A Fairy Out of Her Tale - Dear Diary - 70. Scene 70

WELCOME TO THE REMOTE ALWAYS WITH YOU DIARY SETTINGS MENU.

IF YOU WISH TO MODIFY CURRENT SETTINGS, PLEASE ERASE THE CURRENT SETTINGS AND RE-WRITE THEM AS APPROPRIATE, THEN CONFIRM WITH YOUR MAGIC SIGNATURE.

PLEASE NOTE NO CHANGES WILL BE SAVED WITHOUT THE MAGIC SIGNATURE.

IF YOU WISH TO CHANGE YOUR PASSWORD, PLEASE FILL IN THE FIELD BELOW:

CURRENT PASSWORD: reveal your true self, monster

NEW PASSWORD: [INSERT NEW PASSWORD]

PLEASE INPUT YOUR MAGIC SIGNATURE TO CONFIRM THE CHANGES.

PLEASE NOTE NO CHANGES WILL BE SAVED WITHOUT THE MAGIC SIGNATURE.

SETTINGS

THIS DIARY BELONGS TO: Hereweald Ctvrtnik Tesarik

DATE OF BIRTH: 28 March 1939

DATE OF OWNERSHIP OF THE DIARY: 28 March 1959

PURPOSE OF THIS DIARY: Mind-control, manipulation, collecting new servants

IF FOUND, RETURN TO: Manor House, Skull Island

MISSION STATEMENT

USE THE SPACE BELOW TO DETAIL YOUR COMMITMENT TO THE DIARY AND YOUR PLANS FOR ITS USE.

THE TEXT BELOW WILL FORM YOUR CONTRACT WITH THE DIARY. ANY INFRINGEMENT OF ITS TERMS AND CONDITIONS WILL RESULT IN TERMINATION OF THE CONTRACT.

ONCE YOU HAVE COMPLETED THIS SECTION TO YOUR SATISFACTION, SEAL IT WITH YOUR MAGIC. NO FURTHER ALTERATIONS TO THE WORDING WILL BE ALLOWED ONCE THE CONTRACT IS SEALED.

28 March 1959

I, Hereweald Ctvrtnik Tesarik, oldest child of General Ambrozh Harant Tesarik and Duchess-of-Arms Libushe Vrsovsci Ctvrtnik, hereby take ownership of this Remote Always With You Diary. This diary was given to me in acknowledgement of me reaching adulthood. I shall use it to aid my family in raising an army to take control of Skull Island. Once Skull Island is ours, we will further increase our army in order to take over other demon-inhabited continents.

This diary will act as bait to unsuspecting races. They will use the diary as if it was any blank book, unable to sense its magic power. My copy of the diary will show me everything that is written in its mirror version, and I will use the information to pick my targets. I will command my fellow demons in raids to capture those targets and perform the binding spells on them using the information obtained through this diary as a way to make the spells more efficient and long-lasting.

Once my targets have fallen under my power, I will reset the diary to blank and send it to a different location to re-start the cycle. Each target should stay with the diary for a minimum of one year, and for as long as it takes for me to understand their strengths, weaknesses, and to plan their place in my army. Although this is a slow conscripting method, it is among the most effective. Therefore, the servants acquired through this diary will receive specialised positions in the army, while the recruitment of disposable soldiers will be carried out by other, less time-consuming means. No target acquired through this diary shall be used in direct combat against other demons.

I swear the magic oath to remain faithful to the words written above and add my magic signature to assure their validity.

Hereweald Ctvrtnik Tesarik

CONTENT HISTORY

SELECT THE FILE YOU WISH TO VIEW. EACH FILE IS LABELLED AFTER THE MAIN PERSON WHO WROTE ON THE DIARY. A NEW FILE IS AUTOMATICALLY GENERATED EVERY TIME THE DIARY IS SET BACK TO BLANK MODE.

- AGNES GRIMESTONE, GIANT (1959-1962)

- ICHIWARU SADAME, SHAPE-SHIFTER (1962-1963)

- UIPORAN CEREJEIRA, FAIRY (1963-1965)

- HAROLD POTTER, DWARF (1965-1967)

- ROMILDA CLEARWATER, DWARF (1967-1970)

- AMARILDA JABUTICABA, FAIRY (1970-1971)

- ANKO UMIWASEGAWA, SHAPE-SHIFTER (1971-1974)

- UMI UMINO, SHAPE-SHIFTER (1974-1975)

- KIMIMARU UWAUCHI, SHAPE-SHIFTER (1975-1976)

- BOB SMITH, GIANT (1976-1978)

- MORUMPI MATAMATA/MORUMPI JACARANDA, FAIRY (1978-1994)

- NESSA JACARANDA, FAIRY (1995-)

19th July 1978

Hello, book!

I was told by the shop owner you're a special kind of book. I am meant to write here instead of reading your contents. Nobody is actually meant to read this other than me. It's weird, isn't it? Why bother writing if nobody else can see it?

I suppose I could use you to keep my memories of Pindaiba and Floresfada always vivid in my mind, since I don't really plan to live there ever again. It's not that I don't like the fairy lands, don't get me wrong! I think Floresfada is the best place in the world, like any other self-respecting fairy, but it's a bit... boring. The career I want, the life I want, is not something I can get while living there.

I want to learn everything there is to learn about food culture, the way people from all the races around the world make their food and what they think about it. My dream is to travel everywhere I can, learn the local tastes, try as many regional delicacies as I can (even the ones made with dead bodies. I'll make sure I pray to our Mother Deity so that any any lives lost can be properly honoured), and get them to teach me how to make them. One day, I'll write a book (not just a diary like this) with all the recipes I learned on my journey. It's going to be amazing!

My first stop in this life-time journey is Daisen. I'm in the capital, Enkyo, and I'll be here for a while. I'm actually at university, studying to be a chef (I figured I would get as many credentials as I could before I went around asking people to reveal their secrets to me). We're about to start the second semester of my first year in the course (it'll go on for 5), and so far it's been better than I expected. I'm neither the only fairy, nor the only foreign, nor the only non-shape shifter. Only about half the students are shape-shifters from Daisen. The other half includes a bit of everything, like foreign shape-shifters, giants born in Daisen, fairies from Floresfada and fairies from other continents (their accents are really weird!), and even refugee demons and albino angels. We expected them to fight at first sight, but they seem to get on well. Too well, some might say...

The reason I went to the shops today is because my cousin Jurandir told me his wife gave birth to their first child this morning. I'm so happy for them! I wanted to buy the baby some kind of gift, but I ended up finding this book instead (and then I bought a plushy armadillo for the baby afterwards).

Jurandir was my best friend when we were growing up. We are the same age (he's actually 6 months and 29 days younger, not that I keep track for the bragging rights or anything...), so it's only natural that we were drawn to each other that way. We have many siblings, but they're all a few years older or a few years younger, so it's not the same. And his wife, Nelma, was our other best friend. The three of us were inseparable from the moment we met.

You see, back when we were still young enough to count our ages in just our hands, our parents worked in the refurbishment/rebuilding of Pindaiba's Grand Temple, and they would drag Jurandir and I along after school so they could try to make us behave, but all that happened is that we turned the construction zone into our playground. Nelma was living in the temple, studying to serve the Mother Deity, and we sort of convinced her to sneak out and play with us. We played pranks on the Acolytes, hid our parents' equipment, all those kinds of things normal fairy children do to pass the time.

And then Nelma and Jurandir fell in love a few years later. It was such a beautiful love story! They were made for each other (occasional lovers aside). I think Jurandir would've taken things a bit slower, but Nelma has high ambitions of becoming the High Priestess of Pindaiba, which she can only do after having a child. So they got married as soon as they were old enough (poor Nelma had to wait months after turning 20 for Jurandir's birthday. She was so desperate!), and their baby was born 7 months later. Today.

Which probably means Nelma is not resting or spending time with her baby right now, but barging into the temple to demand her name be added to the candidates for the next High Priestess election. I feel sorry for the poor clerk dealing with her right now!

Anyway, I need to stop writing for now and send my gift to the new baby. And I'll probably see about a day's visit in a few weeks.

Do we need to sign our own diaries?

I might as well.

Morumpi

~*~

5 October 1978

Hello again, book!

Maybe I should have written again sooner, but not much happened in my life since my baby cousin was born. I don’t see the point in writting about my everyday life at university. It’s nothing special: I’ve made a few friends, the other fairies in my class are my occasional lovers (if only because we bonded in our inability to digest half the dishes we learn to make, and because other races don’t seem to get the concept of “occasional lovers” for some reason), and I still don’t miss Floresfada enough to abandon my life ambitions to return there forever.

That said, I’m now in Pindaiba. It’s a national holiday in Daisen now, the Family Week (in which the entire country stops for a week so that families can spend time together. There’s one of those every four months), so I’m getting on the spirit of the holiday and coming to stay with my parents. And of course, I’m also visiting Jurandir, Nelma, and their baby.

I’ve always had conflicting feelings about parenthood. Every fairy knows that we’re not properly close to Mother Deity until we’ve had our own children (biological or otherwise), but, to be honest, I’m in no rush to have my life changed in such a dramatic way. I want to travel the world with nothing more than a backpack and a cookbook. How can I have a child in such circumstances?

I might have to accept that I’ll never be a father. I’ve made peace with that when I decided to leave Floresfada. My parents can say whatever they want, but they have lots of other children to conform to their expectations. I don’t need to have that argument with them. Again.

But despite my mixed feelings about parenthood, I have to say the baby is absolutely adorable. Jurandir and Nelma are calling the child Neo for now. Neo is too small to do anything interesting, but they surely are cute while (not?) doing so. Jurandir even drafted me into baby-sitting duty so he and Nelma could have some alone time. It's quite unfortunate they haven't found other lovers yet to help with the childcare. At this point I'm starting to wonder if they actually want other lovers? Do they really plan to raise a whole family on their own? It's almost as subversive as my decision to not have children!

So I have a whole week ahead of me to be spent defending my life decision from my parents and baby-sitting the cutest fairy in Floresfada. I suppose it could be worse...?

Bye, book!

Morumpi

~*~

12 November 1978

Hey, book!

Jurandir wrote and sent me photos of Neo. It seems Nelma is well on track to becoming the next High Priestess, though they don't have a date for the election yet. How amazing would it be if she got it? She's only 21, has only one child and one partner... that's not what I picture when I think of "High Priestess of Pindaiba", though it could be because the current High Priest has got more partners that I have siblings and seems to get pregnant once a year. I don't remember ever seeing him not pregnant?

As always, my life is nowhere near interesting enough to write about. Maybe after I start going around the world I'll have more stories.

Bye for now, book.

Morumpi

~*~

31 December 1978

Hey, book!

I'm in Pindaiba again for New Year (and for Jurandir and Nelma's anniversary). Apparently this New Year ceremony will be the last one officiated by our current High Priest. He's decided he's definitely going to retire now that his first born is having a child of her own (that, or he's getting too old to give birth every year and his own commitment to his job is getting to him. I'm not usually in favour of people retiring at age 40, but in this case I'm happy to make an exception).

Neo is still cute, and now seems to be pretty smart too. Still no sings of a personality, though I suppose it takes more than half a year for babies to become individuals.

This morning we left Neo with Jurandir's parents and went on a little private celebration. I thought Jurandir and Nelma would've wanted to be on their own for their anniversary, but they decided to include me in it because we're so rarely together nowadays. It's good to know your best friends still appreciate and value you despite the geographical distance.

It many not have been the most mature thing to do (and it should never be an example for Neo), but our celebration consisted of playing pranks on the unsuspecting Grand Temple Acolytes. We were careful to only prank those Acolytes who had known us as children and who would thus take the whole thing in good humour. We can't risk Nelma's career now that she's so close to rising to the top.

We went into the forest afterwards. Jurandir built us a bed on the tree tops and we laid there for hours looking up at the sky, listening to the birds and the monkeys and maybe a jaguar in the distance, and talking about our lives and our past and how much we mean for each other. I didn't expect them to involve me in a conversation that was so obviously meaning for their anniversary, but they talked about me a lot, and I ended up talking about them too.

I told them how I look up to Jurandir as if he was my older brother, even though he's technically younger than me. How I marvel at his ability to build a bed on the tree tops like it's no big deal when I still struggle to even tie basic knots together. How he's more selfless and committed than I could ever be. How he's going to be a great father for Neo and however many children he has after that.

And then, once I started crying because I realised I missed him so much, I marvelled at how easily he made me feel better about myself. He said he looked up to me too, he missed me just as much, but he understood my life was mine to live, and I would be miserable if I had been forced to stay in Pindaiba. I ended up between him and Nelma, crying my eyes out as I hugged him to get as much physical as well as emotional support from him.

What did I do to deserve someone like Jurandir? To have someone in my family who understands, who doesn't judge my choices, whose presence feels just as wise and compassionate as that of our own Mother Deity?

(I hope Mother Deity doesn't take this as blasphemy. It was a comment meant with the best intentions.)

I left after that to spend some time with Neo. Jurandir and Nelma should have some time to themselves on their anniversary...

Uncle Maringela and Aunt Teca (Jurandir's parents, in case the context is not clear) weren't all that happy to share Neo with me. They said I shouldn't get Neo attached to me if I wasn't going to be around to see the baby growing up. Neo wouldn't consider me family the way my siblings would be family. They told me everything my parents had already been saying about my decision to leave "the only place worthy of a fairy" to go on "silly adventures". And they topped it off with a "we don't want you planting poisonous seeds in our grandchild's mind" speech about how I would be a horrible influence on baby Neo if I tried to keep in touch.

The worst part is that I know they're sort of right. Those thoughts are always waiting to resurface from the back of my mind. Can I really be considered family when I'm voluntarily walking away from them? When I've decided not to be there to help when things get tough? Can I keep coming back for the holidays as if nothing has happened and reclaim a place I'm no longer worthy of?

I would head back to Daisen today if I didn't want to upset Jurandir and Nelma even more. I know they don't mind seeing me just a few times a year, and that they understand my decision to leave. But they're the only ones. My parents, my siblings, my aunts and uncles and other cousins and grandparents would rather I settle for the boredom of Pindaiba or cut myself loose once and for all.

Tomorrow it is, then.

Bye, book.

Morumpi

~*~

12 January 1979

Hi book

I left Pindaiba almost as soon as the New Year ceremony was over. I couldn't look at my family in the eye again, so I just said goodbye to Jurandir, Nelma, and baby Neo. They promised we would keep writing to each other. I didn't have the heart to tell them about my decision to never set foot in Pindaiba or Floresfada again.

Did I do the right thing? 12 days on and I'm still not sure.

Bye for now.

Morumpi

~*~

28 February 1979

Hi book

Jurandir is already asking when my next break at university is. What should I tell him?

~*~

3 March 1979

Hi book

I still don't know what to tell him. The next Family Week is starting soon, but I'm not going to spend it with my family.

I want to see him again, though. And Nelma. And Neo.

The baby's first birthday is coming and I won't be there for it.

Mother Deity help me.

~*~

5 March 1979

Hi book

I told him the truth. What his parents told me, what my parents told me, what everybody else has been saying. I guess he will understand?

I don't think it ever hurt so much to write a single letter.

~*~

12 March 1979

Hi book

Jurandir's answer came today. After everything I told him, all he had to say was:

"I understand".

No signature, no greeting, no date. Just a piece of paper with those two words on.

Thanks, cousin. I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't this.

~*~

15 March 1979

Hi book

I got another letter from Jurandir. It's a proper letter this time, taking over 3 sheets of paper in that neat handwriting of his. I'm not going to copy the whole thing, but I want to register some bits in here.

"I'm sorry for the short reply. I can't be eloquent when I'm angry, but I wanted to get something to you right away. I hope this did not rub you the wrong way."

"The next thing I did after writing to you was paying a visit to Aunt Nespeira and Uncle Pereti. I was just as angry, but at least I managed to tell your parents to lick skunks with actual words instead resorting to the literal meaning of the phrase. They were not pleased. An argument ensued. And now they're not allowed to see Neo until they get their priorities straight."

"My parents apologised to me for what they said to you. Which doesn't mean much. The one they owe the apology to is you."

"Your siblings seem to be under the impression that moving to Daisen is the same as giving yourself over to demons. My attempts at correcting that assumption have so far seen mixed results. Maybe send a photo of Enkyo with your next letter, so they can see it looks nothing like a demon fortress."

"We definitely want you to be an influence in Neo's life. We need more people like you who are not afraid to have their own minds and are not afraid to follow their dreams. I want Neo growing up knowing that there is more to life than the safe confines of Floresfada, and that being a fairy is not just about praising nature and having children."

"Nelma and I should have been more explicit about how much we admire your decision and are proud of the life you're living. Go follow your dreams, but please don't stop being a part of our lives."

Mother Deity, why did you bless me with such an amazing person in my family? What do you expect me to do to make up for it? Right now I think nothing I'll ever do will be enough to make me worthy of this blessing.

~*~

4 April 1979

Hi book

Today is Nelma's birthday and she's celebrating by becoming the High Priestess of Pindaiba (Jurandir told me about it in his previous letter. She was chosen unanimously in the election, and they decided to do the official ceremony in her birthday because why not?). I wish I could be there with her, but since I cannot, I'm sending her my blessings and well-wishes in other ways.

It's funny how I've grown used to writing in this book. I found it weird at first, but now as soon as anything happens in my life, the first thing I think about is how I should write about it in the book. It's been hard to not write every day. I think I only manage because my life really is that boring, and there's only so many times I can write "went to class, learned a new recipe, hang out with friends and lovers afterwards".

Congratulations, Nelma! I'll make sure to see you, Jurandir and Neo as soon as I can!

~*~

13 April 1979

Hi book

I got a letter from my parents today. They want me to tell Jurandir to let them see Neo, even though they have no plans to apologise to me.

I'll write to Jurandir all right. But it'll be to show him the letter.

~*~

15 April 1979

Hi book

It's now my siblings' turn to have a go at me. They're calling me inconsiderate for running away from my family obligations. As if they even need me? There are 10 of them and 1 of me. Surely I'm not that essential?

I'm going to pass on their message to Jurandir too. And I'll make sure to thank him for giving me the confidence to keep going despite all of this.

Also, it's now less than a month for my birthday. I have a feeling a few family members will accidentally forget about it...

~*~

20 April 1979

Hi book

Look at me not being able to sleep because I haven't written here for almost a week. I'm telling myself that I'm nervous because I haven't heard from Jurandir or my parents yet, but I think we both know that's not the real reason.

And since when do I speak with you like you're a person?

I do feel better now at least. But this can't be a good thing. What are you, really?

Or rather... who are you?

~*~

30th April 1979

Hi book

I can't believe I lasted 10 days without writing. It took a lot of effort on my part. I spent the whole of last week thinking I should write about my classes, or just copy some recipes here.

But no. I'm writing today because I finally got word from Jurandir. He tried again to speak to my parents and my siblings. Somehow he convinced them to talk to me in person when I visit for my birthday. We'll have a civilised, adult conversation about the future, my plans, and why they should just let me live my life. Jurandir offered to be there for moral support along with Nelma.

Jurandir has this gift for making people agree with him that I've never had. I've always been the weird one with the wacky ideas and dubious sense of humour. I'm sure I would've had a lot more trouble in my childhood if he wasn't around to convince people to let me off the hook.

But still, why does it have to be so difficult? The other fairies in my class don't seem to have that problem with their families. I tried to talk to some of them after our intimate moments, but they didn't have a clue what I was talking about. I guess I'm just that lucky.

I have two weeks to think about what I'm going to say to my family. But I've already said everything and then some, why would this time be any different?

~*~

14 May 1979

Hi book

I'm 22 now. And I'm in Pindaiba to "celebrate".

I'm staying with Jurandir and Nelma. At least I get to spend time with baby Neo this way, which is not something my parents are currently not allowed to do.

We had the talk. I said all the things I had already told them. They were not impressed.

But Jurandir stepped in to the rescue. He argued that our Mother Deity had already blessed them with so many children that their way to return the blessing would be to let those children live the most fulfilling lives possible (I have a feeling Nelma might have helped him with this argument). It wasn't that different from what I was saying, but I guess the use of specific words combined with his no nonsense type of attitude did the trick. My parents said they would do better and try to accept my decision.

Then why are they still not allowed near Neo, you may ask?

Because by "accepting my decision" they really meant "if you're not doing anything for us, we're not doing anything for you either." I can't stay at their place when I visit, they won't bother to give me gifts on special occasions, and they made no promise about being at my wedding (not that I'm planning one?). That's not good enough for Jurandir, but he figured we'll have to win them over with time.

~*~

6 June 1979

Hi book

I've been getting letters from Jurandir and Nelma almost every day since I came back to Enkyo. They keep me updated about Neo (the baby seems to already like the colour pink more than the others, so Nelma has been doing some decorating in Neo's room), Nelma tells me about her garden and about the gossip around the Grand Temple, and Jurandir feels like he has to take care of me while my parents are removing themselves from my life.

Only, he does that by asking if I remembered to brush my teeth, if I'm wearing adequate clothing for the Daisenian dry-with-no-vegetation-to-make-things-nicer weather, and if I'm eating all of my green vegetables. He's sending me green vegetables (from Nelma's garden) because he knows how expensive those are around here.

At least I know he writes those things in good humour, and he doesn't mean them literally (save maybe the eat-your-vegetables part). He knows how to make me laugh, and I appreciate the jokes right now.

Because, you see (why I am referring to you like you're a person again?), the not-nice part of my family has thought of another way to brig me back to Floresfada: they've spread gossip about me to other families around Pindaiba and beyond, including the families of the fairies who are currently my classmates (and lovers). They're telling everyone who wants to hear (and plenty who don't) about how I'm ungrateful, unreliable, and don't really care about my family. They say I don't like commitment, that I'll run away from anyone I get close to as soon as I get the chance, that people should never trust me.

Of course, the gossip has reached my lovers. I thought I had always made it clear that we were only having casual fun. We are the only fairies around (and thus the only people who seem to have no problem with the idea of "casual fun"), so obviously they're the ones I would seek for those things. I've also never hidden from them my plans post-graduation.

But guess what? They still believed the gossip! I got told that this "new information" explained a lot about the weird way I acted around them (I don't know what they mean) and that they weren't willing to risk me being a thorn in their rose, so they became the thorn in my rose instead.

Fine. If they don't want me to have friends, then I'll get through the next 3.5 years without any friends. If they think that's going to make me give up, it's only made me more certain that I have to carry on.

~*~

15 July 1979

Hi book

Sorry for the long absence. My roommate (one of the fairies who's no longer my friend) took to hiding my stuff for her amusement. It took me this long to find you again.

As soon as I find my bank card and house keys I'll find another place to live. Preferably one with no fairies or gastronomy students in it.

~*~

19 July 1979

Hi book

Neo is 1 year old today!

Jurandir picked me up from my new flat yesterday and we travelled all the way to his much nicer home in Pindaiba so I could be here for the party. I still don't want to settle here permanently, but I have admit that fairies know how to build the bets houses. I'm sharing my new home with a shape-shifter (good for my language skills) and three dwarves who do nothing but party all day and eat whatever they can find in the fridge. I'm considering buying a small fridge for my bedroom (with a lock) to make sure I can eat my own food when I'm hungry. All four of my new flatmates study Law and are always going about how their course is hard and they need someone to make their life easy at home.

I'm sure they only welcomed me in their life because I can cook.

And they also think gastronomy is a ridiculous course that is a waste of the university's money (funny how they don't say that when they gobble on the stuff I cook for them). They make fun of me for it. I think they might be hoping I'll quit my degree and become their maid.

But theirs was the only flat that was accepting someone new right before the mid-year break, so what other option did I have?

Anyway, enough of this mess. Neo's birthday is a happy occasion!

(Also that's 1 year since I found this book and started writing on it. I guess that needs a celebration of its own.)

Neo is growing up so fast! It's making me almost wish I had a child of my own (please, Mother Deity, never let my parents read this!). The baby sits and babbles and smiles and can already put a few sentences together. I got a "I love you" followed by a wet kiss on the cheek. Absolutely adorable!

It's party time now. Jurandir's parents are much nicer to me than my own parents, so we don't have trouble hanging around them, and Nelma's family has politely refrained from getting involved in my family's trouble (I'm guessing Jurandir would've told them off if they tried?), so we are all on good terms.

Happy Birthday, Neo! For many years to come!

~*~

3 August 1979

Hi book

I'm back for the beginning of the second semester.

It was so much easier to overlook my need to write here when my daily life was boring, but now...

My flatmates are horrible. I could complain to Jurandir, but what will he do? Leave wife and child behind to come defend me at the slightest sign of trouble? (I'm sure he would, actually. And that's part of the problem.) I'm just going to have to hope I'll find something better now that I'm not in such a hurry to leave the fairies behind. Without my parents' help I can't afford any luxuries, but I know the Daisenian government has some policies to help migrant students afford life in the capital. Maybe it includes a basic flat? Or accommodation at the university itself?

I was under the impression my flatmates took me for a maid. I'm now sure that's exactly what they think of me. They say I have an easy life compared to them, so I have to be the one taking care of the flat while they go out partying to "unwind". At least when they're out partying they're not breaking down the house. They also seem under the impression that all fairies are wired to clean up their environments and keep everything nice and fresh. Where did they get that idea from? Whichever the case, they've made it clear that if I refuse to do what they ask me, they'll kick me out. So now, between university work, house work, and finding-another-flat work, I may have to give up some luxuries in life such as sleep for the semester.

~*~

10 September 1979

Hi book

I swear I tried to write. Please don't be mad at me (not that you can. You're a book. Also, you're a book. I have to stop writing like I'm talking to you directly). But I've been so tired I can't bring myself to pull you out from the hiding place under the bed (I learned my lesson about leaving my things out in the open). I spent this last month on maybe 3 hours of sleep a night. When I'm not busy with work and I think I can sleep for longer, my dear housemates decide it's party time and get extremely noisy right next to my room. Then they take me out of bed when they're done so that I can "satisfy my urges" to clean it up for them.

I promise I'll do better in the future. I'm going to visit Jurandir at the next Family Week and I'll tell him about all of this. He'll have the brainpower to help me look for another place to live or to find out how to get the government help. Because right now I struggle to keep awake in class and I almost set the stove on fire last time I tried to cook.

~*~

8 October 1979

Hi book

Jurandir saved me again!

As soon as he heard what my flatmates were doing, he came back with me to sort it out. He had one of his frank-yet-intimidating conversations with my flatmates. He massacred their misconceptions about fairies with his harsh words and their inability to intimidate him into submission (like they did with me). Jurandir doesn't care that the shape-shifter can become twice his size and threatened to split his face in two. He shrugged off the dwarves' promise to bury him alive. And once he was sure he gained their respect, he helped me pack my stuff and got us a hotel room. He's going to be staying with me until he can be sure I'm in a safer place.

It's still Family Week. I'm sorry I'm taking Jurandir away from his family for the occasion, but at least he's my family too.

~*~

16 October 1979

Hi book

I've found a much better place now. It's a tiny studio flat, but it's all mine, and it's only a few minutes walk from the university campus. I have applied for the government help, but it can take up to three months to hear back from them. Jurandir promised to help me pay the rent until then (apparently the High Priestess earns enough money and on-job benefits that they have plenty to spare), so things are finally looking up.

Before anything else, though, I have some 3 months of sleep to catch up to.

~*~

24 October 1979

Hi book

Nelma just called. There was a demon raid in Pindaiba. Jurandir and my siblings were taken, among many others. Nelma said she only escaped because she was inside the Grand Temple. The next thing she knew, everyone was gone and half the city was destroyed.

She is reaching out to anyone who can help to figure out where the hostages will end up. I have to do it too. Maybe Daisen can send specialised investigators?

Though even as I write, I know nothing will come of it. Demon raids have happened before, and fairies are notoriously defenceless against them. What do demons even want with us? We lose our special abilities if we kill, so we are useless in their wars. Are demons suddenly interested in gardening, but too ashamed to ask for help in figuring out nature? I wish...

Wherever he is, I hope Jurandir is safe. I hope this time we beat the odds and find him before he becomes cannon fodder for some entitled demon brat.

Please, Mother Deity, don't let more of your children disappear like this.

~*~

30 October 1979

Hi book

Still no news of Jurandir, which means he's likely lost forever now. Even if he's still alive, the demons who took him should be long gone from this continent by now, and we'll never catch them.

Why? Why him of all people? Why is Mother Deity letting them take away the only family I still have, the only person who looked out for me and for everyone he knew? What is going to happen to Neo now, growing up not knowing what an amazing person their father was? And what about Nelma?

Oh, Mother Deity, Nelma! She didn't deserve this! She was so happy, they hadn't even celebrated two years of marriage, didn't even have time to get more lovers! They had such pure, genuine love, and now her husband is as good as dead because some entitled skunk-lickers decided fairy lives are disposable, no more than toys for them to play with.

Jurandir did so much for me, and now that he really needs my help, all I'm doing is sit here ranting to a blank book!

THIS BLANK BOOK CAN HELP YOU

What is this? Who is this?

I CAN HELP YOU FIND YOUR FAMILY

You're a book. What kind of magic is this? Is this a demon book?

I CAN HELP YOU FIND YOUR FAMILY

Who are you?

I CAN HELP YOU FIND YOUR FAMILY

Is that all you're going to say? Fine. How can you help?

I CAN TELL YOU WHERE YOUR FAMILY IS

You can? Then why haven't you done that yet?

I CAN TELL YOU WHERE YOUR FAMILY IS

FOR A PRICE

Of course. I should've seen that coming.

Name your price. I'll see what I can do.

I AM FAIR IN MY PRICES. I RETURN SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO YOU, AND YOU GIVE ME SOMETHING OF EQUAL VALUE.

What do you want to bring Jurandir back to us?

HOW MUCH IS HE WORTH FOR YOU? IS HE NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN YOUR LIFE? WHAT ARE YOU PREPARED TO GIVE UP FOR HIS SAKE?

You're right. I have nothing as valuable as him. Is there anything you want from me that can make this work?

YOU

You want me?

A LIFE FOR A LIFE. A FAIRY FOR A FAIRY. SURRENDER YOUR LIFE TO ME, AND YOU WILL LEARN WHERE YOUR FAMILY IS

Does that mean you'll kill me? Or just take me to where Jurandir is so I can replace him?

SURRENDER YOUR LIFE TO ME, AND YOU WILL LEARN WHERE YOUR FAMILY IS

Will Jurandir be free if I do that? Will he be able to go back to Nelma and to see Neo growing up?

SURRENDER YOUR LIFE TO ME, AND YOU WILL LEARN WHERE YOUR FAMILY IS

Can't you give me a straight answer for once?

SURRENDER YOUR LIFE TO ME, AND YOU WILL LEARN WHERE YOUR FAMILY IS

I guess not. It probably means the answer is "no". This is a trick.

BUT IT IS STILL THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN LEARN WHERE YOUR FAMILY IS

What is going to happen to me if I agree?

YOU WILL BE MINE

But what does that mean?

YOU WILL BELONG TO ME

Another non-answer! I'm just wasting time with your tricks! For all I know, Jurandir is already dead!

HE IS NOT. HE IS A MOST INTERESTING FAIRY. EVERYTHING YOU SPOKE ABOUT HIM HAS ALREADY PROVEN TO BE TRUE. HE SHALL REMAIN UNHARMED AS LONG AS YOU AGREE TO MY TERMS

You have him, then? You know who he is because of me?

HE WAS THE TARGET OF THE RAID. YOU DID WELL IN HANDING US SUCH A POWERFUL TOOL

So it's all my fault? I'm the reason Nelma lost her husband and Neo won't have a father?

YES. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR DESTROYING THE LIVES OF THOSE YOU LOVE THE MOST. CONGRATULATIONS!

BUT I AM GENEROUS TO THOSE WHO HELP ME. I GIVE YOU THE CHANCE TO CHANGE THEIR DESTINY

Will you really let Jurandir go if I let you take me instead?

A LIFE FOR A LIFE

And what do you need from me to make this happen?

A DROP OF BLOOD

A DROP OF YOUR BLOOD ON THE PAGE WILL SEAL OUR CONTRACT

And where is the fine print?

IF YOU CARE ABOUT THE FINE PRINT, YOU DO NOT CARE ENOUGH ABOUT YOUR FAMILY

I'm sure this is a trick. I can feel you'll not let Jurandir walk free so easily. And I still don't know what it means to give myself to you.

But it's still the closest we've ever been to finding him. Even the tiny chance of this being not just a trick is still better than having no chance at all.

And if it's my fault he was targeted, then it's my responsibility to bring him back. He's done so much for me, it's time to return the favour.

I'm sorry, Nelma. I'm sorry, Neo. I don't know if what I'm doing is right, but I'm doing what I can. For you.

A life for a life, demon. You'll have my blood, but I'll make sure they get Jurandir back, even if it is the last thing I do.

A LIFE FOR A LIFE IT IS

DO YOU ACCEPT MY TERMS?

I do.

THEN IT SHALL BE DONE