Corrupt A Wish

[drpaladin]

3 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  But they're not ripe. 

 

I wish I was an American Ninja Warrior.  

Granted. You  trip over your own feet before you even get started. They offer you American Ninja Clown instead.

 

I wish I could find this knife.

[Valkyrie]

Just now, drpaladin said:

Granted. You  trip over your own feet before you even get started. They offer you American Ninja Clown instead.

 

I wish I could find this knife.

  That sounds more like me.  

 

Granted.  You find the knife in the hands of a serial killer. 

 

I wish I knew if I had to drive to Albany this weekend. 

[drpaladin]

50 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

  That sounds more like me.  

 

Granted.  You find the knife in the hands of a serial killer. 

 

I wish I knew if I had to drive to Albany this weekend. 

He'll love it. It has an 18" blade.

 

Granted. Now you start worrying about other things related to going to Albany you hadn't considered before.

 

I wish this itch would stop.

[Former Member]

2 hours ago, drpaladin said:

He'll love it. It has an 18" blade.

 

Granted. Now you start worrying about other things related to going to Albany you hadn't considered before.

 

I wish this itch would stop.

Granted. Itch stops, but is replaced by creepy tickling.

 

I wish to fly a helicopter.

[drpaladin]

1 minute ago, R J Drew said:

Granted. Itch stops, but is replaced by creepy tickling.

 

I wish to fly a helicopter.

Granted. You fly a helicopter, but since you don't really know how you secure it to a post with aircraft cable and fly it around and round. Unfortunately it pulls the post out of the ground and crashes in your front yard. (This actually happened to someone I know. It's what happens when you have more money than sense.)

 

I wish this story wasn't so interesting.

[Valkyrie]

35 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

Granted. You fly a helicopter, but since you don't really know how you secure it to a post with aircraft cable and fly it around and round. Unfortunately it pulls the post out of the ground and crashes in your front yard. (This actually happened to someone I know. It's what happens when you have more money than sense.)

 

I wish this story wasn't so interesting.

 

 

Granted.  The story takes a plot twist so stupid and contrived you stop reading it and throw it in the trash. 

 

I wish I was asleep.  

[drpaladin]

9 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

 

 

Granted.  The story takes a plot twist so stupid and contrived you stop reading it and throw it in the trash. 

 

I wish I was asleep.  

-Granted. You're asleep and yet reading and writing. Now you'll be tormented wondering what else you've done in your sleep.

 

I wish I hadn't slept most of the day.

[Valkyrie]

18 hours ago, drpaladin said:

-Granted. You're asleep and yet reading and writing. Now you'll be tormented wondering what else you've done in your sleep.

 

I wish I hadn't slept most of the day.

Granted.  You've been awake for a week. 

 

I wish America's Got Talent didn't have a new host. 

[Brayon]

4 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You've been awake for a week. 

 

I wish America's Got Talent didn't have a new host. 

 

Granted -  It just becomes reruns of last years program.

 

I wish I had something fun to do.

[Valkyrie]

1 minute ago, BHopper2 said:

Granted -  It just becomes reruns of last years program.

 

I wish I had something fun to do.

Granted.  You have something so fun to do you can't stop doing it and it takes over your whole life. 

 

I wish I had spent more time cleaning my house this weekend. 

[Brayon]

1 minute ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You have something so fun to do you can't stop doing it and it takes over your whole life. 

 

I wish I had spent more time cleaning my house this weekend. 

 

Granted - You've become OCD over cleanliness, and rush to clean every crumb.

 

I wish I had some Ice Cream.

[Valkyrie]

Just now, BHopper2 said:

Granted - You've become OCD over cleanliness, and rush to clean every crumb.

 

I wish I had some Ice Cream.

Granted.  You have a whole freezer full of tofu ice cream.   

 

I wish the people I work with were more courteous.  

[drpaladin]

50 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You have a whole freezer full of tofu ice cream.   

 

I wish the people I work with were more courteous.  

 

Granted. But now they think you're crude in comparison.

 

I wish I had some homemade brownies.

[Valkyrie]

3 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. But now they think you're crude in comparison.

 

I wish I had some homemade brownies.

Granted.  You have homemade flourless, sugarless, vegan brownies.  

 

I wish the cats didn't like to spazz out at 3:00 am.  

[drpaladin]

1 minute ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You have homemade flourless, sugarless, vegan brownies.  

 

I wish the cats didn't like to spazz out at 3:00 am.  

 

Granted. Now they spazz out all the time.

 

I wish my friend wasn't compelled to relate all the contents of the new Smithsonian before I get it.

[Valkyrie]

Just now, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. Now they spazz out all the time.

 

I wish my friend wasn't compelled to relate all the contents of the new Smithsonian before I get it.

Granted.  Your friend loses interest in you and never contacts you again. 

 

I wish I had a decent singing voice. 

[drpaladin]

2 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  Your friend loses interest in you and never contacts you again. 

 

I wish I had a decent singing voice. 

Granted. Now everyone else is tone deaf and can't tell.

 

I wish (still) I had gone to the store.

[Valkyrie]

1 minute ago, drpaladin said:

Granted. Now everyone else is tone deaf and can't tell.

 

I wish (still) I had gone to the store.

Granted.  You went to the store, but forgot your wallet. 

 

I wish my cable would stop screwing up the channels.  

[drpaladin]

2 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  You went to the store, but forgot your wallet. 

 

I wish my cable would stop screwing up the channels.  

 

Granted. Now it screws up the TV.

 

I wish there was something worth watching on TV.

[Valkyrie]

1 minute ago, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. Now it screws up the TV.

 

I wish there was something worth watching on TV.

Granted.  TV is so awesome it turns you into a couch potato zombie who only wants to watch awesome shows and drink pickle juice. 

 

I wish my cats would stop chewing on plastic. 

[drpaladin]

2 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  TV is so awesome it turns you into a couch potato zombie who only wants to watch awesome shows and drink pickle juice. 

 

I wish my cats would stop chewing on plastic. 

It's already on 24/7. The only difference is there are are no awesome shows.

 

Granted. You are tastier.

 

I wish I had gone outside today.

[Brayon]

8 hours ago, drpaladin said:

It's already on 24/7. The only difference is there are are no awesome shows.

 

Granted. You are tastier.

 

I wish I had gone outside today.

 

Granted - You went outside, and was locked out of the house. In Fact, you can no longer go inside any building.

 

I wish I could think of something, that's not recycling an earlier wish.

[Valkyrie]

1 hour ago, BHopper2 said:

I wish I could think of something, that's not recycling an earlier wish.

I think we all wish we could do that  

 

Granted.  Now your wishes are so amazing they can't be corrupted and no one wants to play the game anymore. 

 

I wish the room I usually use on Thursdays at work was available.  

Edited June 1, 2017 by Valkyrie

[drpaladin]

13 hours ago, Valkyrie said:

I think we all wish we could do that  

 

Granted.  Now your wishes are so amazing they can't be corrupted and no one wants to play the game anymore. 

 

I wish the room I usually use on Thursdays at work was available.  

Granted. It was available for a good reason, an unbearable stench coming from an undiscernable source.

 

I  wish @BHopper2 hadn't locked me out of my house. 

[Brayon]

59 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

Granted. It was available for a good reason, an unbearable stench coming from an undiscernable source.

 

I  wish @BHopper2 hadn't locked me out of my house. 

 

Granted -  You're now locked inside.

 

I wish my Prince will come.