Occasional Poetry - 58. Daydreams and Remorse

I'd say the second one is more accomplished – near perfect, in fact. But both are quite sad to read...

This is a pretty depressed time of the year generally, I know I feeling that way, so hopefully the exercise of getting this on paper will help elevate some of the pressure.

As always, thanks for sharing your gift with us

On 01/04/2017 10:59 AM, AC Benus said:

I'd say the second one is more accomplished – near perfect, in fact. But both are quite sad to read...

 

This is a pretty depressed time of the year generally, I know I feeling that way, so hopefully the exercise of getting this on paper will help elevate some of the pressure.

 

As always, thanks for sharing your gift with us

You're right about the time of year. I am so beset by melancholies today, and I hoped Remorse would draw them out. Your response is heartening. Putting things on paper, and then being able to reply, does help. I am sure that this is all a product of a return to routine after the holidays. Many thanks for your kind and warm response.

There is a haunting sadness in both of these that stirs emotions from deep within.
Sadness, but not despair. Longing, but not desperation. Dark, but not black. It's hard to really label the feelings, but it's good to be able to feel them being released.
Beautiful!!

I find myself somewhat jealous ... not of course for your current melancholia, I've enough of my own thank you ... but rather instead the skill with which you weave and cast these nets of words that capture those souls that draw nigh.

On 01/04/2017 12:10 PM, Okiegrad said:

There is a haunting sadness in both of these that stirs emotions from deep within.

Sadness, but not despair. Longing, but not desperation. Dark, but not black. It's hard to really label the feelings, but it's good to be able to feel them being released.

Beautiful!!

Yes, it does feel good to let them go. I am sorry if the darkness expressed here darkens your day, too. But I appreciate your kindness and support.

On 01/04/2017 01:38 PM, dughlas said:

I find myself somewhat jealous ... not of course for your current melancholia, I've enough of my own thank you ... but rather instead the skill with which you weave and cast these nets of words that capture those souls that draw nigh.

Thanks for your words of support and encouragement. Getting out these words helps my own melancholy. It is knowing that others help bear a bit of the weight that helps, too. Many thanks, and peace.

I found Daydreams pensive, but not at all depressing... thoughts as time passes slowly, and looking forward to something better...
Remorse was a different story... how often have I felt like this... I don't want to spend time thinking on it...
Well conceived and written, Parker... cheers... Gary....

Both poems a very well written and both have the power on me to stir up emotions and memories from the past I thought I had come over. Interesting.
But on the other hand, they are a part of me I don`t want to miss, because they make me who I am. So thanks for sharing it was enlightening.
Lyssa

On 01/04/2017 03:21 PM, Headstall said:

I found Daydreams pensive, but not at all depressing... thoughts as time passes slowly, and looking forward to something better...

Remorse was a different story... how often have I felt like this... I don't want to spend time thinking on it...

Well conceived and written, Parker... cheers... Gary....

Gary, I really appreciate your thoughts on these. I am glad you see Daydreams as emotionally neutral, though pensive. In Remorse, I am sorry to have reminded you of the pain and unhappiness I wrote about. We both know this feeling, this emptiness, it appears. Thanks for your support with these. P

On 01/05/2017 04:08 AM, Lyssa said:

Both poems a very well written and both have the power on me to stir up emotions and memories from the past I thought I had come over. Interesting.

But on the other hand, they are a part of me I don`t want to miss, because they make me who I am. So thanks for sharing it was enlightening.

Lyssa

I must apologize for bringing long-buried emotions to the fore. Yet I admire how you seem to face them philosophically, and I very much appreciate your kindness in reviewing both of these.

On 01/05/2017 05:55 AM, Valkyrie said:

These are brilliant, Parker. The second is like looking in a mirror. It's difficult to read only because the sentiment rings so true. It's masterfully written. You are a true poet.

I suspect we all have hours and days we could wish to have again. I can only wish, that is hardly possible. Your remarks are so very kind, and your hugs indeed make me feel better. I thank you and everyone who encourages other writers on GA to offer thoughts and stories for reflection.

Both are good Parker. I liked the first but the second is darn near perfect. I'm not surprised Daydreams is thoughtful and sweet at the end. But Remorse is very sad. It makes me think of the past, when times weren't the best. For me 'dwindling days' was the most heart wrenching.
Great job on both, Parker!!

On 01/05/2017 10:41 AM, Mikiesboy said:

Both are good Parker. I liked the first but the second is darn near perfect. I'm not surprised Daydreams is thoughtful and sweet at the end. But Remorse is very sad. It makes me think of the past, when times weren't the best. For me 'dwindling days' was the most heart wrenching.

Great job on both, Parker!!

I am glad you caught the wistful, drift into sweetness in Daydreams. It surprised me, in that I originally thought it was going somewhere else. Remorse could have had several titles, including the two words you felt most difficult. I was terribly aware of time passing, of having wasted days on stupid stuff, when I could have been doing something more worthwhile, more real. Thanks for your encouragement and insights... - P