I Hate This Town - 2. Two: Puppy

The encounters stopped after that. When he saw the other boy in passing, Finn would frown and avert his eyes. It bothered Alec a little bit, but it was for the best. They came from different worlds and Finn was happy in this terrible town. As soon as Alec clawed his way to graduation, he’d be gone. He’d never look back and that was that. He told River as much as they sprawled out on the living room floor two weeks after encounter eight. It was Saturday. There were half-opened pizzas boxes, bottles of sugary soda, and a bowl of popcorn littered around them while a horror movie played behind them for ambiance. River was a junior like Finn and an incredibly smart one. He could already graduate if he wanted to, but he wasn’t sure where he wanted to go or what to do with his life. It filled Alec with a new hope. Maybe if he worked his butt off, he could graduate early too. The thought of his timeline moving up excited him.

“Can I ask you something?” River asked, Nintendo Switch held over his face as he battled through some game, laying on his back.

“Sure, why not?” Alec replied, messaging someone on a forum he’d found for homeschooled kids who didn’t like other homeschooled kids. For a long time, the people he’d met there were his only connection to the outside world.

“Finn Larson. What’s the deal with you two?” River’s blue eyes flicked to Alec, his fingers still tapping buttons and moving the little joystick.

“Nothing. There is no deal.” Alec scooped up a slice of the nearby pepperoni pizza and shrugged.

“He has the reputation of being, like, the nicest guy in school and everyone’s saying you’ve been really mean to him for no reason. How come?”

“Is that what everyone’s saying?” he rolled his eyes, “I used to see him at their store, and I don’t know. I guess that made him think he knows me? He tried being all buddy-buddy and I didn’t like it.”

“Hm, maybe that’s for the best. The group he hangs out with…they’re not great people. They act like they are when he’s around, but the minute he’s not? Snakes. The lot of ‘em.” River was nodding, tongue sticking out as he struggled to beat a level, “But Finn is legitimately a nice guy.”

“Do you like him or something?” Alec paused after the harsh words left his mouth. They were unnecessarily mean. River was the only person who’d been nice to him and here he was being rude right back. Not to mention...pot, kettle. Alec shook his head, “Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

River shrugged, unbothered, and the boys’ night returned to lighthearted fun, too much junk food, and video game battles. Later, when River was passed out, blanket throw over his chest, Alec was still awake. He was lost in thought as he stared out the kitchen’s sliding glass door. Open concepts were weird. It felt strange for him to be able to see out a door in another room from where he currently was in the living room. He stared out into the night and thought. He’d most definitely been rude to Finn. More than once. For really no good reason. It wasn’t his fault that his friends had acted weird when he hadn’t been looking at them. It wasn’t his fault that Alec hated being touched and he’d done so without thinking.

Alec curled around the pillow he held to his chest. He wanted to apologize but tomorrow was Sunday. He didn’t know if he’d be brave enough to wait until school on Monday. He clutched the pillow tighter and closed his eyes. Larson’s was open tomorrow. Maybe Finn would be working? It seemed likely. Alec didn’t think he was there much during the week with classes and sports. He’d learned through the grapevine that Finn was in pretty much every sport the school offered. There was talk he would have interest from big name colleges when he graduated. He was going places in life. Alec toyed with the corner of his pillow as he smiled softly. Maybe he wasn’t the only one who wanted to leave town? Maybe that was another thing Alec had misjudged about the other boy.

The store was surprisingly busy for a Sunday afternoon. Alec fidgeted, once again holding his skateboard to his chest as he tried to work up the nerve to go inside. Finn was behind the counter, smiling brightly at an older woman as he handed over a paper bag and her change. The woman left the store and gave Alec a curious look. Probably because he was hovering by the door like some kind of weird stalker. There were still a few people inside, so he decided to sit on a nearby metal bench and wait for the place to empty. It took nearly an hour. Alec had been watching almost obsessively, so when the coast was clear, he’d be ready.

But he wasn’t.

His hands slid on his board as they began to sweat and his whole body felt hot. He swallowed and made himself stand. No, he’d decided he was going to do this today. He was going to properly apologize to Finn. It would be easier now than in school too. Alec swallowed hard again, and his feet carried him back to the door. His body was stiff and he was starting to feel like he might be sick. The bell above the door chimed his arrival and he heard a cheerful, “Hey! Be right with you!”

The voice had come from behind the counter. From his position close to the door, he could see Finn fiddling with something while crouched. When he straightened, Finn opened the register and fed in the new roll of what Alec assumed was receipt paper in. When he was done, Finn’s bright smile popped onto his face and he turned to the doorway. It faltered a little when his eyes landed on Alec.

“Oh, hi.” Finn tried valiantly to revive the happiness in his grin, but he was unsuccessful.

It made Alec feel like the worst person on the face of the Earth.

He forced himself forward. There were a few feet between him and the counter now. Finn rubbed the back of his head and tried again for a smile, “Here for something for your mom again? Was it raspberry that she liked?”

That’s right. Alec’s ongoing excuse for visiting the shop on encounters one through five was that he was picking out a sweet for his mom. It’d been a while and Alec was surprised his classmate remembered. He shook his head. That wasn’t why he was here. It’d be so much easier to choose that route. To pretend like he’d never been awful to Finn for no reason.

“No. That’s, uh, not why I’m here.”

Finn rested his elbows on the case. His face softened a bit and his smile was gentle, “Okay. Then what can I help you with?”

Alec rubbed his cheek hard and opened his mouth, eyes widening when everything poured out of it, “I came to apologize. It’s not your fault I was acting that way at school. It was my first day in a public school after I’d been homeschooled all my life. That’s not your fault either and it wasn’t okay for me to take things out on you. I didn’t lie when I said I don’t like to be touched, so it did freak me out a little when you grabbed me so suddenly. I’m also sorry for the other times I was rude or said mean things to you. You didn’t deserve any of it.”

Finn blinked once and then twice, his mouth hanging open a little. His normal smile worked its way back onto his face and he tilted his head to the side, “Wow, okay. I felt awful for a while. I thought I hurt you when I grabbed you or something. I couldn’t figure out why you hated me out of nowhere.”

“Yeah. So, that’s it. That’s why I came. I’m sorry. I don’t hate you.” Alec’s cheeks were hot and it annoyed him endlessly. He had prepared for this moment and it hadn’t mattered. It’d rushed out of him so fast and he’s sounded like a certifiable crazy person.

“I’m sorry too. For grabbing you. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

Encounter nine had gone about as terrible as Alec had expected, but it opened a new kind of door for him. Finn would wave at him when he saw him in the hallway. A couple times, they’d even walked from one class to another together. Alec still saw all the looks and heard the whispers, but he ignored them for Finn’s sake. As far as he could tell, the boy was genuine.

The weeks dragged on. He was doing well in classes, but he still wasn’t making much progress in the friend department. To his parents’s utter dismay. Besides River, he hadn’t made any more. Well, there was another one at least, or one that was trying to be a friend. Finn had tried pretty hard. He’d invite Alec to sit with them at lunch. Alec would use River as an excuse. He couldn’t very well leave his only friend to eat alone! Finn tried to get him to go on group outings. Alec would pick apart the location, the group, anything he could to poke holes in Finn’s plans. The boy was too nice to risk putting Alec in a situation where he might be uncomfortable, so the blond always dropped it. Finn even asked Alec to watch him play football. That excuse was easy. The seating hurt his back and backside and the stands were simply too jam packed full of people. Even though Alec continued to turn him down, Finn never seemed deterred. He would rework things so that it was just a couple people or move the outing to a smaller location. It was all very…sweet. Alec knew that Finn was going above and beyond. Did that make him suck it up and attend? Absolutely not, and Finn acting that way only led to more problems.

Alec was having a hard time keeping Finn categorized in his head as a new friend and not a very large, unsightly crush. Not that Finn was unsightly-no-the crush was. It was only Finn’s junior year, but he practically lived in the gym and his results were starting to become obvious. Alec had to work really hard to ignore the broad shoulders and the muscled arms. He had to work even harder to ignore the girls in school that were practically throwing themselves at the blond. He couldn’t blame them. Not really. If he’d been like them, he might’ve felt safe enough to do so too. Alas, he was still a scrawny boy experiencing his first brutal crush. He had known for a while that he swung a certain way. He’d investigated thoroughly when he’d stumbled upon the wonderful world of porn. Women were beautiful and he got the draw, but they simply didn’t do anything for him. He had no intention of sharing that fact with anyone. That was just what he needed. To be ostracized for who he was attracted to. The kids at school found plenty of reasons to do that already. If River hadn’t guessed by himself, Alec wouldn't have told him either.

The real kicker of the entire thing was, again, Finn was nice to him. For someone who’d struggled to make friends or even feel normal around his peers, that was big. Someone being kind to you was a game changer. Alec had to remind himself daily that Finn was off limits and would never think about him that way even if he weren’t. He couldn’t afford to lose one of his two friends. That was just pathetic. Not that River wasn’t great, but…one friend? One? Ugh.

“Hey! Alec, are you listening?” He jumped as Finn’s cheerful voice broke him from his thoughts. He looked around his locker door at him. He was smiling, like normal, and almost wiggling in place with excitement. Alec bit his lip. Like a puppy. Finn was like a giant, happy, puppy. He could almost picture a golden tail wagging behind the taller boy.

“I’m sorry I was zoning out. What?” Finn drooped a little and Alec pictured golden ears flattening on the top of his head. He snickered to himself and his laughter brought the megawatt smile back onto Finn’s face.

“Tonight! We’re all going to have a bonfire at my place! Just a few people, maybe some hotdogs. S’mores maybe? Other garbage food I shouldn’t be eating, hah hah hah!” The tail would be wagging at an intense speed if it existed. Finn seemed to get more excited the longer he spoke.

“Uh, I don’t know. I have a lot of homework and finals are coming up. I want to make sure I’m in a good place.” Alec closed his locker and held his English textbook to his chest.

“But you’re so smart! You could fail every final and probably still have good grades! Please Alec? You never come when I invite you!” The ears were flat again, the tail would be dipping to the floor.

“I-I don’t know Finn. It’s just…the people and you know I don’t do well with like social stuff. Don’t you remember how long it took for me to be able to talk to you normal?” Alec pushed his freshly dyed purple hair away from his eyes and smiled weakly.

“What if you bring River? He’s super awesome and you guys are friends, right? Would that make you more comfortable? I know it’s not really your scene, but we’ve never really hung outside of school.” Finn frowned more and looked down at Alec with the biggest puppy dog eyes he’d ever seen. Alec sputtered. That simply wasn’t fair.

“I…I’ll think about it okay? Maybe I’ll run it by River.”

“Really?!” A smile to rival the very sun exploded on Finn’s face and he hugged Alec suddenly. Alec stiffened and Finn froze, “I’m sorry. I forgot. I forgot! Jeez, Finn get it together.”

He released him immediately and Finn’s fingers dragged through his purposely messy hair. He looked down at his feet and Alec frowned. It was easy to see that the blond was mentally berating himself. Alec sighed. It had been unexpected, but as far as touches went, it wasn’t terrible. He realized why fast. Finn did everything he could to accommodate him. He felt safe with Finn. Which seemed strange. They’d only been “friends” for a few weeks. How had the blond managed to scale the very, very high walls Alec had built to keep everyone away?

Alec reached out, hesitated, and then rested his hand lightly on the other’s shoulder. Finn blinked owlishly and stared at the contact. His mouth was open a little. Alec cleared his throat as he lost his nerve and withdrew his hand, “Like I said. I’ll ask River. I’ll text you or something, okay?”

Finn nodded vigorously, still staring at his shoulder, “Yeah! If you decide to come, let me know what kind of snacks or soda you guys want. Anything you want!”

Alec smiled nervously as he turned to walk to class, “I’ll think about it Finn.”

“Hopefully see you tonight!” Finn was waving. Alec didn’t have to look to know. He did anyways, just to confirm. Sure enough, Finn was waving so hard he’d become a hazard to passing students. He almost elbowed a girl in the face and Alec watched mortification descend on his face as he fell all over himself to apologize profusely and probably offer up his first-born child as payment for his unforgivable act. Alec smiled, holding his book tighter as he walked to class.

He slid through the door just as the bell sounded and Mr. Humch, his English teacher, glared daggers at him as he hurried to his seat by River. The teacher was still giving him dirty looks as he took attendance. Alec waved nervously at his friend nervously and settled into his seat, taking out his pens and notebook. A crumpled-up sheet of paper inched across the aisle and Alec snatched it as covertly as he could.

It took him a second to make out River’s messy scrawl.

You were almost late! Humch is going to hate you all next week! Where were you?

Alec wrote back quickly and the paper exchanged hands again. He figured this was the best time to broach the bonfire topic with River. He doubted his friend would be excited. The boy was nearly as antisocial as he was. He listened to the teacher with one ear as he waited for River’s response.

Tonight? At Larsen’s house? How could I say no? He’s the love of your life! Who am I to stand in the way of true love!

Alec rolled his eyes and ripped a fresh sheet of paper. They’d quickly run out of room. River had been forced to listen to all his complaining over the weeks about his unrequited love that he was desperately trying to deny even now. He scribbled something rude on the note with a promise to talk more after school. He really did need to pay attention and this was the final period of the day.

It hadn’t mattered. Not really. He couldn’t focus. All he could think about the entire class was messy blond hair, big brown eyes, a wagging tail, and ears that weren’t really there. He stuffed his textbook into his locker and sighed. He collected the things he’d need for the weekend and closed his dark green locker door. He leaned against it as other kids milled about, heading out for the weekend. River was taking longer than usual to meet him and that gave him too much time to think. Did this invite mean something? Had the others? Finn was, by default, friendly and welcoming. He could and would talk to anyone. The boy wasn’t shy. He had a literal horde of friends and Alec had seen him excitedly plan events before, but this time had seemed different. He couldn’t put his finger on why either and it bothered him.

“Heylo.” River saluted as he walked up to the locker. His brown hair had been tamed a little today and he’d recently shaved it into an undercut. Alec’s eyes flicked to his mouth. Last weekend, they’d been brave-or stupid depending on who you asked-and Alec had pierce River’s lip in his friend’s’ bathroom. Alec cringed. It’d bled more than they’d anticipated, and they had descended quickly into panic. It looked better today and Alec was relieved it was healing. He’d have felt awful if it’d gotten infected. Alec yanked himself from his thoughts. He needed to focus and see what the plan was.

“What do you think?” Alec asked as they began to walk toward the main doors.

“About the bonfire? It might be fun. It also might be hell on earth. Who’s all going?” River sighed as he tromped next to Alec.

“I don’t know. Finn said it wouldn’t be many people and he said he’d get us whatever we wanted. That’s about all I know.” Alec shrugged.

“You know there’s going to be a million people there, right?” River sighed more heavily this time, “Finn is the most popular guy in school. Everyone loves him. If a couple invites go out, word’s going to spread. Whether Finn plans for it to or not. I also heard his parents are out of town this whole weekend and it’s just his older brother home with him.”

“Yes or no? You know I can’t make this decision alone. I’m not strong enough!” Alec whined, throwing his hands down dramatically.

“Oh god! Just say you’ll go. If you hate it then it might stop Finn from asking you all the time. He wouldn’t want his little alternative prince to be uncomfy, would he?” River cooed.

“Shut up someone’s going to hear you!” Alec groaned. River laughed as they climbed into his ancient, barely running sedan. After a few minutes of hectic school parking lot traffic, they got on the road and Alec worked up the courage to speak again.

“So we’re going then?”

“Sure. We can always leave early if it sucks.” River shrugged then he grew excited as he added, “I want sour cream and cheddar chips and root beer or else I will riot.”

Alec chuckled nervously. His hands went clammy and he almost dropped his phone as he slid it from his jacket’s pocket. He opened his messages and clicked on Finn’s name. A smile grew on his face as it opened to the last message he'd recieved. It was simply twenty exclamation points followed with a link to a ridiculous cat video. He shook his head and typed out a quick message, complete with River’s sustenance demands.

The little dots appeared in the bottom left corner and Alec bit down lightly on his lower lip as he waited. The dots disappeared and suddenly the phone lit up with Finn’s name. Alec had assigned a golden retriever as his contact photo and it made him smile every time.

Alec cut his thoughts off again and hurried to answer the call, “Uh, h-hello?”

“YOU’RE REALLY COMING? River too?” Alec held the phone away from his ear as Finn tried his hardest to shatter his eardrum. River laughed behind his hand in the driver’s seat and Alec threw up his middle finger.

“Hey! Yes! Please stop yelling!” Alec said a bit sharper than he’d planned.

“Sorry! I’m just super excited. I saw your message about what River wanted, but do you…do you want anything?” Finn faltered a little at the end and his voice deepened as its volume dropped. It made Alec’s stomach twist almost painfully.

“It’s fine. I’ll just see you tonight. Text me your address and the time.” Alec’s ears were on fire as River smirked knowingly at him, “I’ll see you later Finn.”

“Bye Alec!” Finn practically sang on the other end. Alec groaned. He was already regretted his decision.