Love at what age?

[comicfan]

Sorry but I was reading a story on here and one of the secondary characters said something that just tossed me for a loop. Now I am curious to see if what I thought is common or not. Do you feel there is an age when you should give up looking to find love because, well you are just too old. Or do you believe that love springs eternal and no matter what age you are love is always a possibility? My need to know is peaked here and figured I would ask.

[Marzipan]

Falling in love and finding a special someone doesn't look age. I do think people look for different things in a person at different ages. And have different expectations about life. For some it means they would never settle for something that they thought was an ideal mate at their twenties, for some it means they have lowered their expectations from the sky hights.

 

I just believe everyone can find love, and if the timing is right keep it too.

 

 

[Y_B]

I think the last option will receive the overwhelming bit of votes because isn't it in most people's characters to believe in the idealistic concept of love, true love, life, and everything associated? I have rarely encountered a point of view suggesting otherwise

.

But the ironic thing is that there still exist a common belief that love fades with age if it still has not been found and that it becomes increasing harder as time goes on, and there's some slight truth to it.

 

This leads me to the conclusion that there is a discrepancy between people's beliefs and people's real life attitudes and actions. There isn't anything to suggest that people over a certain age actually do lose the ability to love or be loved. I even believe the idea of love grows in a person with age but the reality of the love/age correolation shows a trend suggesting something completely different, and it's its interesting and a bit sad at the same time.

 

 

[TetRefine]

I truly believe love has no age limit. Its easier (in my opinion) if you find it at a younger age, but being old is by no means a discriminatory factor. My grandma, who got divorced in 1979, got remarried in 1997 at the age of 71. She is still (much more happily) married to my grandpa. From my own experience, I found love where I very least expected it and I think that applies to a lot of people.

[K.C.]

TetRefine, you stole the words right out of my mouth. My Grandfather was killed at age 59 leaving my Grandmother alone. She lived another 25 years and found love a few more times on her way. She never remarried but she was very loved.

 

I feel so lucky that I found the love of my life so young, but If something happened to either of us, I would hope that we would go on to love again! Everyone needs that chance.

[Frostina]

I agree with Matt and Kc Grim Love can find you at any given time in your life... and often when u dont expect it... at all! so... Giving up is just NOT an option, methinks!

[Michael9344]

Love doesn't age but there's an age that your chance of feeling love clearly diminishes.

[K.C.]

Love doesn't age but there's an age that your chance of feeling love clearly diminishes.

 

 

I don't believe that. I agree that there is a large portion of society that is in committed relationships and the people on the market is slim pickings, but there is always a chance to find love. It's usually when you stop looking that you find it.

[comicfan]

I don't believe that. I agree that there is a large portion of society that is in committed relationships and the people on the market is slim pickings, but there is always a chance to find love. It's usually when you stop looking that you find it.

 

From your lips to my future lover's ears. lol. But I agree with you whole heartedly.

[TetRefine]

I don't believe that. I agree that there is a large portion of society that is in committed relationships and the people on the market is slim pickings, but there is always a chance to find love. It's usually when you stop looking that you find it.

 

Agreed 110%.

[Bleu]

I found love at 20, from a direction I was not looking at (i.e. in a a woman ). Sadly, disease and death brought our relationship —not the love— to an end. I sure am hoping to find love again, wherever it may come from.

 

I think that, as you age, your capacity for love is not affected. The feelings can be as strong at 60 as they were at 16. However, your experience makes you more prudent with how relationships work. Also, most of the time, by then you've found your place in society (job, friends, neighbours, etc.). So even if you fall head over heels for someone, there are many elements that will prevent you from demonstrating that love in exuberant ways. Whereas, when you're younger you're basically starting from scratch, so you can give yourself entirely, wildly, to that new love.

[Marzipan]

I found love at 20, from a direction I was not looking at (i.e. in a a woman ). Sadly, disease and death brought our relationship —not the love— to an end. I sure am hoping to find love again, wherever it may come from.

 

I think that, as you age, your capacity for love is not affected. The feelings can be as strong at 60 as they were at 16. However, your experience makes you more prudent with how relationships work. Also, most of the time, by then you've found your place in society (job, friends, neighbours, etc.). So even if you fall head over heels for someone, there are many elements that will prevent you from demonstrating that love in exuberant ways. Whereas, when you're younger you're basically starting from scratch, so you can give yourself entirely, wildly, to that new love.

 

 

Ditto.

 

And that is beautiful what you said about the never ending love to your wife.

 

Yoy'll find new love too one day Bleu.

[Tomas]

As a character in a movie said, "Age is just a number."

 

In my lifetime so far, almost 3/4 of a century, I have loved and been loved. Some small loves and two, what I would consider, great loves. The first lasted for 17 years. There was no acrimonious split. The romantic love kind of just faded. He found someone new and they were together for 15 years until he died of a heart attack a few years back. He and I remained great friends and still loved each other until his death. I too, found another love. We were together for 22 years until he died 2 years ago.

 

Am I actively attempting to look for and pursue a new love? No. I do not feel the need to do so, but if one does come along, I'm open to it with the right person. If it never happens, it won't bother me, but I don't believe that the capacity to love diminishes with age. That concept seems ridiculous to me.

 

I am loved. I have the love of friends and the places in my heart that were filled with the love of my two great loves is still filled and even though they are gone, I still feel the love that they shared with me.

 

Take Care

Tomas

 

[Nephylim]

I don't think that the capacity for love diminishes at all as we get older. I think that the practicalities of finding love make it more difficult as we age. By that I mean that people collect baggage. By the time you get to my age many people are or have been married, have children, jobs, committments, have been hurt by bad break ups and have closed their hearts to love.

 

Also people become more conservative as they grow older. Those who were rebellious in their teens and 20's who were punks, goths, potheads, ravers now wear suits and have families. My sister told me recently that I am never going to find someone like me because they will all have grown out of it by now. I don't think that's true but I do think that he/she will be more difficult to find now.

[rustle]

I don't think that the capacity for love diminishes at all as we get older. I think that the practicalities of finding love make it more difficult as we age. By that I mean that people collect baggage. By the time you get to my age many people are or have been married, have children, jobs, committments, have been hurt by bad break ups and have closed their hearts to love.

 

Also people become more conservative as they grow older. Those who were rebellious in their teens and 20's who were punks, goths, potheads, ravers now wear suits and have families. My sister told me recently that I am never going to find someone like me because they will all have grown out of it by now. I don't think that's true but I do think that he/she will be more difficult to find now.

 

 

I've found I'm capable of more and deeper love, as well as more and deeper ambivalence.

 

People don't "grow out of it." They slow down, and get caught by gravity and inertia. Most get worn down, and forget their passion through endless compromises.

[Contest4jen]

I think old people (like 70 and 80) falling in love is major cute.....There definately isnt an age limit.

Edited April 23, 2011 by Contest4jen

[Tipdin]

One can be in love at any age. Love does not fade away with time either. If it does, it wasn't real to begin with.

 

I have known many couples that enjoyed their relationships well into their golden years. My own parents have been together now for 60 years, they're like conjoined twins at this point - one could not survive long without the other.

 

Both set of my grandparents were married until one of them died. My great grandpa lived to be almost 100 years old and pined for his wife until the day he died. I knew a couple of guys that had been together since their early teens and were both in the eighties when I met them! They were clearly in love.

 

Love can come at any age, or any number of times. It can deepen, even become vital for the health of one or both individuals.

[comicfan]

I thank you all for your responses. I guess the story had hit me hard. Funny but when i least seemed to look bam, I suddenly seem to have two suitors. But that is another whole story. I appreciate your candid answers.

[old bob]

I think old people (like 70 and 80) falling in love is major cute.....There definately isnt an age limit.

 

Love at 82 (my age) and 83 (my wife's age). We fell in love when we were 22 and 23. And it's still going on (tenderness has just replaced lust ).

[Breeze]

I would like to think love can and will happen at any age. I am now 50 and my husband passed away last year. Although Im not ready to venture out there into dating hell, I would hope that love is out there waiting for me to find it some day. My grandparents were married for 59 years and the love and tenderness they showed in their last years are what I carry in my heart as what love can be.

[Krista]

You have to be pretty open to love for it to happen... fussing over age or being scared of being alone is actually something that can keep you from falling in love.. or messing some good relationships up.

[DragonMando]

My grandmother is nearly seventy and she just found it a couple years ago.

 

I'm only 20 and pretty sure I'm going to be foreveralone man. (note: do not read in depressed tone. I am currently ok with this, though I'm not always)

 

It's different for everyone

[Former Member]

A great-grandmother of mine was well into her seventies when a man who was at least ten years younger asked her to marry him. And he asked that out of love. To me, this is proof that love doesn't look at age. I'll keep looking for love until I find it, no matter how long it will take.

[Goedric]

Hmmm. First the poll itself is a bit offensive to me...

 

Maybe thats too harsh a word but really the very framing of the question is defeatist at best and agist if im being less forgiving.

 

One might argue that youger people in love haven't lived long enough to even know what love is, - if such is true then what many are talking about is sex or an emotional high. Before you youngsters hop up and down, i'm not saying that. I am saying one could make the argument.

 

There is no age limit or prerequistite on love or finding it. As we age our physical and emotional needs evolve and so do our relationships. And there is no age at which we should ever stop demaning the fullness of life, whether we are talking about finding a life parter, a good friend or a satisfying career.

[AFriendlyFace]

I think if I have any criticism of this question it is that seems to presuppose that "love" is a once in a lifetime experience. I think people can fall in love any number of times and have it go horribly wrong or phenomenally right any number of times.

 

My partner and I are very happy and very in love and I certainly expect that it will be the last forever (read till we're old and dead) type of love, but if one of dies or we unexpectedly break up then I certainly hope the remaining one (or both) of us move on to another happy love relationship - be it long or short term.

 

However, there's nothing wrong with being signal. I was thoroughly happy as a single person and would expect that hypothetically I could be again. I don't think one has to be "in love" to be happy.

 

Really, I think the main thing is just being ready and willing to take on what life throws at you. It's also important to know what you want to do what you can to make it happen.

 

Just my thoughts

 

Kevin

Edited May 21, 2011 by AFriendlyFace