Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are based on the authors' lives and experiences and may be changed to protect personal information. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
Headstall's Reflections - 42. Chapter 42 Static
Headstall’s Reflections
Chapter 42 Static
It’s a good thing I can stand my own company
Though I must admit I sometimes do tire of me
For I find myself for the most part alone
My constant company is my laptop and phone
Is this temporary, or a sign of life to come?
To think it may be permanent makes me numb
My kids are building amazing lives of their own
And their time for me sometimes feels it’s on loan
I understand the benefits of baring my heart
An ending has happened and I need a new start
This reality I get, the need to move past grief
But when is the time right to turn over that leaf
I’m floundering badly in this too shallow pool
As I wait for that recharge and my soul’s renewal
Stuck in a wicked quagmire of my own making
Enduring a primal thirst that I should be slaking
Too much reflection and not enough action
Is wallowing giving me some sick satisfaction?
I keep telling myself that I should be ready
But for now I still feel the need to hold steady
Maybe tomorrow, I’ll change my static mind
Maybe tomorrow I’ll seek out and I’ll find
A thread that pulls me away from my gloom
And lifts me from this seductive pit of doom
It’s easier to relive sweet memories of what was
Remain in that trap and let life do what it does
Why has it become harder to let go of what’s gone
Why I am I so afraid of breaking a new dawn
There’s a pit in my stomach that’s made up of fear
I cradle it there as if it’s something held dear
I know it’s not healthy, a crutch and a flaw
Love is worth the risks even if I’m flayed raw
- 14
Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are based on the authors' lives and experiences and may be changed to protect personal information. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
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