The Cockney Canuck - 90. Chapter 90 Caught With My Pants Down

Just as in England, the closer it got to the end of the summer break, the quicker the days seemed to pass and there were now just two weeks to go before the start of the new school year. I wasn’t dreading going back, but I wasn’t exactly looking forward to it either. I would be a different boy from the one who left in the back of an ambulance in mid-June. I would have a new name for a start. In fact, I would probably have a few new names, now that everyone knew about me and my relationship with Nathan.

I was more nervous about the gossip than the prospect of any physical bullying. It was the inevitable whispers and sly looks in the corridors that concerned me the most. These were hurdles which Nathan had had to clear in his first year at high school, without a boyfriend to fall back on. I would have more support than he was afforded but the butterflies were still multiplying every day.

On Saturday afternoon I was ordered upstairs by Nicola to unload the groceries from the car. It was a chore which had become exclusively mine of late and on this occasion required three extra journeys to the basement with frozen food.

“Are you expecting a nuclear war or something?” I asked Sue as she loaded me up with shopping bags. “Is there something that you're not telling me?”

She laughed as she shared a quick sideways glance with her husband before sending me on my way.

‘What is all this frozen shit they’re buying anyway and why are they stocking up on food all of a sudden’?

After filling the downstairs freezer, Sue collared me in the kitchen to ask me who I had invited to Niagara Falls.

“Nathan, Daniel and that Jamie kid from the hospital,” I said. “I haven’t asked Rory yet. Oh and Amy, I suppose.”

“It’s okay honey, Amy isn’t going. She’s a little young to be hanging around with fifteen-year-old-boys. I’ll take her somewhere else.”

“It’ll give you boys a chance to have some fun together without your little sister hanging around your neck all day,” said Don. It wouldn’t have been a problem for me, but maybe he realised that it would most likely be his neck who Amy would be hanging around all day.

“So should I invite someone else?”

“No,” said Sue. Her reply was unusually abrupt and brought a hard stare from Don who then turned his attention to me.

“Do you think that you could keep it to four plus yourself, it would be more manageable that way?”

I couldn’t see what difference it would make having five excited teenagers in the car instead of six, but I was grateful to be going at all and still expecting him to hit me with the terms and conditions.

‘There has to be a reason why he’s doing this. It can’t be out of the goodness of his heart’.

“That’s fine, I don’t really have any other friends anyway.” There was Alex of course, but he was a bit of a loose cannon and Nathan wouldn’t have liked it if I had invited him. I was happy enough with the guest list as it was. My boyfriend, my brother, my best friend, and my new pal Jamie. All we had to do on the day was lose Don and it would be perfect.

* * * * *

I still had one more person to officially invite; and that was the boy who, with the exception of Nathan, had been my closest friend since arriving in Canada.

“I was beginning to think that you lost my number,” said Rory when I called him the following day.

“No of course not; I’ve just been a bit busy that’s all.”

“Cool, what have you been doing?”

“Err, oh, you know…things.”

“Oh yeah, things,” he said and laughed. “You have no idea how much time I spend doing things every day.”

“Okay, you got me,” I said. “I haven’t really been that busy, I just didn’t want you thinking that I’ve been avoiding you.”

“But you have been avoiding me.” He sounded fairly upbeat about it though.

“Yeah I know, but it wasn’t because I didn’t want to see you.”

“Err, that doesn’t make any sense, but it’s okay, I know that you’ve had to spend a lot of time indoors, because of your injury. It’s cool.”

“So do you think that you can come? I’d like you to be there.”

“Are you going there to get married?” he asked and giggled.

“I don’t get it.”

“Niagara Falls, dummy. It’s where people go to get married on the quick, it’s the honeymoon capital of Canada. I thought that you might be getting married, you know to Nathan.” He thought it was funny, of course.

“I didn’t know that, but don’t worry, we’re definitely not getting married.”

“Well, I’m supposed to be helping my dad with something over the long weekend,” he said. “But I’d like to go.”

“Come on Rory, you’ll have fun. I’m sure your dad won't mind if you ask him. Please, you can sit next to me in the car.”

“You are so gay,” he said.

“We can hold hands then if you want?”

“Stoppit, you jerk. I’m not holding hands with you.”

“So what do you want me to hold?”

“Nothing of mine, okay. Fine, I’ll go if you keep your hands to yourself, gay boy.” He laughed but then felt the need to apologise, which was totally unnecessary, I knew he was only joking. Rory was sometimes almost too nice for his own good.

He was happy when I told him that Daniel would be there—they had got along quite well when we went to the Blue Jays game—but he was even more excited when I mentioned that Jamie was coming too. It was shy Rory, who had been the first to walk over and introduce himself to the sick looking kid while visiting me at the hospital.

“It’s cool about your adoption though, that will be neat, turning your cousins into brothers and sisters, but what about your uncle and aunt?”

“What about them? They’ll still be my uncle and aunt.”

“No, Robbie, not according to the law. They’ll be your mom and dad; you know that right?”

“Yeah, of course, on paper. But it doesn’t mean a lot.” He went silent for a few seconds, which with Rory, was always a sign that he didn’t particularly agree.

“It means that they’re gonna be your parents from now on, until like forever. Your mom and dad. That’s what it means. As long as you're okay with that then it’s cool.”

“Yeah, I know,” I said but I thought that it was an odd thing to say. Rory was the only one of my friends to voice caution over the adoption. He had spoken to me after I ran away and he knew the problems that I had with Don, more than anyone except Nathan. I appreciated his concern and I loved the way he was looking out for me, but it would have been too late to back out and I didn’t want to either.

“Oh there’s something else that I need to tell you,” I said. “Are you ready for this?”

“You're gay!”

“Well, yeah obviously, but….”

“And everyone knows it?”

“Well, yeah…how did you know?”

“David told me; I saw him last week. I’ve heard it from someone else too, a girl in my history class. Is that what you were gonna tell me?”

“Uh huh, so are you okay with everyone knowing?”

“What’s it got to do with me?”

“Well, are you still going to be my friend at school and do you still want to sit with me at lunch? That kinda stuff.”

“Does it mean having to kiss you?”

“What? No, of course not! Not unless you wanted to that is.”

“I’m good thanks,” he laughed. “But of course I still wanna be your friend and sit with you. That’s just silly.”

I knew what his answer was going to be before I even asked him. I would have gladly laid money on it, but for some reason, I still needed the reassurance of hearing him say it. That was important to me.

* * * * *

It was bound to happen sooner or later and on Monday afternoon our luck ran out. We had been taking far too many risks and it was inevitable that eventually, somebody would catch us in the act.

Fortunately, it was only Daniel who strolled into the bedroom unexpected to find me in a compromising position with my boyfriend. I was sitting on the bed naked while Nathan was kneeling in front of me with his face between my legs. He was dressed and had his back to the door, so Daniel wouldn’t have been able to see much, but it would have been blatantly obvious what he was doing.

With Sue and Amy out shopping, and Nicola at Jimmy’s house, it had seemed like a good opportunity for a bit of slap and tickle and I called Nathan as soon as Daniel told me that he was meeting up with Doug to go swimming. When he left Nathan arrived, but what would have been a perfect plan, backfired when my brother to be, returned to the house half-an-hour later, after forgetting something.

His timing could not have been worse; especially for Nathan, who was forced to swallow more than just his pride as Daniel did a quick about turn and ran out of the room, looking like he had seen a ghost. Nathan didn’t move until we heard the front door slam shut.

“I don’t believe that he just caught me doing that,” he said. “That’s so embarrassing. I’m just gonna deny it was me. He didn’t see my face did he?”

“Well, who else would it be then, stupid?”

“Don’t ask me, I wasn’t even here,” he said as he combed his hair with his fingers and straightened himself out. “You must have been cheating on me with somebody else, who looked just like me, naughty boy.” He pulled a comical face and wagged his finger at me.

“I don’t know any other gay boys,” I said.

‘Except Alex’.

“Who said anything about a boy? Anyway, you should get yourself dressed before Sue turns up with Amy, or you’ll really be in the trouble and strife.”

I screwed my face up at him and laughed as I began the now almost ritualistic search for my clothes.

“No Nathan, you got it wrong, trouble and strife means wife, you bell end. What you should’ve said was…Barney. Barney Rubble; trouble, get it?”

“No,” he replied handing me a sock. “It’s a stupid way to talk anyhow.”

“Well, did you know that Niagara Falls was the honeymoon capital of Canada?” I said.

“Duh…yes.”

“Oh.”

“But you didn’t, right?”

“Of course I did, I’m not stupid…no I didn’t,” I said. “Why would I. Not until Rory told me at the weekend. Aha, there they are.” I stooped to pick up my shorts from under Daniel’s desk.

It always amazed me how far away some of my clothes would land, during the mad rush to shed them. At such times, of course, the only thing on our minds was sex, but the small amount of time saved by ripping them off was often negated by the frustratingly long task of searching for them afterwards.

“So why did you mention that, are you asking me to marry you or something?” he teased me with a flirtatious smile.

“No! That’s not what I was saying, we’re too young anyway.”

Nathan had a huge smile on his face as his eyes followed me around the room.

“You're already starting to act like Daniel’s brother,” he said. “It must run in the family.”

“What do you mean?”

“You're naked!”

“So, you’re the only one in here,” I said. “Where’s my other sock? Have you seen it anywhere?”

He shook his head and then threw me my briefs instead, which landed on top of Daniel’s monitor.

“If it was up to me; you would never be allowed to wear clothes, but Sue’s gonna be back soon and I don’t wanna be caught twice on the same day. Your family will ban me from coming over, and please don’t make a joke of that.”

“I would never make a joke out of you coming. It’s too hot to be funny." I grabbed him tight around the waist and pulled him close to kiss him, but he surrendered immediately, closing his eyes and tilting his head.

It was the kissing which often cost us the most time, lately, it was lasting longer than the sex and it was just as erotic. I was moaning in his mouth and humping his leg like a Jack Russell when I heard a car pulling into the driveway.

“SHIT!”

“I told you,” he said.

There was no time for underwear, so I pulled on my shorts and t-shirt while Nathan straightened the room. We were back in front of the television with seconds to spare before I spotted Sue coming around the back entrance and through the patio doors.

‘Was she trying to catch us out by coming around the back’?

If she was, then she had failed, but only just and our strategic positions on opposite ends of the couch, probably gave us away.

What couple would sit so far apart, if they hadn’t been up to something? It must have looked very stage-managed and her expression gave away her suspicions; she just didn’t have any proof.

* * * * *

“That was so embarrassing,” said Nathan on the phone to me later. “I can’t believe that we got caught by Daniel. Has he mentioned it to you?”

“Yeah, apparently he was watching us for ages before I noticed him in the doorway.”

“You're making that up.”

“Nope, he was amazed at how you managed to fit something so huge in your mouth.”

“Now, I know your lying. But seriously, he’s gonna give me a hard time over this.”

“Can I watch?”

“It’s not funny.”

“He’s going to give you an earful to go with your mouthful, you mean? I said and fell about laughing.

“That’s disgusting,” he said.

“That’s not what you were saying to me at the time.” I could remember his exact words, being pretty much the opposite, but there was no way that I was going to repeat them. They were the kind of encouraging phrases only spoken during sex and usually close to the end.

I could hear his naughty giggle and was pretty sure that he was blushing.

“Oh my God, I’m gonna have to drug you and erase your memory somehow. It’s all your fault.”

“I never forced you to do it, if you remember, you were the one tearing my clothes off…oh and I still haven’t found my sock by the way.”

“I took it as a souvenir, I’m gonna pin it above my bed, with the rest of them.”

“Oh, that’s cute…I wondered where all my socks were going.”

“Only one of them is yours.”

‘I should’ve seen that coming’.

* * * * *

Despite Nathan’s fears, it was Daniel who seemed to come out of it the worst and when he asked Sue if he could stay that night at Doug’s house, I got the feeling he arranged it on purpose so that he could avoid me. We hadn’t spoken since he returned from swimming and there were a few odd looks exchanged between us across the dinner table. Nothing that would suggest he was particularly annoyed with me, but it was enough for Nicola to notice something was wrong and she interrogated me about it after Daniel had left.

I was on my own clearing the table and she was following me like my shadow, back and forth between the dining area and kitchen.

“I don’t know what you're talking about, there’s nothing wrong with Daniel and if you must tail me, then could you at least carry something out with you?”

“No, this is your job,” she said.

“Yeah, well I usually have someone to help me, I’m doing everything around here lately.”

“It’s not my fault you upset Daniel.”

“I didn’t upset him; we’ve been getting on really well, it’s just that sometimes I think it still bothers him seeing Nathan and me together.”

“I don’t think he has a problem seeing you together but he might have a problem…if for example, he caught you fucking him. That would never happen though would it?”

“Nicola. Bloody hell!” I nearly dropped the plates that I was cradling and she had to take one off me to avoid a disaster. I swallowed hard as I turned to face her.

‘He told her’.

“We weren’t...doing anything like that,” I said. Don and Sue were in the living room, and I signalled for her to keep her voice down. “What did Daniel say to you?”

“He told me that he walked in on you guys this afternoon.”

“Well, we weren’t doing what you said we were and. Wait a minute, why am I even having this conversation. It was nothing.”

“He wouldn’t have told me this if he had caught you guys playing chess Robbie.”

I chewed my lip and watched her as she waited for an explanation but I had nothing more to say and returned to my chores.

‘Nosy cow. Why does she need to get involved anyway’?

I suppose that I should have been pleased that he had talked to Nicola about it rather than either of the so-called adults of the house, but I would have preferred it if he had taken his complaint directly to me. I got the impression, however, that it was Nicola who had approached Daniel and not the other way around.

She loved playing the Jerry Springer role and getting herself involved in other people’s problems, especially if it was anything to do with my relationship with Nathan.

She watched me load the dishwasher and then followed me out of the kitchen with an annoying grin on her face. It was clear that she wasn’t going to leave me alone until I opened up, so I ducked into the downstairs washroom.

“You can’t follow me in here,” I said and pulled a face, but I could only pee for so long and when I opened the door she was still standing there with her arms crossed. “Okay, you win, what do you wanna know?”

“What were you doing when he walked in?”

“Can’t you use your imagination?”

“I won't tell anyone.”

“Why do you need to know?”

“I’m just curious.”

“You think it’s funny.”

“Hilarious.”

“Well, it’s not,” I insisted. “And obviously Daniel doesn’t think so either.”

“I’m sure he’ll get over it.”

At first, I was under the impression that Nicola was trying to play mother and reprimand me in some way, or warn me about being careless in the house, but she obviously wasn’t doing this for Daniel’s sake. I decided to turn it back on her and see what reaction I got.

“Okay, what do you do with Jimmy when you're up in your room for hours on end?” I folded my arms and stared her out.

“We have sex; so what, sometimes I suck his dick.”

“NICOLA!”

“What? You asked me.”

“You're not supposed to tell me though. I don’t wanna know what you two do?”

“Then don’t ask me, dickhead!” I had managed to get her riled, shades of the good old days as she stormed across the kitchen. “You ungrateful little shit.”

“Ungrateful?”

“Yes, I’ve been trying to help you.”

“How?”

“Do I need to explain out loud with mom and dad in the living room?” She spoke quietly but I still wasn’t comfortable discussing our little arrangement.

“You do that to help yourself,” I said, and she turned to me menacingly.

“Fine, if that’s what you think, then don’t ask me to help you again,” she said.

“I don’t need your help.”

“Of course not; you're doing such a good job yourselves!”

Our little disagreement was loud enough to bring Sue into the kitchen with a face like thunder. “What are you two arguing about now?”

I would have loved to have told her the truth just to see her expression, but when I looked at Nicola, it suddenly became very funny and she must have thought so too. The moment our eyes met we burst out laughing.

Sue looked a little perturbed by this unexpected allegiance of mirth, but there was little that she could do about it. After all, we were only laughing.

There was a part of me that always believed that she was happier when we were fighting than when we were colluding and I was beginning to understand why. Divide and conquer as my history teacher would say but obviously, those days had gone. Even when we disagreed, we still shared common goals and Sue and Don were the establishment.

At times, it was an uneasy coalition and Nicola’s willingness to share details of her love life with me in return for snippets of mine, was, I concluded, a step too far. I was happy to guard her bedroom door when asked, in return for similar favours, but I had no desire to know what was going on behind it. I suppose it was a measure of how she viewed our own changing relationship now that I had switched sides, so to speak. With less than ten days to go before my official amalgamation into the ranks of the Taylor family, I got the feeling that she was expecting to gain sister as well as a brother.

‘So Nicola likes to suck dicks, huh. That may be the only thing we have in common’.

* * * * *

When Daniel arrived home the next day, I was relieved to hear him talking to me as normal. We spent the evening watching the Blue Jays lose and there was no mention of Nathan or the incident from the previous day, until late that night in bed.

“Robbie, are you asleep?”

“Yes.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“You just did.”

“Can I ask you something else?”

“Are you gonna leave me alone if I say yes?”

“No.”

“Then no,” I said.

“Is that no, as in it’s okay to ask you, or no as in don’t ask you?”

“Yes, as in no, it’s okay.”

“You’ve lost me.”

“You’re the one who’s lost.”

“That’s what I said.”

“Are you winding me up?”

“No.”

“Then what did you wanna ask me?”

I was ninety-nine point nine percent certain I knew what it was, but I was wrong.

“How old were you when you had sex, for the first time?” I was just happy that there was no mention of Nathan in the question, but I had to think hard before answering.

“Fifteen,” I said.

“Oh, that’s how old you are now. But it wasn’t with Fran though right?”

‘What is he getting at’?

“No, in England. Why do you wanna know?” Thinking that the conversation was over, I rolled onto my side and pulled the sheet across my shoulders to go to sleep, but he hadn’t finished.

“With a guy?”

“Well, I….”

“Cause you already told me that Fran was the only girl you’ve been with.”

‘I did’?

“Yeah, that’s right. Can we talk about this in the morning?”

There were a few seconds of silence and I closed my eyes and sank into my pillow before he spoke again and alarm bells started ringing in my head.

“It was Tom, wasn’t it? The boy you stayed with. It makes sense.” I sat up, no longer tired and he did the same switching on his bedside lamp. “That’s why you were so upset when you arrived. You weren’t homesick, you missed Tom. Am I right?”

It wasn’t a question, more a statement of fact and my inability to offer any kind of denial was all the proof that he needed. It was an obvious conclusion to arrive at, the only surprise was that nobody had figured it out sooner.

I couldn’t see how this could possibly have any effect on my life at the moment now that I was out, but I still felt bad talking about it to anyone. We had an agreement after all, and I had sworn to Tom that I would never divulge our secret to anyone. Nathan and Fran had both been necessary exceptions to the rule but I hadn’t planned on expanding this list.

“I guess that I’m right then,” said Daniel.

“Why do you even wanna know, it’s nothing to do with you or anyone else in this family.” I think he was surprised by my tone but I was getting tired of people talking about my private life, not that anything in my life was private anymore.

“You don’t have to tell me, I don’t really care,” he said. “But you guys are always doing shit around me and I can’t even walk into my own bedroom without seeing Nathan sucking your dick.”

‘I knew this would have to come into it’.

“I’m sorry about that,” I said. “We weren’t expecting you to come back so soon.”

“You think?”

“It’s embarrassing.”

“Oh yeah, for me too.”

“It won’t happen again.”

“It will; you’ll just make sure not to get caught next time.” He was absolutely right, of course. It wasn’t like we would never do it again, but we would be more careful.

I turned over to bury my head in the pillow and heard him switch off the light.

“Tom is straight,” I said out of the blue. “He has a girlfriend now; what happened didn’t mean anything and it wasn’t much. I promised him that I would never tell. It would hurt him if it got out. Don still talks to his parents.”

“I get it,” said Daniel. “I would never tell, but does Tom know about Nathan?”

“Yes, why?”

“No reason. Goodnight.”

I had never keep Nathan a secret from Tom and I couldn’t see any reason why I needed to. It didn’t make sense.

“Tom and I are only friends.”

“I know, I just wondered that’s all.”

‘They’re all mad; it’s not me, it’s them. I must be bloody crazy agreeing to join this family’.