Life Goes On - 34. Sweet Sixteen

1977

Sean Keith Kowalski (age 13) asks his Dad (Tom) why his and PT’s penises were different (uncut). His father replies, “You and I are fortunate. Being cut is call circumcision. Some religions, Jewish and Muslim, require the circumcision of all boys. While the custom is almost universal for boys in the USA, in Europe it is rarely done except for religious reasons. My parents are Polish and in Poland practically no one is ‘cut’. Therefore my parents told the doctor not to cut me. When at the swimming hole you might have noticed Father Sean is also uncut. His father was Irish who insisted that his son be kept natural. Actually we are lucky as I am told that uncut men have increased sensitivity. Why is this important? Well, at your age I think it is time for us to have the father / son talk.” Tom continued with the ‘sex talk’. At the conclusion he explained that the boys in the locker room who sometimes made fun of his natural dick would someday be jealous when they learned they could have better sex with an uncut penis. The skin covering the head protects it making it more sensitive. He then told Sean he had the choice of getting it cut after he turned eighteen. It was his choice but he strongly recommended keeping his skin. He then explained that sometimes the skin was too tight and it had to be removed for medical reasons. This was a rare situation and he assumed the pediatrician would have recommended it if Sean had this rare condition. He asked Sean if he had any difficulty pulling the skin back and then up over the head. During the ‘sex talk’ he had discussed masturbation with his son as something that was natural and a needed relief until marriage. Since Tom had told his son he jerked off when he was his age Sean felt relieved and was willing to answer his father’s question. He assured his father that the skin rode back and forth with ease. Tom then repeated, “The boys in his gym class are jealous because you have something they can never have.”

………….

1978

PT and his father had had an interesting discussion about his future. His father supported his desire to be a farmer while encouraging him to be the best farmer possible. Peter, an engineering professor at Ohio State, had arranged for his fourteen year old son to have a tour of Ohio State University’s College of Agriculture. Young PT was fascinated by the facilities including labs, barns and experimental resources. Having parents who were both university professors he without being pushed by them understood the value of education. He believed that if he attended Ohio State he could become a great farmer. While his best friend David, the person he hoped to own a farm with someday, shared the passion for farming he did not share his enthusiasm for education.

Since quality education required writing his father suggested he teach himself to use a typewriter. His parents let him use the typewriter in their home office. Both his parents used the office as well as his Aunt Ann (unknown to him his mother’s lover) and occasionally Uncle Tom (unknown to him his father’s lover). Since Aunt Ann and Uncle Tom lived in the house next door the two families had almost blended as one.

One afternoon while working in the home office PT needed to refill the stapler. Searching for a box of staples he found a key hidden in the back of one of the drawers. Being inquisitive he inserted the key and discovered it unlocked the one locked desk drawer. Of course a fourteen year old is going to investigate this opportunity. What he found shocked him, pleased him and eventually gave him hours of enjoyable ‘hands on me time’. PT had found a portion of the male porn collection that Uncle Tom had inherited from his friend, Keith. On his next trip to the farm he took some with him to share with David. The boys had been inseparable since being toddlers and slept naked together whenever possible. They had learned to jerk off together. The sucking and fucking portrayed in these magazines was unbelievably erotic and interesting. They experimented sucking and were soon also shooting on each other’s faces. They saw photos of men licking the cum off of each other and eventually enjoyed this activity. While the sight of fucking was interesting they were afraid to try it, YET.

…………………………….

Summer 1979

One evening during one of PT’s many visits to the farm he and Uncle Will were watching a rerun of the TV series ‘Soap’. David had gone to the funeral of a relative with his family. This popular TV series was a parody on ‘soap operas’ (Daily daytime radio and then TV shows popular with stay at home women. They were called soap operas as originally when on radio the sponsors were usually soap companies.) One of the characters of this popular show was named Jodie Dallas played by Billy Crystal. He played the part of an openly gay man who was dating a closeted football player. This was one of the first (if not the first) portrayals of a gay character in a regular role on prime time TV. Will noticed that the usually animated PT was quiet during and after the show. Jokingly he said, “A penny for your thoughts.”

PT, as if in a daze, looked at his great uncle and after a period of contemplation said, “I think I am different.”

Will replied, “We are all different. No two humans, animals or even plants are exactly the same.”

“I am different than all the boys in my class.”

Will suspected where this conversation was going. He knew PT and David had been close all their lives and when possible did everything together, including sleeping in the same bed.

“All the boys in my class and at Young Peoples’ Fellowship at church talk about girls. They talk about kissing, how big their tits are and everything about their bodies. When Joe on the track team boasted that he had gotten a handful of bare tit on a recent date Al, the oldest boy in our group, a senior, laughed. Is that all you did? Last week I was watching TV at Betty’s house in the basement recreation room. When I slid my hand under her blouse and brassiere she did not resist. So I moved it down and put it on her knee. Slowly I moved it up. She did not stop me. Since she was wearing a skirt I could easily move all the way up. When I touched her panties she did not resist. I rubbed where the panties covered her cunt. Then I slipped my hand under the panties and touched it. She moaned. I then rubbed it and she leaned in and kissed me. By now my bone was getting so hard I thought I would shoot in my pants. I opened my pants and pulled it out. When I placed her hand on my hard dick she wrapped her fingers around it. I put my hand over her hand and helped her stroke me. My other hand was on her pussy. As I shot a load onto the floor her mother called down asking if we wanted some popcorn. We were afraid she was going to bring it down so Betty quickly went upstairs for the popcorn while I cleaned up my spunk. Unfortunately when she returned her little brother came with her. We have a date next week. I am going to be prepared for the final act. I bought some rubbers from the machine in the Texaco gas station men’s room.”

“All the guys were enthralled with the story and want to hear what happens next. I am different. I have no interest in tits or pussies.”

“Uncle Will, why does everyone think you need a girl to be happy. You seem different. You never got married and you are very happy. Of all the old men I know you are the happiest.”

Will replied, “While I never felt a need for a girl to make me happy I did have friends that were men. One man that I met when I was in my twenties became a very special friend. JB whose real name was Jerry Bob and I were together for thirty-five years. He was the most important person in my life and I think of him every day. He died in my arms after a long illness fifteen years ago. Your father and his Russian friend, Vlad a professor at Western Reserve University, introduced me to Reg. While Reg will never replace JB he has been a very special friend and I am thankful we met.”

Will continued, “What does your friend David think of girls?”

“He is like me. We prefer to be together. When we do stuff with girls in school projects and at Church youth fellowship we have no special feelings.”

Will then said, “I have a very strange question to ask you. You may just say ‘I don’t remember’ if you do not want to answer. When you told me the story about Al getting the girl to touch him and then shooting on the floor, did you think more about his penis shooting or his hand on her pussy?”

“Uncle Will, if you were anyone else I would say ‘I don’t remember.’ I will tell you that I got hard at the thought of Al’s shooting. One of the other boys saw the bulge in my pants and after pointing it out they all laughed as he said, ‘you sure wish your hand was in her panties’. He then grabbed his own bulge and rubbed his hand on it. I laughed with them to cover my embarrassment and shame that I was really thinking of Al’s boner.”

Will continued, “I have one more question. I assume that at your age of fifteen you take care of yourself with your hand. I don’t know what you call this but I call it masturbation, the medical term, or jerking off or wanking the more common terms. When you do this, like I did at your age, do you think of boys or girls?”

Without hesitation PT replied, “Boys of course.”

“Then I would say you are like me. There are many names for men like us. The technical term is ‘homosexual’ while the OK expression is ‘gay’. Some other expression that are not so nice are ‘fairy’ and ‘queen’. Why are we gay? I do not know. It was not something I was taught. Your grandfather and I grew up in the same house with all the same activities. He is not gay, I am. Why? When I was a teenager sixty years ago there was no way to identify with being gay. A story such as we saw on the TV tonight was unthinkable. Such thoughts did not exist. I was totally confused. My father, your great, great-grandfather, and my brother, your great-grandfather, constantly question my ability to be a real man. Once I made the mistake of getting friendly with another boy. He told everyone I was a pervert. After that the remainder of my high school time was the darkest period of my life as I was shunned by many. The day I graduated from high school I enlisted in the military. When I completed my service I moved far away eventually ending up down south 1,000 (1,600 km) miles from Ohio. I rarely saw my family again. When I met JB my outlook on life totally changed and I became a happy fulfilled young man. He saved my life in addition to being a wonderful friend and someone I shared everything with. When I visited my family in Ohio I was rejected by most. Your great-grandfather tried to keep me away from the rest of the family. The only close relative that treated me with dignity was my niece, your grandmother. When I did visit north I began staying with your grandparents. I got to know your father and his brother Ronnie. The summer after his high school graduation your father visited me in Georgia. I was planning to sell my home and needed help cleaning and packing. He met my JB who then lived about an hour away. Your father fully understood my situation and accepted it as normal. You as a gay boy are extremely lucky that you have an open minded father.”

“Now my gay friend, I will try to answer any questions or concerns you have. However, we must be careful in our actions. If I did with you what you and David do I could be arrested since you are under age. You can ask anything, but no demonstrations.”

PT jumped out of his chair and went to his seated uncle. He wrapped his arms around the old man while almost crying said, “Uncle Will, you are the greatest.”

Will replied, “It felt good to have you wrap your arms around me. But since you are still technically a child please no more. As I said, if someone were to be looking in the window and saw us embrace I could be in serious trouble. Hold off your hugging until you are eighteen and legal.”

“I am sure it was difficult for you to initiate this discussion with me. In 1910 when I was your age I was keeping my feelings hidden. No friends like David. No one to talk to. No books with information. I was just a totally conflicted boy. I’m glad that you felt you could confide in me. I suggest you discuss your feelings with your father. But, be careful about who else you tell. I would suggest that David not discuss this with his father. Also, while ministers should be men who can give you guidance I am not sure all would accept you as you are. The minister at David’s small country church may not accept your and David’s feelings. In fact I have heard instances where boys have told their pastor about their feelings to have the pastor report his sinful ways to his parents. In fact I know of a boy here in Seville who at the age of thirteen was discovered to be different. His father told him to leave the house and never return. Luckily he had an aunt and uncle who were willing to take him in. Not all boys have been that lucky. In fact, before you confide in anyone other than our father I strongly suggest you talk to me first.”

When Will stood PT went to him and again embraced his uncle. “Thank you Uncle Will. I will never again show this kind of affection but tonight I just want to hold you. It feels so good.”

When David returned after 10 pm (22.00) Will had already gone to bed. They talked in bed until after midnight about PT’s conversation with his uncle. Actually it was not all talk as each found time to suck the other dry. They were so elated from the events of the evening that getting up at 6.00 to milk the cows was not considered a chore but an opportunity to be together.

When they returned from milking David went to Uncle Will who was preparing their breakfast and wrapped his arms around their elder friend. “PT and I had a long talk last night and I know I am not supposed to do this and I know the reason why. But just this once I want to thank you for being here when we needed you.” He kissed Uncle Will on the cheek. As he returned to the table his father, Paul, walked in. Both boys suddenly realized why there should be no signs of affection with Uncle Will. Had David’s father walked in a minute sooner he would have caught his son hugging and kissing Uncle Will. What would the father’s reaction be? No one knew and no one wanted to find out.

“Good morning. You all look happy this sunny morning. Are you boys ready to help me mend the fences?”

With a twinkle in his eye David replied, “We are hot and ready for anything!”

A few weeks later PT was at home in Columbus asked his father. “Dad, could we go for a walk along the Olentangy River near the campus. I would like to check out the university experimental farm fields”.

As they walked on a path along the river PT got up the courage to speak. “I’m gay. I know I am because I had a long talk with Uncle Will and he agreed that like himself I am also gay.”

Peter put his around his son. “I am happy that you accept yourself for who you are. You’re mother and I have suspected this for years. We have researched it and agree that you most likely are. So be it. That is how you were created. We believe it is not a choice but what God planned for you at birth. With the attitudes society in general has about this I suggest you keep it to yourself. Hopefully someday in the future you will be not have a need to hide it, but not now in 1979. This changes absolutely nothing about how I or your mother feel about you. We love you, we support you.”

That evening Peter discussed PT’s ‘coming out’ with both his lover, Tom, and wife, Louise. The four parents and pairs of lovers had years earlier decided they would come out to their children when the youngest turned eighteen. Peter was of the opinion that they should come out to PT now and ask him to ‘keep their secret’ for three years when he and his twin sister, Louise, turned eighteen. Tom discussed it with his wife, Ann and Louise discussed it with her lover, Ann. They all agreed that PT should be told. It would greatly help his self-esteem to know that he and Uncle Will were not the only gay ones in the family.

That weekend Peter offered to drive his son to the farm. Friday afternoon as they drove north on I-71 Peter began. “A few days ago you shared news about yourself that was neither a surprise nor shocking. Today I will share something with you. In my senior year of high school I was one of those quiet, serious, studious students. I did not have a lot of friends and was content to be a loaner. I just did not seem to fit in. I played clarinet in the marching band that played at all football games. In the fall of 1955, my senior year, the team had an away game with Shaker Heights. We won thanks to the usual outstanding performance of the quarterback. The band bus returning home to Pleasant Valley left immediately after the game ended. The football team would take a later bus following a critique of the game by the coach and showers. Just before our bus pulled out the star quarterback jumped onto the bus. He had been given permission to take the earlier band bus as he needed to get home to take his parents to the airport. As he stepped onto the bus he looked around and saw me sitting alone in one of the front seats. He sat next to me. I was confused. The most popular boy in school was sitting next to me. He started talking. Soon we were discussing things that were private about our lives. He invited me to come to his home the next day when his parents would not be home. The excuse for my visit was to help him study for an algebra exam. The reason was that I and I assumed the quarterback wanted to continue our discussion. About a month later we heard rumors that the most popular girl in school, the head cheerleader, and a quiet studious girl were ‘good friends’. I spied on them one day and saw them kiss in the band room closet. My new friend and I asked the girls to meet us at a popular teenager hang out, the bowling alley. The girls, after much persuasion by my friend reluctantly agreed to meet. We sat with them at a table in the corner of the snack area sharing cokes and chips. We had a long conversation. In the noisy bowling alley no one suspected we were having a serious, possibly life changing conversation. We just appeared to be teenagers hanging out. My friend led the conversation. He told them how we felt about each other and stated we assumed they felt the same way about each other. He admitted that I had seen them kissing in the band room closet.”

“To make a long story short we suggested they go out with us to a school dance the following weekend. To everyone we would be just two girl/boy couples at a school dance. This would give each girl/girl and boy/boy couple an opportunity to be with each other. They asked us to leave the table while they discussed our offer. My friend and I played a pinball machine while waiting for a reply.”

“When we returned the cheerleader spoke for the two. She started, ‘You guys are insane, what you are proposing is the most outlandish plan we have ever heard. You want us to pretend to be hot for you when you are really hot for each other. No one in their right mind would agree to what you suggest’.”

We got a sick feeling. What if they gossiped about what we had told them about our feelings for each other. We had opened our hearts to these girls and now we were being called insane and out of their minds. To us the plan seemed logical. Angry with the situation, we just wanted to get up and run out of the place.”

“But then she continued. ‘Nevertheless we are also insane and probably out of our minds. And as you observed sneaky Peter, we are hot for each other. So let’s go to the dance and rock and roll. Come on boys, let’s get out of this dump’.”

“That was twenty-four years ago. The four of us have been inseparable since.”

“Dad, Did I just hear you right? Are you telling me you and Uncle Tom are a couple and mom and Aunt Ann are a couple?”

“You heard me correctly. In case you are wondering, there is one thing I want to make clear. Although Tom and I are not into girls as your mom and Ann are not into boys all of our children were conceived in the normal way. That said, no more questions about my sex life. I will not ask about your sex life and you won’t ask about mine. A lot of stuff happened back then that I did not share with my parents as I am sure you do not want to share all with me now or in the future.”

“I assume you and David are in some sort of relationship. If you are in a boy/boy gay relationship then I assume you will tell him what I have told you. Please do not tell anyone else. In fact I would not have come out to you if I did not think you will keep this private. Also I suggest that you urge David not to come out to his parents. Your mom, I, Aunt Ann and Uncle Tom agreed years ago to come out to our children when the last one turned eighteen and graduated from high school. We assumed by then you would be mature enough to understand our situation. When I discussed your coming out to me a few days ago we agreed that it would be best to keep to that plan with you being an exception. They did agree to my coming out to you. Since you trusted me to tell your story we felt we owned you our story. Do not discuss this with your sister or Sean or Louise. I of course will not mention this to anyone else. If you want to come out to others that is your decision. At this point I’m not sure I would advise it. Once you tell there is no taking it back. As far as Uncle Will is concerned he knows all about my life.”

“I will tell you one of my adventures. This happened in the summer of 1958 when I was twenty years old. Uncle Will lived in a small town in Georgia where he was a professor of art at a small college. He asked me to visit him for the summer to help him pack and get his house ready to sell. He planned to move to Athens to be with JB, his life-long friend. In addition to being an art professor he also gave private lessons. He had organized a class for a group of adults that were not college students at a location out of town. The subject of the class was drawing the nude male. He asked me and I volunteered to be the nude male model. I was reluctant for obvious reasons but he convinced me that I could professionally do it. One of the students in the class was Seth. He was the most talented in the group. With Uncle Will’s permission I invited him to the house to finish the drawing the following evening. Remember Seth, the red head friend of Henry? He died in an auto accident six years ago. Henry, my age, worked for Uncle Will doing yard work and odd jobs. He saw a potential in this young man and supported his college education financially. I suggested that Henry might also model for Seth. Let’s just say that their friendship began that evening. As soon as Henry got his degree they moved to Cleveland. They knew that two men living together in a small town would be difficult. More important they knew that in the south at that time a white man living with a black man could be dangerous. A big city offered privacy that a small town did not where everyone knows your business. That’s one story about my adventures. No more. By the way. That was the only time I ever modeled for an art class.”

The weekend was a relaxing success. The boys slept upstairs and Peter slept downstairs with Uncle Will. While there was no sexual activity Peter knew his eighty-four year old great-uncle and good friend would appreciate the comfort of a man in bed and the cuddling.

July 1980

Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Louise and PT
Happy birthday to you.

At the family birthday party PT shared with his twin sister he celebrated a significant age, sixteen. It was only days until he would get his driver’s license and then be able to visit the farm and most important David on his own schedule.

Two weeks later, having passed the driver’s test he drove to the farm with his father as a passenger. Peter wanted to observe PT’s driving the 100 mile (160 km), hour and half drive from home to the farm. PT and his father discussed the young man’s plans for the future. By now it was taken for granted, at least by Peter, that his son would someday own and operated a farm with David. During this time together while driving toward the farm Peter acknowledged his support for his son’s long term plans. Peter was happy that his son felt that to be the best farmer possible he needed a university degree in agriculture. PT planned to attend Ohio State University and hopefully participate in programs at Ohio State’s Agriculture Research Center in Wooster, about a half hour drive from the farm. Peter was satisfied that his son’s plans were realistic and plausible. PT knew David had no interest in higher education. Since his older brother planned to marry and work with his father on the farm it was assumed David would not be needed full time after high school graduation. If that was the situation he would hire himself out as a farm hand or find other employment until he and PT had their own farm after PT’s graduation from Ohio State.

Peter was pleased that his son was capable of driving the long distance and drove home after having lunch with Uncle Will. PT would remain on the farm the remainder of the summer and have the use of Uncle Will’s car.

Three months later PT was home. With a muscular tanned body honed from the hard farm labor he was a sexy sight to the girls in his class. More than one of his female classmates had pursued this handsome young man. However, his dick with happy memories of the nights and sometime adventures in the mornings and afternoons in the barn or out in the corn fields with David, was not aroused by the opportunities these girls may have been presenting. He had joined the track team and was surprised at how much he enjoyed watching his sweaty teammates perform. He enjoyed both watching the cute asses as they ran and banter in the shower. However, while he enjoyed looking he felt a commitment to David and never considered anything other than looking. Most weekends he borrowed one of the family cars and visited the farm. Between his frequent visits to the farm and his experienced fist his dick was blissfully taken care of.

One afternoon late in September when he arrived at after school track practice he was told it was cancelled. Arriving home two hours earlier than scheduled he planned to go to the privacy of his bedroom and have a hands on experience while looking at pictures of naked men in one of the magazines he now kept hidden. Over a year earlier he had found some of his father’s male porn collection inherited by Uncle Tom from Keith, his boss at Olentangy Insurance.

As he walked down the hall half boned up in anticipation he heard noises coming from his sister’s room. He was going to say ‘hi’ to her when he heard moans by Louise and someone else. He assumed she and her boyfriend of many years, Sean, the son of Uncle Tom and Aunt Ann were making out. The door was open a crack and he peered in. To say he was surprised would be an understatement. Both were naked and Sean was fucking his sister. She was on her back and he was thrusting in. PT’s half boned dick now grew to full mast. He reached into his pants and rubbed himself. As Sean continued his thrusts and his sister cried out in pleasure PT pulled his out and starting jacking. Suddenly Sean looked up and the two stared at each other. Peter backed away while Sean had his dick deeply implanted and he had his dick in his hand. PT retreated to his bedroom, closed the door tight and for a few minutes thought about what he had just witnessed. His sister was getting fucked and enjoying it. As he thought about it he almost laughed. Why wouldn’t his twin sister enjoy sex as much as he did? What he was doing with David was similar. Although they were not fucking yet (although they had examined pictures of guys fucking in the porn catch PT found) they were sucking and swallowing. As he thought of Sean’s dick his own deflated dick rose to the occasion and he soon had it in hand. While he had not seen Sean’s dick as he fucked they had jerked off together years earlier and he remembered an impressive cock considering their ages then. About half an hour later there was a knock on his door. He invited Sean in who had a look of terror on his face.

As Sean closed the door PT spoke. “I am sorry I spied on you. My track practice was cancelled and I came home early. Hearing noises in Louis’s room I peeked into the door that was not closed tight. Seeing what I saw was interesting, very interesting. I should have walked away. But what would you do if you saw two people fucking? Don’t worry. I am not going to tell anyone. I was not shocked, just surprised. If my sister and you are half as horny as I am all the time, I fully understand why you were doing ‘it’. From where I stood I could not see your dick. I hope you were wearing a rubber. Please, I do not want to be an uncle yet. As long as you use protection I have no problem with your loving. Just one extra warning. Do not flush rubbers down the toilet. Wrap them in a tissue and hide them in the bottom of a waste basket. Rubbers could mess up the plumbing and the air in them might cause them to float back up. I’m sure you don’t want one of our parents to walk into the bathroom and find a cum filled rubber floating in the toilet.”

“If my sister does not know I caught you it’s OK by me if you tell her. If you don’t want her to know that is also OK.”

Sean left the room relieved that his friend, Louise’s brother, was so understanding. He was also surprised that PT was an expert on the use of rubbers.

Author’s comment: Oh to be ‘Sweet Sixteen’.