The Cockney Canuck - 47. Chapter 47 Nathan's House

“What did he want?” asked Daniel. He seemed to be a little surprised on Saturday evening, when I mentioned to him that Nathan had come to the house earlier that day. “I already told him I was gonna be out all day.”

I knew that too, which was precisely the reason why his friend had decided to show up. “He brought me some DVD’s over. Monty Python! I had to leave my collection in England.”

It was late when Daniel got home and I was ready for bed; sitting at my desk in just a pair of pyjama bottoms.

“That was cool of him to do that,” he said. He sat on his bed and peeled off his dirty t-shirt, then gave me a teasing smile. “I think he has a soft spot for you.”

“Well, now’s his chance,” I said, “because I no longer have a girlfriend.” It was my boldest statement yet and although completely off the cuff and disguised as a joke, it was a subtle clue. It felt as if I was testing the waters; trying to get a reaction, which would allow me to prepare for what lie ahead. If it was progress though, it was tiny. Like dipping my toe into an icy pond and hoping to understand what it would be like to take the plunge.

Daniel didn’t bite at the joke, but he did respond to my news about Fran, which, as I had expected, he had already heard about on the school grape vine.

“Did she dump you?”

“No, of course not.” I was anxious to set him right, although I don’t know why. It would have been a whole lot easier if that had been the case.

“You dumped her?” he said, sounding unsure about whether or not he should believe me.

I shifted uncomfortably in my chair and turned to look back at the computer. “No, not exactly, we just decided to….”

“Yeah right,” he said, “I know that doesn’t happen. One of you guys met someone else and I’m guessing it was her.” I wasn’t sure if I should have been happy or not by that remark, but I took it with a pinch of salt, after all, he was way off target and I wanted to keep it that way.

“Well, I don’t care,” I said.

“That’s too bad, I thought you were good together.”

‘Why does everyone keep saying that’?

“And she was…?”

“What?” I asked.

“Well, she was…hot.”

“Ha, you’re more than welcome to her if you want mate. You know, keep it in the family.” I winked at him and he rolled his eyes, as he took off his shorts and threw them at me.

“Shut up, I don’t want your cast offs, besides she wouldn’t want me anyway.”

There was something in that statement and in the way that he said it, that bothered me. Daniel was always very laid back and didn’t usually feel the need to go fishing for compliments or assurances, so this was a rare moment and an opportunity for me to play big brother.

“What makes you say that,” I asked, turning in my chair to face him.

“I’ve never had a girlfriend.”

“So what, you’re only fourteen, you got years of that shit.”

“Yeah well, Doug’s got a girlfriend now and even Nathan’s hiding something. Ah, it doesn’t matter.” He bunched up his socks to throw them at me too. I deflected them with my arm and walked over to sit next to him at the end of his bed.

“So you wanna get laid, right?”

“No,” he said, looking down at the floor, “I mean, yes of course, doesn’t everyone?”

“I think so.”

“Well then, I’m no different.”

I looked across at him, thinking over my next words carefully. “Daniel, I bet there are a lot of girls in school, who would gladly take off their knickers for you at the drop of a hat mate.” He laughed, but I was being serious.

“You definitely have a way with words dude,” he said, “but thanks for the compliment.”

I laughed with him. “You don’t have to worry mate, besides, you’re too young to be having sex. What would your mom say if she could hear you talking like this, her sweet, innocent little boy?”

“Go away,” he said, as he elbowed me playfully in the ribs, “you’re not innocent are you?”

“I know I’m not.”

“You’re having sex and you’re only a year older than me.”

“Was,” I said, correcting him, “not anymore. Now I’m like you…jerking off.”

“No I….”

“I hear you.”

“No you don’t.”

“Yes I do.”

“I can hear you too,” he said, turning the tables. “You even wake me up, you’re so loud.”

‘Is he serious’?

“You’re talking rubbish.”

“No I’m not,” he said giggling, “and you talk while you’re doing it…Fran, oh Fran.”

‘Okay, so I know that isn’t true’.

“Whatever.”

“Girls like you though,” he said, returning to a more serious mode.

“Only Fran.”

“No,” he said, “a lot of girls at school like you, even Nicola’s friend Naomi thinks that you’re cute.”

“Fuck, she scares the hell out of me, I bet she’d go with anyone in trousers. As for the others, I’m gonna want proof, like actual names, photographs, telephone numbers would be handy.”

“Shut up dork, they only like you because of your accent.”

“Thanks,” I said and he laughed, “but I suppose you’re right, it does help a bit.”

“A lot,” he said, “even Nathan thinks it’s cute, but don’t ever say that I told you that.” I felt a tingle of excitement running through my body, as he told me something that I already knew.

“Nathan likes anything English,” I said, “even me.”

“Especially you,” he said, smirking. It was followed by a few seconds of uneasy silence, as we both looked around the room searching for something to say and I felt the sudden need to try to steer him off course.

“I’m not looking for a boyfriend at the moment,” I said, “but I’ll keep it in mind, in case I ever decide to switch teams.” I was certain that the next time that I ventured outside, I would be struck down by lightning, but I still wasn’t convinced that he believed me.

“I was only joking,” he said, “but that doesn’t help me.”

“Daniel, you’re a good looking guy and I’m sure that most girls out there would think that you’re…you know, cute or whatever.” He was staring at me and smiling at the awkward way that I was handling it, so I decided to backtrack to more comfortable territory. “Okay so you’re a little weak and scrawny, but we can work on that.”

He pushed me off the end of the bed. “I’m stronger than you,” he said and laughed as I fell onto the floor.

“No you’re not,” I replied, laughing along with him as I got to my knees, “you’re a weakling.”

“I am not,” he said and he made the most of my disposition, by jumping onto my back and pushing down on my shoulders as if he were riding a horse.

“Ah get off me,” I said in-between howls of laughter.

“Giddy up!” he said, as he bounced up and down wearing nothing but a pair boxer shorts. It was pure fun and even though I could clearly feel his knackers pressing against the small of my back, it was completely innocent.

It must have looked a little odd to Nicola however, when she walked in to find out what all the commotion was about. She was holding her phone to her ear, but dropped the conversation the moment she saw us.

“What are you two doing?” she asked trying not to laugh.

“Not what it looks like,” I said and then we both fell sideways in fits of laughter.

“I don’t wanna know,” said Nicola, shaking her head, “just keep the noise down and the door shut okay?” At least she could see the funny side of it and she smiled at us, before talking back into the phone. “Sorry about that, I just walked in and found my brother and Robbie having sex…?” That just made us laugh even more, as she switched the lights off and shut the door.

* * * * *

On Monday, as soon as I walked through the big double doors at the main entrance of the school, I was hi-jacked by the ever boisterous Rory, who threw his arm over my shoulder and gave me a friendly hug.

“Hey buddy,” he said, “you didn’t call me. What happened, I thought you were coming over on Saturday?”

“Sorry mate, I overslept and then forgot about it.” It was the truth, although Nathan had played a big part in the memory lapse and my sudden loss of interest in a sporting event that I had followed religiously, for as long as I could remember.

At some point in the previous week, I had accepted an invitation from Rory to go to his house to watch the English FA Cup Final. Neither of our teams were involved, but that didn’t matter; everybody watched the cup final—a showpiece event like the American Superbowl—which traditionally ended the domestic football season in the UK. Tom and I would usually spend the entire day in front of the box, taking in all the build-up, commentary and post-game analysis, while shoving endless junk food and fizzy drinks down our gobs. Then I would get to sleep over on that crappy air-bed of his and we would stay up late, talking and surfing the internet. They were special times and I was certain that those memories would stay with me forever.

“You forgot, how could you forget about the cup final?” It was a good question and I stared at him for a moment, as I searched for the answer.

‘Have I changed that much in such a short time that I no longer care about something I used to love? Or has Nathan completely taken over every aspect of my life’?

I opted for the latter; it was undeniable. We had only been on one date and I wasn’t sure if that qualified as an actual relationship, or if I should even be thinking of him as my boyfriend yet, but none of that mattered inside. It felt as if every second spent not talking to him, texting him, or even thinking about him, was a precious moment wasted that I would somehow live to regret.

“Are you okay?” We had reached his locker and I was staring into space, deep in thought.

“Yeah,” I said, “I’m fine…so who won anyway?”

He turned to look at me and screwed up his face at my question. “You don’t know?” He looked a little concerned, which was cute, but it made me feel uncomfortable and I wanted to end the conversation as quickly as possible.

“NO,” I snapped, “that’s why I asked you!” I don’t know why I did that, but I regretted it straight away, as he turned his back on me and fumbled around in his locker.

“Chelsea won,” he mumbled, “but it doesn’t matter.” His usual cheerful manner had deserted him and I could see his shoulders drop in disappointment. Rory, when coaxed out of his shell, had a contagiously vibrant personality, but he was fragile and easy to upset. I had hurt his feelings in the past, by not calling him when I said I would and making arrangements that I couldn’t keep, or simply forgot about. I always felt bad about it, but to his credit, he would usually come bouncing back the next day, happy to forgive me and offer up a new plan of action. I probably didn’t deserve his friendship and seeing him upset like that, hurt me.

“I’m sorry mate, I didn’t mean to….” I put my arm around him, but he shrugged it off and slammed his locker shut.

“What are you sorry about,” he said, “are you sorry for not showing up on Saturday, sorry for not even bothering to call me, to tell me that you couldn’t make it, or sorry for talking to me like a piece of shit?” He shook his head at me and walked away.

‘Fuck, now I’ve really upset him, I’m such a jerk’!

I hit my forehead with the palm of my hand, before looking up to see Fran studying me from across the crowded corridor. She was with Laura, who gave me a dirty look before marching away, leaving my ex-girlfriend with a puzzled expression.

“Was that a lover’s tiff?” she asked, mischievously.

“What are you talking about?” I said, walking to my own locker further up the hall. I hoped that she would get the hint, but she kept up with me and I had a feeling that my already troubled morning, was about to get even worse.

“I see you two together a lot and I just wondered if Rory was the lucky guy…you know…who you…pleased.” She had a smirk on her face, but she wasn’t joking, or being nice.

“NO!” I said angrily, “why can’t you just leave it alone, I wish I hadn’t told you now. It’s in the past and it’s not important.” I stopped at my locker and shook my head at her.

“Is he your boyfriend?”

“WHAT? NO! Of course not.”

“I’m not stupid,” she said, “Rory is so gay, it’s not even funny and you’re his only friend. You two are always talking and sharing little jokes; I see you. I even remember you asking me if I thought he was gay, oh and wasn’t it him who you went to Toronto with, you remember, the same day that you decided to break the news to me?”

“You would make a good detective Fran, but you’re wrong.” I paused to think about what she had just said. “Well you’re right about some things; I mean, I am his friend and we do talk a lot. We did go to the game together and I don’t deny asking you about him. I think that he’s probably gay too and maybe he likes me in that way…but what you’re saying is crazy, it just doesn’t add up.” I closed my locker, satisfied that I had made my point, but she just stared at me.

“You need to think about what you just said.”

“I didn’t leave you for Rory,” I said quietly, as we walked together to class, “and I’ve never been with him, in the way that you think.”

“I don’t care,” she said.

“Yes you do, or you wouldn’t be asking.”

“Whatever; I just wish you’d be honest with me. I won’t tell anyone.”

“You still don’t believe me, do you?” I said, as we joined the back of the line and walked into class.

“No.”

“Why? I’ve told you the truth, you know everything about me.”

“I don’t think I know anything about you Robbie and I’m not sure that I ever did.” She sounded a little hurt when she said that and it made me feel bad again. I never wanted to hurt her, but there was little that I could do now to stop it. Once Fran had an idea in her head, it was difficult to budge and it was obvious that she believed that Rory and I were more than just good friends.

As I passed his desk, I offered him a conciliatory smile, but he looked down towards his books the moment our eyes met.

‘Sorry Rory, I’ll make it up to you somehow, I promise’.

I took my seat in the row behind and studied him, as Mrs. Reigor called the class to order and then stared at his shapely butt throughout the national anthem. It was something that I did every day; he stood right in front of me; what else was I supposed to look at for those boring couple of minutes. It was usually just a bit of harmless perving in order to liven my morning mood, but that day Fran’s words got me thinking.

‘What if I hadn’t met Nathan, or if he wasn’t interested in me? Would I be chasing him instead? Would he have wanted that? I think he might’.

I knew that it would have been a lot easier with Rory, because he wasn’t out and when it came time to show our hands, I had no doubts that introducing him to the family would have been a lot less challenging than explaining away Nathan.

That was all conjecture of course, played out in my mind in preference to listening to Mrs. Reigor rattling on about the merits of Shakespeare. Rory was undeniably cute and more than worthy of a few fantasies—if I could fit anymore in—but it was Nathan who held all the cards and no matter how difficult the road ahead was going to be, nothing was going to change that.

If I managed to learn anything in English that day, it was that I needed to be more of a friend to Rory, while making it clear to him that I wasn’t interested in going any further than that. He was a good kid, who deserved a lot better than he got, not just from me, but from everyone. I liked him and not just in a naughty way either, he was a nice bloke, who was a lot of fun to be with and I wanted him as a friend.

It took me the best part of the rest of the day, to drag a smile out of poor Rory, but when I did at lunchtime, he seemed to ease comfortably back into his more familiar easy-going skin. I sat with him in the cafeteria, instead of sharing a table with Nathan. It was my boyfriend’s idea, which I had reluctantly agreed to, in one of the many text messages that had passed between us the previous day. I could understand his reasoning, but the enforced separation from the boy that I craved was difficult for me to handle. I attempted a little damage limitation, by grabbing the closest available table to where Nathan was already sitting, with his usual posse of friends. Then I craftily manoeuvred an unsuspecting Rory, so that he sat with his back to them and I had Nathan directly in my line of sight, just to the right of him. It was perfect and as I glanced over at my beautiful boy, he smiled and shook his head at me playfully, in acknowledgment of my carefully executed plan. It helped alleviate the discomfort to a certain extent, but after being allowed to get so close to him at the weekend, watching from a distance was no longer going to cut the mustard and it was difficult to see how this was ever going to work for any length of time.

I tried to concentrate on Rory, the boy who I was actually having lunch with, but it wasn’t easy and I must have seemed distant at times. After offering yet another heartfelt apology for not turning up on Saturday, we got talking about the up-coming soccer World Cup in South Africa. England had qualified top of their group and for once, we would be able to put local rivalries aside and cheer on the same team. I was looking forward to the tournament and Rory’s dad’s extensive cable TV package, would enable him to watch just about every game live. I didn’t care to watch every match, but the England games were a must see for me and we didn’t have those sports channels at home.

“That would be really cool mate, I’ll definitely be there this time,” I said in response to his belated invitation to watch it at his house.

“Definitely?” he said.

“I promise,” and I’ll bring over all the essentials, “warm beer, meat pies and toilet rolls to throw on the pitch.”

“You’re crazy?”

“I know.”

“You don’t have to bring anything, just don’t let me down, okay?”

“I won’t,” I said, “no way I’m gonna miss that!”

* * * * *

Wednesday couldn’t come quick enough, but when it did, I was ready. I had spent hours on the computer downloading free video editing software and finding out how to use it. I had never been interested previously in making or editing films, but I guess Nathan’s enthusiasm had rubbed off on me, because I enjoyed learning about it and the thought of doing something creative with him, was all the inspiration that I needed. He had been cagey, when I had asked him on the phone about the project that I was supposed to be helping him with, but whenever I put the words, Nathan, camera and video together in my head, I couldn’t help conjuring up all kinds of naughty scenarios.

Most of these imaginary movies, had they been real, would never have made it onto YouTube and a few might have actually got me time in the local nick, but they certainly got the job done when it came to a little light relief the night before. This time however, I made sure that Daniel was well and truly in the land of nod, before commencing any wrist action.

It was just after three, when the bus dropped us a short distance from his house on Hillcrest Avenue. It was a narrow street in a leafy, up-market neighbourhood and not what I had been expecting at all. It just wasn’t the type of place that I had imagined Nathan would be living. The area didn’t suit him at all. It was way too quiet and old looking, almost too respectable for a boy so incredibly hot and sassy. It had a very laid back, almost retired feel to it and it was empty, even by Canadian standards.

The houses were big and old, as were the trees that lined the sidewalk; their huge branches spreading halfway across the empty road to meet in the middle, blocking out most of the sunlight. The only sounds other than our footsteps, were a television and a distant lawnmower and the only sign of life was a dog that surprised us with a couple of barks from behind a wooden fence, before retreating back to its house. It was a nice day and warm enough to be outside without a jacket—which I had stuffed in my oversized backpack—but despite only a single layer and a cool breeze, I was still sweating.

“Are you okay?” Nathan turned to me looking concerned, “your face is really red.”

“I’m a little nervous.”

“You don’t have to be nervous,” he said, “they don’t bite. I might do, but they don’t.”

“I don’t mind you biting me, if you want?” I said with a smirk, “as long as it’s not too hard.”

“You might regret that; I’ve got strong teeth you know.”

“I’ve noticed, they’re pretty white too.”

“There’s a reason for that,” he said, “my dad’s a dentist.”

“You’re kidding?”

“No dude seriously, he works in town. He’s quite good, Daniel goes to him and Nicola too, I think. Sue will probably send you there.”

“Wow,” I said, “that’s weird. I don’t think that I have any cavities at the moment but I’ll keep it in mind…I don’t usually like dentists.”

“Ha, who does?” he said, “but you’ll like him, I’m sure.” Strangely enough, it didn’t feel dissimilar to going to the dentist, as I walked alongside him, unsure of what to expect and worried in case they were able to figure us out. The way that we had been acting around each other lately, I didn’t think that it would be too difficult and I was preparing for an uncomfortable evening.

“This is it dude,” he said, as he veered across the grass, towards an old timber house which was partially obscured by a big oak tree. To the left was a new double garage with a Mercedes-Benz parked in the driveway.

“Nice car,” I remarked.

“My dad’s,” he said, “it’s his early day today, so he’s home already.”

‘Just my luck’.

The front door was unlocked and required only a gentle push from Nathan for it to open into a bright, tiled hallway. He ushered me inside, threw off his backpack and slipped off his shoes, motioning for me to do the same.

“Mom,” he called out, “I’m back and my friend’s here.”

We were soon met by a friendly looking woman with a big smile and dark wavy, shoulder length hair. Nathan looked exactly like her; the resemblance was unmistakable. She looked very young and wore a baggy shirt, with tight fitting shorts and nothing on her feet.

“Hi,” she said excitedly, “so this is the elusive Robert, we finally get to meet you.” She stood with her hands on her hips and looked me up and down.

“It’s Robbie,” I said, as I took off my shoes, “pleased to meet you, Mrs. Elliott.”

It made her laugh. “Ah he’s so cute,” she said to Nathan and I thought I saw her winking at him. He stared back at her, wide eyed and a little embarrassed. “You can call me Karen.”

I smiled uneasily, as Nathan took my backpack.

“Cool,” she said, “come into the living room and make yourself at home. Nathan will get you a drink, won’t you Nathan.” I looked apprehensively at him, as she disappeared into the next room and he gave me a reassuring smile.

“Don’t look so scared,” he whispered and I took a deep breath trying hard to relax.

“I think your mom’s really cool,” I said quietly. I was going to say ‘young’ but stopped myself at the last moment, thinking that it might sound a bit rude.

“That’s my sister, you jerk,” he said and laughed, “that’s so funny, I’m gonna tell her that.”

“NO,” I said, “don’t, I just thought that…well…you’re a dead ringer, you look exactly the same.”

“Yeah dude, she’s my sister, we have the same parents, duh.” He bumped my shoulder playfully and pulled a funny face. “Do I have to explain how human reproduction works?”

“Maybe you can give me a private lesson, sometime?”

“Maybe?”

“What are you too whispering about,” said Karen, poking her head over the top of the couch, as we joined her in a very cluttered looking living room. She was watching TV, but muted it as we walked in. “Come and sit down, you’re making the place look untidy.” She patted the empty seat next to her, but Nathan led me over to one of the armchairs instead, moving a pile of magazines for me to sit down.

“Ignore my sister dude,” he said, “she takes a little getting used to. What do you want to drink?”

“Whatever you got, I’m not fussed, thank you,” I said, trying to be polite.

“I’ll be right back,” he said as he skipped out of the door, “I’ll get my mom.”

I nodded and looked over at Karen who was still staring at me. “I love your accent,” she said, “say something else.”

“Err…what do you want me to say?”

“Cool,” she said excitedly, “so what do you think of Canada?”

“Oh…it’s okay I guess.”

“You don’t sound very convinced, what do you think of Cobourg?” I was trying to think of something nice to say, but she didn’t give me a chance. “Yeah,” she said, “pretty shitty huh?”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

“It’s okay, I know what it’s like, I grew up here, it’s full of old people. They come here to retire.” I had noticed that and I gave a little laugh. “Yeah, you know right? I bet it’s a lot different from where you come from in London?”

“Just a bit,” I said with a smile.

“So you go to Stephenson now,” she said, “that’s a pretty nice school eh.”

“Yes it’s….”

“It’s too bad you couldn’t come to Nathan’s birthday party,” she said, interrupting me again, “it was pretty cool.”

“Yeah, I heard…I couldn’t….”

“Yeah, I know, you were grounded, he told me.” I was starting to wonder what else he had told her; she seemed to know everything about me and I wasn’t overly comfortable with that. “It’s okay,” she said, “Nathan and I are really close, he tells me everything.”

‘Everything’?

She must have noticed the look of panic on my face. “Well…almost everything,” she said, winking at me, as I froze on the chair.

I looked up and was relieved to see Nathan bounding back into the room, followed by a middle aged woman in dress pants and a flowery shirt. She had a warm, friendly face and the family smile. “This is my real mom,” he said, “mom, this is the guy who I was telling you about, Robbie.”

“Hello Robbie,” she said, “we’ve heard all about you. You’re Daniel’s brother right?”

“Adopted brother,” I said, standing up, “pleased to meet you Mrs. Elliott.”

She chuckled and motioned for me to sit back down. “You don’t need to be formal around here Robbie,” she said, “my name’s Elizabeth, but everybody calls me Liz.”

‘Elizabeth; my mom’s name’.

I sat down and stared at the carpet, trying to push away unhappy memories as that dark cloud appeared out of nowhere.

‘She has the same name as my mom; what are the odds of that’?

“What’s up dude?” asked Nathan. He was standing in front of me, with a bottle of water and I looked up to meet his concerned eyes. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, sure,” I said, as I took the drink, but he looked sceptical.

“I hope water’s okay; my dad doesn’t like me drinking pop.”

‘That figures’.

“Come on,” he said, grabbing my arm and lifting me out of the seat. “I want you to meet him, he’s in the kitchen, making dinner…you’re staying for dinner aren’t you?”

“I guess.”

“Of course you are.”

I had told Sue the night before that I was going to a friend’s house straight from school, but despite several probes, I had refused to reveal the name of this friend. She knew full well that there was something going on and I probably wasn’t doing myself any favours by trying to conceal my whereabouts from her, but I had no other believable excuses to fall back on. As always, I had decided to put it off for another day.

“Hello Sir,” I said as I shook the hand of a portly, balding man, with bushy eyebrows and a thin moustache. I decided that Nathan was mostly his mom, but when I saw those familiar big blue eyes looking right through me, it was clear who dad was.

“Nathan’s already told me that you’ve moved over here permanently. Will we be seeing you at the surgery, for a check-up maybe?” he said.

‘He doesn't waste any time’.

“Probably.”

“You have nice teeth Robbie,” said Nathan, peering into my mouth. “Doesn't he dad?” I had already noticed him looking at them, as he shook my hand; I suppose it was difficult for dentists not to do that.

“Hmm,” he said, studying me. I closed my mouth and kept my lips sealed tight to deny him any further views of my pearly whites, but it didn’t stop him from moving closer. “When did you last see a dentist young man?”

I tried to remember, it had been a while ago, back in England, but I had never had any problems with my teeth and never even had to wear a brace. “About six months ago,” I said, but it was probably much longer.

“That’s way too long,” he said.

“Really, but I thought that…?” He was peering into my mouth as I talked, making me nervous, so I clammed up.

“Oh yeah,” he said, “let me just see for a second, it’s probably nothing but.” I reluctantly opened my mouth halfway and looked towards Nathan for help, but he seemed to be equally concerned, as he studied my teeth with his dad. “Oh dear, I’m afraid you need some work done there Robbie.” He had a serious expression and it got me worried.

‘I thought my teeth were in good shape’.

“I do?” I said, as I put my hand up to my mouth.

“Oh yes,” he said, “and it looks quite serious.” He shook his head. “It’s really nothing to worry about, but they’ll have to come out.”

“What do you mean?” I said in horror, “there’s nothing wrong with my teeth.”

“It’s only the front ones from what I can see, but believe me, they’ll need extracting.” He patted me on the arm and smiled at me, but there was no doubting the look of concern on his face. “I’m sorry…we should book you in as soon as possible…maybe next week.”

At first, I thought that he was joking, but the longer it went on and the more serious he became, the more I began to panic.

‘My front teeth, no fucking way, I can’t lose them’.

I felt Nathan’s arm around me and it was comforting even in front of his dad. “It’s okay Robbie,” he said, “he’s really good, aren’t you dad?”

“I haven’t lost anyone yet,” he said, trying to be up-beat, “there’s a lot we can do, dentures, implants.”

‘Dentures, I’m too young for false teeth’?

I used my tongue to feel around my teeth and they didn’t seem to be loose or any different from usual. “Are you sure?” I said and I opened my mouth as wide as I could, to allow him an unrestricted view, in the hope that he had made a mistake.

“What are you doing, leave the poor boy alone, will you?” I closed my mouth as Nathan’s mom marched in and slapped her husband on the arm. “Don’t listen to him sweetie, he does this to everybody,” she said, as she stood between us and then turned around to reprimand him again. “You’re not funny, look, you scared the life out of him.”

I took a deep breath, as I felt the blood return to my face and a sense of relief wash over me. Then I turned my attention to a giggling Nathan and narrowed my eyes at him.

“I’m sorry,” he said, as he held onto my arm, “but you should’ve seen your face, it was so funny.”

“Sorry kid, I couldn’t resist it.” His dad was red faced with laughter and he had to wipe a tear from his eye, as he walked over and put his hand on my shoulder. “There’s nothing wrong with your teeth son, I was only kidding…they look fine.” I offered him a half-hearted smile in return, as he walked away chuckling to himself, past a stern faced Mrs. Elliott.

“I’ll get you back for that,” I whispered to Nathan, with a smile.

“I didn’t say anything,” he protested, tilting his head in wide-eyed innocence. I was captivated buy his darling expression, another one from his seemingly endless repertoire of cute faces that he was able to fall back on. It worked and I forgave him immediately, but I decided that I needed to be a little wary around his dad.

“I had you going there, didn’t I Robbie?” he said, as he went back to work, chopping vegetables.

“A bit.”

“You went as white as a ghost,” said Nathan and I laughed, as his attempt at snatching an olive from the counter, was thwarted by a swift slap on the hand from his mother.

“They’re mean,” she said to her husband, “the poor thing.”

“We have a lot of fun at the surgery,” said his dad, “It’s a scream…I mean literally, you can hear them from the end of the street.” I laughed along with him and Nathan, as his mom rolled her eyes.

“Don’t encourage him dear,” she said, before turning to her son, who was trying to squeeze between her and the counter to open the fridge. “Have you got any homework?”

“No,” he said, “can I offer Robbie a snack?”

“Of course, are you hungry dear,” she asked me, “dinner won’t be ready for a couple of hours.” I shrugged my shoulders. “Nathan can make you a sandwich.”

“See anything you like?” he said suggestively and I couldn’t help laughing, as he struck a ridiculous pose in front of the open fridge. He looked like one of the models from a television game show, standing in front of a brand new car, only he was better looking. It brought a swift rebuke from his mom as she swatted him across the head.

“My son’s a total goofball,” she said, “I’m sure you already know that.”

“Yes,” I said and he frowned at me, as I poked my tongue out at him and pulled a funny face.

“So where’s Daniel,” she asked, “I thought he’d be helping you guys tonight?”

“He’s at home,” I said.

“With Doug,” said Nathan, at the same time.

“He’s at home with Doug,” I compromised as we stared at each other. His mom looked a little perplexed, but his dad chuckled, as he chopped vegetables.

“Daniel always keeps himself busy,” he said, “he’s a good kid, we’ve known him forever, haven’t we Liz?” She agreed and smiled at me. It was Nathan’s smile and it put me at ease.

“Daniel told us that the two of you get on quite well,” she said, “he’s fond of you, so you’re obviously doing something right.” I was thankful for the compliment, but not surprised by it, Daniel and I had bonded very quickly and the feeling was mutual.

“I think that’s mostly down to him,” I admitted in a rare moment of clarity, “he puts up with me.” I think that they were impressed by my honesty and their faces showed familiar strains of sympathy, which I had become used to when discussing my situation. On that particular occasion, we had only skirted around the subject and they steered well clear of the reason why I had moved to Canada in the first place. Nathan or Daniel had no doubt explained my circumstances. It wasn’t necessary anymore, but it was polite and appreciated. I wouldn’t have wanted to talk about it at that time and as always, they were way ahead of the game.

It was clear that even with the gut-wrenching loss of my mom and the awful memories that went with it, still so fresh in my mind, I had a lot to be thankful for and those two boys, along with Fran, had proved to be valuable friends at a difficult and testing time for me. Conversations like those, although tinged with sadness, also served as a reminder to me of how fortunate I was to have these people in my life.

She reached out to touch my arm. “I can’t imagine it was easy at your age to move to another country and a new family and make new friends.”

“Robbie’s already made loads of friends at school, haven’t you?” said Nathan.

“Well, not loads,” I said, “but some, including your son here of course.” I laughed as I saw Nathan pulling a ridiculous face behind his mom and then duck as she tried to hit him with a playful slap. He was full of beans and impossible to ignore, as he bounced around the kitchen making a nuisance of himself, while his mom took over the sandwich making duties. He was fun to watch and my eyes hardly ever left him, but his parents seemed to take his theatrical exuberance in their stride, as if it were normal behaviour for a fifteen-year-old.

“Daniel told me that you’ve got yourself a girlfriend too,” said his dad, “you didn’t waste anytime time there did you?”

“Err.”

“No, he didn’t,” said Nathan, staring at me, “all the girls in school like him.”

“Well not all of them,” I said, uneasily and I gave him a questioning look.

“Don’t embarrass him,” said his mom, as she handed me a cheese sandwich on a plate and retreated to the living room. As soon as she left, Nathan’s dad homed in.

“You’re gonna have to let me know your secret,” he said, leaning across the counter and pretending to whisper, “his mother’s getting a little err...past it now and I’m trying to find someone to have a little fun with, you know what I mean? She doesn’t have to look great. What do you think, can you fix me up with anyone?”

“I don’t think so,” I said, giggling as Nathan rolled his eyes.

“Good luck with that one dad,” he said as he picked up his plate with one hand and grabbed my arm with the other. “Come on, I’ll show you the rest of the house and then we can get started.” I liked the sound of that and I liked his touch, as he led me out of the kitchen and away from his dad.

“You gotta let me know your secret kid,” he shouted after us. “You’ll talk when your in the chair.”

“Your dad’s funny,” I said, “does he always do the cooking?”

“Only at the weekend.”

I was puzzled. “But today’s Wednesday,” I said taking a bite of my sandwich.

“And this is the dining room, where we eat,” he said, as he sat down at a very cluttered table. I took the seat next to him and watched as he shoved the best part of half a sandwich in his mouth and tried to chew on it, nearly choking in the process.

“That’s disgusting,” I said, “I can’t believe you managed to fit it all in.”

“I’ve got a big mouth,” he said, after swallowing down the last bits, “I can fit a lot in it.” He gave me a lop-sided smile and looked away as I stared at his profile.

“I bet,” I said and he turned his head to wink at me.

His house had a slightly odd feel to it, old on the outside, but with a very modern looking interior. It was also a lot bigger than it looked from the street, with large bright rooms and high ceilings.

“Your house is like the Tardis,” I said laughing, as he dragged me into yet another room.

“I know,” he said, “I love Dr. Who.”

‘I knew he would’.

“This is my dad’s study,” he said as we stood in front of a large desk, overflowing with paperwork. There were posters on the wall, with diagrams of teeth and various dental work. “Very boring.”

“So I take it you don’t want to follow your dad and be a dentist?”

“No,” he said, “I couldn’t do that…you know, poking around in people’s mouths all day.”

“Yeah I know, it’s pretty gross.”

We both fell silent and I was searching for something funny or naughty to say, but my wit had deserted me and I think him too. I watched him and smiled, before reaching out and to touch his forearm with my fingertips. He looked nervous as his eyes darted towards the open door and the hallway, from where I could hear his mom and sister talking.

Then I leaned over to kiss him on the lips.

It felt good and seemed to revitalize me, like a shot of adrenaline, as all the emotions from the weekend came flooding back to me. It was what I had missed over the past few days and something that couldn’t be replicated over the phone, in a text, or even on Skype. His warm mouth; moist and inviting, was too much for me to resist, but when I moved forward for more, he gently pushed me away, his eyes turning again towards the nearby voices.

“Not here,” he said.

“I think that you’re cute when you’re scared.”

“I’m not scared; I just don’t want to get caught.”

“I understand,” I said and backed off.

“We can go somewhere else.”

“If you want.”

“I definitely want,” he said and he put his index finger up to my lips, “come on.”

I followed him back into the hallway, where he told me to wait in front of the stairs while he went to talk to his mom in the living room. I heard him asking her if I could go up to his room to help him with his video and she seemed to have no objections, other than telling him to keep the noise down and his door open, which I thought a little odd.

When he re-appeared, he had a huge smile on his face, as he walked over and stood in front of me. “Do you wanna see my room?” he said excitedly.

“Is the Pope catholic?”

He laughed and then lifted each foot to peel off his socks, before running barefoot up the carpeted stairs. I watched, but stayed where I was, unsure if I needed to do the same. He stopped halfway, when he realized that I wasn’t following.

“What are you waiting for?”

“Do I have to take my socks off?” I asked timidly.

He laughed at me. “No silly, come on.” He waited for me to catch him up and then, sure that we were out of sight, grabbed my hand, pulling me behind him. We stopped outside the first door, which faced the stairs. “I just don’t like wearing socks,” he said.

“I’ve noticed,” I said, as I stared unashamedly down at his feet.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I said, lifting my eyes to meet his, “I like your feet, they’re nice.”

“I’d be lost without them,” he said, before realizing what I meant. “Oh…you mean you?”

“I think they’re sexy,” I said, revealing perhaps my most secret of fetishes. Before then, Tom had been the only person to know this of me. “Do you think that’s a little weird?”

“No…well maybe…I dunno,” he said, “everyone to their own I suppose.” Then as he thought about it, his expression changed from surprised to naughty. “But now that I know, I can maybe…you know, go barefoot more often for you.”

“Great.”

“Yeah great,” he said and then he smiled seductively and gave me a quick and unexpected, peck on the lips. “Don’t worry, it’s cool.”

“Can we go inside now?” I said, pointing towards the closed door.

“If you want, but this is only the bathroom,” he said, as he pushed open the door, “where I take a hot bath in the evenings.”

I swallowed hard. “I’m imagining it now,” I said, “but maybe you could show me some day?”

“If you want.” I was surprised by his reply as he grabbed my hand again and walked me to the next door. “Now close your eyes,” he said.

“Why?”

“Go on, close them,” he insisted and I sighed, but did as I was told, before he led me into the room. “Okay you can open them now.”

“Wow! Where did you get all these from?” Every wall was covered in posters, pictures and photographs of every film star, actor and comedian imaginable. It was like an Aladdin’s cave of movie memorabilia from both sides of the Atlantic. I did a slow three-sixty degree turn, taking it all in, open mouthed, like a kid in a sweet shop.

“Do you like?” he asked.

“I love it, it’s just so…so you. And it’s so cool!”

“Same thing,” he said giggling and then he guided me around the room pointing out all the stars who he thought I’d like, most of them British. “Sid James and Kenneth Williams from the Carry-On films, Eric Idle, Rick Mayall, Rowan Atkinson, I love Mr. Bean, he’s really funny.”

“Me too, is that really John Cleese’s signature?”

“Yeah, I met him briefly at a fund-raising event in Toronto and he signed it for me. My dad took me.”

“Wow; you met Monty Python.”

“One of them,” he smiled and grabbed my hand again to lead me around the bed to the far wall. I was getting used to his touch and craved for it whenever he let go, as he excitedly pointed out more of his heroes. “Here’s my Canadian section,” he said, “Leslie Neilson, Mike Myers, Jim Carrey, Dan Aykroyd….”

“Justin Bieber…you’re kidding me?”

“I know,” he said, shyly biting his lip, “he’s not a comedian.”

“He makes me laugh.”

“Shutup, I like him and he’s hot, which is why he’s on the wall,” he said and he squeezed my hand.

I gave him a cheeky smile. “I can’t see any pictures of me up there.”

“Stop pouting, you’ll be up there soon enough and I’ve saved a special spot for you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, right above my bed, so I can look at you when I’m…”

“I get it.”

“Going to sleep,” he finished. “What did you think I was going to say?” I shrugged my shoulders, as he laughed and let go of my hand, walking back around the room to continue the tour. He had a neat model of an old-fashioned camera and tripod on his dresser and two Oscar statuette lamps on nightstands, either side of the bed. “I know they’re tacky, but they were a gift from my sister.”

“It’s a pretty cool bedroom though, you’re very lucky.”

“I Know I am,” he said, looking me in the eye, “and this is my bed.”

It was, as you would expect in a bedroom, the main feature, taking up most of the room and comfortably big enough for two. “I would never have guessed.”

“It’s a queen.”

“Perfect for you then,” I said and laughed as he frowned.

“I was gonna ask you if you wanted to try it out, until that last comment.”

“It’s a lot bigger than mine,” I said, “you must get lonely in there, on your own.”

“it’s a bit harder than yours too,” he said as he sat down and bounced a couple of times.

“I prefer them hard.”

“I know you do sweetie; your one’s a little soft in the middle.”

“Not at the moment it isn’t.” I glanced down helplessly towards my crotch, hoping that it wasn’t too obvious, but even under a baggy t-shirt, it was already more prominent than your average boy bulge and growing by the second.

It made him giggle, as he followed my eyes to study my package for himself, without even a hint shame. The fact that I was more than happy to share this information with him and made no real effort to conceal it from his eager eyes, was perhaps an indication of how far we had come in such a short period of time.

“You’re only making it worse by staring at it,” I said.

“Sorry,” he said, a little sheepishly, “you should sit down, before my mom comes up here to check on us. Do you want me to put some socks on?”

“Ha, maybe you should put a paper bag over your head too, while you’re at it.” I laughed at him. “but it’s not just your feet mate, it’s the whole package, you have this affect on me, I can’t help it. Sorry I don’t mean to be rude.” I took his advice and sat down on a hard backed, wooden chair that faced his desk. It was the only chair in the room and I made good use of it by sitting the wrong way, with my arms folded on the back rest.

“It’s not being rude, I think it’s cool and it’s quite flattering.” He was being serious and he stood up, walking to the door to have a quick look around. “I feel the same you know,” he said, but when I looked, I couldn’t see much evidence of it, “I’m just hiding it better than you.”

‘How does he do it’?

“Can you teach me, because I have a lot of problems in that department and it gets a little embarrassing, if you know what I mean.”

He was blushing, as he walked back over to his bed and sat down facing me. “I wanna do stuff with you Robbie, you know that right?”

“It had crossed my mind,” I said.

“Of course I do, doesn’t everyone?” It reminded me of my conversation with Daniel.

“I don’t think everyone wants to do stuff with me,” I said, “but I get your point.”

“You know what I mean,” he said, “and I want it just as much as you do.” I was glad that I was sitting down when he said that, because my problem suddenly got a whole lot worse and I was even contemplating having to make a quick visit to his bathroom before dinner.

“I doubt if that’s possible.”

“Maybe we should change the conversation, before you paint my walls.” I laughed with him, but it was a few minutes before I realized what he had meant. “You weren’t expecting to do anything today though, were you?” he asked after a long pause.

“No, not with your family here…look Nathan, I’m just happy to be here with you okay. You turn me on, I won’t deny it, you drive me crazy, but it’s much more than that.” I paused and looked down at the floor, trying to find the right words, as he walked over and put his hand on my shoulder. I could see him glancing towards the doorway and I lowered my voice. “I don’t know how to explain how I feel about you, because I’ve never experienced anything like this before. Not even close to it…but I know that it’s more than just wanting to get my hands on your goolies.”

He stood back and laughed, covering his face with his hands, but I couldn’t see what was so funny.

“I’m sorry dude, I don’t mean to laugh, but you can be so funny at times and you don’t even know it.” I stared at him, but it only made him laugh more. “How can you say something so beautiful and then end it with something so crass?”

“Sorry.”

“No, its cool, really,” he said, “I love it, it’s who you are. You’re so sweet.” He stood in front of me and looked down to where I was sitting, before putting his hands on my head, ruffling my hair and pulling me in for a hug. It was a little unconventional, but it worked for me as I willingly buried my face in his chest. I breathed in his musky scent, which after a long day at school, was clearly distinguishable from the sweet smell of his t-shirt and began planting kisses on his torso through a thin layer of clothing.

I think I might have hit the right spot, because he pulled me up by my arms and pushed me back against the wall. My eyes stayed with him, as he twisted his head, closed his eyes and leaned forward to kiss me. When we parted for air, our bodies were pressed together, my leg was between his, with my thigh against his crotch. His face looked flushed and no doubt I was worse, as we smiled helplessly and chuckled.

“This is so cool,” he said, “I’ve never done anything like this before…not even close. Thank you so much.”

Our eyes met only momentarily as we studied each another in detail, perhaps feeling comfortable up close for the first time. I stuck out my tongue to touch the end of his nose, before kissing his forehead as he looked up and beamed a sensual smile, his wide eyes filled with expression and dare I say, love. I squeezed him tighter and gently rubbed my thigh between his legs, which made his eyes open even wider. “No,” I said, “I should be thanking you, for saving me from a lifetime of heterosexual hell. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, I mean it.”

He looked at total peace with himself as he half closed his eyes and pressed his spongey lips into mine with gusto, this time our kiss was a lot more forceful and I could feel his hand on the back of my head and his fingers in my hair. He moaned as his tongue explored my mouth and I could feel his hardness against mine. It was passionate and heated, but he was a more than willing participant, as his gyrated his tiny frame between me and the wall. I felt his leg wrap around mine and then in perhaps the boldest move of all, he lifted my t-shirt to slide a hand underneath, clawing at my back and grabbing my flesh with his fingers as if his life depended on it.

There was a loud knock on the door frame and a deliberate cough.

We both jumped and my heart missed a beat as we momentarily froze, before franticly trying to pull apart like scared rabbits. It wasn’t easy, we had tied a pretty good knot and it took a couple of seconds of sheer mayhem in order to free ourselves from one another and put some space between us. All the time I was in full on panic mode and as I turned to face whoever it was who stood in the doorway, I imagined the worst. His mom, his dad, his sister, all three of them, Don, Sue, Nicola, Daniel even. I cringed, expecting to be shamed, thrown out and banished from the Elliott household, perhaps for good.