Tales of the Underground: Blinded - 33. A Living Nightmare

I felt my heart begin to race as all the different outcomes ran across my mind. I saw my parents nervously look to me seeing what I’d say or do, but for whatever reason I couldn’t take my eyes off the screen…I just need to see the name…I need to know it was Owen, and not anyone else…I need to know.

Walter went to speak, but I ripped my phone out of my pocket and hit Carter’s contact before he could. Pick up, pick up...I nervously chanted to myself, not knowing what to expect. “You have reached the voicemail of…” I clicked off and quickly dialed again, hand beginning to shake more and more at the fear of who that teenager could be. Once more no answer, and I couldn’t help but tremble as my worst nightmare began to come true, finally after the 8^th call a groggy voice picked up “What?” he tiredly groaned “It’s 11 at night, I’m trying to sleep…if this is a you up kinda call, I swear…”I slowly walked into the nearby game room to escape my parents sight, as a tear fell from my eye. I couldn’t help but let out a broken up breath of relief as I heard his voice “Is this a prank?”

“No Carter” I exhaled, trying my best to form words “Just…thank god you’re safe.”

“Okay?” he groaned, clearly not having heard the news “Did you have a nightmare?”

“Yeah” I quickly lied “I guess I just needed to hear your voice.”

He let out a deep sigh, but I could tell he was smiling “Now I know how Aaron feels.”

“I love you, okay?” I confessed, not sure what my next few days would bring “No matter what I do, or say…I love you.”

“I love you too weirdo” he giggled, shrugging off the sudden display of emotion “Are you okay?”

“Yeah…I’m fine…I love you” I let out once more before clicking the phone shut. I took another few seconds to recompose myself before walking back into the living room “It’s Owen isn’t it?” I exhaled, taking a look at both my parents.

“Yes” Walter sighed, still looking as the report broke further and further “Riley, I know exactly what’s going through your mind right now, but you’re not the reason they have him.”

“He went to them hopin they’d come for me…I told him not too.” I explained, still in some sort of disbelief “Why couldn’t he just listen…why’d he have to be so angry?”

“Just because he made a mistake, doesn’t make it your fault.” Nancy supported, trying to force a smile “You can’t blame yourself for this.”

I shook my head, not buying a word of it as Aaron rushed down the stairs “Have you guys heard…” his words trailed off as he saw what was taking place “Cy please…Riley you don’t have…”

I threw up my hands cutting him off and shook my head “Would everyone just stop tellin me how I should feel?” I lashed out “Jus…let me go to bed”

“Alright” Walter exhaled, still keeping his eyes fixed on me “Aaron, you and your brother go to bed, in your room.”

“I wanna sleep in my own…”

“No” Walter boomed “And so help me god Riley, if you even try to leave this house tonight I will ship you off to military school faster than you even say the words army, you understand me?”

“Yeah” I muttered, looking down.

“Do you understand me?” he rumbled even louder.

“Yes” I groaned, finally looking up. In his eyes I saw a mix of anger, fear and frustration…he knew what I was planning, and worst of all he knew there was nothing he could do to stop me.

“The police will be here in the morning to talk with you about what they should do, just sit tight until then okay?” he pleaded “just sit tight.” I nodded, and ran upstairs, done with the conversation…done with seeing them for the night.

Aaron’s eyes stayed on me as we both got ready for bed. He was just as scared as his dad…if not more. Finally as he went to turn off the lights he looked over and stared me down “You’re going to leave tonight…and there’s nothing we can do to stop you.”

“I’ll be back” I grumbled turning away from him.

“You don’t know that…” he exhaled in a shaky voice “You have no idea what they’ll do to you, and you have no idea what you’re even going to do when you get there.”

“I know I’m going to raise hell” I confessed with determination “I know they’re not ready for what I’m going to bring…I know Cy Walker lives.”

“Please don’t do this” Aaron pleaded “That person you were…he’s gone…please!”

“Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.” I shook, still not looking at him “I’ll be back…if it comes down to my life…I’m running…but I gotta try…I gotta.” I heard him began to softly cry as he hit the lights, but I knew what I had to do “I love you” I let out. His cries only groaned on stronger as he grew too upset to respond. Finally when I was sure he had fallen asleep, I got changed into dark clothing, cracked the window, and slipped out and down the side of the house. I haven’t climbed in a few weeks, but it still came naturally to me…as though I was born to do it.

It didn’t take long for me to make it back to the Southside, an hour to the nearest train station, then just a matter of sneaking on and off public transport. I took a deep breath as I stood outside of my old hideout, the place that used to seem like home to me…how stupid I was back then…how foolish.

“Yo” I yelped, slamming open the door “You fuckers wanted me, well now you got me” I shouted, staring down the brothers inside. As a few of them stood up I slowly made my way to a nearby table, and snatched the handgun laying on it “Where’s Ro?”

“Why?” a familiar deep voice growled “You gonna shoot me?”

“No” I muttered, looking at him, and placing the gun in my waistband “better to get caught with one…” I droned on staring at him.

“And here we were thinkin you’ve softened up.” He laughed, staring deep into my eyes. He still stood like a monster above the ground below him, big, heavy…intimidating…but not to me…not anymore…he thinks he still has me under his abusive spell…but I know better than that now. “Don’t you prefer this one?” he laughed, pulling a blue handled glock from his side “Has your handey work on it afterall.”

“How’d you get that?” I spit, staring at the gun “Last I saw it, a badge had it.”

He took a few steps forward, but before I even had time to answer I felt the heavy plastic of the gun smack across my face “You know better than to ask questions” He reprimanded, throwing the gun down on me “And here…for your troubles” he laughed, throwing a police badge on top of it with me.

I slowly stood back up, and spit blood in his direction “So you killed Cooper?” I smiled “Think that’s supposed to scare me? You forget the shit I’ve seen…you forget who I am?”

“Who you were, and who you are now are two different people, isn’t that right Riley? And I know that right now you desperately want to be a hero” he mocked, keeping eye contact with me “I know you’re here to save your little friend, he said you don’t even like him…how pathetic.” Ro stomped heading towards a nearby room “Said that he could lead us to you…but that wouldn’t have worked. No, not with the money you ran with up there.” he shook “but what would’ve is giving Riley the chance to try and play hero, you asked if I’ve forgotten, but have you forgotten…forgotten how well I know you?” he grunted “I raised you, I know exactly what you’ll do and when you’ll do it, and sometimes you just can’t help but try and be the big man everyone will talk about.”

“Well now you have me.” I dared, still doing my best to seem intimidating “So let him go.”

“Why? So you can run?” he mocked, waiving me over to the small side room ”No…instead you’re going to prove you’re still one of us.” As I entered the room I saw Owen, tied up in a small chair, roughed up, but breathing. Ro pulled a knife out of his pocket and handed it to me “Prove your loyalty.”

“He can’t give us any information” I rejected “This is pointless.”

“The point is to prove you haven’t softened up” he growled, slamming me across the face once more, except this time with his fist “Now get to it, and don’t kill him…he’s still worth good money.”

Now I see his plan…he thinks if I carve him up…if I’m the one who disfigures him…well the Northside wouldn’t accept me again…but he underestimates the people I know up there…he doesn’t know that if I return with both of us alive…everything will be forgiven.

“You made me do this Owen.” I let out, taking the knife from Ro and walking towards him “I told you stay away, to leave shit be…but man you don’t listen.” I shook, lightly running the knife along his arm, not yet applying enough pressure to hurt him “I said you was gonna get hurt, but you think you know everythin…now I’m forced into teaching you a lesson you’ll wear for the rest of your life…listen to this one.” I reluctantly groaned, finally cutting into his skin.

The more I cut the harder and harder it got. The change in me…it stood firm against my old ways. I tried my best not to show weakness, but it was pouring out of me in spurts. A few times I had to take a step back, and stop myself from throwing up, or to shake off Owen’s cries. Believe me…as much as I hate Owen…I really didn’t want to be doing this…but right now it’s what I have to do to keep both of us alive, and hell, until I have a real plan…I’ll do what I need to.

I threw the bloody knife to the floor, finally doing enough damage to satisfy Ro, but the second the steel hit the floor I felt a crack begin against my face, before I knew it I was getting beat just like I did a year ago…I was back in gang life…back to being punished.

“You think you can just leave us?” Ro boomed, as his hits landed “You thought I was done with you? You jus as stupid as ever.” He shook “You try to leave me again and I’ll burn you alive…and if I see you around without Cooper’s badge…that’ll be it for you.” He commanded, slamming the door behind him.

“Why?” Owen weakly forced out, as he tried to breathe through his pain.

“I’m sorry” I sarcastically forced out, as blood dripped from my mouth “It was like he had a gun to my…”

“No” he stammered “Wh-why are you here?” He was doing his best to not scream out in pain, but I could tell I had really done a number on him…I could tell he was realizing that I was actually who I’ve said I was these past few months.

“Cause I had to” I exhaled through deep breaths “They woulda killed you if I didn.”

“My dad” he exhaled once more “My dad woulda..”

“They don care about the money right now” I interrupted, saving him the words “Money could only get them so far…they need me to teach someone how to run like I can…then they’ll kill me, and return you for money.”

“Then wh…whats the plan?” he forced out, looking down at me as our blood began to pool together.

I shook my head and looked up at the mess of a teen infront of me “I don have one right now,”

“Why di-didn’t you come without a plan?” He gulped, as he grew weaker and weaker.

I found the strength to stand up and stared at him “If I didn’t come tonight, they would’ve done 10x worse to you and put it up online…and it woulda kept goin until I came…trust me…I’m doin the best I can.”

“Don’t l-let me die…please” he begged, but passed out from pain before I could respond. I wish I could tell him I won’t…I wish I could tell him I would save him…but if I can’t come up with something soon…well I’m running…I’m doing what’s best for me.

That night I passed out in the corner I stayed in as a kid, a pool of pain and fatigue forcing me off into the night. I can’t say I slept well…if I even slept at all. I just know I was in and out of consciousness, until finally a young boy poked me awake.

“What?” I growled, looking at the small boy infront of me “What the hell do you want?” I grumbled as the pain from last night’s beating began to sink in.

“I uhm…Ro said you’re running my corner” he let out, taking a look at me “We need you so we can go sell…if we don’t sell Ro…”

“He’ll beat the shit out of you.” I nodded, forcing myself to my feet. “Let’s get to work” I grumbled, grabbing a blunt off the counter to ease the pain. The young boy led me to a nearby corner where 2 or 3 older teens stood. All staring at me…waiting for my okay “Well get the fuck to it.” I barked, leaning against the wall “If any of you try and steal from me...” I began, pulling up my shirt to show them my glock “Ro will be the least of your problems.” I could see the fear in their eyes as they looked at me. I’ve been gone for a longtime, but they didn’t need to be told who I was…I could tell they knew. As the daily rush began, I pulled aside the young boy from earlier and took a good look at him “How ol are you?” I growled, staring him down.

“11” he exhaled, looking up at me.

I shook my head, flicking the last of the blunt out of my mouth “Why the hell are you running with the saints?”

“The money” he nodded, looking at me “My family needs it…and Ro…he said that’s how you got into the game…he said that’s how you survived.”

I shook my head once more and snarled at him “I’m not an idol to follow” I rumbled “and this isn’t what I did when I had a roof. When I had a place to stay I stole for myself, I didn’t join the Saints until I was homeless.”

“No…that’s not what Ro…”

“Boy how dumb are you that you think Ro’s telling you the truth?” I reprimanded with some bite. I looked up at the other teens against the wall and shook my head. “All of yous are fucked, you got no idea, but if you don get out while you can…you gonna end up like me.”

“I want to be like…” the boy began, but before he could finish I cracked him across the face in an attempt to destroy whatever glorified image he had of me.

“Take a look at me.” I bit, pointing out all the blood and scars “You don’t want to be like me. I’m a dead man walkin…get out while you can.” I grumbled as the boy scurried off to the safety of the other teens.

I eyed them down to remind them who was in charge of this corner. I assumed seeing the money coming my way would at least make me slightly miss gang life…but hell, I can’t wait to get the fuck out of here. Owen better find his strength, because the first chance we get, I’m running, whether he’s ready or not.