The Cockney Canuck - 104. Chapter 104 The End of the Rainbow

I could smell Amy even before I heard her creep up behind me to cover my eyes with her sticky hands. I was sitting on the hallway floor removing my shoes when I was hit by the distinctive sweet aroma of grape flavoured candy.

“Guess who?”

“Err, I don’t know, Amy. Who is it?”

“You just said my name, silly.”

“Your name is silly?”

“No, stupid. You're silly. I’m Amy.”

“Who am I then?”

“You're Robbie, and you're late.”

I peeled her fingers away off my eyelids and was confronted by a lovable, but very purple smile. Behind it, were purple teeth and a purple tongue.

“Do you want some candy?”

“Not if it makes me look like that.”

There was a loud splash from upstairs followed by laughter and a scream. I heard Nicola shouting and then Luke crying. As I stood up, Sue ran past me heading upstairs in a huff, passing Nicola on the way.

“He just soaked me, Mom.” Nicola was seething and wet as she stormed into the kitchen, stopping briefly to put on a fake smile and warn me of impending doom. “Mom knows,” she said.

It didn’t surprise me; someone must have already called her from the school. My adopted parents had more informers than the FBI, I couldn’t sneeze in that place without it getting back to them. Sue looked like she was already in a bad mood, so I decided to make myself scarce and head to my room.

“Luke’s in the bath,” said Amy. “He’s covered in Cool Aid.” I laughed but believed her. “He dropped a whole jug all over everything and it went everywhere.”

“Whereabouts?”

“Over him.”

“No, I mean where?”

“On the stairs,” she tilted her head to give me a purple smile.

“Oh, nice.”

“Alex goes out and Luke wrecks the house,” said Nicola. “Where’s the mop?”

“Where’s Alex gone?”

She answered my question with a shrug of her shoulders before shouting at Daniel. “I need the mop!”

“Wait, will you! I’m trying to clean the stairs.” Daniel was fighting a losing battle by the look of it. Failing to stem the flow of sugary liquid onto the basement floor below. I didn’t want to get involved so I walked through the dining room and out onto the balcony. There were steps outside which led down to the deck and I was able to get to the safety of my room, avoiding the disaster area.

I closed the door behind me shutting out the mayhem and took a deep breath.

‘Sometimes this place is too much for me’.

Talking to Nathan would help restore my karma, so I switched on the computer, removed my t-shirt, and called him on Skype.

“Hey, Robbie, did you take off your shirt just for me?”

“Of course. I know it turns you on.”

“I don’t get to see enough of your body,” he said.

“I know. But I’m happy to show you whenever you want. You know that, right.” He thought that was funny.

“You sounded very Canadian then,” he said and braced himself for my response.

“No, I didn’t!”

“You did. I think you're starting to lose your accent.”

“Bollocks!”

He was probably right though. As much as I hated it, I was picking up certain words and phrases and using them without thinking. I could hear myself do it and now Nathan had noticed. “It’s a lack of sex that does it,” I said.

“Really?”

“Absolutely. It affects people in different ways.”

“First I’ve heard.”

“It’s medically proven. No sex can reduce your lifespan significantly, ask any teacher.”

“Well if that’s the case, then I guess I should drop everything, run over to your house, and put your dick in my mouth before you die.”

“Now you're starting to make sense. But not here. There are too many people in the house who don’t believe in these new medical practices.”

“But how could they complain if I’m saving your life?”

“I know, right. I mean bloody hell, do me a favour, mate. But really, Sue gets a bit funny when it comes to people sucking my dick in the house. So I’ll come over to your place.”

“So you’ll cum on my face?”

“That’s not what I said, but if that’s what you want.”

He was getting excited. He had already dispatched his top and now there were tell-tale signs of self-pleasuring. His arm was moving, but I couldn’t see below his elbow, even when I put my face up to the screen.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to see what you're doing down there.” He thought it was hilarious.

“It doesn’t work like that, Robbie.” I wasn’t that stupid. In fact, I may have been smarter than him. It hadn’t taken me long to figure out the easiest way into Nathan’s pants was to make him laugh, and the easiest way to make him laugh was by playing the fool. “You're adorable sometimes,” he said. “And I wanna do dirty things to you.”

I smiled and sat back in the chair, case proven, it was almost too easy. Now I had a willing participant, all I had to do was find a place to ravish his fleshly beauty without being interrupted. That was the difficult bit.

The Palm Springs Motel was the obvious solution for a boy with money to burn, but impossible on a weeknight and Nathan was going to be busy at the weekend doing a screen test for his commercial.

“I’ll be free the weekend after though and it’s Thanksgiving. My mom wants to know if you’ll come for dinner.”

“I suppose. I don’t really know what it is. We don’t have Thanksgiving in England.”

“It’s pretty boring really, it’s mostly a family thing. My uncle and his kids will be coming over and everyone sits down for a big turkey dinner. It’s like traditional. You better check with Sue first because I know you guys normally have people over.”

“We do?”

“Yes, and Don likes the family there.”

“Thanks for telling me. You can let your mom know I’ll be there.”

He chuckled. “Remember it’s a family day. There’ll be no chance of any naughties but if you want, we could go to Palm Springs the day before. That way, you’ll be too sore to be thinking about sex.”

It sounded good but it was still ten days away which seemed like an eternity. My dick was already standing to attention, so I was thinking of more immediate interim solutions. They all involved my right hand but with Daniel likely to walk in at any moment and Luke hogging the bath, it would have to wait.

“It’s too busy in this house. I never get any time to myself. I can’t do anything.”

“You can’t jerk off, you mean,” said Nathan.

“Yes. I mean no, I can’t. Not without an audience.”

“Sounds kinky?”

“Nicola and Daniel, no thanks.”

“Alex would probably appreciate it.” It was a surprise to hear Nathan mention Alex, even in jest. He seemed to be a little more accepting of my jock friend now we had cleared the air and I told him there was nothing going on between us.

“Alex is not here and besides; I don’t want him. You're the only audience I want. I would jerk off for you any day.”

“Prove it.”

“What now? No! Too many people in the house. But when we go to Palm Springs, I’m gonna prove to you how much I love you.” Nathan’s eyes seemed to come alive as I spoke.

“What are you gonna do to prove it, big boy?”

“Whatever you want.”

“Hmm, it might be something you don’t wanna do.”

“If it turns you on, then I’ll do it. I just wanna please you.”

He started fanning his face with his hand and taking exaggerated breaths. “Geez, Robbie. You're getting me all worked up. I’ll have to see if I can fit you in sooner.”

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll be able to squeeze me in somewhere. Maybe around the back.”

“It might be a bit of a push, but it’s never been a problem for you before. What’s gotten into you lately?”

“Nothing! That’s the problem.”

“Four weeks without sex and you're climbing the walls.”

It wasn’t just the four weeks without sex, there were other considerations. I was wracked by guilt after accusing him of cheating on me with Alex, and desperate to make amends, if only to make myself feel better. I wanted to do something special for him, to repay his loyalty. It was the least I could do, and I had already decided that I would agree to any fantasy he could dream up, no matter how weird or bizarre. Even if it meant sharing him for a night with a stranger. I would do it if it made him happy.

“You can invite a guest too, if you want.”

“You know I would like that, but your conditions don’t make it easy.”

“Forget about the conditions. I don’t mind who it is. As long as you trust him, then I will too.” It was a change of tactics, giving him full control of something which would likely play a big part in the future of our relationship. “It’s you I want though.”

“I’m sorry, baby. I wanna be with you too. There’ll be more opportunities soon, I promise. But we can still meet up, we don’t have to get naked to have fun. We can go out someplace like normal couples.” He had a point, maybe we were putting too much emphasis on sex. We didn’t have to do it every time we were together. I was sure most couples didn’t do that. There were other things we could do which didn’t require a set of handcuffs and a bottle of lube.

To prove this, we arranged to go to the cinema on Friday for a normal date, although I wasn’t convinced it would work. Nathan wasn’t the type to be satisfied sharing candy and popcorn, and the hot dogs were too pliable to make useful props. It would be a test of our resolve, but I seriously doubted he would be capable of keeping his hands to himself or watching a movie without a happy ending.

On Skype, Nathan seemed to be having fun, and he looked as if he was ready to start splashing his keyboard without my assistance. It was a lot easier for him, whereas my activities were severely hampered by having to share a bedroom with Daniel.

Maybe because it was in the basement next to the family room, but at times, it seemed as if our bedroom was a communal meeting place. People who were new to the house would often open the door thinking it was some kind of games room, or just being nosy. They didn’t expect to find a bedroom, which was why I wanted a lock on the door, but Don wouldn’t allow it. It was okay for him; he didn’t have to put up with people walking in at the wrong times. Although admittedly, the worst offenders were the immediate family, like Sue.

When she called my name and knocked on the door, it was an immediate passion killer and I switched off the monitor. When she knocked again and I still didn’t answer, the door opened.

“I was getting changed you know.” I swivelled my chair around and frowned at her.

“While sitting at the computer? Why didn’t you say something?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Can you put a shirt on please.”

I was a little miffed. This was supposed to be my bedroom. It’s not as if I was sitting at the dinner table. Daniel would rarely wear more than a pair of boxers in there.

“Why do I need to put a shirt on in my own bedroom? You don’t make Daniel do that.”

“Maybe because he doesn’t take off his clothes to pose for his boyfriend on the internet. Come on, Robbie. I’m not stupid.”

“I didn’t know Daniel had a boyfriend.”

“You know what I mean.”

I was angry at being found out and a little embarrassed. “Fine, I’m not allowed to even take my shirt off in this house or change my clothes.” She stood in the doorway, arms folded, as I pulled the first thing I found over my head. It was a polo shirt and it was back to front.

She was trying to keep a straight face but I was seething, refusing to admit it was on wrong. “What are you laughing at?”

“Nothing dear, but I didn’t come down here to discuss what you do with Nathan. I want to know why you were late today?”

‘I knew it’.

“You already know why. I had detention.”

“Good, I’m glad you didn’t try to lie to me.”

“No point in lying,” I mumbled.

“No, there isn’t much point in lying. Why did you have detention?”

“For being rude to a teacher.” I tapped the computer keyboard while I waited for Sue’s lecture but it didn’t come.

“I was told what you said.”

“Then why are you asking me? I told Mrs Shaunasee to fuck off because she was being a bitch!” Sue went red with rage. I thought she was going to scream. She didn’t even mention the swear jar. I was pushing her to see how far I could go, a battle I would generally lose, but lately, she was showing signs of fatigue.

“I’ve told you enough times not to swear and now you're swearing at teachers.”

“No, only the one.”

“It’s not good enough, Robbie. I’ve had Mr Andrews on the phone asking if everything was okay at home.”

“AND WHAT DID YOU SAY, YES?”

Sue looked as if she was going to lose it. I was close to being grounded and missing my date with Nathan. One more petulant remark would have sealed it.

There were days like this when she didn’t know how to handle me and I could sense with Don still at work, she was desperate to avoid a confrontation.

“We’ll discuss this later after dinner,” she said. What she meant was—we’ll discuss it when Don gets home—she needed back-up. When I was in these moods, she could no longer handle me on her own. I was fast becoming unmanageable.

*     *     *

The Rainbow Cinema in Cobourg already held a special place in my heart. It was where Fran last worked her magic on me with a feature-length blow job, and where Nathan and I went for our first proper date. Five months later on the first day of October, we returned to the place where it all began.

A lot of things had changed during that time. I knew more people for a start. Probably half of those who were waiting in line with us that Friday evening, including most of the teenagers. This time there was nothing to hide. Everyone knew we were a couple and we proved it by holding hands along with most of the other teenage lovers. It got us a few looks, some questionable, but most friendly, and a lot of people stopped to say hello.

One of them was Kirsty, the screamer. She was with a friend when she recognised me and stopped for a chat. The last time I saw her, I was holding hands with Ginny after booking a room at the infamous Palm Springs Motel, and she was with a man old enough to be her dad. I don’t think she really knew what to make of me, and I wasn’t about to make it any easier for her.

“How long have you guys been dating?”

“Almost six-months,” I said. “But this is only our second date.”

“Wow, take it easy, boys, don’t rush into anything. You're a quick mover, Robbie. But I guess you’ve been in the hospital for a long time.”

“I guess.”

“Well, enjoy the movie. If that’s what you're here for.” It made me wonder how many of the couples standing with us were here to watch the movie. Probably not that many. Most of my previous visits were spent playing tongue twister and Fran once spent an entire showing on her knees with her face in my lap. That was hardcore but the cinema then was almost empty, and tonight it was nearly a full house. There was no way anything like that was going to happen.

Judging by his mood though I had every reason to be hopeful of a little action before the end of the night. Nathan was livelier than I had seen him in a long while. His hands were everywhere, picking my pockets, and brushing against me. Light but deliberate contact and always in the right places. I loved him the most when he was in these moods. He was at his best. Cute, charming, and utterly adorable.

“Who was that girl?” he asked.

“She was in the room next door at the motel. Don’t you remember?”

He covered his mouth. “Oh my God, she was so loud. It was disgusting.” Then he lowered his voice. “Do I ever make that much noise when we… you know?”

“Bloody hell, Nathan. My memory’s improving but I can’t remember that far back.”

“Very funny.”

“Well, you’re never that loud. But you definitely have your moments. Sometimes, you do this high pitched whine that’s really cute.” He was embarrassed and started to blush, but he wanted more. “And then you bite your bottom lip, and look like you're gonna cry.”

“Stop it!”

“It’s true. I swear. Just before you.” He covered my mouth with his spare hand and eyeballed me.

“Don’t. People can hear.” When he was sure I understood, he slowly removed his hand and wiped it on his jeans.

“Before you blow!” I said, and he hit me as I laughed.

“Shush.” He looked around with a bashful smile. There were two girls standing behind us whispering and giggling. I don’t think they heard me above the noise of everyone talking, but they were amused by our very animated conversation. They soon joined in with a ridiculous question.

“Excuse me. Are you guys gay?”

“I’m not,” I said. “But my boyfriend is.”

“It’s okay,” said Nathan, “he’s kidding you.”

“I thought so. I hope you don’t mind me asking, but is there a place where gay teenagers hang out in Cobourg.”

I looked at Nathan who seemed wary. “Why?”

She was nervous. “That sounded bad. I’m not a freak or anything. I just wanted to know where gay people meet around here?”

“They don’t,” he said. “Are you gay?”

The girls giggled. “No, but my brother is. We live outta town in the boonies and there’s nowhere for him to go and meet people. I thought it might be easier for him in Cobourg.”

Nathan seemed to relax a little. “Not much. There are gay teenagers, but most of them are in hiding, too scared to reveal themselves. It’s getting better, but Cobourg’s stuck in a time warp.”

“We have a BLTQ club at school,” I said.

“That’s bacon, lettuce, and tomato,” said Nathan. “Excuse my boyfriend, he’s English.” They laughed at me as my boyfriend comfortably took centre stage. “How did you even know we were gay?”

They hesitated, unsure if it was a joke or not. Until he felt sorry for them and laughed. “I get it. Robbie sticks out like a sore thumb.”

“Actually, it was your multi-coloured nail-polish that gave you away,” she said. “And the eye make-up. Are you wearing lipstick too?”

“I tiny dab,” he said. I hadn’t even noticed, but now he had confessed I began studying his lips. “He’s worried. He doesn’t like lipstick do you, sweetie?” He gave me a quick peck and laughed as I frantically rubbed my cheek and looked at my hand.

“You guys are funny,” said the girl.

“How old is he?” I asked. Nathan frowned as I diverted the conversation away from him and back to the girl’s brother.

“Sixteen and he’s really cute, but he has hardly any friends and he doesn’t know anyone else who’s gay.”

I could almost see Nathan’s ears prick up at the word cute, and I have to admit I was a little curious about this kid too. Sixteen, gay, and cute were the magic words and enough for Nathan and me to start quarrelling for the boy’s company.

I could see my boyfriend hatching a plan, so I jumped in first.

“Do you come to Cobourg a lot?”

“Sometimes.”

“Well, if you're here next Friday, bring your brother with you,” said Nathan.

‘The fucker stole my plan’.

“We’ll be here. He can watch a movie with us.”

Nathan stared at me, annoyed by my interruption. “No, no,” he said. “He’s not gonna wanna do that. He can hang out at the waterfront with us instead. Do you know where the beach is?”

“That’s really sweet,” the girl said. “But he doesn’t know you. He would be too nervous.”

Nathan turned to me. “You should stay at home then; he’ll probably feel intimidated by your accent.”

“She didn’t say that.”

“I think it’s cute,” said the girl and I poked my tongue at my him.

“My boyfriend’s so immature,” said Nathan. “But he makes up for it in other ways, don’t you, sexy?” He was trying to embarrass me by resting his chin on my shoulder and batting his eyelids. We were accumulating an audience, and I couldn’t stop myself from pushing him away. It was as good as a surrender to him.

“I’ll try to get him to come with us next Friday,” she said. “For the early showing, so if you're here, I’ll introduce him to you guys.”

“Cool,” said Nathan. “We could all go for something to eat at Jimmy’s after and maybe he can meet some of my friends.”

“Really, you would do that?”

‘She’s having a laugh. Nathan would probably walk across broken glass to meet a cute boy’.

“It’s no big deal. It’ll be fun meeting him. It’s not much, I know, but probably better than sitting indoors in the boonies… Wherever that is.”

They thought it was good of us to put ourselves out, and we even swapped cell phone numbers as we chatted. They were nice girls, and the one whose brother we were talking about was particularly good-looking with golden blonde hair and deep blue eyes. Very Scandinavian and she couldn’t have been far off his age either.

“They’re twins,” said the other girl. “But he’s better looking.” She was probably joking but Nathan—a sucker for blonds—looked like he was about to faint. I pushed in front of him with a confident swagger. “We’ll be here next Friday, so you're welcome to swing by… If you want to, that is.”

“You're welcome to swing by,” teased Nathan as we found a couple of seats at the back of the movie theatre. “Oh my God, I can’t believe you said that.”

“Well, at least I wasn’t drooling like you. You’ll scare the crap outta the poor kid.”

“There you go, talking all Canadian again.”

“What? Oh, fuck off!”

*     *     *

The movie was funny, but our romantic activities were hampered by couples on either side of us, who seemed more interested in watching us, than doing anything themselves. I wasn’t expecting a sperm guzzling cinematic experience of the Fran variety, but I think second base was a reasonable assumption to make. As it was, we kissed and held hands but that was it, and nothing erotic.

It was nearly ten o’clock when the early showing at the Rainbow finished and we filed into the parking lot outside the mall. It was damp and cold with a blustery wind that scuppered our plans for a walk along the waterfront. Instead, I called a cab and asked to be picked up outside Canadian Tire. It was the next building to the Northumberland Mall, and it spared us having to wait alongside a crowd of frustrated teens. Couples who were hot from making out, but with nowhere to go to take it any further. I knew exactly how they felt.

“Are your parents at home?”

He gave me an apologetic smile and grabbed my hand. “Yes, sorry.”

“That’s okay. I thought so. They never go out.”

“It’s not just my parents,” he said. “Sue never goes out either. Her and Don have your house on lock down. Whenever I’m there they watch me like a hawk.”

“Sue told me off for removing my shirt the other day when I was talking to you on Skype.”

“See what I mean. She’s a control freak. It’s an infringement of your civil liberties.”

“Sue can’t spy on us at the motel,” I said. “And I can take off more than my shirt for you there.”

“I’m sorry, baby. I can’t do this weekend.”

“But you said. Oh, never mind.” I was clutching at straws, I had a feeling he wouldn’t be available. It was becoming a regular pattern.

“I have to be in Toronto tomorrow for the commercial, and we’re going out for the day on Sunday. It’s a family thing that I can’t get out of.”

Nathan put his arm around me and rested his head on my shoulder as the taxi-driver made quick work of the journey to his house.

“Do you still love me, Nathan?”

“Of course, I do. What made you say that?”

“No reason, it’s just, well.”

“It’s because we haven’t been having sex, isn’t it?”

“I get the feeling sometimes you don’t wanna do it with me anymore.”

“Well, you're wrong. You're not the only one who feels horny. I think about it all the time, but there’s nothing I can do if we don’t have anywhere to go.”

I could see the driver watching us in his mirror. He wasn’t one of my regular ones, so I lowered my voice.

“You're always busy at the weekends.”

“Oh my God. One weekend I’m busy, and suddenly it’s all my fault that you haven’t had sex in a month.” Nathan’s voice was louder than necessary, making a mockery of my attempt to keep our love life from the public domain.

“I didn’t say it was your fault.”

“I thought we had a good time tonight. Didn’t you enjoy it?”

“Yes, I did. It was a funny film.”

“What about the other stuff, did you enjoy that? The kissing. Was it that forgettable?”

“No, I enjoyed that too, but…”

“But what, Robbie. Can’t you have a good time without sex?”

I had to think about it. The roles had been reversed. Nathan was usually the one who initiated it and had the biggest appetite.

‘What happened to the Nathan of old. Who is this imposter’?

I didn’t answer, but I was angered by his deliberate attempt to embarrass me in front of the driver. He had been swinging like a pendulum all evening and I was fed up with his changing moods. When the taxi pulled up outside his house, he leaned across to kiss me on the cheek but the damage had been done. No more histrionics.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to shout at you.” I wanted to push him away, but his next kiss caught me on the lips and stayed there until the driver coughed. Probably for the first time ever, I made no attempt to kiss him back. “What’s wrong?”

‘What’s wrong’?

“Can you stay for a while?”

“Why?”

“I wanna talk to you. Please. You still have an hour-and-a-half before you have to be home. If you arrive back this early, you're gonna look totally lame.”

“Make up your mind, kid.” The cab driver was fast losing patience, but he mellowed out when he saw the tip I gave him, and even offered me some advice.

“Four weeks is nothing, kid. Sometimes it’s much longer for me.”

“See,” said Nathan. “Think yourself lucky.” Then he turned to the driver. “You need to get yourself a new girlfriend, mister.”

“Boyfriend,” he corrected him.

I giggled. “Oh,” said Nathan. “Really?”

“No, I’m joking, kid. But have fun tonight, queer boys.” As he drove off, I had a sudden attack of the shivers. I was glad to get out of his cab, even if it meant walking home.

“That guy is creepy,” I said. “He was staring at your bum.”

“Who doesn’t,” said Nathan. He often trod a fine line between humour and narcissism, but I was experienced enough now to know he wasn’t joking.

“Most people, I suppose.”

“What?”

“You're nice, Nathan but don’t kid yourself. Not everyone finds you attractive, and not everyone would want to be with you. You're too girly for a lot of guys. It’s too much for me sometimes. I like boys. Blokes. Men. Males. Not girls in make-up and frilly dresses.” I knew that comment would irk him, but he really needed to be brought down a peg or two. It was the first time I dared to do it and I was surprised by how easily the words flowed.

I was expecting a cold-shouldered response, and it was a few steps before I realised he was no longer walking beside me. When I glanced back, he was leaning against a lamppost staring at his feet.

He wouldn’t look at me and when I tried to put my hand on his shoulder, he pushed me away.

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

“I didn’t want to hurt you?”

“Is that why you like Alex? He’s more macho than me. And I know you like him, I know more than you think.”

This wasn’t good. We were right outside his house. Not the best place for an argument about Alex.

“Shush, people can hear you.”

“I don’t care who hears me!” He was loud and almost guaranteeing us an audience. I shielded my eyes as if trying to hide my identity from the neighbours. People who had already watched me come and go at all hours. It was too late to attempt anonymity, but I thought it would be better if I went home.

“Where are you going?”

“Home.”

“Don’t walk away from me, Robbie.”

I carried on walking.

“I mean it. YOU’LL BE SORRY!”

“I doubt it.”

It was that final threat which made me keep walking. When I reached the end of his road and looked back, he was gone and the lights were off. The house which always looked as if it was smiling, suddenly looked very sad.

It was getting colder and I was wearing only a flimsy jacket, but I insisted on walking. It cleared my head and allowed me time to think.

By the time I got home, I had made my decision.

Whatever the future held for me. Nathan wasn’t going to be a part of it.