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    Parker Owens
  • Parker Owens
  • Author
  • 02/08/2016
  • 173 Words
  • 1,368 Views
  • 14 Comments
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Occasional Poetry - 15. Zander and Andy

em>With many thanks to AC for his comments and patience.
Written in response to Poetry Prompt 7: Blank Verse
Andy Watches Zander in School
 

You move with fluid grace in all you do.

Intently through the crowds of faceless ones

who populate the halls you stalk your way.

I am your prey, you must not see my face

nor yet my clothes, lest anything betray

intelligence of where I live in school.

For in your pleasure you could lie in wait,

to pounce and rend me into pieces fine.

You'd feast upon my fear, but as you chew

a moment's happiness I'd know: it's you.

 
 
Zander Watches Andy Sleep
 
I watched you breathe last night; the moon came out
and filtered through the curtained windowpane.
Your shoulder blade moved millimeters breadth;
each easy cadenced sigh a subtle shift.
A shadow so defined invited me
to kiss and linger there. And yet I feared
to wake you, lest I scar your holy sleep,
unmarred by demons, nightmares from your hell.
And hell enough to leave untouched your skin
when I would love, enfold you, pull you in.
em>All mistakes are my own. Thank you for reading.
Copyright © 2017 Parker Owens; All Rights Reserved.
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  • Love 1
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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Chapter Comments

AC Benus

Again, you amaze me with your metre. You are going for the smoothness and consistency of the great poets who reveled in it – like Dryden and Pope!

I really like reading flawless metre in Blank Verse storytelling, like you have here. If I can, I'd love to sway you to considering a longer project. Just a wonderful poem, telling a tale in Blank Verse. I think you would astound all of us with its quality.

Bravo!

Edited by AC Benus
  • Like 1
Parker Owens
On 02/11/2016 04:51 AM, AC Benus said:

Again, you amaze me with your metre. You are going for the smoothness and consistency of the great poets who reveled in it – like Dryden and Pope!

 

I really like reading flawless metre in Blank Verse storytelling, like you have here. If I can, I'd love to sway you to considering a longer project. Just a wonderful poem, telling a tale in Blank Verse. I think you would astound all of us with its quality.

 

Bravo!

Your words are most kind and generous. These characters meant a lot to me, so this one flowed simply and easily. You suggest something longer for another project; I'd like that. Still, I think it will take time to develop in my mind before I start...and there is so much poetry to write! Thanks again.

  • Love 1
northie

A pair of poems whose contrasting views are both different yet somehow complimentary, and very affecting.

 

Andy's fear and insecurity permeate almost the whole of the first poem while Zander is portrayed as a panther: sinuous, graceful, dangerous, and magnetically attractive. And yet, Andy does allow his love to win in a strange, slightly macabre way.

 

The anxious, hunted tone of before is replaced in the second poem by calm, tenderness, loving consideration. The peaceful joy of watching a loved one sleep is beautifully portrayed – even more so when that sleep is hard won.

 

Of the two, this is the one that moved me most.

  • Like 2
Parker Owens
On 06/09/2016 04:25 AM, northie said:

A pair of poems whose contrasting views are both different yet somehow complimentary, and very affecting.

 

Andy's fear and insecurity permeate almost the whole of the first poem while Zander is portrayed as a panther: sinuous, graceful, dangerous, and magnetically attractive. And yet, Andy does allow his love to win in a strange, slightly macabre way.

 

The anxious, hunted tone of before is replaced in the second poem by calm, tenderness, loving consideration. The peaceful joy of watching a loved one sleep is beautifully portrayed – even more so when that sleep is hard won.

 

Of the two, this is the one that moved me most.

Thank you so much for your review of this set. The second moved me a great deal, too. There is fear in Zander's observation, but his love for Andy predominates. I appreciate your comments, as they parallel my own feelings.

  • Like 1
Parker Owens
On 06/09/2016 06:02 AM, dughlas said:

Somehow I'd missed this. Having read their tale I understood far more deeply what was expressed here and yet if I had only these words still I would have known them. For herein lies their essence.

Thank you, Dugh. You made me feel that I'd done well distilling Andy and Zander to these few words. The two boys haunt me still.

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