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    Parker Owens
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Disasters, Delights and Other Detours - 22. Four Varied Skyscrapers

Four 'skyscraper' poems, written at widely spaced intervals.

One.

Intimate
details' descriptions aren't
needed to understand firmly our
magic connection, a bond we established the
moment our wandering eyes met that
marvelous evening you
danced to me.

 

Two.


Why is it
when I write a blessing
each word in the dictionary flees?
They hide under shrubs and run into deep thickets
where shadows and thorns obscure my view,
and beguiling birds sing
sweet love songs.

 

Three.

I exist
halfway twixt truth and myth,
between the magical and the mundane;
a high, clear vantage point for the storyteller,
but an inhospitable dwelling
with no walls and many
wide windows.

 

Four.

In a mood
to confess my misdeeds,
I bend my head and recount each wrong;
my transgressions make my heart and hand heavier,
fingers fumbling with faulted phrases
for trouble and trespass
and pardon.

AC Benus taught me this form. I am in his debt. I will be in yours, too, for your comments.
Copyright © 2017 Parker Owens; All Rights Reserved.
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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  • Site Administrator

I like all of these, but number one stands out to me.  Interesting form. Nicely done, as always :) 

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This 'skyscraper' form is fantastic, Parker. I will have to try my hand at it sometime. These little beauties you created are exceptional as individual pieces as well as a group. Each one is very thoughtful. 

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These are interesting to write ... i've used this form before also. 

 

all of them are wonderful but  i like 3. 

 

xo

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All are wonderful, Parker, but I must admit Two was my favorite, because it made me smile. Well done, as always. :hug: 

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I like these Parker. It's an interesting form. I like Four in particular. Perhaps because it's Lent and I am in a confessional mood.

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9 hours ago, Valkyrie said:

I like all of these, but number one stands out to me.  Interesting form. Nicely done, as always :) 

These grew over time. It is interesting how the form has insinuated itself into my thinking. It is often  good to think of these musically, in 3/4 time. Thank you for reading these, and for your comments.

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8 hours ago, MacGreg said:

This 'skyscraper' form is fantastic, Parker. I will have to try my hand at it sometime. These little beauties you created are exceptional as individual pieces as well as a group. Each one is very thoughtful. 

 

I am glad you like the form; thank AC for it. You are sure to create something wonderful with it, I know. Thank you for your kind words about these; I am very grateful. 

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7 hours ago, Mikiesboy said:

These are interesting to write ... i've used this form before also. 

 

all of them are wonderful but  i like 3. 

 

xo

 

It's a fun form to work with. I am glad you liked the meditation on being a storyteller. The images definitely worked for me, too. Thank you so very much for reading these. 

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7 hours ago, Headstall said:

All are wonderful, Parker, but I must admit Two was my favorite, because it made me smile. Well done, as always. :hug: 

 

I'm happy that number two made you smile. I seem be able to get word blocked and tongue tied so easily sometimes. Thanks for reading these; I am very grateful.

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1 minute ago, Parker Owens said:

 

It's a fun form to work with. I am glad you liked the meditation on being a storyteller. The images definitely worked for me, too. Thank you so very much for reading these. 

fun, but harder than they appear to get right ... yours are lovely ..  

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7 hours ago, dughlas said:

I like these Parker. It's an interesting form. I like Four in particular. Perhaps because it's Lent and I am in a confessional mood.

 

You found my Lenten mood in number four right away. It is a somber poem, but it was eminently satisfying to write.Thanks very much for your thoughts. I really appreciate them. 

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Just now, Mikiesboy said:

fun, but harder than they appear to get right ... yours are lovely ..  

 

You're surely right about that. I stumbled around with the form for a long time. 

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59 minutes ago, Defiance19 said:

Beautifully done, Parker. I loved each one. 

 

Thank you, Def. you are most kind. 

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For me the magic of One is the tension building to a crescendo on the final three beats. "Danced to me" just resolves everything as effortlessly as a sigh. Beautiful.  

 
Two seems to be about the man vs nature theme, but you sharpen it with the opening question, thereby dragging poor God into it. It's an interesting juxtaposition, and succeeds by being subtle. It's pensive. 
 
Three. The poet in his glass house; it's an image that I can relate to. I've written a few times about the loneliness of an observer, of the one who is part and yet removed from life at the same time. 
 
Four reminds me why I write. Part of it is a chance to relive past events and get them right. In its way, writing verse is painful because we must conjure our shortcomings to compose our way around them. This piece makes me remember that we poets are tough; many people spend a lifetime denying they have anything to answer for. Thank you for that. 
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3 minutes ago, AC Benus said:

For me the magic of One is the tension building to a crescendo on the final three beats. "Danced to me" just resolves everything as effortlessly as a sigh. Beautiful.  

 
Two seems to be about the man vs nature theme, but you sharpen it with the opening question, thereby dragging poor God into it. It's an interesting juxtaposition, and succeeds by being subtle. It's pensive. 
 
Three. The poet in his glass house; it's an image that I can relate to. I've written a few times about the loneliness of an observer, of the one who is part and yet removed from life at the same time. 
 
Four reminds me why I write. Part of it is a chance to relive past events and get them right. In its way, writing verse is painful because we must conjure our shortcomings to compose our way around them. This piece makes me remember that we poets are tough; many people spend a lifetime denying they have anything to answer for. Thank you for that. 

 

And now I am doubly in your debt for this amazing commentary and review. I am humbled, yet delighted these engaged you. Of the four, number one, with its insistent 3/4 beat, sang to me the most. Numbers two and three lent themselves to the joy of hunting for the right images. Your thoughts on number four struck a deep chord with me; you made me recall how I often conjure my errors and faults to exorcise them. 

 

Thank you so much for this! 

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This form is new to me. Novelty adds interest. The shape <<<>>> suggests flow and ebb. Looking at these in terms of prose, with periods in place of line breaks, the shape suggests increasing and decreasing pace, and I feel that in 2, 3, & 4. This pattern of pace can imply an increasing intensity <<==<<, tentative-flowing-pesado. I feel that in 1 & 4. Counting syllables in threes is great for analysis, and it actually fits poem 1(:worship:), but for the others it leads to meaningless syncopation, and I would rather let the beats flow wild. I relate best to 3, and to your list of betweens, I would add between now and then. The image of windows without walls is fun. 3 & 4 present discomfort. Is suffering an essential ingredient of poetry? 

Edited by knotme
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Number 2 made me grin. It's always when you have to write something that your vocabulary melts away. Words do indeed hide in shrubs😛  3 I found a magical way of describing us writers, and yes, we do leave ourselves wide open, like the windows. Thank you for introducing me to this form.  :) 

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13 hours ago, northie said:

Number 2 made me grin. It's always when you have to write something that your vocabulary melts away. Words do indeed hide in shrubs😛  3 I found a magical way of describing us writers, and yes, we do leave ourselves wide open, like the windows. Thank you for introducing me to this form.  :) 

 

This can be a very expressive form, worth exploring and experimenting with. Thanks so much for reading these. Each had a different genesis; number one in rhythm, two in frustration, three in metaphor, four in sorrow. 

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