The Cockney Canuck - 48. Chapter 48 We're not in Love

“Oh my God…I knew it; I just knew it.” It was his sister, Karen, standing with her hand over her mouth but she was alone. “I knew there was something going on, I could tell,” she said. Nathan and I looked at one another and then stared back at her in disbelief. It wasn’t what I was expecting to hear and I waited for the inevitable backlash. “How long have you two…? This is so exciting.” She was surprised, shocked even, but she wasn’t angry and I couldn’t understand why that was. I had been caught snogging her baby brother; I certainly wasn’t expecting her to be happy about it.

“Karen…what’s up?” said a startled and red-faced Nathan, as we tried to smooth down our ruffled clothing and straighten out our hair. It almost made me laugh.

‘Great choice of words, Nathan’.

She resisted what was surely an open invitation to make a joke out of it, although her expression made it clear that she was reading from the same page. I could see her looking down and smiling at our fumbled attempts to hide our erections under baggy t-shirts.

“I just knew it, you know,” she said, “it was so obvious.” She seemed happy; almost jubilant at her discovery and she beamed a smile at me, before turning to her brother and frowning. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was going to tell you, honestly,” he said. I turned to look at him; surprised by his statement.

‘You were’?

“How can you go and try to keep all this from me?” she said, tripping over her words in the rush to get them out. “This is so exciting…I can’t believe you’re together…I’m so pleased. My brother’s got a boyfriend and a cute one too.” She stood in front of me and studied my face, I was blushing and sweating, but did my best to smile back at her, before dropping my eyes to the floor in embarrassment.

‘She’s crazy’.

“Look at me Rob,” she said.

“Robbie.”

“Oh my God, you’re so sweet,” she said, as if she hadn’t been expecting me to talk. Then, she made me jump by throwing her arms around my neck, and hugging me tight. I turned my head towards my chuckling partner, pleading for help, and thanking the heavens that my boner had long since died. “Nathan told me that you were cute.”

“Karen!” said Nathan curtly. She let go of me, and I instinctively took a step backwards. I must have looked a little frightened, but it only made her laugh.

“Don’t be scared,” she said, “I don’t bite.” I remembered Nathan, saying the same thing earlier in jest, but now I wasn’t so sure, she certainly looked capable enough. “My brother, was convinced that you were straight, but I could tell that he really liked you and he never stops talking about you.”

“Don’t, you’re embarrassing me,” said Nathan, and he ran his fingers through his hair as he tried to avoid my curious look. He couldn’t prevent a tight-lipped smile from creeping across his face though, and together with those dimples, and wild eyes, it made me want to love him more than ever. Karen and I, sighed in unison, as we watched him taking the word cute to new levels.

“It’s okay,” I said finally, “most people, still think that I’m straight.”

“And that’s how we want it to stay,” added Nathan.

“Bro, you do know that I’m not gonna say anything, right?” said Karen. He nodded and I relaxed a bit. He was right about her, she did take a bit of getting used to, but she was growing on me fast. “But I’m gonna want the lowdown,” she added, “we don’t keep secrets from each other, do we Nathan?”

“Sometimes,” he mumbled, but she ignored him, as she settled on his bed sitting crossed legged, with a fixed grin across her face. It didn’t seem as if we were going to get anymore alone time, but at least I wasn’t being kicked out into the street.

“So you’re gay now right?” she said pointing at me. Nathan and I moved our heads simultaneously towards each other to share a blank look, before turning back to her. It was difficult to see how she could have reached any other conclusion. When she walked in, I was only a few layers of clothing away from having full on sex with him. “I guess that’s kinda obvious.”

“You think,” said Nathan, sarcastically.

“Okay you guys,” she said, “I wanna know everything, come and sit down.” She patted the bed with both hands, and we slowly idled over to sit either side of her, while she got us to update a story that she had apparently been following for some time. There wasn’t much to say that she didn’t already know, but she was surprised when we told her that we had only been dating for less than a week.

“If you’re like this after just one week? At this rate you’ll be glued together after a month. Shit, why can’t I meet someone like that?” I found the thought of being glued to Nathan, actually quite appealing, but then, she came over all serious and it was obvious that she was preparing herself for a little older sister advice. “Are you having sex?”

“Geez Karen…no of course not,” said Nathan, “talk about blunt.”

“You knew I would ask you that though,” she said, “but it’s cool, and it’s what I wanted to hear, you’re way too young for that stuff.”

“Robbie’s nearly sixteen,” said Nathan, and he sounded hopeful, as if he was trying to get her permission. His enthusiasm was music to my ears, but I had already anticipated her response.

“I don’t care, it’s still too young. You’ve only just met, don’t ruin it by jumping into bed, before you even get a chance to get to know each other. I mean, I’m not sure that I’m all that comfortable with what you were doing when I walked in.”

“We were only kissing,” said Nathan.

“Oh yeah, and the rest,” she said, before giving us an impish grin that was so Nathan. “Although I have to admit, you did look kinda hot together.”

“You’re not supposed to say things like that,” he said, pulling a disapproving face, “you’re my sister.”

I was a little confused by her unexpected ‘U’ turn, and she seemed to be caught somewhere between a responsible older sibling, and an excitable teenager, hungry for gossip. She was swinging like a pendulum.

“What were you guys thinking?” she demanded, “you were so lucky it was me who came up here to spy on you, and not mom or dad.”

“You were spying on us, that’s not fair?” said Nathan.

“What do mean it’s not fair, of course it’s fair, I had to find out.” He was smiling and still looking a little dishevelled, as he combed his hair with his fingers for the umpteenth time, and looked over his eyes at her. She put an arm around him and squeezed him towards her, and then tilted her head to rest on top of his. “You know how much I love you, bro,” he nodded, “and I’m totally cool with this, so you don’t have to hide anything from me. I’m not mom and dad.”

It was clear that we had been a little fortunate, although she did admit to sneaking up on us, and I wanted to believe that we probably would have heard his parents coming up the stairs. However, we were still caught, and even though she was cool about it, it was embarrassing nevertheless.

‘If it was Nicola, who walked in on us, then it would have reached China by now’.

Nathan had told me that he was very close to his sister and now I was able to witness it first-hand. It was cool to watch their little moment together, but it felt as if I was encroaching on something very personal. I looked away, before deciding to move and give them some space. As I went to stand up though, I felt a forceful hand on my knee, pushing me back down.

“You too sweetie,” she said, turning her attention towards me. “I guess you really like my brother eh?” She took hold of my hand and held it in her lap.

“Yes, of course.”

‘Can’t you tell’?

“And I know how much he likes you, because you’re all he ever talks about…to me anyway.” I could hear Nathan groaning, but it brought a smile to my lips, which Karen seemed to like. I watched her smiling back at me, from the corner of my eye. “You can trust me okay? I’m on your side, and I think you’re totally adorable together.” She let go of my hand, to ruffle my hair. “Oh my God, you really know how to blush, don’t you?” I could feel my cheeks burning, and Nathan giggling at my uncomfortable disposition.

“You’re making him worse,” said Nathan, “leave him alone, he’s not a toy…and if he is, then I’m the only one allowed to play with him,” his voice trailed off, but his words made me smile, and bubble inside. It was true; he had a monopoly over me, and I would have allowed him to do whatever he wanted.

“Well, you’re not going to play with him while I’m here,” she said, “and you’re going to have to think of way to tell mom and dad.” I began to panic; we had a lucky escape, but telling parents, definitely wasn’t part of my agenda.

“I’m not going to tell mom and dad,” he said, “not yet anyway.”

‘Not ever’!

“Why not? They’ll find out soon enough. I won’t say anything, but you guys aren’t going to be able to keep this from them. You’re too…too…well just look at yourselves in the mirror.”

Oddly enough, for someone so picture perfect and always concerned about his appearance, Nathan didn’t seem to have a mirror in his room. There was no space left on the walls for a start. We leaned forward to look at each other instead, but I couldn’t see anything in Nathan’s expression that would necessarily give us away, and probably him neither.

Nathan looked curiously at his sister, and raised his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“Oh my God, you two just look so…you know?”

“What?”

“So…in love.”

I thought that Nathan’s eyes were going to pop out of his head, and he opened his mouth wide in an exaggerated show of shock. I was getting used to his theatrical expressions, and I wasn’t sure how much of this was acting. I didn’t think that he was actually in love with me, but I got the feeling that he didn’t want to admit how much he liked me either.

“We’re not in love!” he said, standing up in a show of defiance. “Are we?” He looked across at me, trying to keep a straight face and expecting me to back up his statement, but I kept him waiting just long enough for him to get nervous.

“No, of course not,” I said with a smirk, although it certainly would have explained away a lot of the weird feelings that I was getting, and why I was unable to go more than a few minutes without thinking about him in some way or another. “We don’t even know each other that well.”

“You had me fooled,” she said, and she did have a point, we were chewing each others faces off just a few minutes earlier. “But seriously guys, I’m not suggesting that you’re ready for marriage or anything.”

‘Marriage! Is that even possible’?

“But you do look like a couple, and you look as if you like each other, in a way that you obviously do. I noticed it when you first walked in.” I was waiting for her to continue. I needed to know what was giving us away, so that I could put it right, before the whole world noticed. Nathan sat back down, looking as if he was ready to accept her vague explanation, but I wanted something more specific.

“What did you notice, we’re not acting any different now from what we were a month ago?” It was a bold statement, and Nathan gave me a quizzical look. “Well…maybe when we’re alone, but not in front of anyone else.”

“I can’t explain what it is, and you probably don’t even know that your doing it, but when you look at each other—and that’s all the time, by the way—it’s not the kind of look that friends give each other. Not even best friends. Do you understand what I’m trying to say?”

“I guess,” I mumbled, staring at the carpet. It did kind of make sense, but I had no idea how we were going to be able to rectify the problem.

‘How can I stop doing something, if I don’t even know that I’m doing it’?

“Maybe we should just stop looking at each other then?” said Nathan. He was being sarcastic, and a little shirty, which I hadn’t heard from him before, but just hearing him say those words, was difficult to bear. There was no way that it would have been possible to have lasted more than a minute in the same room, without balling each other out, and to prove my point, I looked straight towards him.

“Look you two, I don’t want to spoil anything for you, but it’s something that you should definitely think about,” she said. “Mom and dad won’t mind…well they will, because they’ll think that you’re too young, but they’ll get over it. They’ll have to. But you need to tell them, before they find out like I did. It makes sense, you have nothing to lose.”

‘Except my teeth maybe, if your crazy dad thinks I’m after his son’.

“Okay, so they probably won’t allow Robbie to sleepover like Daniel, and they’ll try to sit between you on the couch, but they did the same when I was your age, to me and my boyfriend.”

“Which one?” said Nathan. We both laughed, but his cheek got him a slap on the arm from his sister.

“All of them,” she said with a smile, before looking at me. “It’s not as if we could get up to very much with him around. When mom and dad went out, I had to babysit my little brother, and he was hard work. He was a manic child; so hyperactive, and he wouldn’t sleep. There’s a nine-year gap between us, so when I was sixteen, he was only seven, and when I put him to bed, he would sneak back downstairs, and jump all over me.”

“He hasn’t changed much then,” I said, and laughed. I was unable to resist a joke, but Nathan felt the need to plead innocence to his sister, which made it even funnier.

It was obvious that she wasn’t going to leave us alone, until we agreed to at least give her suggestion some thought, and in the end, we both accepted that it was the best way forward, although I had no intention of actually following it through.

“Do you want to show me this video then,” I said, breaking an uneasy silence and trying to change the subject. It was after all, the reason I was there in the first place, and I didn’t think that Karen would want to hang around once we went to work on something other than each other.

“What video?” said Nathan.

“The one that you wanted me to help edit, duh.”

“Err…oh yeah…that video. Well the thing is dude, it’s not quite finished yet. You see I still need to do a little more work on it before it’s ready.”

“There is no video, is there?” I said, and he hunched his shoulders offering me an apologetic smile.

“No.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, I made that up.”

“Oh, so what did you wanna do instead?”

Karen rolled her eyes. “He wanted to jump you, dummy.”

“Stoppit!” he said, and he gave her a shove, pushing her into me. “I did not.” I looked over and smiled at him, to let him know that if that had been his plan, then I wouldn’t have objected, but I guess that he already knew that. “Like we’re really gonna be able to do that with mom and dad in the house.”

“Well you were half way there earlier. I guess those hormones are starting to kick in now, huh?” She ruffled his hair, and he pushed her hand away.

“It probably looked worse than it was,” he said, “Robbie came over so that we could spend some time together, you know, alone. In private, without everybody watching and judging us. We weren’t planning on having sex or anything.”

“I don’t think that either of us are really ready to take that kind of step yet Karen,” I said quietly, “this is all quite new to us, we want to take it slowly.”

“Ah, you’re so sweet,” she said, patting me on the knee, “and so grown up. I know I can trust you with my baby brother.” I smiled coyly at her, but I could see Nathan glaring at me from behind. “And I can take a hint too, so I’ll leave you two alone, to get some of that editing done.”

‘Yeah, that editing’.

She put her arms around our shoulders, and pulled us both in for a kind of group hug, before getting up to leave. “I still can’t believe you two found each other in this shithole,” she said, as she walked across the room, “that’s just so cool.” I heard her walk away, but a few seconds later, she appeared again around the door frame. “Remember what I said?” We both nodded, as Nathan got up, and pushed her along the hall.

“Go already!” he said, and I laughed, probably more out of relief than anything else.

“I can’t believe that,” I said, when he returned, “we were so lucky.”

“We’re not ready for anything like that, Karen,” he mimicked me in a childish sing-song voice. “This is all new to me, we want to take it slowly. You’re such a bullshitter sometimes.” He laughed and shook his head.

“I was trying to save your bacon,” I said, “she thinks that you’re trying to molest me.”

“I know and she thinks that you’re all sweet and innocent.”

“But I am,” I insisted, as I lifted my legs, and stretched out on his bed, staring at the ceiling and laughing, as I noticed his Laurel and Hardy light shade.

“Hardly, but it’s probably best that she thinks that. She wouldn’t like it if she knew that you’ve been trying to get into my pants for weeks.”

“That’s not quite true,” I said, “I’ve been trying for much longer than that.” He poked his tongue out at me. “And doing things like that, will only encourage me to try even harder.”

I rolled onto my front, and buried my face in his pillow, taking in deep breaths of his scent. “What are you doing,” he said, as he stood over me.

“I like your bed; it smells of you.” I lifted my head to smile at him.

“Don’t,” he said, “the sheets haven’t been changed in a while, you’ll probably pass out.”

“Hmmm, even better,” I said and pulled his duvet over my face. “What do you wear in bed?”

“Nothing,” he said predictably, and in a sultry voice.

“I thought as much.” I gave a little moan, as I slowly pushed my groin into his mattress a few times, and waited for his response.

“Oh my God you’re so disgusting.” He leaned over and slapped me hard on the butt.

“Ouch, what was that for?” I said, rolling over to face him.

“You were humping my bed,” he said, before turning away and mumbling, “and I weren’t even in it.”

“I heard that,” I said, sitting up and smiling at him.

“I think you should get out of my bed, before my mom comes up to check on us. And I warn you now, she’s not as easy-going as my sister.” I was sure that he was right about that, and realizing that it probably wouldn’t look good, I stood up and straightened out his duvet.

“I wasn’t inside your bed anyway,” I said quietly, “but I wouldn’t mind trying it out.”

“I’m working on it,” he said, and I snapped my head towards him, but he was already looking away.

“Blimey, is that you?” I was holding up a photograph of Nathan and his sister, when they were younger; it was in a silver frame and took pride of place on his nightstand.

‘They must be close if he keeps a picture of her by his bed. I wouldn’t keep a picture of Nicola, period, but then she’s not really my sister either’.

“I was nine and she was eighteen.”

“Well you both look really cute,” and I meant it. Even at that age, Nathan was already looking like a boy model, and Karen was a very hot looking teenager. I mentioned this to him as I studied the photograph.

“Keep away from her dude,” he said playfully, “I know that you have a soft spot for girls.”

“I’m not after your sister,” I said, “but even I can see that she’s a real looker.”

“And you thought that she was my mom.”

“That was embarrassing,” I said, as I put the photograph back. “Don’t ever tell her I said that.”

“Don’t worry, I will,” he said.

“Sue’s got a picture of me in the nude, you know.”

“No way,” he said, as his eyes lit up, “what’s the joke?”

“It’s not a joke, honestly, even Nicola’s seen it.”

“Can I see it?”

“If you want, I’ll show it to you, next time you come over.”

“What about the photograph?” he teased and I laughed.

“Yeah, that too and there’s another one of me in the bath with Daniel.”

“Aren’t you the lucky one; so how old were you at the time?” he twigged.

“Four, I think…oh and I had my back to the camera…still interested?”

“Not anymore,” he said, “got any more recent porn?”

“No,” I said, as memories of a bad lack of judgement at Alex’s house, flooded my brain, making me sweat.

“We’ll have to put that right,” he said, as he settled into the chair by his desk, and finally turned on his computer. Then he reached up to the shelf above him, which was stacked with DVD’s, and retrieved a cool looking camera. I guessed that it was his birthday present, and he aimed it towards me. “Say cheese.”

“Bollocks,” I said, as he captured me, pulling a silly face.

“Don’t, I want a nice one of you.” He clicked again and then once more, as I struck a more serious pose. “That’ll do for now, but I warn you, I’m gonna want you on film too.”

“I can hardly wait,” I said, “will you be in it too?”

“No, I have to do the filming.”

“But I’m no good on my own.”

“Well, if we use the tripod, then maybe I can join in for a bit, if you want?”

“I can’t wait, so when do we start shooting?”

“Not until the end,” he said and it took me a few seconds to catch up.

“The money shot?” I said, and we fell about laughing.

* * * * *

Dinner was a fairly informal affair, which was a relief to me, and Mr. Elliott proved to be a more than capable cook. He bombarded us with his brash humour and sometimes predictable jokes, but after falling for his prank earlier, I was pleased that he left me alone. He was a character, and Nathan was clearly very fond of him, but I found it difficult to feel comfortable in his company, and I definitely wasn’t too keen on having him as my dentist.

I got to sit next to Nathan, whose subtler humour, was more aligned to my own and although I tried my best not to look at him too often, and resist the temptation to bump elbows, it was difficult. He decided at one point, to raise the stakes and my body temperature even further, by engaging in a little footsie with me under the table. It had me reaching for some water, and brought a curious look from Karen, who sat opposite, smiling, and moving her eyes between the pair of us with interest. I got the feeling that she was able to read us like a book, but her friendly face made a nice change from the threatening, and often hostile looks that I was used to getting from Nicola. When I first felt his barefoot covering my sock, as he reached for the potatoes, I thought it was an accident, but he kept it there to gently massage the top of my foot. I wasn’t expecting him to be so brazen in front of his family, even though they had no idea what was happening, but I enjoyed it nevertheless and even moved my leg, to make it easier for him.

Nathan’s parents were nice too; we talked quite a bit at the table, which was mostly me answering the regular questions. I was polite, and stayed with the plan, explaining about the new video editing software that I had learned about only the day before. I wasn’t sure if they actually believed this excuse for my visit, but they never questioned us either. Karen rolled her eyes at us when Nathan asked if we could go upstairs to finish off, but there was nothing in his mom’s tone that suggested that they suspected any foul play, and we were allowed back to his room, unhindered.

There was still a couple of hours left before I had to leave, and we spent these watching DVD’s of classic English comedy shows, on his computer. We even shared his bed, on top of it of course. He was lying sideways across it on his stomach, while I sat upright, next to him, leaving plenty of room between us. After coming so close to being discovered earlier, I don’t think that either of us wanted to take any more chances. Our luck was bound to run out at some point and I didn’t want to test it any further. We weren’t completely lame though; it would have been unbearable to have been so close to him, without some kind of intimacy, so touching became the new kissing. He initiated it by reaching out to hold my hand during an episode of Mr. Bean and I responded a little later by gently rubbing his back through his t-shirt. He obviously enjoyed it, because he closed his eyes and had a huge smile on his face, as he rested his head on his folded arms. It was like stroking a cat and I’m sure I could hear him purring, even above the sound of Spike Milligan and Peter Sellers.

After a while Karen, predictably joined us upstairs, but this time, as she carefully peeked around the door, and coughed loudly, we were watching a collection of clips from the ‘Carry On’ films. I don’t think that it was quite her thing, because she didn’t find it all that funny, but we were in stitches throughout, even though we had both seen the same clips, dozens of times before. She had come up to offer me a lift home, and point out the time to us.

“It’s half-past eight, and mom thinks that you should probably be getting home,” she said, “we don’t want to be responsible for you being grounded again.” Nathan protested, asking for another hour, but I knew that she was right, and I wanted to make certain that I got home well before my ten o’clock weekday curfew. I was sure that I would be interrogated the moment I got back, but as long as I stayed within their rules, there wasn’t a lot they could do, so I took up Karen’s offer.

“Sorry Nathan, but your sister just offered me a ride,” I said, thinking that she had gone back downstairs. The joke backfired though, when she walked back into the room, as I was dodging a slap from her brother.

“Your boyfriend’s a little cheeky isn’t he?” she said to Nathan, who found it quite amusing that I had been caught. “Maybe if you were ten years older sweetie.” I blushed and looked to him for help.

“Karen!”

“Okay,” she said, “five years older.” I smiled back at her as Nathan shook his head.

“Don’t encourage him Karen,” he said, “and if you’re giving him a ride home, then I’m coming with you.”

“What, don’t you trust me with your boyfriend?” she teased.

“No,” he said, “it’s him I don’t trust.” He was joking though, and he made sure that I knew it by walking over and giving me a gentle kiss on the lips, right in front of his sister.

I asked her to stop a little way from the house, and I think that she understood why, as she leaned over towards the back seat, and gave me a warm hug and a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

“That’s something you’re gonna have to get used to with our family,” she said, “we’re very affectionate. But I guess you’ve found that out already.” She winked at me and I was already blushing, as I turned towards Nathan, and then back at his sister. “Okay guys, but make it quick.” She sat back down in her seat to face the other way, and turned up the radio, as I looked at Nathan, and licked my lips invitingly at him. He giggled and after a quick look to make sure Karen wasn’t looking, threw his arms around my neck, and kissed me hard on the lips.

We were finally interrupted by Karen. “Okay boys, break, stop now. Geez don’t you two ever come up for air?” We parted, breathing deeply, and giggling. Even in the dim light, Nathan’s face was bright red. I kissed him on the forehead and pushed him playfully back in his seat, laughing.

“Oh my God, you two are so cute together, you know that?” said Karen, “this is so cool, really it is and I’m so excited for the both of you.” Then she leaned over from the driver’s seat, and pulled us both in for another of her makeshift group hugs, kissing us on the cheek, and squeezing us tight.

“Karen, your crushing me,” said Nathan, and she very nearly toppled on top of us, as it quickly turned into a bit of a wrestling match.

“Can you help me up please,” she said and we grabbed an arm each, laughing as we pushed her unceremoniously back to the front. “Okay, it wasn’t that funny,” but it was a comical end to an unforgettable evening.

I got out, walked around the car, and leaned in for one more quick peck on the lips from an eager Nathan, as Karen rolled her eyes at us. “Thank you Karen, nice meeting you,” I said, “see you tomorrow Nathan.”

“Nice meeting you too cutie,” she said, “I suppose we’ll be seeing a lot of you now?” She didn’t wait for my answer, as the car lurched forward into a ‘U’ turn and sped off down the road.

‘Wow, what the fuck just happened there? That was mad. Nathan is so sexed up; I can’t believe it. He’s all over me, how did that happen? Maybe I am in love with him? Is that what this feeling is? That’s crazy, we’ve only just started going out. I like him a lot, that’s all. A very lot! A very, big lot! And I love his sister too, she is so cool. Why can’t I have a sister like her, instead of Nicola’?

Despite her incessant talking, I was in awe of Karen. She obviously had a special kinship with Nathan, which went way beyond the usual sibling bonds. Even though we had only just met, I felt that I could trust her, and considered her an important ally in the battles, which I was certain we would soon have to face.