18 Weeks of Twoey - 42. Week Six Sunday, October 12, 2014: The Visit

Emotion sometimes forces me to stray.

Gary and I ran this morning and congratulated each other for the good results we each had in Friday's races. “I'm going to spend the whole day with Twoey ...I'll text you from the hospital to let you know what I find out.”

Before breakfast, I discovered my father alone, having a cup of coffee in the den.

“Mrs. Messer is going to pick me up at 10:30 to spend the day at the hospital preparing Twoey for the tutoring I’m going to do, so he won't fall behind in school.” It wasn't too much of a stretch from the truth.

“You know David, you're being a very good friend and I'm really proud of you. Don't worry about church today. I'm glad your friend is starting to recover.”

Which means I'm sure he'll run all the interference I need with Tommy's mother.

Wait ...What? Did he say he was proud of me?

My father said he was proud of me?

I now had an extra hour for mediation. I needed it. The purpose of this morning's meditation was to form a story narrative I could stick with and not have to lie. I don't want to lie to Twoey. This had to be all true stuff, which would permit me to tiptoe around the land mines.

During my meditation, an encounter scenario came to me. It will allow me to probe how much he actually believes our dream encounters were true. It’ll be important to know when it comes to my entire relationship with Twoey, both in the hospital and later at his house.

Finally it was time to shower and get ready. I decided to dress really bright and sharp to help lift his spirits. No dreary clothes! I thought it would be a perfect opportunity to wear my light grey skinny jeans for the first time. I wore an American Eagle Tee in darker grey with light grey letters, finishing with a dark maroon belt and matching Vans. I spent about half an hour working with my impossible hair, but I sorta won.

Upon our arrival, I was surprised to see a Quarantine sign on the closed door to the short hall where his room was. I asked Ginny about it. She explained it was to keep any snoops away. I was confused until it hit me. This is still part of the military cover-up! Ginny knows about it too. I wonder what they’re gonna tell Twoey?

WTF! These assholes are playing with my friend’s sanity! I began to get a little steamed. Ginny broke me out of it when she said, “You’re the only one besides me who is allowed to see Michael until he learns what happened. You realize you must not tell him anything yet. Wait here for a minute.”

Ginny went into his room first, I guess to see how he was feeling. A few minutes later, she came to the door and motioned me in, but she went out. I walked in and it was me and Twoey alone.

I slowly walked up to the bed, opposite the IV side, and he watched my every move with a wide awake expression. It was like he didn't expect me, but I know his mother said she told him. He looked fragile and very thin and hurt ...lying there. I became sort of emotional inside and almost choked up.

There lay my friend. The boy I’m magnetically attracted to. The boy who almost died. The boy I expected to die. Here he was. He was looking at me. There was a new look in his eyes, those beautiful green eyes, as he watched me.

We stayed staring at each other, drinking each other in, for a long time. He reached for his pad, but I got there first, took it, tossing it over to the chair behind me. His eyes got wide. I took his hand in mine and now watched him. I'm sure he could tell I was trembling a little. I placed my other hand on top and closed my eyes. I tried to see if we could communicate as we did in the dream place, but I couldn't make contact. I started with my prepared dialog.

“I framed the half dollar you gave me and placed it on my desk. I hope you never feel the need to make me the owner of both halves. It was a big surprise to get it, especially when your mom explained the meaning of it. I feel honored.” I opened my eyes and studied him carefully. If our encounter had been real, I would not have been surprised about getting the half-dollar.

But his eyes betrayed nothing. SHIT.

I studied his wound. It was on the left side of his neck in exactly the same position my screen revealed. I didn't need any more convincing for myself, but I was hoping he'd think it wasn't a real encounter we had ...it was a dream or hallucination.

I got a little closer and gently touched the harness. I asked, “What the heck kind of contraption is this?”

He pointed to his pad but I said, “No. I don't need to know right now. Today isn't for questions and answers. It's why I took your pad away. Today is for me being grateful my friend is alive and considers me a best friend. You're gonna get me in so much trouble with Gary. I grew up with Gary, like you did with Mike. We're that kind of best friends, at least until whatever happened between you two. If the same thing ever happened between me and Gary, I know I would be a basket case. I can understand how it affected you.”

Again I looked into those magnetic green eyes and ...I forgot my script. They drew something out of me I had no intention of saying!!

“Twoey, there is something different in the way I feel about you. There is an attraction which hit me the moment I first saw you way back when you moved in. It hit me so strong, I was so unprepared for it, I had to run home because my brain was in a frazzle.”

Little by little, it began to happened. Everything began to overwhelm me.

I started to fill up. The tears were kept in my eyes for a few seconds, but he could see them. They started to roll down my cheeks and I had no way to stop them.

I was out of control.

I let go of his hands and slowly walked out of the room. Ginny was sitting in the hall and she rushed up when she saw my tears and hugged me, asking what was wrong.

I said, “I’m OK, but a little overcome right now. I need a cup of coffee to clear my head. I’ll be back in about 15 or 20 minutes.” I left her and made my way down to the cafeteria and did get a cup of black coffee, sipping it while trying to salvage my dialog.

After about half an hour I returned and walked in. Ginny looked at me questioningly, but I told them both it had simply been too much, seeing him there. I had needed some time to settle down. I was okay now.

She left again.

Twoey had his board back. He held it up and it said: “Too thin.”

I told him, “I think it's to be expected. I heard you only now got back on solid food.”

He gave me a disgusted look and pointed at me. I chuckled and said, “Oh me? Yeah, Tommy’s mother was trying to starve me by feeding me pig slop, but between your mom and the weight-Nazi nurse, I've gained a couple of pounds back. I think I'm OK now.”

But he scowled and slowly shook his head no at me. He wrote: “Derek Jeter” and held it up to me. Those green eyes started to penetrate now. Right. This is it. He wants to know if it was a dream. I'm impressed with his choosing the quickest detail to confirm it. I guess Twoey's pretty smart too, which means I have to watch my step. No lies.

I scrunched my face. “Um... he retired? Twoey, is this a quiz on my baseball knowledge? Cuz if it is, you've gotta do better than that. I mean, I'm a student of the game! Now if you asked me what his batting average was in 1999, I could say .349. Jeez, I KNOW he's retired!”

I wanted to see how he would react.

With a stony stare, is how.

This was not going to be easy.

“Tell me the TRUTH?” He wrote it with a huge question mark.

I pulled the chair over and sat down. I checked to make sure his mom was still out of the room and held his hand. “Always. I'll never lie to you.”

This was it!!!

He slipped his hand free and wrote: “did u talk to me”

OK, I could easily walk around his question without lying, but the look in those green eyes made it impossible for me to try any more deflections. My dialog had now gone to SHIT. I exhaled.

“Yes”

His stare suddenly softened and he relaxed. I knew within a single word I had confirmed a hell of a lot. I connected with him when he was unconscious. I would watch over him. I diagnosed his headaches. I said I loved him.

He slipped his hand back into mine. My tears started again as Ginny returned. She looked at us, at me, asking if I was OK.

“Um ...not really, but I'm happy.”

She gave me a puzzled look but asked what I had eaten today.

“Well I had the cup of coffee about an hour ago.”

Two scowls were directed at me and Ginny said, “Alright, as soon as Michael's lunch is delivered we're going to the cafeteria. No excuses!!” A little later, in the cafeteria, she filled my tray and sat down with me to make sure I ate it.

“You know, you don't have to watch me, I'll eat.”

“I enjoy tormenting you! Now eat!”

Haha ...I really do like her. I’m definitely making her my new mom. While I ate, we talked about the after-school arrangements which she thought might be starting up in about two weeks. But I had to ask.

“Do you know what happened to your son?”

“Yes.”

“Everything??”

“Yes. How much do you know?”

“Everything.”

Her eyes suddenly got bigger. “EVERYTHING?”

I nodded sadly.

She asked, “Does anyone else know?”

“Not that I'm aware, and certainly they never will from me.”

“How did you find out?”

I sat quietly for a few moments. “I can't tell you. It'll break a trust.”

Ginny nodded silently and accepted my answer.

I said, “Including Twoey ...you understand, don't you? He can never learn I know. Please don't say anything to make him ask me, because I can't lie to him.”

She came over and hugged me and planted a kiss on my cheek, like a real mother does. We returned to his room.

Twoey was finishing his lunch and I told him I was going to text a few people to let them know how he was doing. “...and also your soup-Nazi behavior.” Which got him to smile.

I texted Gary, brought him up to date, asking him to relay the info to everyone who would want to know except Kathy and Lanni because I was going to text them next. Kathy said she was happy to hear Twoey was improving and happy I was going to text Lanni. I told her of my plan to be Twoey's fingers for texting with Lanni. She thought it was brilliant.

I asked Twoey if he wanted me to use his phone to text Lanni, but Ginny interrupted, explaining Twoey wasn't allowed to have his phone yet. OMG! Right away I saw my goof! Of course! If he had his phone he could have done it himself! Worse, he would have been able to find out about the shooting and even about Danny.

I quickly glided past my little slip-up and told Twoey I was going to be his fingers and text Lanni for him. He smiled and got his pad ready. I told him to keep his answers short as I would fill in most of the words. When Lanni returned the initial text I told her to text as though I were Twoey. She asked how he was feeling. Before he wrote I asked, “Better, but feeling confined?”

He smiled and didn't write anything. It went on like this for a while, with Twoey having to write little or nothing because he was comfortable with almost all my responses. Finally she asked if Twoey wanted to ask her something. He wrote: “sorry ... dance.”

I thought I knew what he meant and asked, “You want me to apologize for not taking her to the dance?”

He smiled and wrote: “she missed it.”

I told him Lanni and Deena went and didn't miss it. He smiled as I texted the apology. I could tell they were out of stuff to talk about. I wrapped up the texting.

We spent the rest of the day talking with our eyes. I helped him up to walk around a little. I guess his doctors want him to walk. He even rolled into the bathroom a few times and I helped by shutting the door to give him privacy.

Finally at about 6:30 his mom heard the food carts in the hall and said we should go home now, she was going to feed me. I winced. He smiled. She went up, kissed him good-night and said, I’ll see you in the morning. I’ll wait in the hall while David says good-bye.” She left us alone. OMG ...she's something else!

He motioned me over. When I got there, he motioned me down. I thought he was going to whisper something ...I forgot he couldn't talk ...I bent down and ...he kissed me ...and ...I kissed him back! Only a light kiss. Why did I kiss him back?

Am I crazy?

Why am I deviating so far from The Plan? This isn't even in the same galaxy as The Plan! I didn't know what to do or what to say. I squeezed his hand, walked to the door, turned, gave him a bashful smile and left.

OMG! OMG! It felt sooo right!

When we got back to her house, Ginny had me put a small pot of water to boil for pasta while she sliced a couple chicken breasts into strips, dusting them with flour. She asked me to slice two big mushrooms as she sautéed the chicken in a fry-pan, then threw in the mushrooms. After a few minutes, she added some chicken stock to the fry-pan as the pasta water started to boil. She tossed some penne into the boiling water and asked me to get some peas from the freezer. By now the stock was boiling and she tossed in some peas and partially covered the fry-pan. While we waited about 10 minutes for the pasta, Ginny cut the crowns from a fresh head of broccoli, placed them in a covered dish with a drop of water and nuked them for 3 minutes. She drained the pasta tossed it in with the chicken, covered and let it simmer together while we set the table. She plated the pasta and chicken, with broccoli on the side. A heavenly meal for us. I ate every bit. Unbelievable! We were eating 45 minutes after we walked in the door! Ginny’s fast food. And it was sooo good!

“Okay David, you had your first cooking lesson.”

I smiled and said, “I think I'm in love with you!”

She kissed my cheek and said, “Speaking of which, tell me how you feel about Michael.”

Well, he warned me!

“Um ...what do you want me to say?”

“The truth.”

Ohhh, this was bad.

Well, I was not going to lie to a witch. Who knows what evil spell she could cast on me ...really. I even got goose-bumps.

“I’m confused and torn in half. My heart feels him and wants me to be near him all the time. It connects me with Twoey. It makes me think of him all the time too. It gives me a jolt each time I look into his eyes.”

“On the other hand, my mind wants to believe this isn’t what it seems. That there's an explanation, waiting for me out there somewhere. That I shouldn’t jump to conclusions. That I shouldn’t hurt Twoey by making him think it’s what he wants it to be.”

“I don’t ever want to hurt Twoey. I love him too much for that. OMG I said I loved him! See ...that’s the problem! My mind and heart are pulling me in different directions. It’s all starting to overwhelm me.”

My visit ended with me trembling and being held in Ginny’s arms, like a real mom would.

Twoey

The nurse told me to get up and walk around for more than going to the bathroom. I did and walked around the room a bit this morning. I even sat for a few minutes in the chair to rest, and walked around some more. I was pretty tired when I got back into bed and, of course, it’s exactly when Mom walked in. She said I looked tired and I wrote: “walking.” She smiled and said I had a visitor.

I thought, this better be who she promised! She went out and he walked in.

I think my jaw hit my chest! I mean, seeing him near me always gets my heart pounding but today he was a vision of beauty. All grey with red accents and his blond hair was absolutely glowing. The only thing wrong was he was seriously too thin. Like he hadn't been eating for a month! His beautiful face was thinner than it should have been. Even the American Eagle shirt sort of hung on him a little, instead of being nicely filled. What's happening to my David??!!??

He didn't say anything, only stared at me. I reached for my pad, but he grabbed it and threw it on the chair! He took my hand in both of his and closed his eyes. One of us was shaking, and I think it was him. We stayed until he started speaking. He told me he framed the half-dollar I gave him. Awww ...but said it was a surprise. Didn't he remember I told him in our shared dream? Oh ...maybe I created the whole thing in my head! He said he loved me, but in the dream! Oh God, what a whole parallel world I created from a dream!

I felt stupid.

He started talking and ended with him saying he was attracted to me and had been from the first moment he saw me! Just like me. But tears started to flow down his cheeks. Awww ...my David is crying. He let go of my hand. I was about to brush his tears away when he turned around and left. Like on the first day! Oh he's unbelievably frustrating!!

Mom came in and I gave her a questioning look. “David went to get a cup of coffee. I think he wants to get his emotions under control. He said he'll be back soon. Did you say something to him?”

I shook my head and pointed to the pad. She gave it to me and I wrote he didn't want me to talk. She chuckled. She began to talk, sort of white noise, as my mind was working overtime. I needed to know if the dream was only a dream. I needed to know why he was so thin. I needed to know what was wrong with me. I needed to know a million things, but I knew I'd have to limit my questioning or I'd scare him away, which would absolutely kill me!

He finally came back and Mom left us alone again. I clutched the pad tightly. He wasn't going to snatch it away again. I thought I would start with something easy. I wrote: “too thin” and frowned.

He started talking about me being thin! Okay, David. You're gonna be slippery like a lawyer. I pointed at him and he finally admitted he had lost weight but said he was gaining back because Mom was feeding him instead of his mother. It got me confused. Why would it matter who fed him?

Oh well, I wasn't going to get snagged on details. I went for the money. I wrote: “Derek Jeter” because it was the surest connection between dream worlds, although I have no idea why he ever mentioned him. I knew somehow it was important.

Now he paused for a microsecond and because of the pause, I honestly expected a lie. See, I've learned a bit from Mom over the years. A short pause is often very revealing. But again, he surprised me. He acted (and I mean acted like on TV) like I was giving him a quiz and showed off his knowledge of Jeter's stats. Grrr! Slippery!!

I was frustrated! I’d had enough. I asked him if he would tell me the truth! I could see him a little stunned. Good ...I was done with all his bullshit. I think he realized it too. I almost felt ashamed. He was having so much fun dancing around my questions, and I spoilt his game. He pulled the chair over and sat down, making sure we were alone. He gently squeezed my hand and said he would never lie to me.

I was going to write more, but I chose the bare minimum: “did u talk to me.”

OK, his turn. Was he going to play with me some more or was he going to get serious. I gave him as icy a stare as I could manage, but it's pretty hard to manage when I look at him.

Anyway, he sort of breathed out and quietly said, “Yes.”

My Angel was going to be honest with me. We had reached a fundamental level of trust. And, of course, he loved me. I pulled his hand back into mine and his tears reappeared, and at the exact moment, because she has witchlike powers, so did Mom!!!

And he said he was happy. He said he was happy!

It's when we found out he only had a cup of coffee to eat today. I was horrified and Mom was pissed. As soon as my lunch appeared, she dragged him to the cafeteria to eat. Haha ...good for her!

When they returned, David texted our friends to tell them how I was doing and even texted Lanni and acted as my go-between. It was like me texting her. I hardly had to write anything on the pad, he knew what I would want to say.

David walked around the room with me a few times and shut the bathroom door for me when I used it. The rest of the day we simply gazed at each other. It was amazing to me how much we could say without talking. I remember Gary telling me how he and David hardly needed to talk anymore. I wonder if I'm entering the same zone. Or is it actually David who's the wonder here?

When my supper arrived they left, with Mom saying she was going to feed him supper. Poor David doesn't stand a chance! Good! He needs some more meat on those pretty bones. Before they left, Mom gave us a final minute alone, bless her.

I beckoned him over and surprised him by kissing those beautiful lips for the first time ever! He gently kissed me back as his hair fell over my face, like in my X-rated dreams. I almost sprung a woody, but I haven't had any of those lately.

As he left the room, David turned to give me the most awesome, blushing smile.

YES!!!

He’s mine!