Religious Nuts- how do you deal with them?

[JamesSavik]

As I live in Mississippi, there are more religious nuts than alligators and we've got a butt load of alligators.

 

No, thank you, I don't want to join your wretched cult doesn't seem to work.

 

Neither does Odin is angered when I stray from the true faith.

 

How do you deal with pushy religious cretins that just know that the only reason you say no is Satan?

 

 

[wildone]

James,

 

Very good post.

 

Notice that you didn't identify any particular religion or sects. The topic is how to deal with religious nuts.

 

Please do not make any posts about any one religion or affiliation OR discuss the benefits or harms of religion.

 

Any posts doing so could become under review of the Forum Moderation Team.

 

Trying to keep this topic open and James has done so

[Arpeggio]

Speaking spanish to them does not help either. 

[Tomas]

I usually just say, "Not interested" point to the "NO SOLICITING" sign and close the door. Of course, I don't think any of them can read, or if they can, they haven't a clue what the word no or soliciting means.

 

One that I remember:

 

Opened the door and the first words out of his mouth was "Have you been saved?" Looked at him and responded, "Yes! A long time ago from religious freaks like you." then closed the door. 

[Ron]

As I live in Mississippi, there are more religious nuts than alligators and we've got a butt load of alligators.

 

No, thank you, I don't want to join your wretched cult doesn't seem to work.

 

Neither does Odin is angered when I stray from the true faith.

 

How do you deal with pushy religious cretins that just know that the only reason you say no is Satan?

 

As far as I am aware, Satan is not a God. So, where is the conflict?

 

I usually just say, "Not interested" point to the "NO SOLICITING" sign and close the door. Of course, I don't think any of them can read, or if they can, they haven't a clue what the word no or soliciting means.

 

One that I remember:

 

Opened the door and the first words out of his mouth was "Have you been saved?" Looked at him and responded, "Yes! A long time ago from religious freaks like you." then closed the door. 

 

I used this tact once, "Are you kidding me! Hahahaha." followed by a shut door in the face. It was effective, if rude, and I was already in a bad mood but it was not as if they were invited, so I didn't feel bad about it until later.

[Breeze]

Tell them your on  the phone, you'll be right back, close the door, then go watch tv, play an online game, cook dinner, etc. Failing that I always say thanks  so much, but I have my own higher power that I'm quite happy with and then I close the door.

[rustle]

If I have any respect for them, I'll discuss theology calmly with them, tell them honestly what my beliefs are, and part, hopefully as friends. I tell them I don't believe you can choose to have faith. It's got to come from within. Usually, I can tell them I've read their book, and found wisdom in it, but faith is a gift I have yet to receive.

 

If it's a stranger, I'm firm, dismissive, and don't give them an instant more of my time than it takes to close the door. If they get in my face, I tell them I've asked them to leave my property, that they are refusing to do so, and my next move will be to call the cops to have them arrested for trespassing. And close the door.

 

It's been a while since anyone approached me in public, but I'm pretty good at ignoring somebody.

[W_L]

What's in it for me? Salvation, Ascension, an end to suffering, or an orgy

 

A sales pitch has to be good or else no one will buy your product or service. It has to have some sex appeal (a certain "V" word appears a lot in different religions for a good reason), a catchy tune (Music is common for everyone, just please no elevator music), and some famous looks (Beard, bald, a business suit, or a pitchfork...I mean trident ).

 

If you can do all that and make me smile, I say, "I will think about it."

[A.J.]

I don't answer the door unless I know who is on the other side. If I am in public and I see anyone approaching that I don't want to deal with I pull out my phone and pretend I'm talking to someone and walk right past them.  I have a funny story I could tell, but it would break the moderator's rule.

[joann414]

Well, read my blog about accidentally pulling a gun on a snake, and the Jehovah Witnesses thought it was for them

[Bill W]

I used to argue the theological basis of their argument, but I soon learned my grandfather's advice had been correct.  You cannot argue or reason with someone who is convinced they are right. 

[Henry_Henry2012]

I tell them I'm a shrink and they seem to back away . . . despite the fact that I'm not. 

[Tom]

i use the same response for all religions that come knocking...I believe in god, and Jesus Christ; I do not however believe in organized religion in any form.  Too many have been found corrupt.  

 

when they say that theirs isn't corrupt, i respond with something to the effect that just because they don't know about the corruption, doesn't mean it's not there

 

hugs,

    Tom

[Ron]

I tell them I'm a shrink and they seem to back away . . . despite the fact that I'm not. 

 

Are you entirely sure it's the part where you tell them you're a shrink? 

[Krista]

Depends on the person(s) and the mood I'm in.  If I answer the door to, "Don't you know the End is near?", I'll usually say, "I wasn't aware, no," and close the door. I think I sufficiently answered their question. If I'm in a bad mood or in a state of dress that I don't want visitors, I just don't open the door, or I do and tell them I'm busy.. or if they're pushy, I put a bit more force in closing the door than necessary.  None of them are ever really pushy around here though, I dare say if one was, they might lose a few toes or fingers if they try to block the door from closing. 

 

If it is those people handing out those small green/red bibles I just smile and tell them I already have one. Because I do already have one... and the print is larger and easier to read than in those tiny little things.

 

If they are just wanting to be informational about their church/movement/organization, I listen. I mean they are at least being nice about it.

 

I never let them in the house though, once they get into the house they're difficult to get back out.

 

Where I live now, I have child proofed the front gate, and you'd be surprised how many adults have trouble with it.

[Henry_Henry2012]

Are you entirely sure it's the part where you tell them you're a shrink? 

 

No. Not really. Haha.

 

It's my sardonic look and evil eye that speaks of a lower power that generates 'would-be' solicitors to be disinterested upon their cause to titillate my afternoon with elven speak. 

 

Fine! I tell them I'm gay and they all back away. If they don't believe me, I speak like Hannibal Lecter from Silence of the Lambs and they seem to get my point.

 

*starts flicking my tongue*

 

(I will eat your liver if you don't get on your car and leave me alone . . . sir.)

[Ron]

There you go! 

[thephoenix]

I have been quite fortunate to not have to deal directly with these people though I have witnessed a few religious nuts yelling in the center of campus making total fools of themselves while students stand around taking videos on their camera phones (an area we call the "flagpoles" because...well...it's a circle of flagpoles.)

 

You have my condolences.

Edited October 6, 2013 by thephoenix

[hh5]

you do have signs like the looney tunes

[TetRefine]

Funny you should bring this up, because I was in the city last night for dinner with my boyfriend, and after we ate we decided to walk around. We ended up sitting in Washington Square Park in the middle of Center City, and like a hundred other couples sitting in that park we just held hands and talked while sitting on a bench. This old black guy slowly walks by us and gives me the evil eye of homosexual disapproval. I stared straight back at him with the coldest look I could put on my face and eventually he just kept walking. When we left the park about 20 minutes later he was standing there handing out pamphlets and hollered something at us about how homosexual sinners were going to hell or whatever. The best way is to ignore them and not give them the time of day. 

[Kitt]

I've found asking for the hall elders name to explain that several of the congregation do not understand the word no works pretty well.

It is advice given me by an elder from one particular group but has worked on several different denominations so far.

[Sasha Distan]

i once opened the front door to a pair of them while holding an open copy of the Satanic Bible (art school research). they've not been back since....

Edited October 9, 2013 by Graeme

[Freddyness]

Me i tend to open the door and glare. 

When they start speaking I smack the wall if the carry on I slam the door in there face. The wall is one the echos when you hit it XD and shakes XD

[hh5]

mmm planters's need to sell more dried fruit

[Zombie]

Answer the door smiling and naked, and call over your shoulder: "Jeff, honey, your birthday present's arrived!"