[Cia] Good-bye

[Cia]

I wrote this because I'm sitting all alone in a moment where I haven't been alone in nearly 11 years. I'm hoping getting out some of the feelings here that I can't in person, because I have to be the strong one who makes it better for everyone else, will help.

***

It started as pressure building up and a slight burning in my throat. My breath caught and the hitch couldn't be covered. I waved one hand, asking for a minute. A tissue was crumpled in my hand already, the soft ball clenched hard as I tried to hold on.

 

Saying good-bye couldn't be done in a stranger's room, in their blankets. I rushed out to get yours and spread it out in the back seat. I held you in my arms, stroked your face, and told you exactly what you needed me to say. I said again and again how much we all loved you. I promised we'd be going home soon.

 

You kept looking up at me, your brown eyes liquid as your eyebrows shifted back and forth. You were so strong, staying longer than they said you would but in the end your eyes closed. I whispered a broken goodbye and covered you up.

 

They said I did the right thing, but the right thing hurt like hell. There's something about making the choice that closed those eyes that haunts me. I turn around a dozen times, expecting you to be with me, and fight that burning when the memory of that moment hits all over again.

 

Today would have been your birthday.

 

I’m sorry.

 

Strider

11-22-2001 to 11-20-2012

[layla]

He was beautiful, I am so sorry for your loss

[Marzipan]

I'm very sorry about your lost, Cia. Our pets are not just pets. They are family. Hold on to the good memories.

[joann414]

What a gorgeous animal. HUgs Cia, and I am sure all of our pets of years past welcomed him into pet heaven where he is once again a happy, healthy, Strider. Hugs!

[Mark92]

Awww so, so sorry Cia, that brought tears to my eyes and a lump in my throat

Really truely sorry

[Agaith]

I'm so sorry for your loss Cia, our thoughts are with you We're all here for you

[asamvav111]

I am sorry. I don't know what to say. May Lord bless his soul. Hugs.

[Breeze]

I am so sorry for your loss. Our pets are family and they are precious.

[CassieQ]

I'm so sorry Cia.

[K.C.]

I'm so sorry, Cia!

[Slytherin]

I am so sorry for your loss Cia

[Andy78]

I'm so sorry Cia

 

Losing a pet is never easy, they really do become part of the family.

 

Take care

[Cia]

Thank you everyone. I know a lot of people have been there, but the sympathy really helps. Thanks.

[NaperVic]

I'm so sorry for your loss Cia. My dog Mina is my most loyal friend and your post reminds me how much Mina & I communicate just with the look in our eyes.

[IanGf]

for such a beatiful person something this sad is truly CRAPPY. Sorry for your loss.