     

    I'm in love with a Shooting Star

    But he moves so fast

    When he falls then

    I'll be waiting

     

    Two Weeks (Grizzly Bear) - Return To Distance

     

    Save up all the days

    A routine malaise

    Just like yesterday

    I told you I would stay

     

    Would you always?

    Maybe sometimes?

    Make it easy?

    Take your time

     

    Think of all the ways

    Momentary phase

    Just like yesterday

    I told you I would stay

     

    Every time you try

    Quarter half a mile

    Just like yesterday

    I told you I would stay

     

    Would you always?

    Maybe sometimes?

    Make it easy?

    Take your time

     

    Would you always?

    Maybe sometimes?

    Make it easy?

    Take your time

     

    Always

    Sometimes

    Easy

    Time

     

    Dazed And Confused (Ruel) - He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

     

    You came in swinging like Apollo

    I'll be feeling it tomorrow

    No, I ain't seeing straight, hyperventilate

    Knees begin to wobble

    You cut my brakes and hit the throttle

    I couldn't stop it if I wanted

    Dizzy silhouette, makes me break a sweat

    I'm in trouble

     

    Oh, I've been Dazed and Confused

    From the day I met you

    Yeah, I lost my head

    And I'd do it again

    Either I've seen the light

    Or I'm losing my mind

    There's something 'bout you

    That's got me dazed and confused

     

    Dazed

    Dazed and Confused

    Dazed

     

    I bet you know just what you're doing

    You're not the type that's used to losing

    First, you build me up, then with just a touch

    Leave me here in ruins

    Something 'bout your eyes

    I can't even walk in a straight line

    Under the influence

     

    Oh, I've been Dazed and Confused

    From the day I met you

    Yeah, I lost my head

    And I'd do it again

    Either I've seen the light

    Or I'm losing my mind

    There's something 'bout you

    That's got me Dazed and Confused

     

    Dazed

    Dazed and Confused

    Dazed

     

    I don't know if this is real life, real life

    What happens if I open my eyes, my eyes?

    Will I ever get my head right, head right?

    I don't know if this is real life, real life

     

    Oh, I've been dazed and confused

    From the day I met you

    Yeah, I lost my head

    And I'd do it again

    Either I've seen the light

    Or I'm losing my mind

    There's something 'bout you

    That's got me

     

    That's got me Dazed and Confused

    From the day I met you

    Yeah, I lost my head

    And I'd do it again

    Either I've seen the light

    Or I'm losing my mind

    There's something 'bout you

    That's got me Dazed and Confused

     

    Take On Me (A-ha) - Risk and Reward

     

    We're talking away,

    I don't know what

    I'm to say...

    I'll say it anyway:

    Today's another day to find you,

    Shying away.

    I'll be coming for your love, okay?

     

    Take on me (take on me)

    Take me on (take on me)

    I'll be gone,

    In a day or two.

     

    So, needless to say,

    I'm odds and ends.

    But I'll be,

    Stumbling away,

    Slowly learning that life is okay, though

    Say after me,

    "It's no better to be safe than sorry"

     

    Take on me (take on me)

    Take me on (take on me)

    I'll be gone,

    In a day or two.

     

    The things that you say,

    Oh, is it life, or

    Just to blame my worries away?

    You're all the things I've got to remember.

    You're shying away,

    I'll be coming for you anyway.

     

    Take on me (take on me)

    Take me on (take on me)

    I'll be gone,

    In a day or two.

     

    Beautiful Soul (Jesse McCartney) - In Love With Your No. 1 Fan

     

    [Intro:]

    I don't want another pretty face

    I don't want just anyone to hold

    I don't want my love to go to waste

    I want you and your beautiful soul

     

    I know that you are something special

    To you I'd be always faithful

    I want to be what you always needed

    Then I hope you'll see the heart in me

     

    [Chorus:]

    I don't want another pretty face

    I don't want just anyone to hold

    I don't want my love to go to waste

    I want you and your beautiful soul

    You're the one I wanna chase

    You're the one I wanna hold

    I won't let another minute go to waste

    I want you and your beautiful soul

    Your beautiful soul, yeah

     

    You might need time to think it over

    But I'm just fine moving forward

    I'll ease your mind

    If you give me the chance

    I will never make you cry c'mon let's try

     

    [Chorus:]

    I don't want another pretty face

    I don't want just anyone to hold

    I don't want my love to go to waste

    I want you and your beautiful soul

    You're the one I wanna chase

    You're the one I wanna hold

    I won't let another minute go to waste

    I want you and your beautiful soul

     

    Am I crazy for wanting you?

    Maybe do you think you could want me too?

    I don't wanna waste your time

    Do you see things the way I do?

    I just wanna know that you feel it too

    There is nothing left to hide

     

    [Chorus:]

    I don't want another pretty face

    I don't want just anyone to hold

    I don't want my love to go to waste

    I want you and your beautiful soul

    You're the one I wanna chase

    You're the one I wanna hold

    I won't let another minute go to waste

    I want you and your soul

     

    I don't want another pretty face

    I don't want just anyone to hold

    I don't want my love to go to waste

    I want you and your beautiful soul

     

    Ooooooo

    Beautiful soul, yeah

     

    Oooooo, yeah

    Your beautiful soul

    Yeah

     

    Midnight City (M83) - Dreaming While Awake

     

    Waiting in the car

    Waiting for a ride in the dark

    At night the night city grows

    Look at the horizon glow

     

    Waiting in the car

    Waiting for a ride in the dark

    Drinking in the lights

    Following the neon signs

     

    Waiting for a word

    Looking at the milky skyline

    The city is my church (city is my church)

    It wraps me in its blinding twilight

     

    Waiting in a car

    Waiting for a ride in the dark

    Waiting in a car

    Waiting for the right time

    Waiting in a car

    Waiting for the right time

    Waiting in a car

    Waiting for the right time

    Waiting in a car

    Waiting for the right time

    Waiting in a car

    Waiting for the right time

    Waiting in a car

    Waiting for the right time

     

    Boys Just Want To Have Fun (Team Heartbreak) - Giggles and Gumdrops

     

    (Funny take on Cyndi Lauper’s ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun)

     

    Tongue Tied (Grouplove) - More Than A Memory

     

    Take me to your best friend's house

    Go around this roundabout

    Oh yeah

    Take me to your best friend's house

    I loved you then and I love you now

    Oh yeah

     

    Don't take me tongue tied

    Don't wave no goodbye

    Don't...

    Right!

     

    Take me to your best friend's house

    Marmalade we're making out

    Oh yeah

    Take me to your best friend's house

    I loved you then and I love you now

     

    Don't take me tongue tied

    Don't wave no goodbye

    Don't...

    Right!

     

    One, two, three, four

    Don't leave me tongue tied

    Let's stay up all night

    I'll get real high

    Slumber party; pillow fight

    My eyes on your eyes

    Like Peter Pan up in the sky

    My best friend's house tonight

    Let's bump the beats till beddy-bye

     

    Don't take me tongue tied

    Don't wave no goodbye

    Don't take me tongue tied

    Don't kiss me goodnight

    Don't...

     

    Take me to your best friend's house

    Go around this roundabout

    Oh yeah

    Take me to your best friend's house

    I loved you then and I love you now

     

    [2x]

    Don't leave me tongue tied

    Don't wave no goodbye

    Don't leave me tongue tied

    Don't...

     

    Kiss The Boy (Keiynan Lonsdale) - Momentum

     

    I've been afraid of my place

    Of this way

    Of my feelings

    But I'm amazed at how we talk

    It's so chill

    But there's tension

    What was the deal when your eyes locked on me

    What was the deal when you smiled at me like that

    You see I try to be cool

    But the problem is

     

    You messing my emotions up

    My air gets stuck

    I'm scared to show just how I feel 'cause people talk

    Don't want to worry 'bout whatever

    Just got to know your deal

    See, half the time I'm wondering if this is real

    Why not say something's on my mind if I feel love

    But when the moment's right I freeze

    That's how I know my heart is his

     

    If you want to kiss the boy

    Then you better kiss the boy right now

    You ain't got to be afraid

    Of the words you want to say right now

    'Cause love is a game we deserve to play out loud

    So if you wanna

    Then you better kiss the boy

    Oh, you better kiss the boy right now

     

    Give into love

    Give into love

    Give it the time

    Give it the time

    If it's all a movie

    Then you'll see

    It's only about us two

    But the cost of trust is that you could throw it away

    Maybe it's overrated

    I probably shouldn't chase it

    But I can't stop the crazy within

     

    You messing my emotions up

    My head gets stuck

    I'm scared to show just how I feel 'cause people talk

    Don't want to worry 'bout whatever

    Just got to know your deal

    See, half the time I'm wondering if this is real

    I might not say the one thing on my mind

    'Cause it's too tough

    But we lose our chance when we don't try

    On second thought

    Yeah, I think I might

     

    So if you want to kiss the boy

    Then you better kiss the boy right now

    (right now, right now)

    You ain't got to be afraid

    Of the words you want to say right now

    'Cause love is a game we deserve to play out loud

    So if you wanna

    Then you better kiss the boy

    Oh, you better kiss the boy right now

     

    Don't want to hide

    Don't want to hide

    Most of my life I've been terrified

    Spending my days always questioning

    Am I wrong to love a man

    I realized

    I realized

    Ain't gotta hide this heart of mine

    I'm gonna fight just to let you know

    To open your light and let it glow

     

    So if you want to kiss the boy

    Then you better kiss the boy right now

    (Oh, yeah)

    You ain't gotta be afraid

    Of the words you want to say right now

    (You gotta say it baby)

    'Cause love is a game we deserve to play out loud

    (We deserve our love)

    So if you want to play

    Then you better kiss the boy

    Oh, you better kiss the boy right now

     

    If you want to kiss the boy

    Then you better kiss the boy right now

     

    Obvious (CHPTRS) - Something Better, Something Real

     

    Don’t tell me to calm down.

    Look all around us here

    Fall.  It’s easy to see from down here

    If I’m not swinging then the war is won

     

    Caught beforehand

    falling forward

    All in front of us

    Light bestowed

    the heavens open

    Was it obvious?

     

    Isn’t it obvious?

    You were right in front of me

    with the answer

    with the answer

     

    Sign on the dotted line  

    in the hands of authority now

    All that’s left now is time

     

     

    Touch (Troye Sivan)  - Eight and A Half Minutes

     

    Glow is low and it's dimming

    And the silence is ringing

    And I can almost feel your breath

    I can almost feel the rest

     

    Night is young and we're living

    Hands move, moving steady

    And the time is moving slower

    I can feel we're getting closer, closer

     

    Standing in the eye of the storm

    My eyes start to roam

    To the curl of your lips

    In the center of eclipse

    In total darkness I, I reach out and touch

     

    My mind's gone on racing

    On a horse that's escaping

    And I'm ready to jump,

    Yeah, I'm ready to swim

     

    Life is chances that are taken

    But nothing's ever broken

    They're just pieces on the ground

    New hands need to build them

     

    My mind's gone on running

    My hands cut loose

    Yeah, but there's no need for answers

    Just the things you gotta do

     

    And I need you to trust

    That I'm lost and we must

    Get past all these rules

    We must choose

    To reach out and touch

     

    Standing in the eye of the storm

    My eyes start to roam

    To the curl of your lips

    In the center of eclipse

    In total darkness I, reach out and...

     

    Standing in the eye of the storm

    My eyes start to roam

    To the curl of your lips

    In the center of eclipse

    In total darkness I reach, I reach out and touch

     

    Who We Are (Tristan Prettyman) - The Madness and the Ache

     

    I would grant all your wishes

    If you promised me a thousand kisses

    I will never, love another, like you

    So give me all your secrets

    your fear and doubts, honey you don’t need them

    I will never, find another, like you

    And the airs getting thin

    Where the wings meet the wind

    We see it, we can feel it and we know this

    I believe in something more

    all the days that came before

    led us right to where we are

    right to where we are

    it’s all written in the stars

    we’ve already come so far

    and we can’t change who we are

    ah ah who we are

    ohhhhhhhh who we are

    ohhhhhhhh who we are

    I don’t have all the answers

    but right now is all the matters

    I could never, love another, like I loved you

    And we don’t have to understand

    fate always has the upper hand

    and fate choose me and you

     

    Internet Killed The Video Star (The Limousines) - Counter-Theme

     

    The kids are disco-dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    I try to tell them, "Hey, that drum machine ain't got no soul"

    But they don't want to listen, no

    They think they've heard it all

    They trade those guitars in for drum machines and disco balls

     

    We can't rewind now; we've gone too far

    Internet killed the video star

     

    The kids are disco-dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    Don't bother telling them that drum machine ain't got no soul

    The kids are disco-dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    Don't bother telling them that drum machine ain't got no soul

     

    You know we never listen; we think we've seen it all

    Like everything we're doing, no one's ever done before

    Did you hear what they said?

    That rock and roll is dead?

    Yeah, it's like a zombie: it will dig itself back up again

     

    Tune in the signal but it's fading

    Some ghost strumming his guitar on the radio

    Singing, "Oh, the glory days are gone

    But everything's okay, 'cause we still love our sex and drugs

    Just like the good ol' days"

     

    The kids are disco-dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    Don't bother telling them that drum machine ain't got no soul

    The kids are disco-dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    Don't bother telling them that drum machine ain't got no soul

     

    Well, I'm a horrible dancer; I ain't gonna lie

    But I'll be damned if that means that I ain't gonna try

    Yeah, I'm a shitty romancer, baby; I ain't gonna lie

    But I'll be damned if that means that I ain't gonna try

    Get up, get up, get up, and dance

    Get up, get up, get up, and dance

     

    The kids are disco-dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    Don't bother telling them that drum machine ain't got no soul

    The kids are disco-dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    Don't bother telling them that drum machine ain't got no soul

     

    The kids are disco dancing

    They're tired of rock and roll

    They're tired of rock and roll

    They're tired of rock and roll

     

    We can't rewind now; we've gone too far, oh

    The Internet killed the video star

    The Internet killed the video star

    The Internet killed the video star

     

    Obvious (Alternate Version) (CHPTRS) - Love Theme Reprise

     

    Love-in till fade-out.

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    Giorge Leedy
    Latest Entry

    I did a lot of research over the years trying to find the cheapest place in the world to live. The cheapest I found was about $500 dollars a month in Vietnam. I had no clue what the cost of living would be in the Philippines when I moved here last February. To my surprise, it is only about $200 dollars a month for a small home and everything I need, including the most important thing; the internet.

     

    I left my job in New York City for several reasons, but the most important one was because I had no retirement plan and needed to start getting serious about my future. So I quit my job and cut off all ties to my paycheck addiction.

     

    Having been here for 10 months, my small savings is about depleted. Facing the real possibility of going broke is scary, but I am not focused on that. I’m focused on succeeding and believe I will, as I have no other choice.

     

    It is said that one of the best ways to motivate oneself to succeed is to cut off all ties to plan B. That is what I did and now I will see if that was a super smart thing to do or extremely foolish.

     

    In moving to the Philippines, my plan was to start an online business here, which I have just begun. Now, I not only need to start earning money to continue surviving, but to move on to my next big adventure; Sicily. My plan is to move to Palermo, where I spent a month 5 years ago. While there, I dated several guys and had a really great time even though I could not speak their language.

     

    Starting a business can be a fairly quick and easy thing to do. But being a creative person who is married to my talents, I could never start just any business. I had to create my business from within- bringing my talents as a writer and artist to life. So while I could have started any business as soon as I got to the Philippines, I have been busy- up to now- creating.

     

    I only recently finished and published my novel, TO BE HIS LIFE - When A Straight Man Strays. The toughest part to get just right was the first interactions and sexual encounters between the main character, Mikey Lane, and the straight guy, Cole Landry. To fully evolve those scenes and Cole's character, I had to write Cole's character using a straight friend I know and love dearly. Once I did that, Cole's character and scenes evolved into what they needed to be. Since doing that, I have made it a rule to always use a real person I know in writing every character and scene, even if it is a minor character- like a waitress. Having done this in this novel, I have created some of the story’s best scenes in the most unlikely places with the most minor characters.

     

    While creating my products to sell took me a long time, that is not the hardest part of starting a business. The hardest part is marketing. I have been doing a lot of studying lately on this to get myself up to speed, but I am still lacking. I wish I had studied marketing long ago. It is something everyone who wants to start a business should do first, as it is what ultimately determines ones success or failure.

     

    I have also done a lot of studying on the law of attraction; aiming to better manifest the things I want to achieve in my life. But I have found some of these teachings problematic. One is that I don’t hear enough teachers telling people to try. Instead, they tell people they must absolutely believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that something is going to happen in order for them to manifest it. That is total bullshit. One of the biggest reasons people fail is because they never try. To succeed, you have to try. I am a high achiever and some of my greatest successes have resulted from facing my fears and doubts and trying to achieve the most difficult things regardless of how impossible they seemed.   

     

    Trying to succeed despite my fears is what I am busy doing right now. Not having enough money to buy a ticket out of the Philippines, I have every reason to be afraid. My back is up against the wall. There is no plan B. This is it. I have to start making money or else.

  20. Carlos Hazday
    Latest Entry

    Twenty years ago today, on December 1, 1998, the Miami-Dade County Commission approved the addition of sexual orientation to the county’s human rights ordinance. The battle many had fought over the past year culminated in victory. A temporary achievement since the hateful Christian Coalition worked to place the decision on the ballot the following year. They lost.

     

    For over a year, I helped increase awareness, raise money, conduct outreach, lobby politicians, debate homophobes, and granted countless interviews to the media. I was called vile names by those professing their Christianity often enough my dislike for the religion became permanent. To this day, any mention of Christian values makes me frown.

     

    On that fateful morning, my boyfriend and I awoke in darkness and were in front of the Commission chambers by sunrise. With hateful chants as background, I spoke to National Public Radio, The New York Times, the Voice of America, Armed Forces Radio, and who knows how many more outlets in both English and Spanish. My fifteen minutes of fame thanks to the marketing people thinking I spoke well and came across as a level-headed individual. Ha! Seeing my name on the front page of the Times and listening to the NPR report the following morning was a thrill. I still have the newspaper and a cassette of the radio show.

     

    However, the most wonderful part of the experience was working with the men and women who made the day’s events possible. Maybe it was not on par with the promise made by the signers of the Declaration of Independence to “mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our Sacred Honor,” but to me it was close. The time and financial commitment made by many propelled us to victory.

     

    Liebe Gadinsky stands out amongst all. The mother of two and her husband became friends, and although we rarely communicate these days, I will treasure the time I spent with them for as long as I live. Liebe and Seth were proof that the fight for our humanity was not limited to GLBT community members, but encompassed caring individuals who felt discrimination was unjust.

     

    Many of you dislike and dismiss political involvement, I read the comments often enough when I posted a story revolving around a presidential campaign. As an aside, my involvement back then influenced much of what I wrote in that book. I would like you all to remember that without drag queens fighting in front of the Stonewall Inn in 1969 or volunteers canvassing throughout Miami in 1998, most of us would be hiding in the back of a closet too scared to live. Go out, give money, volunteer, make phone calls, write letters; do whatever it takes to elect individuals who will not treat us as second-class citizens.

     

    It was the experience of a lifetime and I am grateful I was part of such a momentous event. My participation also allowed me to keep a promise I made when the Anita Bryant-backed forces led to the overturn of a similar ordinance in 1977. I swore that if the issue arose again, I would not remain quiet. I am glad I did not.

     

    I’ll close with Margaret Mead’s words: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has”

     

     

     

    https://www.nytimes.com/1998/12/02/us/2-decades-on-miami-endorses-gay-rights.html

     

  21. TetRefine
    Latest Entry

    I had probably the most enjoyable Thanksgiving ever last week. For the first time I didn't spend it with family, and instead did it with friends. I wish I had figured out how much more enjoyable it was doing it this way sooner, but better late then never. My boyfriend lives in New York, so Tuesday after work I hopped on a train up there to spend my Thanksgiving break with him. He had to bring his mom to the airport that night, so I met up with a friend I hadn't seen in a long time and we had dinner and drinks. Meeting up with someone you haven't seen in awhile is so much fun. You have so much to talk about, and can just go on and on catching up with each other. We hung out for almost four hours before finally saying goodbye. My boyfriend took off Wednesday, and we went exploring around some potential neighborhoods I could live in when I move there. That night we went to a house party of these two daddies who have this beautiful apartment in Hell's Kitchen, then went to a drag show at Therapy. While I'm not a big fan of drag, it was fun just getting drunk and hanging out with a group of people. Thursday morning I was supposed to take the train out to Long Island for thanksgiving with family, but was really dreading going. I love my family, but put all together at once they can be a lot to handle.

     

    Them: Oh you're gay?

    Me: Yeah.

    Them: Well you're still having kids right??

    Me: No.

    Them: Well you're still young, you'll change your mind eventually!

    Me: Okay. 

     

    As I was about to leave for Penn Station, I checked the Long Island Rail Road app for service advisories. If I believed in a god, I would say he granted me a miracle. There was a downed power line at one of the stations and it was causing huge delays and cancellations throughout the whole system. It gave me the perfect excuse to stay in the city. So instead, I plus-oned with my boyfriend to a friends-giving on the Upper West Side. It was cool because they live half a block from Central Park West, which is right where the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade goes through, so we watched a bit of the parade until it got too cold. It was the first time I'd ever seen the parade in person. We spent the next nine hours all just getting drunk, eating tons of food, gossiping, and just enjoying a big 'ole gay thanksgiving. It was an interesting mix of guys too. You had guys in their 60s all the way down to guys like us in our 20s. You had millionaire tech executives (the guy who hosted it all) to a guy who is a professional escort, to everyone in-between. I've been spending more and more weekends up in New York, and every time it gets harder and more depressing to go back home.

     

    I guess life here has changed a lot recently, and mostly not for the better. My roommate and best friend moved out of state, and she was a big source of support in my life. Another very close friend of mine got a new job and moved to Germany with his boyfriend. He has been my closest gay friend and party buddy since we met 3 years ago. With him gone, that has left a big social void too. I used to go out every weekend, and now I've only been out here in the city once in the last two months (and that was for his going-away party). To make matters worse, another close friend of mine moved with his boyfriend out to the far-flung suburbs and doesn't come into the city much anymore. He was probably my first real gay friend that I met back in college, and we've stayed close since. So I now have no close friends left around me on a daily basis, and not much of a social life to be had here anymore because of it. Because I know that I am moving next year and also because I'm so busy with other stuff, I've stopped investing much into my life here in Philly. I'm not really trying to make new friends, I'm not getting involved in anything outside of what I already am, and am instead putting that energy into making connections, both professionally and personally, in New York. I just don't see a reason to start over again here when I know I'm going to leave. I see investing in the future as a better option. That being said, I'm a bit sad at losing so much of what I had of my life here. I love this city with all my heart, and it gave me a great start in life. I made a lot of mistakes along the way, but I've come out in one piece.

     

    I'm also entering the final stretch of grad school, and the workload has absolutely skyrocketed. I'm routinely putting in 60 hours a week between work and school. Because I don't have much of a life here anymore, I've started falling into the workaholic mode again, which makes me low-level depressed. In a way it works, because I have so much that needs to get done and get done right that being able to focus like I do is important. In the next six months, I need to finish up all my remaining classes, take the New York State licensing tests (multiple ones), and then begin applying and interviewing for public school teaching jobs in New York City, which is a feat unto itself. If even the littlest piece has a crack, it throws off the entire plan. I'm such a nervous wreck right now because trying to balance all this for the next six months is exhausting and there's still so much time left to go. I am so motivated though. The one dream I've always had was to live in New York, and now I'll finally have the earning power to afford a good life there. My boyfriend lives there, and I definitely see long-term potential for us. 

     

    I'm of the attitude right now that this phase is just the challenge before the prize. If it all goes according to plan, I'll have the life I always dreamed of when I was a closeted 16 year old kid growing up in a depressing small town. I'm hoping it'll make the moment it all comes together that much more satisfying. Until then, I just gotta suck it up and push through. 

  22. Howdy y'all! :hug:  These last few weeks have been busy for me, to say the least.

     

    Without further ado, let's begin!

     

    PHYS 2425: In Week 11, we finished up on waves. My professor went over sound waves, the Doppler Effect, and finally the superposition of waves. In Week 12, we began new material, this time on Temperature. We learned about four different temperature scales: Celsius, Fahrenheit, Kelvin, and Rankine. We then learned how the raising and lowering of temperatures can affect the shape of objects, whether they are solids, liquids, or gases. Speaking of that last phase, my professor also went over the Ideal Gas Law. (And no, @Headstall, it's not how many 'pffts' a day are ideal. :P ) Anyways, Week 12 was also Exam Week for Physics. And... it was difficult. The median score for that exam was 58%. Well over half my class failed the third exam. And honestly, I am surprised that I didn't fail this exam, but it's not worth celebrating given how so few actually passed. Next, we have Week 13, this was Thanksgiving Week, so it would be a short one for classes. The College was open as usual on Monday and Tuesday, and closed at noon on Wednesday. So, in Physics, on Monday, we learned about Heat. And that's it for lectures this week. Wednesday morning, instead of the usual lecture, my professor held an Ask Me Anything for his classes. It was not mandatory, so students could choose to attend or not. I attended and it was really interesting. We ended up asking him about black holes, dark energy and dark matter. And, it just shows that is PhD was well deserved.

     

    MATH 2414: Week 11 was basically a review on what we learned since Exam 1, because Exam 2 was coming up. My teacher told us that this exam would be long, so it wouldn't be held during class, but would be taken in the Testing Center, which gives us as much time as we need to finish it. And as it turned out, it took me four hours to finish the second exam. Week 12 is when thing got interesting. We learned about the Indeterminate Form of the Limit, which led us to learning about L'Hopital's Rule. Basically, Indeterminate Forms are limits equal things like 0/0 or infinity over infinity. L'Hopital's rule simply state's that the limit (as x approaches c) of f(x)/g(x) is equal to the the limit (as x approaches c) of f'(x)/g'(x). In short, if you take the derivative of the numerator and of the denominator, you can find the limit that isn't in an indeterminate form. Next, we learned about Improper integrals, and how to use the limit to solve them. Then, in Week 12 things got really interesting. We learned about infinite sequences. And then, Week 13 came along... @Parker Owens Can you guess what we learned next?

    Spoiler

    Series

     

    These next few weeks are gonna be fun! :D 

     

    ENGR 1201: During Week 11, we prepared for an Exam on Universal Units. (Can y'all see the pattern here?) Then in Week 12, we took the exam and I got an A on it! Finally, on Monday of Week 13, we went to a computer lab to work on a computer program called MATLAB. Apparently it does things better than a graphing calculator so I was intrigued. But... the computers wouldn't work as they were supposed to. So, those plans were scrapped. Instead, she had us work on our design projects.

     

    Question: In regards to Physics, on Exam 1, the median score was 66, on Exam 2 it was 69, and on Exam 3 it was 58. The teacher has the responsibility to teach the material and the student has the responsibility to study that material. The question is, who has greater responsibility, the teacher or the student? Or do they bear equal responsibility. I'd love to hear your thoughts.

     

    Finally: I'm now registered for Spring 2019. I'll be taking the following classes:

    • Principles of Physics II
    • Calculus III
    • Differential Equations
    • Engineering Mechanics I (Statics)

     

    I'm looking forward to next semester!

  23. .

    Thanksgiving and the Adhesion Among Men

     

     

    @Parker Owens brought a certain song to my attention yesterday. I did a little digging on The Vacant Chair and learned a thing or two. Although the lyrics portray a Civil War family mourning the loss of a beloved son, the poem was actually written in tribute to love. Henry Stevenson Washburn was 48 years old when he met and watched 18-year-old John William Grout lead a charge and die in the Battle of Ball’s Bluff. The young lieutenant must have meant a great deal to the poet, and since the death occurred near the time of Thanksgiving, he imagined himself as a loved one gathered around the table with the rest of the dead boy’s family.

     

    This is the poem he wrote in tribute.

     

     

    The Vacant Chair

     

     

    We shall meet but we shall miss him.

    There will be one vacant chair.

    We shall linger to caress him,

    While we breathe our ev'ning prayer.

    When a year ago we gathered,

    Joy was in his mild blue eye.

    But a golden cord is severed.

    And our hopes in ruin lie.

     

    We shall meet, but we shall miss him.

    There will be one vacant chair.

    We will linger to caress him,

    When we breathe our ev'ning prayer.

     

    At our fireside, sad and lonely,

    Often will the bosom swell,

    At remembrance of the story,

    How our noble Willie fell.

    How he strove to bear our banner,

    Thro' the thickest of the fight,

    And uphold our country's honor

    In the strength of manhood's might.

     

    We shall meet, but we shall miss him.

    There will be one vacant chair.

    We will linger to caress him,

    When we breathe our ev'ning prayer.

     

    Lt.-J.-W.-Grout.jpg

     

    Composer George Root set it to music and moved the entire nation, both North and South. Here is a straightforward, but emotionally charged recording of the song.

     

     

     

     

    By the end of the war, and the carnage wrought by the murder of the president, Washburn and Root’s song took on national significance at Thanksgiving time.

     

    Walt Whitman memorialized the slain war hero like this:

     

    O how shall I warble myself for the dead one there I loved?

    And how shall I deck my song for the large sweet soul that has gone?

    And what shall my perfume be for the grave of him I love?

     

    Sea-winds blown from east and west,

    Blown from the Eastern sea and blown from the Western sea, till there on the prairies meeting,

    These and with these and the breath of my chant,

    I'll perfume the grave of him I love.

     

    2015spring_a-pilgrims-journey_1920x1080.

     

    And so I bid you all a happy Thanksgiving, and feel it’s appropriate to remember those who made this day about family and love.

     

    _

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